Due to a sudden, unexpected passing in the family a few years ago and another more recently and my subsequent (mental) health issues stemming from that, I was unable to download this book in time to review it before it was archived as I did not visit this site for several years after the bereavements. This meant I didn't read or venture onto netgalley for years as not only did it remind me of that person as they shared my passion for reading, but I also struggled to maintain interest in anything due to overwhelming depression. I was therefore unable to download this title in time and so I couldn't give a review as it wasn't successfully acquired before it was archived. The second issue that has happened with some of my other books is that I had them downloaded to one particular device and said device is now defunct, so I have no access to those books anymore, sadly.

This means I can't leave an accurate reflection of my feelings towards the book as I am unable to read it now and so I am leaving a message of explanation instead. I am now back to reading and reviewing full time as once considerable time had passed I have found that books have been helping me significantly in terms of my mindset and mental health - this was after having no interest in anything for quite a number of years after the passings. Anything requested and approved will be read and a review written and posted to Amazon (where I am a Hall of Famer & Top Reviewer), Goodreads (where I have several thousand friends and the same amount who follow my reviews) and Waterstones (or Barnes & Noble if the publisher is American based). Thank you for the opportunity and apologies for the inconvenience.

“She knew that no matter how you self-identify ultimately, chances are that you succumb to becoming what the world treats you as.”

Detransition, Baby is a novel based around relationships and family dynamics and how it can come to be in the hardest of ways. Reece is a transgender women who has found everything she thought she wanted in a relationship with her girlfriend Amy. For Amy though, things are tough and she does not feel as comfortable as she hoped as a woman so she detransitions back into Ames. This is something that cannot keep their relationship going so they split. As we go straight into the story, we meet Katrina who is Ames’ boss and has had an affair with and becomes pregnant. Enter the triad family dynamic as Ames wants Reece to help raise their child.
Told over two timelines of before and after conception, we get to know Reece and Amy and then Reece and Ames as they navigate their way through their complicated lives.
Whilst it is hard to read in places due to the injustice that Trans people live with with so many lives at stake, the story has definitely opened my eyes into the way people live, how motherhood can happen with limited options and what Trans folk have to do to survive.
TW: transitioning/detransitioning, pregnancy/fertility/infertility, miscarriage, gender dynamics, domestic abuse, body dysmorphia, adoption, HIV and suicide.
Overall, a brilliant debut but I did find myself struggling in some areas to stick with the flow of the story. I would find myself tripping over some of the words and would have to reread a few times to fully understand what was being said and in some places I still couldn’t understand and felt like it took me away from the story.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for gifting me a copy in exchange for an honest review.

Detransition Baby is a beautifully written character study discussing parenthood, family and queer identity.

I really enjoyed the nuanced portrayal of the characters not shying away from the messiness of relationships and gender identity that they struggle with.

It was a beautiful, funny and heartwarming story and we need more books like this which explore trans and queer identity.

A really interesting and thought provoking book around the topics of sex, gender, motherhood and family.
I know I’ll be thinking about this for days to come.
4 stars.

Just outstandingly good. A well-deserved place on the Women’s Prize longlist. I hope it makes the shortlist too. Brilliant.

This was suuuch a good read. It was funny, thought provoking, sexy and hooked me from the very start. Very timely, provocative and important novel.

started this book and absolutely loved it, i couldnt put it down as i was so entranced by this world of gender and its limitless nature. a truly fascinating read

Reese and Amy had a wonderful relationship and a life that was as close to perfect as two transgender women could possibly dream of. Then Amy detransitioned, became Ames and he and Reese split up. Now Ames is calling on Reese again. He has got his boss Katrina pregnant and is wondering if the three of them could possibly raise the baby together. This unique, beautiful novel provides fantastic commentary on the fluidity of gender, while providing a singular reflection on motherhood and what that really means. The relationships between all three of the main characters is fascinatingly complex and realistic. An original family story with plenty of wit and heartache

This book was sent to me as an ARC on NetGalley. However all opinions are of my own.
TW for all types of abuse, misogyny, miscarriages, transphobic and hate crime.
I have very mixed feelings about this - it’s a very polarising book and it will indeed be relatable in some sense. Most parts are uncomfortable whilst unbearably true. One thing I really enjoyed about this book was how open and honest it was. It took me back, this is the first book I have read about transgender and I think it has opened my eyes and help me understand a lot more, although I’m still very uneducated on this topic. On the other hand, there were descriptions which made me feel uncomfortable and not because I’m a ‘prude’, but because of the sheer fact of brutal ness. I do think this book is educating and could be somewhat useful to those who are maybe struggling.

