Fascinating insight into the mind of a serial killer.

Dennis Nilsen potentially lays bear his thoughts and feelings. I say potentially, because we honestly don't now if there's truth in here - how much might be bravado or artifice. That's not to say Nilsen comes across well - he's a deeply flawed human, who does express some regret for his actions but at the same time he details his proclivities and murders in quite loving detail. I do feel like some of the sexual fantasies could have been cut/edited for length - worrying to think he might have been getting off thinking about people reading it.

I would have liked maybe some annotated notes or something. You're not always sure you're being told the truth (I'd bet it wasn't at some points), although I understand that the premise is to present Nilsen's words completely unedited.

Utterly fascinating for any true crime fan.

This book was banned from going into print by the Home Office until after Nilsen had passed away.

Covering everything in detail from his careers with the British Army & the Police, from how he killed his first victim to his life in various prisons. It's hard to imagine that someone with so little regard to a human life could be so gentle when it came to nurturing animals, his dog Bleep & his prison companions budgies Hamish & Tweetles.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book & it was a fascinating read into Nilsens mind & his 'passion' for men.

A highly recommended read!

Many thanks to Netgalley for my ARC in return for my honest review

I have read a couple of other books on Nilsen previously, one just recently, but to read one by Nilsen himself is another thing altogether. In the many years he was locked up, he had plenty of time to contemplate and to write his memoirs, and he revised them too. I was amazed at the number of pages he wrote during that time, just incredible. I’m not sure who he thought would have the time to read it all. With that aside, it is a fascinating story and he seems to have quite a detailed memory, as you can tell by how he describes his various stories throughout.

He reminds me of Jeffrey Dahmer, with how he really wanted to keep his victims with him longer, because he was so lonely. But he would eventually end up having to kill them when they wanted to leave, then he had the problem of disposing of their bodies. Dahmer had similar problems, but after he had made his visitors unconscious by drugging them and eventually tried different means to keep them that way indefinitely. That never worked out, and he ended up with another dead body to deal with. Nilsen’s autobiography is certainly a good read for most true crime fans as it gives an inside look at how they think and look back over their crimes. Advance electronic review copy was provided by NetGalley, author Dennis Nilsen, and the publisher.

This book is written by Dennis Nilsen, an infamous serial killer who lived in London in the 1970's and '80's.  In this autobiography, he delves into the psychology behind his murders and his life before, during and after them.  He gives a fascinating insight into the psyche of someone considered a monster.  He is articulate and surprisingly humorous at times, which is something not expected of such a criminal. Highly recommended.

They say some people are victims of circumstance. The obverse of this is that some people become predators of circumstance.

Dennis Nilsen needs no introduction, the Brian Masters book 'Killing For Company' has entered into the hall of fame of true crime classics. Whilst that book is indeed well written and convincing in its theories, it is good here to read the mind of Nilsen in his own words.

Those seeking titillation and graphic detail will be somewhat disappointed. Nilsen does cover the period of his crimes but the bulk of this book (culled from thousands of pages of autobiographical writings) covers his life in prison and his problems with lving within the strictures of the penal system.

Nilsen is clearly a sharp mind with a vocabulary to match and his trade union activities in civvy street still burn strong during his life inside prison.

Nilsen presents his life story in what appears to be a neutral fashion, without artifice or guile. He says his life has been marred by guilt for his victims and seems to invite death as the only thing that will help the families of the victims to obtain some form of closure.

He covers a lot of the tabloid coverage he received and makes efforts to counter the prevailing view of his pereverted goings-on inside prison. In fairness to him, he does make lucid and well argued points about how low tabloid journalism was in the 80's and 90's and the way they would print rumour as fact and misrepresented known facts to alter the context.

So, some may find it unsavoury to read the writings of serial killer but, when someone is as articulate and reflective as this, there is some value in listening to what the man had to say.

Highly recommended.

Narcissistic, introverted, insular, & paranoia; all hallmarks of a psychopath and by his own admission, Dennis ‘Des’ Nilsen displayed all of these signs by his early teens. Like most serial killers, Dennis has himself marked down as anal intellectual, a psychopath so warped with self-indulgence that upon being sentenced to life for the murder of 12 innocent men and boys, the institutionalised serial killer decided to write about his life and ‘struggle’ on the inside. Co-written with longtime confidante Mark Pettigrew, This book offers a remarkably fascinating insight into how those killings are comprehended and understood by the killer, first hand, and in retrospect.

