I get the idea of this book, and I felt drawn I to see how it ended. But it just didn't work for me. Tremmy is supposed to be changed by his terminal illness and looking to change his friend's. But in reality, I felt irritated throughout. It was well written so maybe just not for me.

Wow! I’ve never read a book like this, and from reading the description I was curious however never expected it to be as hard hitting as it actually was. It makes you think and feel a lot and all for the right reasons.
The book counts down the days to Tremmys death (of cancer) and is almost like a diary showing you everything he learns, reflects and regrets in his final months. It’s an impressive and mind blowing book. This book really sucks you in to the story and makes you read on, the ending was beautifully handled and it will definitely be a book which stays with me for a fair while!
Michael F Stewart did a beautiful job!

WOW! Difficult, scary but SO important!
Rich and privileged boys in a private boarding school. All jerks. And one of them is dying.



Tremmy just found out he has a brain tumor and has only 4 to 6 months left. But like Tremmy says:
‘A minefield exists between now and a natural death. Blindness, incontinence, seizures, dementia, pain, pain, pain.’



So he wants to opt for medical assistance in dying (euthanasia) <i>if</i> he starts crapping his pants. But he’s only 17, and therefore euthanasia isn’t possible.



My teens (just 18 and 15) were shocked when I told them they live in the only country in the world (the Netherlands) where 16/17 yo’s can make that choice. On their own! 12-16 yo’s can with their parent’s consent (in Belgium euthanasia is possible for all ages, minors with their parent’s consent). As a parent myself, I know this is a difficult and scary topic to talk about, but at the same time, so important. Because teens who are dying need that small part of self-control. And they themselves know when enough is enough.



This story is about death, talking about death, overcoming the fear of death, discussing euthanasia. But it’s more. It’s not a sweet and gooey story like many other YA’s about sick teens. It’s tough and harsh, and heartbreaking, and hopefully at the same time. At first, I didn’t even know if I liked it. Because who likes boys who are misogynists and bullies going to a scary private boarding school for the rich in a frightening world where people have drones (fireflies) that can eavesdrop? I didn’t. I frowned at Tremmy’s actions, and I hated Jenkins because he was the worst of all. But at the same time, the writing was so engaging that I couldn’t stop reading (except for the crying fits, sometimes I just couldn’t stop those tears falling). And Tremmy changed, realizing most of the kids at his ‘wonderful’ privileged private school were jerks:
‘Even though I know he’s making a dumb joke, something in the ease with which it slides out of his mouth is very wrong.’

Read the trigger warnings! Be prepared when you start reading this book! And put it on hold when it’s too much! I did too. I spent the last 20 percent of the story sobbing. I put it down, picked it up, and put it down again.

This can be considered YA (the author already indicated it’s 16+), but I don’t think it is. It’s more a crossover between YA and adult and definitely a good book for parents too.

I'm not quite sure what to rate this book. There are some heavy topics (which the author graciously warned about us before diving in) and I didn't realize it had a touch of a sci-fi/set in the future vibe (though it's done well and isn't distracting to the overall story). It's also very philosophical in places but teenager boy crude in others. Overall, I think I liked it but I'm also thinking I'm not the target demographic for this novel.

Kindly received an ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.