DS Nell Jackson and DC Paul Mackintosh are called to investigate the death of an infant, which pathologist Eve Graham has concluded was unnatural. But when Eve starts receiving letters warning her not to put “another innocent mother” behind bars, Nell and crime analyst Carla Brown are tasked with investigating who is threatening one of their own.

I really liked the concept of this and it started off great, even with a slightly confusing split-time narrative. I also really liked that there were two female protagonists, although getting my head around the jumps between their narratives was also sometimes tricky. But I started getting a bit nervous about where the story was going as the book went on. Frankly, I wasn’t that pleased about the resolution, and I felt there were a lot of convoluted subplots that weren’t really tied up by the end of the book. I know people hate hearing something in a book doesn’t feel realistic but this plotline just didn’t even really make sense to me in the end. Perhaps this book was just a little too ambitious in how much it took on at once.

I have literally finished this book and just wow. There have been very few books that can take my breath away like this. I think I need to just take a minute……

….ok that minute did not work. I have to say this book is fantastic if you had not worked that out already. It is a chilling start to the book with the death of a baby, one that will always send shivers through me and then another death happens. Now as shocking as these are, they are not the story. No, the story is something much more intricate and devastating.

One thing I love about this book is that despite the fact I guessed where we were going within the story, Ms Davies was still making me doubt myself. I was adamant I had it figured out, but with the sleight of hand, I was floundering. Was it all as clean-cut as I thought?

Then the end, wow. It was shocking and fricking brave! I did not expect it coming and I loved that it is not what I thought was coming. I had a few tears forming, it was a powerful end, ending the way it all began. Just wow. Then the kidney punch in the epilogue. I mean Jeez! Well, enough said really, just read it.

This is a book that has been playing on my mind. My kindle has been itching to be read all day while I work. If it could talk I know it would be whispering at me to read. I just had to know what was going to happen. I have found Ms Davies writing such a treat. She has these threads of a story and she mixes everything up. We go to the past, we are in the present but we see everything from different perspectives, all adding to an explosive showdown.

I still have not scratched the surface of how epic I really think this book is. The fact we have the point of view of a crime analyst was a fresh look, as we see the behind the scenes rather than hard-hitting with the Detectives investigating. I love Nell, Carla, Paul and Bremner, their little unit does not always click, there is some grating on each other but they get results. At the end of the day, when it counts they have each other backs.

Just wow that is all I have to say. Roll on to the next book!!!!

An excellent thriller full of lots of twists and turns which will keep you guessing until the last page.  Hope this is the start of a series with more to come from this author.

Another book I didn’t particularly enjoy. Parts gripped me more than others but I found the characters a bit meh and overall a bit annoying

Nothing is as it seems in this book.  Just as soon as you think you have the plot figured out, whoops, it comes from the left and throw you for a loop.  Highly recommended.
TB

This is not a comfortable read because it involves child neglect, abuse and sudden infant death. However, it is a completely compelling  police procedural thriller which is emotionally gripping.

Told in two timelines, the characters are multi dimensional, strong and well developed. The author tackles the disturbing subject matter sensitively and I felt the police operations were well researched.

Well written and highly recommended for fans of psychological thrillers.

I was totally gripped from the start. Couldn't stop reading! Very well constructed and good characters.

Thank you NetGalley for the book. I found "When I lost you" to be an absolute gripping thriller. I could not put the book down. Definitely recommend it for fellow thriller/mystery junkies.

This is a brilliant read.
Wonderful well written plot and story line that had me engaged from the start.
Love the well fleshed out characters and found them believeable.
Great suspense and found myself second guessing every thought I had continuousluy.
Can't wait to read what the author brings out next.
Recommend reading.

I was provided an ARC from NetGalley and the publisher.  This is my own honest voluntary review.

Absolutely excellent from start to finish, couldn’t put this book down, read this book in two days, very highly recommended.

Former Crime Analyst Merilyn Davies brings to life a gritty, heart-stopping crime thriller that will have you utterly obsessed.

This is a crime fiction novel told across two separate timelines, detailing the aftermath of a child's death. The finger of blame points at the mother, but an anonymous letter suggests otherwise.

Although this is unbelievable at times, overall the characters are well drawn and the plot intriguing enough to keep you reading, although I spotted most of the twists.

As the first in a series, it'll be interesting to see where future books go.

 Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC without obligation.

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this title.

This was a very confusing book that held a lot of potential that editing could have greatly improved.

A huge Thank You to The author, The publisher and Netgalley for providing the e-arc in exchange for a unbiased review of these works.

This book is packed full of tension and suspense, made for a very good read

Struggle to put into words just how good this book is, it’s outstanding and I raced through it and was gutted when it was over.

It’s not just your average police thriller, it’s also about two young girls Aoife and Mary who both are felt a pretty bad hand from day one, they both crack on and try to do the best with what they have and it doesn’t always work out.

It’s about child abuse and grooming, sudden infant death and how what happens when your young shapes you into the person you are today, it’s extremely sad in places especially the life that Aoife and Mary had, but I loved it and really enjoyed it

One of the best books I’ve read in a very long time, I didn’t see the ending nor the twists that were in it and that’s unusual for me, a truly great read and I wish there were more out there like this one

A must read, fantastic novel

Really enjoyable read. Good characters and a Good story. Well worth a read. Think others will enjoy.

This book touches on two emotional subjects - sudden infant death and child sexual exploitation.  The story is split between two time periods  where the chapters alternate between the past and the present.  The past tells of Aoife and Mary as young girls in care being exploited by an older man which results in tragedy. The present deals with the investigation of sudden child death where Eve, the pathologist who is firm in her opinion that the cases she investigates are deliberate acts caused by the mother. When one case is successfully appealed and Joanne the mother released questions begin to be asked by Nell, a DS dealing with a new child death which Eve attends and again points the finger at the mother. Nell along with an analyst Carla begin to delve deeper into the cases dealt with by Eve and when letters appear that have been sent anonymously to her  emerge the investigation leads to the past. I
A complicated and enjoyable thriller that keeps you guessing about Eve to the very end.

Whilst I enjoyed this book I found there were a few inconsistencies which bugged me as I was reading it. I’m not sure if this was down to the fact that I was reading an arc and in final publication they would be corrected.
The book tells the story of the investigation into a baby’s death and the letter which arrives accusing the pathologist Eve of fabricating the mother’s guilt and referring the police to a previous case, when the father of the child is subsequently murdered the police begin to look into the connections. 
Who is Mary ( the writer of the letters), what is her connection to Eve, Joanne( the previously accused mother) and the baby’s parents.
The book flits between Then- told by Mary and Now -as the investigation team look into the deaths.
Thanks to Netgalley for the opportunity to read and review

A really good police thriller that kept me reading right to the end.  The main characters had substance and were believable.  I could image them as characters in a drama on T.V.  The story was about the friendship of two girls.  Life had dealt them both a bad hand and they did the best they could to survive.  Not a comfortable read about child grooming, abuse and betrayal.  The plot was good and the ending was not what I expected.

We meet Aoife and Mary in a bleak seaside care home, both victims of neglectful and abusive parenting. Vulnerable and seeking affection, they are groomed into another dependent, sexual relationship until a pregnancy blows it all apart.
Some years later, a young mother is wrongly convicted of murdering her baby, and the past begins to catch up with the present.
A UK set crime novel featuring the usual embattled cops, I enjoyed the original opening. However, it was very clear early on where this was going and I’m no Miss Marple.

That said, it was an enjoyable read, not edge of seat thrilling, but an interesting premise nonetheless.