From a young age, Nilsen has a macabre fascination with death and warped sexual fantasies which may or may not relate directly or otherwise to several cases of sexual abuse admitted on Denis as a child and young man. In childhood, his relationship with this grandfather, sexual abuse by him (we only have the authors word) and his death, seems to have marked the young boy with an ingrained perversion of passive male bodies and necrophilia. It’s a warped juxtaposition and one that subsequently, is the reason we are reading this book. As a young man, Des seems to start life quite respectably, 11 years as an army cook ( he became a trained butcher), and even a year in the police force, before settling for life as a militant civil servant. What’s striking throughout this book is that Nilsen explains his necrophilia fantasies, incest, and psychopathic tendencies with such blatant ease. Little recognition (even in hindsight) of his heinous acts is quite astonishing considering that between 1978 and 1983 Nilsen murdered, mutilated, and dismembered 12 gay men picked up on London’s gay scene procured for his perverse sexual passions. Less ambiguous than Brian Masters ‘Killing for Company’, ‘History of a Drowning boy’ is a curated collection of Nilsen’s autobiography written whilst he was in prison and offering a frightening first-hand insight into the mind of a serial killer. Fresh off the back of ITV drama DES, this book is sure to fly off the shelves when published in February of 2020 

Dennis Nilsen died in prison in 2018 and often fought the law to have his autobiography published whilst still alive, his level of narcissism was unbounded.

‘History of a Drowning Boy’ -Dennis Nilsen 
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 

“There are no monsters in this world; they’re just people. There are strong people and there are weak people. I think I’m a amalgam of the two. Judge for yourself”. 

As a ‘True Crime’ enthusiast, I was eager to request this Autobiography of Britain’s prolific serial killer, Dennis Nilsen, upon its availability on NetGalley. This memoir is certainly not for the those of a sensitive disposition- spanning 18 years; it gratuitously recounts sexual abuse, sodomy and murder.

As with most serial killers, this Autobiography outlines the process whereby the victim becomes the victimiser; Nilsen replicates the abuse and trauma he suffered as a child, referring to it as a ‘ritual’, only the key component to his adaptation, in order to *temporarily* fully satisfy his depraved desires, is ultimately death. He tries, in vain, to logically justify his decisions- citing loneliness. Most concerning are his ramblings of lucid dreams that equally disturbed and motivated him to commit more acts of violence. These anecdotes starkly contrasted his eloquent and (for the most part) cohesive writing style, thus further giving credence to his psychological imbalance- this is despite his protests that he was legally sane. 

Following his arrest, Nilsen describes the willingness to be caught and then details the countless years of aggression and often mistreatment he suffered whilst frequenting several prisons within quick succession. (Due to disdain and targeting from other inmates that were repulsed by his horrific acts). 

‘The History of a Drowning Boy’ provides unprecedented, unbiased insight into the psyche of Denis Nilsen, in his own words, without being subject to alteration and propaganda by the media. Although he is not, by any means, a reliable source- as he could quite easily fabricate and manipulate his story, I don’t mistrust that he endured an unfortunate childhood of rejection and most prevalent of all; fear of a further ostracised existence due to his sexual orientation.

Many thanks to NetGalley and the respective publishers for the opportunity to review this ARC.

I would like to thank netgalley and the publisher for an advance copy in exchange for an honest review. I first saw the trailer for the mini series with David Tennant and decided to do some digging before watching. That is how I came across this book, Dennis Nilsen wrote himself and sent to his friend and next of kin. While the book could be considered hard to read for some as it goes into very explicit sexual detail, it is a glimpse inside the mind of Dennis and what made him tick. With chapters including family life, life in the army, police force, then on his killing spree, ending in multiple chapters from all the years he spent in prison after prison, you won’t want to put it down. While I don’t condone by any means what Dennis did, it was well written and provided an insight into the life of Dennis Nilsen from the man himself.