Cover Image: Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome

Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome

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Member Reviews

I’ve laughed out loud and underlined entire passages while reading L.J. Traffords’s, “Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome,” an exceptionally explicit adult-themed nonfiction history of the more prurient aspects of Italy two thousand years ago. The book covers Roman language at the turn of the first millennium; looks at centuries of their morality laws; examines character and appearance ideals for both men and women; provides extensive examples from Publius Ovid Naso (Ovid) on where to find and how to attract a lover.

Trafford isn’t shy in this book, so be prepared to learn lots about ancient Roman’s picturesque carnal pass times. We learn that Romans eagerly talked and gossiped about their amours, even when the act itself wasn’t especially satisfying. One such complainer, Pliny the Elder, whose love life clearly wasn’t terrific, is quoted: ‘All other animals derive satisfaction from having mated; man gets almost none.’ Worry not, there are many more stories and antidotes discussed in this comprehensive reference that will raise your eyebrows, cause your head to shake, and keep you laughing all while educating you on Romans who definitely disagree with Pliny.

TheBookMaven graciously thanks NetGalley, Author L.J. Trafford and Publisher Pen & Sword History for this Advanced Reader’s Copy (ARC) for review.

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When you think of Ancient Rome, what often comes to mind is debauchery coupled with almost puritanical morals. Orgies. Vestal Virgins. Nero and Caligula. You know, the juicy stuff that peppered both HBO and PBS.

But what was the truth? Is it closer to the sex fueled fantasies of 1970s x-rated films and pearl clutching Christian saints? Or is it the dry and politics heavy shenanigans of I, Claudius.

The truth is amusingly revealed in this really fun historical quick-read by LJ Trafford.

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First off, I need to level with you. I got this book because of the cover. This is one of my favorite paintings in the history of ever (Lorenzo Lotto’s Venus and Cupid) and every time I go to the MET in NYC I have to spend some time communing with it. It’s just that bonkers and fun and faboo. (I have a thing for odd Renaissance and Medieval art.)

So I should have been clued in that by selecting this picture the book itself is also just as fun and whimsical as the painting, and like the painting there is a whole lot more going on when you scratch the surface. Using primary sources of the day, Trafford explains that like many cultures and civilizations that there was nuance and hypocrisy when it came to Ancient Roman views on sex and sexuality. And that like many ancient (and let’s face it, modern) civilizations that the expectations differed between classes and genders.

The book is written in an amazingly readable format, and I often found myself laughing out loud at several turns of phrase. I managed to read this book while undergoing treatment for two different kinds of cancer and it was just the distraction I needed. The author was a tour guide in a previous life and it shows. The way the history and primary resources are presented are geared for a lay audience who wants to learn more after binging HBO’s Rome or Masterpiece Theater’s I, Claudius.

Readers do need to be aware that there is a lot of swear words, but this shouldn’t be surprising considering the graffiti that has survived from the period. It can be shocking if you think of Rome as a bunch of stuffy senators and pearl-clutching early Christians. But Rome is/was a very earthy and messy place (often literally) and this book doesn’t shy away from that.

I honestly enjoyed it.

Five Stars.

I received an ARC via NetGalley.

**Review delayed due to cancer.

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This nonfiction book focuses on the intimate lives of Ancient Rome. I found this book to be hard to read for it was very dry. The setting was fascinating but not the subject. Still, I recommend this for anyone interested in Roman history.

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Good for a starting look in this area of Rome to looking at sexuality through time. A few different topics looked at - for both men and women.

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What can I say - I was more than surprised by the level of detail the author provided about the ways Romans viewed sex. It was enlightening to learn about how they viewed sex and how it impacted their everyday lives. I would recommend it.

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A very thorough, in-depth study regarding what we can know about Roman views on sex and sexuality from literary and archaeological sources.

The author explores every facet of sexuality: general attitudes, history and development, the male perspective, female perspective, slaves, expressions of sexuality, divorce, adultery, and analysis of the claims regarding the sexual proclivities of various emperors.