Funny, sexy, sad, and so smart it hurts. An enormously generous, capacious novel that is also extremelytraditionally narratively satisfying in a way that I often miss in contemporary lit by and about millennial women - I devoured it in a day and strongly suggest you do the same.

As this book largely explores subjects such as the difference between ‘being’ and ‘doing’ Trans, Queer families and motherhood, I feel I shouldn’t comment on these matters, as a cisgendered straight woman.

This book is fascinating and smart, and definitely made me think and become a lot more aware of issues within the Trans community. It’s not a plot-driven novel as such: there is one, but the book itself flips between past and present, conjuring up the histories that make Ames and Reese the way they are when we meet them in the book. This is great, though at times things feel a bit too ‘gender theory’ heavy, in terms of being dumped into the book as though sections of non-fiction have been pasted into the text. There are also times when I would have liked a quicker pace and perhaps fewer characters as sometimes we meet people, assume they are going to be important, and then disappear completely.

That all sounds really harsh! But honestly, Peters’ book is incredible and an excellent, worthwhile read. I do recommend!

I spent a lot of time reading this book wondering if I should even get to have an opinion about it. After all, I am cisgendered and this story is quite a provocative one about people who are trans. In fact, I felt very uncomfortable reading it until I could confirm that this is an Own Voices novel (the writer is a trans woman).

I feel like rather than sharing my review about this book, I would love to read a whole bunch of perspectives from people who are themselves trans about what they thought about this story and if/how it resonated with them. Hopefully, I can find some of their reviews here on Goodreads.

This is such a complicated one to review. There's so much to love about it. The words 'whip-smart' have been thrown around in just about every single review of this one, and the more annoying thing is that it's true. Peters is a fantastic writer, with an ability to write characters who really do feel like you could bump into them in the street; I half expected to turn around and see Reese and Ames in the room with me as I read. I can see why this book has garnered the hype and the praise that it has; it's utterly unlike anything else out there (although there are some similarities with Imogen Binnie's Nevada in terms of how trans womanhood is dissected) and it's that rare book which manages to be a fast read without sacrificing its depth. It's absolutely going to end up on every awards list going, and it should. Peters is that enviable sort of writer whose shopping lists are probably works of art.

There were things I disliked about it, primarily Peters' habit of introducing far too many characters, giving us an in-depth description of their relationship to the protagonists and their backstory, and then never mentioning them again. We'd get 80% into the book and then discover that, actually, Reese has a best friend she relies on entirely, even though she's never been mentioned before. This habit of throwaway characters became irritating to the point that I stopped focusing on them at all, and then found myself confused on the rare occasion they were brought up later. I think an editor should probably have convinced Peter to kill more of her darlings. Peters also never misses an opportunity, however fleeting, to make her characters the mouthpieces for quite extensive gender theory, usually in the form of one character monologuing about niche gender expressions or expectations in dialogue with another. This flitted between seeming authentic, on the count that these characters clearly have a hat in that particular ring and therefore would obviously think about it a lot, to being quite obviously a chance for the author to convey a lot of theory within the narrative, and therefore not really much more than exposition. These moments made the characters feel less authentic, and considering that the authenticity of the characters was one of the things I loved most about it, it almost disappointed me to have the veil pierced like that.

This book could have very easily been streamlined. That said, its debut messiness is a large part of its charm. For its faults, it's a book that'll percolate in my brain for a good long while, and I'm eagerly awaiting whatever Torrey Peters writes next.

This novel is A-MA-ZING.

