Lovely feminist story with usual Holly Bourne style about loving yourself for yourself.

It was nice to read.
Thanks a lot, NG and the publisher for this copy.

Holly Bourne is one of my favorite authors and I was ridiculously thrilled to receive an ARC of her latest book, Pretending. Now, the premise of this is utterly unique and one that I think will interest a lot of people- wold your dating life be more successful if you pretended to be the female 'ideal', at least according to men? Think 'Cool Girl' monologue from Gone Girl.

As with all Holly Bourne books, I really enjoyed this. It was an easy read with good pacing, humorous writing, and a series of important feminist messages. So why the 3.5 stars? Well, largely I felt as though certain elements of this book were laid on a bit thick, particularly when it came to the domestic abuse element of the plot. Please understand feminism is a cause that I am deeply passionate about and I 100% agree with every point that Bourne was trying to make here. However, I just felt that in places the execution of these points boarded on clumsy and it felt almost like ranting at times, which isn't necessarily the best way to put a point across. In other words, whilst I adore Holly Bourne's work and will continue to inhale everything that she writes, this book felt like it was telling rather than showing. That being said, it was still an excellent and important story that I would recommend to almost anyone.

A very enjoyable 3.5 Stars

This was frickin great. A timeless tale for women the world over about accepting yourself and learning to trust people around you. The ones who aren’t dickheads, anyway.

I enjoyed parts of this book. I liked the fact that abuse and rape were discussed in a sympathetic and empathetic way. Some of April’s story was hard to read. She had been hurt a lot physically and mentally in past relationships. Parts of the book were funny. I laughed a few times. I thought that the ending was predictable but overall the story was good.

Thank you to Netgalley for my copy.

It's safe to say, Holly Bourne knows how to write women. She has a real knack for portraying the female mind so accurately that you'll nod through several points of this book. And for that, I applaud her. However, overall I had really mixed feelings about this book. I don't personally believe it is as good as her first adult novel, How Do You Like Me Now which felt a lot more fresh and innovative. The plot of Pretending is full of rich, diverse characters and the author tackles some tough subjects (of which I'm hoping there will be a Trigger Warning for) incredibly well but overall, it all felt a bit bland. Right before you even start reading the first page, it's pretty obvious where the story is going to go whereas I would have prefered a more surprising ending. The ending also seemed incredibly rushed, to the point I was left thinking, '...Is that it?' If the book was always going to head towards the ending that it did, I actually think the book would have been a hell of a lot stronger if that had happened at some point during the middle of the plot and the remaining half of the book explored the effects of this. I'll always enjoy how Holly writes however this book just didn't do it for me.

Where do I even begin with reviewing this amazing book? How do I do this wonderful piece of fiction justice? This book is so much more than entertainment, this is the book we all needed to read, a book so many of us can identify with, I feel seen and I feel heard and I feel like so many of the things in my head have finally and honestly been put down on paper for all to read.



This book centres around April who is just such a wonderful character to spend time with, April isn't always likable and doesn't always make the best choices but she is real and she is flawed just like us and she is just so easy to relate to, to empathise with and ultimately we will all be championing her to get through this.



April has been through a lot, like so many of us and so definitively exercise care if you are triggered by rape, sexual violence or abuse of any kind. This book does deal with some tough subjects but by dealing with those subjects through character April and through this fictional world that she lives in and the fiction world she revolves around somehow there is less of an 'edge'. Rape becomes not a statistic but something that real people deal with all the time and something that not enough people bring to light or talk about what happens when life carries on. I don't know how Holly Bourne managed it but she has woven so much trauma and so much truth into this piece of fiction so that we can all read and relate and recognise.



For all that this book deals with trauma and sexual violence, there is also heart and humour throughout the pages. This writer just says it like it is, what we're all thinking and she did make me laugh as well as exclaim 'me too' so many times throughout this book. At one point April ponders 'Living Life and being an adult is terrible. Why does nobody tell you how terrible it is?' And there are other moments too where April ponders how to be the perfect date and what mean really mean when they say on their dating profile that they are looking for a 'partner in crime'. Those moments are just hilarious but definitely fall under the 'if you didn't laugh you would cry' category.



