Due to a sudden, unexpected passing in the family a few years ago and another more recently and my subsequent (mental) health issues stemming from that, I was unable to download this book in time to review it before it was archived as I did not visit this site for several years after the bereavements. This meant I didn't read or venture onto netgalley for years as not only did it remind me of that person as they shared my passion for reading, but I also struggled to maintain interest in anything due to overwhelming depression. I was therefore unable to download this title in time and so I couldn't give a review as it wasn't successfully acquired before it was archived. The second issue that has happened with some of my other books is that I had them downloaded to one particular device and said device is now defunct, so I have no access to those books anymore, sadly.

This means I can't leave an accurate reflection of my feelings towards the book as I am unable to read it now and so I am leaving a message of explanation instead. I am now back to reading and reviewing full time as once considerable time had passed I have found that books have been helping me significantly in terms of my mindset and mental health - this was after having no interest in anything for quite a number of years after the passings. Anything requested and approved will be read and a review written and posted to Amazon (where I am a Hall of Famer & Top Reviewer), Goodreads (where I have several thousand friends and the same amount who follow my reviews) and Waterstones (or Barnes & Noble if the publisher is American based). Thank you for the opportunity and apologies for the inconvenience.

An emotional and thought provoking read. Wasn’t what I expected and seemed to ramp up very late in the novel.

Crikey, what an emotional and thought provoking book. How being the parents of an adoptive child can be just as intense, if not more so than a biological child. When things go wrong with your birth child you question yourself, whereas with an adopted child you wonder what else might be behind anything, A good novel

Thank you for the advance copy

I can't believe I didn't read this book earlier, I promise you I will read all of Ms Staincliffe's books now. This was such a thrilling read, you don't know what to expect next! This book is highly recommended.
TB

Fear of Falling is not an easy book to read but none of Cath Staincliffe's standalone books are "easy" to read, but they are IMPORTANT, POWERFUL, GUT WRENCHING, EMOTIONAL and above all "WRITTEN FROM THE HEART".

Cath Staincliffe has written a book about adoption but instead of fluffy happy ever afters, she focuses on what could go wrong and she does NOT hold back.  Writing with a personal insight as she tells the reader that she was adopted herself as a baby in the postscript, this book is a very powerful and heart breaking tale of love, friendship, family, parenthood and how far you will go to protect your child.

Fear of Falling focuses on the friendship of Lydia and Bel who met as teenagers and follows their lives through love, marriage and motherhood.  Bel is a free spirited, independent young woman, who can't settle down, flits from one job to another and one bed to another and falls pregnant accidentally.  Lydia is a hardworking, conscientious, careful and focused and falls in love with Mac in her early twenties.  When they decide to try for a baby, Lydia and Mac's life is turned upside when they find out they can't fall pregnant without IVF and when the final attempt of IVF fails they decide to adopt.

It's impossible for the reader not to feel emotion or empathy towards Lydia in her struggle to become a mother and equally it's difficult not to feel angry with Bel with her approach to motherhood, both characters are so different but so brilliantly brought to life by the author.

This is a phenomenal piece of writing about a very difficult topic and the fact that I read this in an afternoon proves it was literally unputdownable!  Cath Staincliffe is one of those authors that I know before I even read the blurb that the story will be unique and compelling, gripping and powerful and more importantly thought-provoking.  5 stars from me.

I requested Fear of Falling from NetGalley on the basis that it was by Cath Staincliffe, knowing nothing about the plot, so started reading with very little if any idea of what to expect. This made it perhaps even more hard hitting than it would have been anyway.

It starts with narrator Lydia, a teenager in the 1980s, meeting and being instantly fascinated by the reckless Bel - their friendship is a thread which runs through the whole book, following Lydia’s life from the 80s to the present day... work, relationships, marriage to the lovely Mac, fertility troubles and ultimately their adoption of Chloe, a neglected toddler born to a drug using young mother. Chloe’s early life experiences have not been good, but she’s young enough, surely, for that damage to be repaired, given enough love and care. Isn’t she?