The book has many valuable insights. Understanding Roman sexuality in terms of penetrator vs. penetrated, and the hierarchy of shame in what was penetrated (least to most, vagina, anus, mouth) is essential for the many discussions about sex as it relates in that culture and that time. The same sex sexuality discussion was interesting: the author does show that for men there wasn't really a same sex relationship culture, but there were some instances of lesbian relationships at the time, which more likely speaks to power dynamics than anything else. And, of course, the importance of remembering the likely continual sexual exploitation of both genders by their masters.

Important reading for understanding Roman times.

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I read this ARC for an honest review
All thoughts and opinions are mine

Well researched, informative and entertaining read

A great read

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Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome, by LJ Trafford, is a breezy, mostly informative look at sexual practices in the old Empire, though Trafford probably casts a broader net than some might expect from the title. While we certainly get a lot of sex (what was with all those penises on the walls, what were the rules about adultery, what was a “perfect penis”), Trafford also delves into areas such as body hair, perfume, love potions, and more. I appreciated the wide-ranging approach as many of the topics are more interesting than the clichéd “Roman orgy” or the oft-cited “debauchery” of its rulers (some were, some were not). Though I should note that not being wholly ignorant of her audience, Trafford does end with a chapter entitled “The Sex Life of Emperors.”

Some of the other topics covered include cosmetics, circumcision, eunuchs, marriage laws, contraception, abortion, and “anatomy.” That last in air quotes as we should just say that they didn’t get much right in that field. See “wandering womb”

Trafford has an engaging, often witty voice, and clearly knows her classical sources. Mostly she’s good about the necessary caveats about extremely limited sources, writers with agendas, the problems of sources writing about people or events years or decades (or more) in the past, and the overall lack of, shall we say, a firm commitment to truth/reality. She also does what I wish more other writers did when writing of historical time periods and their “extreme” laws; she points out how rarely those extreme consequences were actually applied. That said, there were a few times I felt she took some of the sources a bit too much at face value, though I certainly don’t hold myself up as a great judge given the discrepancy in our knowledge of the time.

If you read casually in this area (or read well-sourced historical fiction set in this time period), some of this will be familiar—the clothing for instance, the Vestal Virgins, the different rules for men and women, the young marriages. But Trafford offers up some fascinating lesser-known information, such as rites of passage; this isn’t just a rehash of well-trod territory for the person with a lay interest. The book is also nicely enhanced by a collection of illustrations.

Trafford makes for a fun tour guide, and the book makes for a good introduction to the topic without falling into the pitfalls of being too narrowly focused or pandering to too salacious an audience. Recommended.

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It was an informative, compelling and entertaining read that made me learned something new about Ancient Rome.
The author delivers a well researched and well written book, I appreciated the part about the moral models.
Highly recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this ARC, all opinions are mine

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A fascinating read. It covers every nook and corner of ancient Roman sexuality and morality and weird and ludicrous tales of depraved emperors and empresses.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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Engaging riveting historical look at sex and sexuality in Ancient Rome. A very well written book with lots of intriguing information. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

*Thanks to Pen & Sword History & NetGalley for this Ebook in exchange for my honest review

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An entertainingly written and clearly well-researched book, this tells you all you ever wanted to know about sex lives in ancient Rome, including things you hadn't thought to ask. The book starts with a warning I'd repeat: if you are easily offended/squeamish/sensitive about discussing any kind of sexual matter bluntly, put the book down. Because, as Trafford shows us, the Romans considered sex something (usually) natural, with nothing private about private parts, and the sheer number of words they had to describe acts lets you know they talked about sex bluntly. From what made a person attractive to what was considered normal sexual behavior (with plenty of gossip from ancient historians about those they claimed enjoyed sexual behaviors that were rather abnormal); from love potions to health matters, actors and prostitutes to Senators and emperors, it is all here. Trafford does a good job at reminding us when ancient sources should be considered reliable, unreliable, and conducting smear campaigns as well as bringing in archaeological finds to back up statements when possible.

Witty and clever, entertaining and informative, this is a great book for anyone interested in ancient Rome or sexuality throughout history.

I received an ARC of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

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Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome is an engaging and well written look at sexual mores and behaviour in ancient Rome presented by L. J. Trafford. Due out later in 2021 from Pen & Sword History, it's 192 pages and will be available in paperback and ebook formats.