For a book that has been marketed as a romcom, some people might not expect the depth and the raw emotion that this book contains. It touched my soul and is beautifully written and everybody need to read it now. With phrases like 'leaves slug trails of guilt glistening through my blood' how could you not?

April tries to figure out life after an abusive relatioship. Since she was raped by her now ex boyfriend she can't trust men. All her relationships can't survive the trauma she lives with. After yet another relationship which turns out to be a total fiasco April wants to switch the places. Now she wants to be in power. April decides to become Gretel - a woman of dreams (and one who doesn't exist in real life). She decides to pick men up and then destroy them by dumping them. In this all charade April by chance finds a guy who is like no other men she used to date. Will she ever love again? It's for you to find out.
I love Holly Bourne's books, they say about real issues the way the things are. No coats of sugar. Just stating the things in all their glory wether we like or not.

Trigger Warnings: Rape, Domestic Abuse, Abuse and Trauma. 

Firstly, I want to say thank you to Netgalley and Hodder & Stoughton for giving me an e-arc of Pretending by Holly Bourne I am so grateful for this opportunity. 

I LOVE THIS BOOK. THIS BOOK IS SO IMPORTANT. THIS BOOK IS GOING TO BE ONE OF MY FAVOURITES OF 2020. 

I completely understand that this book won't be for everybody, and due to certain circumstances some people won't be able to read this due to the trigger warnings listed above. I had no idea what this book was about going into it, I just knew it was by Holly Bourne and due to that needed to get my hands on it asap. I will say I was very shocked when I realised what Pretending was about, and that was part way through reading it. But, thankfully, I am able to deal with the above and therefore proceeded to read and I am so glad that I did. 

I love a book that can make me laugh, not many can do that without me rolling my eyes feeling like the humour was forced. Pretending made me laugh on the third page, THE THIRD PAGE. I mean you need to read it for yourself, but if Holly Bourne didn't just reenact every girls situation then I don't know what she has done. Honestly, she seriously speaks to me! From this moment onwards, I knew that I would love April, and I was not wrong. She is my spirit animal. 

I would like to highlight that whilst I have just mentioned that this book deals with rape and proceeded to talk about how it made me laugh, this book does not make the subject matter into a joke. There are light hearted parts in this book, ones that will make you laugh. But when it needs to be serious, it is, there is no jokes made about Rape and the situation those that have experienced this find themselves in. This is such a delicate subject, that I do not think many authors are brave enough to delve into, but Holly Bourne has and she has portrayed this amazingly. She has done the subject matter so much justice. 

I cant believe I am about ti say this, but I really enjoyed the romance in this book. Yes I said it. The heartless cow over here who rolls her eyes at all romances because they just aren't realistic. I LOVED IT. I was routing for April throughout the whole of this book. I cringed at times that I needed to, and at points I wanted to shake her and ask her what she was doing. Honestly, I don't think I have ever connected with a character so well. 

The ending, I think the ending kind of fell a little bit flat. I loved it, don't get me wrong, this book is everything. But I maybe would have liked a bit more of the ending to see where the relationship went next after the reveal. I won't say much more without spoiling it so I'll leave it there but this is such a minor flaw that did not impact my enjoyment of the book. 

If you can handle the trigger warnings that are listed I think you should read this book. Everyone that can, should read this book! It is so important and so eye-opening. I cant praise Pretending and Holly Bourne enough and I cannot wait for other people to be able to read it.

This is Holly Bourne's second novel for adults and, like her YA, it doesn't shy away from difficult topics whilst also being entertaining. April wants a relationship, but after several failed attempts she decides to become someone different - Gretel. Gretel doesn't take any nonsense. Gretel is heartless. Gretel is April's revenge. But then Gretel meets Joshua.

So far, so romantic comedy. But Pretending is much more than that - April's past hides some serious trauma, and her day job working for a charity that works with sex education and advice is starting to burn her out. Holly Bourne doesn't shy away from dealing with that, and some of it is a bit of a harrowing read. But there's also hope, the boxing class is particularly affirming and April has good friends and colleagues. Definitely worth reading!