I will say at the beginning that this story is not plot driven - if you need that to enjoy a book, this one might not be the one for you.

But this book IS for you, if you like a messy, character-driven novel that rips open head and heart of every character in it to present to the reader in all its gore and glory.

The result of 352 pages of exactly that is the most beautiful portrait on gender, queerness, and motherhood.

It's a portrait that definitely does not put the characters in their most flattering light - but exactly this messyness, this realness is what makes Detransition, Baby one of my favourite reads in 2021. Like, I am writing this in January 2021 and I already know it will be one of my favourites of the year. THAT'S how good it is.

I have never encountered a piece if fiction before that gives this much depth and self awareness to its main characters. The way they are commenting on their own actions, the people around them, and society as a whole is mindblowing.

I am not kidding when I say that I felt my mind shift while reading this book.

Well, I can see why Detransition, Baby is getting a lot of buzz. It's a timely, provocative read that never shies away from the tough subjects. The writing was not always my cup of tea - more on that in a second - and I think it has some of that chaotic messiness that seems to be characteristic of a lot of debut novelists, but excuse me while I use a cliche marketing term and say: Peters seems like one to watch.

This is a not a plot-driven novel; it is a detailed character study of two trans women. Reese, who is navigating her way through a series of bad relationships, while all she really wants is a chance to become a mother, and her ex Amy/Ames, a now detransitioned trans woman who just found out (s)he got another woman pregnant and is uncomfortable with the term "father".

It explores a lot of Reese and Amy's pasts and presents, through their relationships, their sexualities and sex lives, and their innermost thoughts and fears, mainly about womanhood and motherhood. I felt that some of the writing was indulgent, and thought Roxane Gay summed it up well in her review.

There are a number of examples I could use, such as:

The butcher-block craftsmanship became for Reese an absurd-but-serious mental marker of a female bourgeois heterosexual temporality forever beyond her envious grasp: When a woman reaches a certain point in her thirties, she looks around and finds a good dining set with which to settle down.

Reese is a veteran of the horrific social gore that results when individuals fight personal battles with unnecessarily political weaponry on a queer battlefield mined with hypersensitive explosives.


The author sometimes gets a bit carried away with her adjectives and adverbs, in my opinion. There is also one part of the book where Ames attempts to use South African elephants as an analogy to explain his/her feelings and it goes on for several very long pages.

Still, I took a lot from this book. I didn't know, for example, that "transgender" is an umbrella term the CDC came up with when they were categorizing people with HIV. Peters' preferred term throughout is simply trans, or transsexual where appropriate. I was also surprised by Amy/Ames' comments on autogynephilia, which I always took to be a transphobic label. Here, (s)he defends it in a way, prompting me to go do a bit of outside reading on the subject (though I did have to roll my eyes when Amy/Ames cites porn as evidence of what cis women want sexually, lol).

I saw some reviews complaining about unlikable characters, and they are, to be fair. They are unlikable in the way any truly complex, flawed character is unlikable. Some of their thoughts are discomfiting, especially their internalized misogyny, though I mostly felt compassion towards them. I do wish more time - and more of a challenge, honestly - had been given to some of Reese's unhealthy views on womanhood.

Detransition, Baby gave me a lot to think about. Some people said it was funny, which I didn't get, and sexy, which I also didn't see. There was certainly a lot of graphic sex, but most of it struck me as depressing-- either a response to hurt, or else a seeking of it.

Amy, who had almost no genital dysphoria, was happy to put Reese on her knees or fuck Reese in the mornings-- the kind of vanilla affirmations that Reese needed.


Rather, I found it a moving character portrait of two very complicated and fascinating people. I have questions still-- such as why the fuck Ames would ever think it appropriate to invite Reese to be a second mum to his/her unborn baby without first consulting the mother actually carrying the child --but I guess these are minor(?) points.

I hope Peters writes more.

Warnings for transphobia, misogyny, suicide, HIV/AIDs phobia, abuse, and abortion.

What a brilliant book to start 2021!