Lydia, a scientist, and her tattooist husband Mac are wonderful characters and clearly marvellous parents who are devoted to giving Chloe a happy life. There are no limits to their love. But sometimes, any amount of love might not be enough.

The adjective in my mind while reading was “unflinching”. The author pulls no punches in depicting the pain and difficulty of life with Chloe, a girl who fundamentally doesn’t believe she deserves to be loved. There are no easy answers or Hollywood endings to be found here. I couldn’t imagine how it was all going to end, and I could never imagine how it actually did.

Some powerful themes emerge, particularly the need for better support when things are impossibly hard, but also the importance and lasting impact of the earliest experiences (according to Erikson’s theory, a time when a child learns basic trust or mistrust: that her cries will be responded to and her needs met, that her world is a safe place.... or that it isn’t). While we see things only from Lydia’s viewpoint, the story is told with huge compassion for everyone involved.

It could be viewed as a cautionary tale about the perils of adoption, but that is clearly far from the intention. In a postscript to the novel, Cath Staincliffe tells us that she was herself adopted as a baby, so clearly she has a personal insight and connection to the subject, although her story is (thankfully) very different from Chloe’s. And Cath is at pains to point out that most adoptions work well and very few adopters ever regret their decision.

A wonderful, heartbreaking book, highly recommended.

This is a book that covers so many topics including friendship, infertility, depression and adoption. We follow the unlikely friendship of Lydia and Bel, from being teenagers to being mothers. Lydia and Mac adopt Chloe after struggling with rounds of fertility treatment. Bel, who cannot sustain a long term relationship, becomes pregnant and gives birth to Freya. As Chloe grows up she puts a big strain on Lydia and Mac’s relationship, causing them all sorts of problems as she is unable to fit in social situations or connect with anyone. Things come to a head with tragic consequences to Chloe and to Freya. This is a heat wrenching story and one that makes quite difficult reading but a book that you cannot put down.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for giving me the opportunity to read and review this book.

4.5 stars. I have read a few of this authors other books throughly enjoying them and this one didn’t disappoint. There was a lot going on in this book, some of it quite sad and difficult to read but it was fantastically written. Would highly recommend but be prepared to shed a few tears

This is a harrowing read and a very very sad story. but so well written . Read it with a box of tissues nearby

This is such a difficult book to review, I finished it a few weeks ago and am still struggling to sort out my thoughts.

As always with this author the writing is spot on and the characters live and breathe in this emotive, often hard hitting, multi themed storyline.

Covering friendships at their best and worst, infertility, envy, depression, the heartbreak of IVF, adoptive parents left to struggle without adequate support, different parenting styles, judgement and the heart-wrenching consequences that the factors listed above lead us to.

Although it was a page turner and I had to know what happened I can't honestly say that I enjoyed the book, the writing is superb but reading was like watching a slow motion clip of something falling onto a hard floor and being unable to move to catch it, it's not an uplifting read but is definitely one that resonated and one that will stay with me for a long time.

Many, many thanks to NetGalley and Little. Brown Book Group UK for the opportunity to read this book, my honest thoughts and opinion are expressed in this review.

4-4.5 stars

Lydia and Bel have been friends for years. Lydia is desperate for a child and with her partner, Mac, they have fertility treatments but unfortunately it did not work for them. They decide to adopt. They get a toddler called Chloe who challenges them much more than they ever expected. Bel also has a daughter called Freya who is about the same age as Chloe. Freya does not like some of the choices her mother makes.

Wow. What a journey this book tajes us through. We get an insight into what people go through when getting IVF treatment and the process people have to go through to adopt. There is a lot going on in the book but I don't want to give away any spoilers. The book also covers post natal depression. It's heartbreaking but it will also resonate with some readers. Cath Staincliffe has a wonderful style of writing that quickly draws you in. This is a must read, even although there is a sad element to it. I highly recommend this book.