I read this in a day, totally gripped! This can be such a bleak book at times. Reading about April's traumatic experiences is difficult, especially in the moments where she's really struggling with her anger and her hopelessness, and Holly Bourne's depiction of relationships and dating can be a little unrelenting at times. But you kind of know what you're in for when the book starts with a rant beginning with 'I hate men'. Holly Bourne does a brilliant job of showing how such a horrific experience can totally colour your attitude towards men and sex, and overall this was a book I really enjoyed. The characters are so realistic - Joshua is appealing but not perfect, and none of the relationships are idealised. I will definitely be reading all of Holly Bourne's new releases.

…to offer an apology for being myself

I loved this book, and the line that sums up this book perfectly. It’s an important book masquerading as a light-hearted story. It should be handed out to all thirteen-year-old girls in school as a cautionary tale. Brutally honest the way every rom-com can’t be, even if they tried. It’s an examination of society and it’s constructs around women, and deeper, women’s constructs around women. As well as a good read, I found myself reading about probably most thirty-something women's experiences, including my own. Not an easy feat.

Four stars.

CW: rape and PTSD.

April hates men. So she decides to pick one unlucky sod and take revenge for all the injustice she and other women have faced.

Bourne writes a funny, dark, feminist and heartbreaking tale about rape, mental illness, and the ways in which hetero women twist themselves into caricatures to find love. Bourne has her finger on the cultural pulse and several times I felt called out to change my behaviour as I could recognise the ways in which we try to become Gretel, in which we pretend in relationships. I may have disliked Gretel but she is a useful guide as to how NOT to act in relationships. Aside from that, the character of April herself is relatable (almost to a fault) and honestly I want to tell Holly Bourne to reduce the volume please? You’re shouting my life to everyone 😭

Bourne also writes the difficulty of overcoming sexual trauma and the long journey it has to take. She speaks honestly about the feelings and the steps a victim goes through and has to take. She lays out the rawness of April’s anger, despair and vulnerability. This book reminds me of Woman at Point Zero and has me rethinking the justification of revenge and the mental health implications. Bourne carries out an unflinchingly honest conversation about trauma and the audacity of debating a survivor’s trauma because the debate itself is privileged. However, it is not all bleak as she offers some light for the character and it is important to remember that.

This is a book I could return to again and again despite it’s heavy material. It is not an easy read but it was worth it to me.

Thank you to Hodder Books and Netgalley for sending me an ARC in exchange for an honest review

This is a fun yet thought-provoking novel that I think will speak to a lot of 20/30 somethings. Bourne writes wittily and poignantly about many topics (some more difficult than others) and she made me want to keep reading, which is always a good sign. Would recommend for anyone looking for a more intelligent strand of “chick lit”.

How many different ways can I say I LIVE HOLLY BOURNE BOOKS!?! Yet again, this is another masterpiece. Full of angst, fun, honesty and totally relatable this book has something for everyone

I love Holly Bourne and I love 'Pretending'. It's like Bourne has reached into my brain and discovered my inner monologue from my mid-20s; it's all there on the page, so skillfully written and so easy to read in one or two sittings, devoured from start to finish as quickly as possible like an Easter egg! I really enjoyed 'Pretending', and loved the exploration of the themes: friendship, trust, consent, and learning to move on from trauma. It's a good book.

It does feel a little like a YA novel, as I know is Holly's speciality. Although this is a novel for adults it still has that straightforward linear simplicity that YA novels thrive on.

I have read How Do You Like Me Now? several times and knew this was going to be a hard act to live up to - I love Tori Bailey in Holly Bourne's first adult novel and have stolen several of her sayings and figures of speech. Like Tori, April (aka Gretel) the heroine of Pretending, is not straightforwardly likeable. Good! Like some of our best female actors, Bourne is brilliant at creating 'unlikeable' female characters who you root for despite, or perhaps because, of them being complex, spiky and angry - and, because of a traumatic experience at the hands of an ex, April is not so much angry as incandescent with rage. Apart from joining a women's boxing class, one of the ways she chooses to tackle her trauma is to become 'Gretel,' the 'Cool Girl' we all recognise from Zooey Deschanel movies, or 'Manic Pixie Dream Girl Next Door Slut With No Problems' (another phrase I'm stealing) - but is that actually what her new boyfriend, her flatmate or anyone wants? Well done to Holly Bourne for another cracking read.