Detransition, Baby is frequently sharp, sometimes painful and often surprisingly funny. The writing is smart and the humour wry, reflecting the characters' cynicism. When that cynicism is shed, we uncover the emotion underneath, whether profound or painful.

Peters has written a book about gender and sex, love and lust, and about facing emotions (or avoiding them). It is also about family, in the many ways a family can be constructed or imagined.

I can honestly say I've never read anything like this, and I think this book provides an essential and fascinating account of what it means in today's culture to be queer. The central figures all have complicated and confusing relationships with gender and this feels so accurate to me; gender isn't a clear-cut thing and all of us, whether we are aware of it or not, will find ways in which we contradict the supposed attributes and characteristics of our apparent genders.
The plot of this novel centers around the three main characters (Reese, Ames and Katrina) and their desires, and struggles, of having a child together. I enjoyed the modern take on family that this presents, and how it exposes the arbitrary way in which the world is set up to enable the nuclear family whilst discouraging all other variants of family. Even though the characters don't reach the 'solution' to this generational problem, their discussions pave a way for other discussions on the idea of family, and how the 'normal' equation of one mother plus one father equals the perfect family is in fact one type of family among many.
I also was fascinated by the commentary of gender, especially through the character of Ames. Ames previously lived as a trans woman, Amy, before detransitioning. And yet, Ames can no longer think of himself as a cis man, and still has undeniable elements of queerness and womanhood in his masculine life. This reveals the problems that occur when we, as a society, tie our gender identity so closely to our physical sex. The binary of male versus female is exposed as woefully inadequate to accommodate for the vast array of gender identities. This book is not intending to offer a solution to this problem, but it blows open the discussion on gender and family in a very interesting and illuminating way.

I enjoyed the book but still have a lot of questions. I think it brings up loads of issues and questions about transition de transition and gender.
I'm not qualified to answer any of these but I enjoyed the insights into other lives.
I think it's an important book I haven't read anything else like this.

🌿BOOK REVIEW🌿

Detransition, Baby by Torrey Peters

🌼🌼🌼🌼/5

TW// abuse (domestic, child, emotional, sexual, physical), hate crime, misogyny, deadnaming, transphobia, miscarriage

This story follows the life of three different women who have all experienced their own trauma. Reece is a trans woman living in NYC with an enjoyable life, she meets Amy who is also trans and they build a life together. Amy decided to detransition and become Ames and has since found love with his boss Katrina. Katrina has fallen pregnant and isn’t sure whether she wants to keep the baby and when she confides in Ames, he reveals his past. After coming to terms with the new information, Ames and Katrina agree to raise their baby as a new, unconventional family unit with Reece.

This book is a masterpiece and I have been struggling to distill all of my thoughts into one review. It covers the deep rooted transphobia present in our society and the challenges faced by trans men and women. Along with this it explores gender in the most painful way. Nothing in this book is stigmatised or romanticised, it is completely candid.

It is such a heavy book but there are also moments written in such a funny way that hell to break up this hard hitting story.

There are so many difficult questions raised in this book and none have easy answers to them. I thought this book covered detransition in such an emphatic way, showing that Amy’s life as a trans woman was not a mistake and it highlights how difficult it is to be queer. The book highlights that although Ames is living as a man, they are still a trans women.

I’m sorry this is such a rambling review, it is such an impactful book and I am still processing it! I highly recommend this one💖

i don't think i've read a book so painfully and almost resentfully open to nuance and difficulty, which of course, i adored - at every turn, detransition, baby rejects the chance to go soft, go easy. instead, it goes pretty fucking hard for 350 pages. i can't help but deeply admire and love a book that so prioritises the coexistence of bitchiness and tenderness, especially when its so concerned with (ugh, not to be like, 'this book is so important') such essential and complex questions. it cracked me open! i can't wait for everyone to read it - it started a thousand questions inside of me, made me laugh and made me cry - i want to discuss this book with everyone i know. it's pointy and dense and fun, destined to hit a thousand raw nerves. so excited to follow torrey peters down any road she wants to take me down.

thank you to netgalley for this free arc!