Cover Image: An Effort to Understand

An Effort to Understand

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Member Reviews

We could all stand to be better communicators and David Murray shares a lot of helpful insight into communication and how we can improve. This is really geared toward those who live in the United States, as there are a lot of cultural references that wouldn't apply to anyone who lived somewhere else, but I think many of the ideas Murray writes about are universal. *Advance copy provided by the publisher in exchange for my honest review.

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I like this kind of book. It's full of seemingly common-sense wisdom that isn't so common. It's full of lots of stories some of which provide lessons and some of which simply made me think or smile. This book is like reading a "Everything I needed to know I learned in Kindergarten" type book. A light easy read, perfect reading bit by bit out on the back porch or before heading to sleep. It just feels right, like your favorite blue jeans or an old pair of slippers.

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I really love the message that we have more in common and are closer together than we are far apart. This book allows us to see how we have different views but comes to the real conclusion that we are more alike than we think. Great read. Very helpful when you feel jaded.

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I really loved the premise of this book: to forge new pathways for Americans on opposite sides of the political spectrum to come together, converse, and unite towards a better tomorrow. However, the execution was lacking. There was a heavy emphasis on unpacking the political significance of Trump supporters, many meandering ancedotes, as well as a lack of focus on how the strategies he presents can be applied in the real world. Love the sentiment, but needs refinement.

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“We have to make an effort in the United States,” a trembling Robert F. Kennedy told a grief-stricken crowd immediately after the assassination of Martin Luther King. “We have to make an effort to understand.” A half-century later, how are we doing in our effort to understand? We’ve had so many “national conversations about race,” we are blue in the face. Online discussions instantly devolve into attempted rhetorical murder. People dread their family holiday dinners and exchange tips on how to avoid controversial—read, meaningful—subjects. As the nation staggers from one of the most contentious presidential elections in its history to the next, it seems communication can’t solve anything. David Murray hasn't given up.

Murray is the author of the memoir Raised by Mad Men, about his 1960s-era advertising parents. Murray has spent his whole career at the center of a community of professional communicators, writing on political, business and personal communication for three decades. In An Effort to Understand, Murray shares his insights—challenging, entertaining, funny and often intensely personal—to help Americans communicate more effectively with the people they love, the people they work with and even the friends and strangers who they confront from across the political divide. But first: with themselves.

Through observational examples from contemporary culture and his personal life, Murray shows you:
• How to listen more carefully.
• How to choose battles more wisely.
• How to avoid insulting people accidentally.
• How to think more generously.
• How to argue more productively.
• How to repair a relationship (and when to stop trying).
• How to use humor as a salve and not a hammer.
• How to make more peace in your life, and contribute to a more cohesive family, community, workplace and society.

It is an accessible, thought-provoking and timely read and one I feel is filled with tips that would be beneficial to everyone. Above all, it calls for compassion, empathy and understanding in a world that appears to be sorely and severely lacking all three. As Robert Kennedy said in his speech the last time America was so wounded, “What we need in the United States is not division; what we need in the United States is not hatred; what we need in the United States is not violence or lawlessness; but love and wisdom, and compassion toward one another, and a feeling of justice toward those who still suffer within our country.” This book is an attempt to help us treat one another the way we all know we must. This book is An Effort to Understand.

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The author has presented a perspective that is insightful, as it encourages the thought that communication is more than a means of persuasion. That is, author champions using communication as a way of thinking productively.

With the current situation in this country, this is a book whose ideas deserve, at the very least, contemplation. Will it be a quick fix? I doubt it. The reason: for humans, change is a process. However, the thoughts written in this book present an opportunity to reconsider how we are communicating and what areas need revamping.

Consider not only purchasing a copy for personal use, but also getting one for your most challenging communication partner. It would even make a great book club selection and the discussion that follows will be both instructive and productive.

I voluntarily reviewed a copy of this book provided by the publisher and Net Galley but the thoughts expressed are my own.

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An Effort To Understand by David Murray is a collection of essays about communication with others. This book includes essays from "the philosophical to the professional to the political to the social to the personal." Murray gives his thoughts regarding understanding others in every walk of life. I really feel like this book was rather unnecessary since the author could have just said that the key to understanding others is really as simple as listening and giving one's undivided attention to people when they are speaking. Thanks to NetGalley for the free digital review copy. All opinions are my own.

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This book was perfectly titled because it was "an effort to understand" two hundred and twenty five pages of of very boring opinions and insights. The book centers heavily on when you cannot understand or accept someone else's point of view and still remain civil and or friendly. WAY WAY WAY TOO MUCH discussion about Trump supporters of all kinds. I am registered as an independent voter because I like to see both of sides of the political spectrum, but I am soured by Trump's presidency as a whole. He used the presidency as a status symbol and not the highest government position anyone can hold. Plus all the violence because of him. So much toxic behavior, toxic violence for four years.

This book was just a no as a while. No practical advice. Do not bother.

All thoughts and opinions are my own. Thanks to Netgalley, David Murray and Independent Book Publishers Association Member Titles for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Available: 3/2/21

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This is a series of essays loosely connected into a book about communication and overcoming social barriers in the titular effort to understand one another. Engagingly told and amply supported by anecdotes both personal and historical, this book has a lot to offer, from beautiful prose to good advice. While I certainly appreciated that, and had a decent time reading, I also had a lot of issues with it. Some opinions are presented as applying more universally than they actually do, the author uses he or she instead of saying they which is not only briefer but more inclusive, and is rather disconnected or old-fashioned on a few issues for a book to be published in 2021, such as saying “At this writing, a Mr. PewDiePie is the most popular YouTuber in the world, with 102 million subscribers. Have you heard of him?” and “But YouTube videos do not strong, powerful women make.” The political aspects had a bit of both-sides-ing at times which considering recent events comes across as somewhat tone deaf. Further, the author’s comparison between his previous more ruthless writing style and his current supposedly more empathetic one and grounding it in the current political climate is a bit odd, since only caring about or understanding something you yourself have experienced is a pretty narrow scope of empathy in my view. Maybe it is because I am in my early 20s, but I just couldn’t connect with this book as much as I wanted to, despite a good few incredibly funny and poignant chapters.

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"An Effort to Understand", by David Murray, speaks to the problems Americans have today of listening to those who differ from us. By sharing personal anecdotes and historical quotes, Murray seeks to convince his readers to understand why others may have different opinions than we do. I felt that the book was fairly helpful, but didn't offer much practical advice. Also, the author spent too much time maligning Trump and his supporters.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC. All opinions are my own.

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For a guy who is allegedly an expert on speechifying, this book is only very very very boring. I would strongly urge you to skip this book rather than waste your time wading through it.

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A political book that tries to help me understand other perspectives which is something we could use right around now. I highly enjoyed this intelligent read and you will too

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I love this book.
I am neither an American nor residing in America but I too know all too well what discord is and when politics divides people, in Kenya we had post-election violence and lost so many people in a span of a year, and the healing is something we are barely scratching the surface of, since 2007.
The timing of this book is perfect, and with living online now that we are physically distanced, it seems like we speak over each other, over each like, retweet, comment, share...anything to have the last word but never the peaceful word.
My favorite part of this book was reading on civility. Thanks Netgalley for the eARC, I would definitely recommend this to anyone interested in communication and how to speak and listen and grow from a conversation.

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