'Pretending' hit me hard. I don't have any experience of rape or PTSD from an abusive relationship, but I had never stopped to think about what it must be like to have experienced it and move on from it. It turns out, its hard, painful and full of issues that you wouldn't even think of as an outsider.

Holly Bourne takes on this sensitive topic with a brutal honesty; April really can't move on from a abusive relationship, despite putting the years between herself and the incident. She cries, she is angry and destructive, she doesn't trust herself, and most of all, she doesn't trust any man. So she takes on a new fake persona of Gretel, who starts dating and then it all starts to take a turn....

Perhaps what I enjoyed most about this book was Holly's normalisation of therapy and getting help. She writes about exercise therapy classes, support groups full of women ready to take back their lives and, most importantly, details the pivotal moments when April realises that she does need counselling. So many people go through that realisation every day, and it feels so daunting to finally admit that you need help. This book reinforced to me that my own decision to go to counselling was the right one, albeit for completely different reasons to Aprils'.

I really enjoyed the characterisation of April and her date Joshua - he is gentle, calm and everything that is right about humanity. But most of all I really loved getting to know the friendship between April and her housemate Megan - everyone needs a friendship built on acceptance and love like they have.

Pretending by Holly Bourne is set around April, a 30-something woman who has gotten away from an abusive relationship and is now looking for love.
So far, so warm and fluffy, you can see a string of hilarious dating mishaps coming before April finally finds the one and lives happily ever after, right?
Wrong!
April is fed up of being taken for granted, having to take up less space, be more appeasing and having to "smile more". Her past trauma, never far away, resurfaces and she decides to reinvent herself as Gretel and be the woman she could have been if her life had gone the way it was supposed to, while possibly treating some men as badly as they have treated her. Late, disrespectful, uninterested, selfish. April is angry and Gretel is her weapon against all men (and yes, she knows NOT ALL MEN, but why is it all the ones she meets?)

The book seems to set out on the well trodden path of being about a young woman living in London, having comedic adventures while she patiently waits for the one to rescue her, however, it has a strong feminist backbone and the message of sisterhood is clear.

The book is warm and funny, but doesn't shy away from issues of rape and trauma. I felt the topic of April's previous abusive relationship and rape within that relationship was sensitively addressed, without melodrama and histrionics. The description of the physical and mental trauma left behind by that felt genuine, as did the conversations about access to mental health services held by the members of April's boxing class for survivors. I applaud Holly Bourne for the veracity of her writing on this in the book.

There are a LOT of women who will read this book (myself included) who will recognise themselves and their own relationships in this book, and will have a wry smile or eye roll depending where they are on the relationship spectrum.

This book might get lumped into the "chick-lit" category but it's really so much more than that, it should be on the national sex and relationships curriculum, and men should have to read it too. And then, finally, we can agree it's NOT ALL MEN and it's NOT ALL WOMEN.

A sincere thank you to the publisher, author and Netgalley for providing me an ebook copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

I wanted so badly to like this book but I just didn’t. The main character was just so obsessed with herself. It was just a bit far-fetched for me.

Oh my goodness! This book is so intense.

Holly Bourne’s books are always hard hitting and emotional and this one continues the themes of some of her recent YA fiction, The Places I’ve I’ve Cried in Public.

April’s feelings are so raw and honest there were points when I had to put this book down and have a break from reading.

April’s previous relationship was abusive and traumatic and she is struggling to deal with the impact on her mental health.

The relationships in the book are complicated but common. It will leave you thinking about how to support and protect your girl friends.

Despite the issues and emotions, there is a lot of love and humour in the book. I want to be friends with April and Megan and eat ice lollies and watch re-runs of Dawson’s Creek with them. These are real people and one of Holly Bourne’s strengths is her ability to write wonderfully real characters.

I will definitely be recommending this book but it absolutely comes with a trigger warning. ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Thank you Netgalley for the advanced copy of Pretending in return for an honest review.