I would like to thank NetGalley, Little Brown Book Group UK and the author Cath Staincliffe for my ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Wow this is a book not to be missed. A truely heart wrenching book that takes you on a journey with the characters themselves. It covers a multitude of topics including friendship, love, adoption, self harm, rejection, ivf and so much more.

The book tells us about the lives of Lydia and Bel, two very different people but the best of friends. We first meet them when they are still at school and have their lives ahead of them. We then see them develop into young women and their lives take very different paths. Bel finds herself with an unplanned baby, Freya, while Lydia and her partner Mac find themselves going through the adoption process after several failed IVF treatments. Finally their dreams come true and they adopt two year old Chloe, but the adoption is anything but easy. And then tragedy strikes !!

I really don’t want to go into too much more detail as really don’t want to give anything away. This really is a book that you have to read and experience the journey yourself. A truely heart wrenching story with some amazing characters and insights into what IVF and adoption can really be like for some.

Thank you to Little, Brown Book Group UK and NetGalley for a digital copy of this book.

Oh my goodness, this book tore my heart out and stomped on it a bit before stuffing it back in. It tackles quite a few big themes including friendship, motherhood, fertility and adoption and pulls no punches in describing them.
We follow Lydia and Bel, friends since forever, as they grow up. We see their teenage years and the shenanigans there and follow how they grow up and begin to start families of their own. Bel becomes pregnant by accident with daughter Freya, subsequently suffering from PND, whereas Lydia, together with Mac, suffer many rounds of failed fertility treatment, and eventually adopt toddler Chloe. Freya and Chloe are chalk and cheese with Freya ever questioning her mother's behaviour in a bit of a holier than thou way and Chloe pushing every boundary well beyond breaking point to the utter frustration of her parents. Things come to a head one night with tragic consequences which really tests the two best friends' relationship. Is there any coming back from this?
I have read a few books by this author and have always been impressed with her characterisation. Here though she moves it up a notch and gave me the best characters I could ever wish for and, to top that, let them play out the most emotionally character driven storyline. There are so many themes running through the book, most of which are quite hard hitting, but I never felt unsafe, it never got too heavy. Yes, OK, at times I did put it down for a couple of seconds to catch my breath but I would still class it as balanced.
With Lydia's relationship with Chloe being quite fraught (understatement) it would have been so easy to have her spiral into a bit of a caricature martyr type, but this never quite happens and I really felt with her and how she battled on throughout all the pain. yes to her own detriment but always her choice. With the situation being one of adoption, it has to be handled right and I believe here, the author has done her research brilliantly. Shocking, but all true and quite hard to accept at times. She also had to battle fertility issues whereas her best friend got pregnant in a carelessly easy way and didn't ever seem to want the baby that followed. Yes she was suffering from PND but she didn't really come across as the most maternal of people.
I could bang on waxing lyrical about this book forever but I would end up giving much too much away. If you like strong character driving books with a bit of emotional substance then this book might tick the boxes for you. It definitely did for me. My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.

Picked up this book without even reading the blurb. Love this author, she has such a way with words and draws you in. Very unsettling book, really looking at childhood and adoption from a very different perspective - less rose-tinted, more dark glasses.

I hadn't considered this angle on the story before. Well told and absorbing, it's a bit like a car crash. You don't want to look but you can't help yourself. It's the same with this book.

My only criticism is that it doesn't ever explore Chloe's point of view. What was she thinking all those years? How did she feel about the whole situation?

Well worth a read, thought provoking and offers a very different outcome from the usual tales. Highly recommended for that reason.