This is a truly fascinating deep dive into the extant historical, cultural, and legal records from the Ancient world, chiefly Rome with brief forays into Greece, Africa, and other lands, partially in order to contrast the overwhelmingly male dominated Roman cultural mores of the time. The author is a capable tour guide and explains the vast differences in an accessible manner. Due to the paucity of surviving first person references, the necessary extrapolations she makes from secondary references and inferences are as carefully built up and reasonable as she can make them.

This is not a titillating book; there's little at which to thrill or gawp. Instead, it's a fascinating glimpse into a long vanished culture as foreign and odd to modern westerners as can be imagined. The information is gathered into chapters by theme: morality, the culture for men, women, eunuchs, beauty & fashion, frustration & infidelity, function & dysfunction, religious significance, adultery, homosexuality, undesirable liasons, imagery and cultural references, and the ruling classes (who pretty much had their own rules).

Although the book is well annotated throughout, the author has a light and humorous style and I found myself grinning often and even chuckling a few times at her witty repartee. Many of the rules, laws, and rigid cultural mores are/were quite bizarre and ridiculous to us (from our long distant viewpoint). She also does a good job of summoning compassion and pathos for the plight of slaves, freedmen, and women, most of whom had very very little (or no) control over their situations or lives.

The book mentions, but isn't overwhelmed by infamous historical characters (Caligula, Commodus, Nero, and others). In fact the author expends much effort visualising the everyday Romans who weren't writ large on the pages of history. It's copiously annotated throughout and the chapter notes and bibliography will provide readers many hours of background. There are also a number of photographs showing sculptures and artistic representations of many of the principal players as well as modern archaeological digsites and artifacts (note: some artifacts are NOT safe for work).

Five stars. This is an illuminating and interesting book of history and never dryly academic or boring. I had seven years of Latin at school and I -really- wish I'd had this book as a resource to enliven some of my school presentations. This would be a good selection for public library acquisition, home library, and for readers of history and culture.

Disclosure: I received an ARC at no cost from the author/publisher for review purposes.

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"Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome" by L J Trafford seems very on trend. In the past couple of years books about approach to sex and sexuality in different time periods were booming, inviting readers to peek into sex lives of people from ye olden days.

What I like about this book is that it doesn't sensationalise the experience of sexuality and sex, but rather explores the systems that were in place and what we can derive from ancient writings, documents and art. It certainly will be an interesting read for someone who is either interested in the historical perspective on sex, or is an ancient Rome hobbyist.

I appreciate the fact that the author recognises their own limitations in terms of selecting the materials and the topics, because surely this book is not all-encompassing. It is a pleasant read nonetheless--very well researched but not academic, so it's very accessible in terms of language and style.

I must admit, that because of my previous education, very little information was new to me, hence only 3 stars. I think if I would approach this book as a complete novice, I perhaps would give a higher rating.

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Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome is a fun and educational new perspective on a subject that has enchanted the western world for millenia.

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Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome: A book I devoured.

When I spotted this on Netgalley I instantly had to try my luck and request it; the stars aligned and I jumped of joy when it showed up on my shelf. Having studied ancient greek and byzantine romances at university I was drawn to the topic of Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome; something that, despite my interest in the topic, I didn't get the chance to learn much about before.

This book does not only cover various aspects of Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome but also offers a phenomenal introduction into the society and way-of-thinking of the romans. It takes the reader on a journey through different eras, social classes, and the (sometimes questionable) commentary of contemporary witnesses.

What I absolutely adored about "Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome" is the humor that is shining through and plastered a smile on my face and made me laugh out loud several times while reading. Reading this was just pure joy to me. So many interesting facts wrapped up in such a fun-to-read language.

This book is full of intriguing and amusing stories and facts I am now ready to dramatically recall to my dates to impress them. Ok, maybe less to my dates, and more to my friends, some of whom I've already recommended this book to.

There was some phrasing throughout this book I didn't resonate as much with, it seemed a bit too generalized to me. I also felt like some topics were much more explored than others; which probably has to do with the fact that there might not be that much source material in those particular fields. Furthermore there was repetition throughout the book, which sometimes felt out of place, other times was very welcomed by a reader like me, who isn't super familiar with roman history and all the emperors.

