This is a brilliant book and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute. There are so many police crime books available that coming up with something unique must be pretty difficult. This book is a very good attempt at something new. The characters are all of interest and you do get to learn about them. Clever ending as you are puzzled about how Aloife can be around. I guess with a bit of deep thinking there is only one possibility. The final section of the Epilogue takes you back to the very first chapter and you think ' of course that makes sense now;
Very, very good book and not to be missed

Wow, this had me guessing right to the end, just when I thought I had an inkling of what was happening I got side swiped. Nell and Carla made to be great characters, but the dynamics between all of the characters were important to the storyline. This book never let up and drew me in from start to end, it left me wanting to read more and wanting to see where it was heading, delicately wrote about the serious issues the plot threw at us readers, a great police procedural with a little psychological thriller theme thrown in there, I will certainly look for more from this author.

This is a tough story line and probably contains triggers for some people. The main characters were an interesting bunch and the police team will hopefully appear in more books as this would make a great start to a new series. The plot is complex and starts to unwind in the last third/quarter of the book. Some were not a surprise but some were, so it kept me guessing. I received a free e-ARC from NetGalley and the publishers in exchange for an honest review

#WhenIlostYou #NetGalley This was a refreshing change to see the story from a crime analysts point of view and the fact that author herself was a former analyst showed through in the detail. For me, the book was a little slow to get going and the flitting between past and present was a little confusing, but once it got going there was plenty of drama and action. I liked the characters of Carla and Nell - two strong women determined to get to the truth. I guessed the ending about two thirds of the way through but was curious to see how it would all come together at the end. A good read.

Thanks to Merilyn Davis and Random House for the opportunity to read and review this book. The book set around the death of a young baby whilst very disturbing will keep you gripped. It flips between the past and the present where two stories interlink, two little girls in a care home lonely and sad form a friendship. What has this to do with this tragedy. A little complex to follow at times but a really intense good read.

I’m not sure this genre is for me. The plot was a bit complicated at times and not always easy to follow. It’s difficult when the topics cover sensitive issues such as baby deaths but that I did feel the author did in a sensitive way Once into the book things did improve so push past those early chapters. Thanks NetGallery.

Enjoyable book to read. I did find it a little confusing at first between the story being sometimes in the present and then in the past. However once I got used to this and really got into the story I became gripped with it.

I found this book quite gripping and enjoyed the different times in which it was set, taking the story forwards and back wards. It was quite hard to follow at the beginning but as the story unravelled it drew me in more and more.

A good psychological thriller

Thanks for allowing me to review this book

When I Lost You is a gripping, tense and harrowing read that I found hard to put down.

This book deals with the difficult issues of sexual abuse and grooming which made for difficult reading at times. The author does handle the situations sensitively without ever glorifying it for the story. This also makes the story seem more real and therefore emotional as you feel that this could actually have happened.

I enjoyed learning more about the analyst’s role which I didn’t know much about before starting this book. This also provided the reader with a different view of a police procedural than a normal detective one. The author used to be an analyst which made it more fascinating for me and made me wonder which parts of the book were based on her experiences.

One of the things I most enjoyed were the two strong females, Carla and Nell, in this book. I thought they made a great team and I liked following them as they solved the difficult case. I thought they handled everything they came up against with great skill and I loved that they were able to show everyone how capable they both were.

This is a book that draws you in immediately and I found very hard to put down. I kept promising myself I’d read just one more chapter but then kept having to read one more and then another and another. The ending was very clever and took me completely by surprise which I always love.

This is the author’s debut novel and I can’t wait to read more from her in the future. I hope we see more of Carla and Nell too as I thought they made a great team.

Huge thanks to Rachel Kennedy for my copy of this book and for inviting me onto the blog tour.

I really enjoyed this book read it in two days as it had me hooked, I needed to know the what, how, when, why, and who.
The characters were believable...... the author takes you on a journey past and present to create the story though I’d managed to figure out some of what was going on it was interesting and almost plausible as to why!! It shows how delicate our mental health can be and how we can almost be someone we are not!! I’d definitely recommend this book!!
Hoping this becomes a series from this author!!