Fear of Falling is another amazing book by Cath Staincliffe. The main themes of friendship, motherhood and adoption are dealt with so very well it is absolutely impossible not to enjoy this book.
When Mac and Lydia adopt two year old Chloe, they know it will not all be rosy, and yet they did not expect to be completely abandoned to deal with her issues alone. From my experience it is a wholly realistic reflection of adoption in the present time, and demonstrates the types of issues children coming from the care system face and the problems adoptive parents have to deal with when they try to seek help with those issues.
Coupled with the wonderful writings on the lifelong friendship between Lydia and Bel and the ups and downs that they face and the marital issues between Mac and Lydia this makes for a wonderful book.
Well done Cath! I highly recommend this book, as well as her last book, ‘Girl in the Green Dress’
Thanks to NetGalley for a Kindle copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Cath Staincliffe is a remarkably gifted writer on difficult and tough issues within our real life contemporary worlds, explored with depth, compassion and humanity in her brilliantly gripping fiction. As a teenager, Lydia is drawn to the exciting and cool Bel, with a relationship developing between the very different girls that lasts from their wild teenage years right through the joys, difficulties, traumas and tragedies that befall them as the years goes by. The more grounded Lydia with her more loving family falls in love with the artistic tatooist, Mac, with the two settling into a strong relationship that withstands the trauma of Lydia being unable to conceive. The more flighty and self centred Bel goes through numerous men, lacking the capacity to build a sustainable long term relationship, easily getting pregnant and giving birth to Freya, with whom she struggles to connect with, leading to a fraught relationship that persists into the future.

Through the thoroughly authentic characters of Lydia and Bel, Staincliffe explores the nature and dynamics of family, friendship, post-natal depression, mother and daughter relationships, the fraught, debilitating, and depressing process of IVF treatments, the complex adoption process, and the high likelihood of mentally and emotionally damaged children put up for adoption who can tear apart families and marriages through the years. Mac and Lydia adopt the gorgeous toddler Chloe, only to struggle with the stresses and strains of a daughter that struggles to connect with anyone, unable to fit in social situations at all or in school, and who cannot help but be destructive to those around her. Personally, I cannot imagine myself having the levels of endurance and patience that Lydia exhibits, and it is barely surprising that Chloe pushes Mac and Lydia's marriage to the point of destruction. What is more, the couple face a complete lack of support from social services, there is no respite care available with the damaging budget cuts and mental health therapy is only available if they go private.

This is powerful and authentic storytelling from the author which has its origin in her personal history of being adopted herself. Her research on the wide range of issues covered is impressive and utilised perfectly in the narrative. I cannot imagine anyone not being drawn into the perfectly drawn characters and their development, and the book's moving and compelling storylines that will ring true for so many readers. The issues covered are traumatic and harrowing, but there is much needed for chinks of hope and light in the ability of a friendship to endure the worst that can happen and the survival of a marriage tested to the brink of separation. Staincliffe does a stellar job with her inclusion of a social and political commentary that humanises the unbearable costs of the austerity inflicted on ordinary families. If you have never read Cath Staincliffe before, I strongly urge you to do so. This is storytelling of the highest order and comes highly recommended. Many thanks to Little, Brown for an ARC.

Another powerful read from the very talented Ms Staincliffe. Complex and totally absorbing, the plot pulls you along effortlessly towards its dramatic, highly emotional climax. A wonderful modern tragedy.

What a powerful read, a strong story with not an easy subject at the heart of it, great characters woven together to create a story of friends family and relationships, a really fab read

This book left me reeling! Lydia and Bel meet as teenagers and the book charts their friendship over the following decades. It could be described as a coming of age novel as well as a domestic/family drama, and the characterisation is wonderful. We follow Lydia and Bel through teenage angst, major fall outs and reconciliations. Much of the drama centres on the two women starting, or attempting to start, a family, with Issues such as fertility problems, post natal depression, and adoption being explored.
Heartbreakingly tragic at times, this story will resonate with many people. I love the author's style of writing and this book will definitely stay with me for a long time. Fantastic read.

Thanks Netgalley and the Publisher. I really like this author and have read all her books. This book is about friendship, relationships and is just a terrific 5 star read.