Overall I have to give this book 5 stars because it was truly exciting, funny, thoughtful and made me happy.

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With this one, the entire premise of the book is in the title- Sex and Sexuality in Ancient Rome. Trafford begins by outlining the language used in Ancient Rome that has anything to do with sex or sexuality, she introduces these concepts and then explains them so you’re aren’t left lost throughout the book when they inevitably come up again. She then travels through the intricate and somewhat scandalous history of sex in Ancient Rome from the perfect virtuous man and the ideal chaste woman, to how to find a woman and who you are and are not meant to be seen fondling in the forum. She details erotic wall paintings and statues, the concept of witchcraft, the tantalising beauty and fashion and what was all the rage to help you pull on the streets of Rome. Not to mention, Trafford takes it upon herself to tell us all about the sexual exploits of the most well-known figures from Ancient Rome, and she does all this with ample evidence (both textual and archaeological). In short, Trafford answers everything you have ever wanted (and really not wanted) to know about sex and sexuality in Ancient Rome!

This book was a massive undertaking, and may I say the L J Trafford understood the task and executed it incredibly well. In this book, you will find chapters named things like Getting Down to Business: Sex, Sexual Problems and Solutions, Undesirable Partners and How to be Sexy: Beauty and Fashion (just to give you an idea of the types of things discussed)! As a fairly short book (sitting at only 197 pages), Trafford condenses everything you need to know about the Romans in a way that is really easy to read. Her language is colloquial, and her quips and inputs into some of the debauchery that went on in Ancient Rome made me laugh out loud. With her hilarious commentary comes an obvious attempt to remove any modern bias that could be placed upon the way sex, marriage, relationships and all that was used and experienced in Ancient Rome. She reminds the reader over and over that there isn’t really any way we can fully understand the meanings behind the erotic images, or the social importance embedded into the rules and laws attached to relationships and sex, but we can do our best! I loved that as Trafford was discussing some facet of Roman sexual experience, she would then bring in detailed case studies and examples from history.

Although sometimes Trafford seemed to take the poetry and writings of men like Ovid and Catullus at face value, often she used it to help build the whole picture around the topic she was handling at that time. It is unsurprising that the book was focused on men and boys and what was expected of them (both from an imperial lens, but also the freedmen and slaves) rather than women for the pure reason that we have a lot more information on men than women. With that being said, Trafford interspersed what we do know about women (imperial, slaves, prostitutes etc) throughout the book in what seemed like as much detail that was available. It was really wonderful to see different types of evidence (images, paintings, statues and literature), all used together to try and piece together just what sex was like in Ancient Rome, and although it was a quick tour, it was still detailed and highly enjoyable.

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Thank you to NetGalley for the copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. I am not sure what I was expecting for this book but I liked it a lot. The cheekiness from the author was fun to read. I liked the writing and the deep dive into the topic.

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Really good historical as well as entertaining book about sex and sexuality in Ancient Rome, mostly dominated by the free males. Though it starts with juicy details about penises in Pompej and other places, it then covers several topics like gender, beauty, love, magic and religion, power, sexuality with men/women/eunuchs etc. and everything that was forbidden too. Very well researched and being open if something is not clarified. Though some of Trafford´s remarks are funny, I thought some were also unnecessarily flippant. On the whole a great and easy read, especially when you´re familiar with poets and politicians of Ancient Rome.
Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for an ARC ebook in exchange for an honest review.

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This historical research book was a pleasure to read, No pun intended. Every generation likes to think they are the ones to test the boundaries and indulge in new things But history shows us we are tighter in our "morals" than ever before. It is just with the internet we are seeing and hearing everything once kept private.
Enter the ancient Romans. They were the inventors of the LGBTQ movement and no one batted an eye, AND a lot of things can happen when bathing is a social outing.
LJ Trafford is known for her deep dives into history and coloring outside of the lines in her accounts. This time is no different and I felt myself gasp a few times and I don't think I am uninformed in any of the areas discussed. This is the kind of book my generation would of have snuck out of the library for a good laugh and some education.
well done.

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