Really enjoyable although sad at times, maybe that.s just me at the thought of a child dying. However a great story and definitely one to keep you in there.

For DS Nell Jackson the City of Oxford brings the usual problems you’d expect to find in any place largely populated by students, and also more hard hitting crime – and the premise for When I lost you – Murder.

Nell is faced with an infantile death, that finds Eve Graham a pathologist blaming the mother, despite the mother giving details as to what happened. It echos a previous child’s death and subsequent prison term for Joanne, now released due to the the re-examination of her case.

But Eve starts receiving letters, the writer unknown and yet they know details, personal details, who’s sending them? – how do they know these thing about Eves past? A deep and dark past that comes back to haunt her and test her will.

Its up to Nell and her sidekick Carla Brown – crime Analyst – to solve these and find the individuals whove murdered the next victim, Connor O’Brian

Nell and Carla make a great team – and the fact that author Merilyn Davies worked as Crime Analyst herself, shows that the processes Carla goes through and the way Nell uses her police skills from the field are used in real life.

I think this book shows great thought and meticulous planning has gone in it to this strong debut and believe this is only the start for Merilyn Davies. Shes covered some sensitive subjects and handled them sympathetically and I for one will be following Nell & Carla’s progress and believe this is the start of something great for Jackson & Brown.

This ARC was courtesy of netgalley - the thoughts and opinions are mine and unbiased

I am loving being able to read thrillers through netgalley - it is a genre that I don't usually read and feel so fortunate to have been able to gorge on thrillers through this medium

I haven't read any of Merilyn Davies work before but will certainly be looking out for her in future

I loved this

Emotive and evocative - I became lost in this - no pun intended - well written, with characters I quickly came to care for

I'm not gonna lie - I cried at the ending - no mean feat

Can't wait to read more from this author

Beautiful !!!

This was a solid crime read for me. I really enjoyed the police procedural aspects and the author’s background shines through here.

I did find the plot a bit overly complicated at times and had to re read several passages to make sure my understanding was correct. Overall the past and present structure did work but at times I felt there were too many characters to keep track of which detracted from my enjoyment of the novel a little bit.

Some difficult themes are dealt with here such as child deaths and grooming but the author deals with these sensitively and it never feels gratuitous.

I liked the police staff we meet in the novel, they are well rounded characters and I can see them being featured in further books in the series.

Overall this was a good read and a fairly gripping detective story, I just feel there were a couple of elements that could have been a bit ‘tidier’ for me to have enjoyed it even more.

Thank you very much to the author and publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

4 Stars from me

A book of two distinct halves which wrap around each other - one following the present day police investigation into the death of a baby - and one following the fate of two young girls who were in care 30 years ago.

I found the storyline featuring the care system, and the two girls trying desperately to find love in all the wrong places, to be by far the more compelling and would happily have read more about their tragic lives. It put me in mind of the recently televised documents regarding the mystery surrounding the disappearance and suspected murder of Charlene Downes.

Concentration is a must with this book and I did find myself muddled a couple of times when reading the present day police investigation side of things. Having said that, the main characters throughout the book are well crafted and highly engaging.

I really enjoyed When I Lost You and look forward to more from this author. 

Synopsis: When a young couple are the lead suspects for the murder of their only child, Crime Analyst Carla Brown and DS Nell Jackson are assigned to investigate.

The evidence seems conclusive, but something just doesn’t feel right.

The case is quickly cast into doubt when the lead forensic pathologist starts receiving threatening letters – containing details only the police should know.

Who’s sending them? What do they want? And how did they get hold of the information?

As Carla and Nell dig deeper, it soon becomes clear that this case isn’t the first of its kind.

They must stop at nothing to find the truth – even if it hits close to home.

FORMER CRIME ANALYST MERILYN DAVIES BRINGS TO LIFE A GRITTY, HEART-STOPPING CRIME THRILLER THAT WILL HAVE YOU UTTERLY OBSESSED

'A compelling page-turner - assured, fresh, engrossing. I can’t wait to read more about Nell and Carla.’ - Mel Sherratt

Aoife and Mary are two young girls living in a care home. They befriend a cafe owner called Alf but after being kind to them he starts grooming them. Aoife becomes pregnant with his child and one night on the beach their lives are turned upside down.
Many years later Crime Analyst Carla Brown and DS Nell Jackson are investigating the murder of a young child. But is all it seems? and when the lead forensic pathologist starts receiving threatening letters it seems there is more going on but who is behind it and why?
I couldn't put this down!

I never repeat the blurb. This was an intriguing story, featuring characters who took a little time to warm to, although I certainly hope we meet them again. Tragic and complex story spanning decades with a heart-breaking conclusion.

When a novel's prologue ends with the words "I did not kill my baby!" you get an idea in your head about how the story is going to go. On reading the synopsis too, you think that the book is about the couple who have lost their child and in a way it is. It's also so much more!

When I Lost You starts with DS Jackson and DC Mackintosh called to a flat in Oxford over a reported death of an infant. Nell Jackson is convinced that it's another Sudden Infant Death but on arrival Eve Graham, the pathologist tells them it's murder, and not only that but it was the mother who killed the little girl. Nell Jackson is back at work after being stabbed thanks to a crime analyst missing a vital detail so when she finds out the new DCI wants her to work closely with Crime Analyst Carla Brown, she can't help but be resentful.



Nothing about this case is as straightforward as it seems. There are letters being written to the pathologist, essentially calling her a liar and accusing her of ensuring innocent women have been convicted thanks to her testimony. Nell and Carla aren't entirely sure what to believe as they both know Eve but what if she is getting it wrong?



When I Lost You is part police procedural and part psychological thriller, told in two different timelines simply titled Then and Now. It's quite confusing at first, especially if you don't realize that's the case, but this is what makes the story such compulsive reading. Then is about two girls living in a care home and being groomed by a local cafe owner, Now is about three women who may or may not know more than they're saying. Carla is closely linked to Eve because of Eve's husband Gerry who was her first sergeant and is utterly determined that Eve would not have deliberately allowed innocent women to be sent to prison.



When I Lost You is a wonderfully addictive story, with a unique plotline, and twists and turns that you don't see coming. I will admit to trying to guess who certain people were quite early on in the book but it soon became evident that I was completely wrong. It does become obvious at one point, who the 'guilty party' is, but this doesn't take anything away from the story and it was fascinating seeing the different strands of the story coming together to an explosive ending.



When I Lost You is a gripping tale of loss, wrongful conviction, and abuse, which if not handled in the right way, could be distressing but Merilyn Davies has created a page-turner of a first novel in a wonderful location. Having gone to Oxford it was nice to see someone write about things other than the gleaming spires and students! I very much enjoyed the developing relationship between Nell and Carla and sincerely hope we get to see more of them in the future!

Read and reviewed in exchange for a free copy from NetGalley. This book was gripping and I was very invested in the storyline, but I found it hard to follow the plot. I felt like threads were established but not followed through on, and it lacked clarity. That said, I did really enjoy it and was keen to see how it progressed. I'd like to see more books about this policing team, in particular the Carla/Nell duo.

Whew !!!!!! What a brilliant read this was. The prologue gets its claws into you right from the first sentence and you are held captive to the very last word. Taunt, tightly written, endless tension, with a race along pace this book has all the elements that will make it not only a bestseller but the start of a great fictional partnership. With a mix of past and present the author gives you two perspectives on a crime that happened years ago. The fallout from that crime has laid dormant within the lives of the those involved. Unfortunately the past has a way of reaching out and bleeding its poison into the present. Once the door to the past cracks open its not long before its flung wide open. Its up to the partnership of Carla and Nell to peel away the layers of the case to get to the core and discover who is behind the crimes. A partnership of ups and downs its the need for the truth that ultimately unites them into a the working partnership that helps to solve what has been such a puzzle of a case. The authors past gives the book a realistic feel, her time with the Met and the details she uses helps the book come to life in your hands and imagination. Sometimes you read a book whose ingenuity of plot leaves you stunned and this is such a book. I highly recommend you go out and buy it.