This was such a great read! As a plus-sized individual myself, it was so lovely to have a character to relate to, and it was nice to see plus size positivity in YA literature, as I didn't have a lot of it growing up!

It’s an absolutely incredible coming of age YA, that deals with a lot of important issues (mental health, dysfunctional family relationships, bullying and body image.) Honestly if you’ve ever struggled with your weight or had self-esteem issues about your size then your gonna absolutely love Lori, who is an incredibly realistic, relatable and lovable character.

“Can you truly be yourself in a one-size-fits-all world?”

Lori Palmer is the new girl at Baywater High, which prides itself on the beauty and athleticism of it’s student body (and in which school spirit is mandatory!) she misses her old school, where her talent for art pulled more weight than she does—and longs for her old life, before her parents divorced and forced her to move from Johannesburg to Cape Town (leaving everything she knows and loves behind.)

To survive Lori plans to fade into the background, but those plans are ruined when her brother befriends the sister of the most popular (and most attractive) boy at her school. Now Lori is thrust into the unfamiliar though exciting world of Waterpolo, Parties and Stargazing.

As her old anxieties begin to resurface, Lori discovers a new artistic outlet for her emotions that ignites (and inspires) a powerful movement. But when the authorities start asking questions—Lori realises finding her voice may land her in a world of trouble. But sometimes standing up for what you believe in is just a important as standing up for yourself...

I loved everything about this, it’s truly a phenomenally written, inspiring and relevant story that I feel will resonate with a lot of people. Personally, I feel that awkward teenage me would’ve loved this and benefitted from seeing herself reflected in a character like Lori- a big girl who suffers with self esteem issues but learns to accept herself for who she is.

Several issues were highlighted throughout and they really added depth and realism and were both enlightening and at times, extremely thought provoking. Aside from one stereotypical ‘Mean Girl’ all the characters were incredibly well written;with a subtlety of emotion (and motivations) that made them feel like real people—particularly Thembi,Jake and Lori’s mother.

As it is told from the perspective of a bigger person, navigating a world that stigmatises people for being ‘fat’ I expect there will be people who won’t resonate or enjoy this. But, I personally really loved this and would definitely recommend to fans of Coming of Age YA or for anyone who’s ever felt like an outsider—honestly, it’s wonderful and has such a powerful message!

Also thank you to Penguin and NetGalley for the e-ARC.

5 stars. !!LONG REVIEW BECAUSE I HAVE STUFF TO SAY. ALSO, SPOILERS AHEAD!!

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an arc in exchange for an honest opinion.

This book was so good. I know a lot of people (skinny folks) aren’t going to like this one, because this novel deals with a LOT of heavy subject matters and unresolved trauma about fat people that they’re not ready to confront. Lori, the wonderful main character, is messy, flawed and realistic in her reactions. I related on so many levels to Lori, and saw so much of my past self in her. Even my current self to be honest. I wish 16 year old me could read this, because she would’ve benefitted from seeing a fat girl who isn’t perfect but learns to grow and love herself. Parts of this book hit me hard, made me cry twice and had me laughing. A perfect balance.

Now, I also know that many reviewers will nit-pick a few things about this book. I want to clear them up, as a fat girl, so that whoever reads this can get an authentic own-voices review about certain aspects they may not understand. Obviously, fat people aren’t a monolith, but my opinion and lived experience is just as valid to talking about this book as any other fat person’s.

Ok, so: the comment about Lori’s underactive thyroid. As someone with a diagnosed underactive thyroid, who is on medication that CONTROLS NOT CURES it, I’m already anticipating the snarky comments by readers who have zero clue about how this condition works. First of all, it was nice to read about a character with the same condition as myself in text, especially as a fat character. In text, Lori talks about how she has an underactive thyroid and how that makes it harder to lose weight, which is objectively true. It’s in the name, UNDER active. Mine and Lori’s thyroids don’t produce enough of the thyroid hormone that is needed to make functions in the body, such as metabolism, energy, fatigue levels etc, work properly. Therefore, weight loss is harder, because our bodies can’t regulate the hormones and biological responses needed for us to lose weight in the same way as a person who’s thyroid works at normal, healthy capacity. In the scene where this was mentioned, Lori was upset and eating chocolate as a self-soothing mechanism after an upsetting event, which she was allowed to be upset about. These snooty people will undoubtedly think Lori brought it up as an ‘excuse’ not to lose weight. Which a) categorically isn’t true because she never used it as an excuse and b) is automatically rooted in negative fat bias. You only need to do simple research and you will find a plethora of information that associates thyroid disorders with weight gain and “how to combat it,” even though we can’t actually help it. Her eating chocolate, in her car, talking about how it’s harder to lose weight with an underactive thyroid is in no way promoting unhealthy eating habits, obesity OR her making ‘justifications for why she’s fat.’ It screams of shaming people for their coping mechanism. Are skinny people the only ones allowed to comfort eat? Are fat people not allowed to have the same coping mechanisms, such as comfort eating, for fear that a woke skinny person will tell them it’s wrong and that they need to ‘stop shoving so much food down their throat’? I beg of you to use your brain and engage those critical thinking skills here. Lori comfort eats multiple times throughout the book, and that’s not a bad thing. These people only dislike it because she’s fat. If she was skinny, they wouldn’t bat an eye. Think about that for a second.

The second thing I’d like to discuss: the inevitable comments about how she fits into the stereotype of ‘fat girl who hates being fat.’ Again, I’m going to tell you to read context clues and get those brain juices flowing. When you’ve been through as much trauma as Lori has, it’s no surprise that she wants to separate herself from her fatness at first. She says (when she’s still processing it) that she’d rather be thinner, because ‘maybe if I was thinner, all the big things wouldn’t have happened to me.’ This broke my heart, because I was exactly the same. I thought that if I was just a bit more normal, if I looked like everyone else, maybe I wouldn’t have been bullied. Is it any surprise, then, that her unresolved trauma makes her think like this? Lori was bullied, sent death threats and even nearly drowned by her bullies because she dared exist as a fat girl. She has water-based trauma because of it, to the point where she can’t take a bath. She struggles being around the sea. She has panic attacks and anxiety. This is in detail in the book, so check the trigger warnings at the end of this review, and it made me uncomfortable in the reality of it, nearly taking me back to what happened to me. This is the reality of fatphobia though. You may think Jo Watson is exaggerating, that this can’t possibly happen to every fat person. To an extent, yes, but I know this is real. It happened to me, therefore it’s not that much of an exaggeration or a stretch of reality. Fat people just don’t talk about the true extent of it, because we’re constantly gaslighted and told that our struggles aren’t valid or real because we brought it on ourselves in being fat. So no, Lori doesn’t fit into whatever strange version of a stereotype of a fat person you have. She is a deeply traumatised young woman who has been through so much, yet is working on finding her worth in herself her body. Because by the end, she does. She has a fantastic on-page therapist and learns so much about herself. This is a hard journey for her, but she does it, and by God does that make me so proud of her, and every other fat person who can do the same in real life.

Phew. That’s off my chest, so I can talk about what else I loved about this. Jake. The love interest. Yes, he’s a conventionally attractive love interest, but he’s not an asshole. And you may be thinking: that’s the bare minimum. But, when you’ve read as many books as I have with where the love interests have been so rude about fat people, it’s a refreshing change. Not only that, but he helps Lori see the value in her art and constantly supports her. He thinks she’s beautiful, and never comments on her body at all. There are some bumps in their road, but guess what? They talk about it. They work through it. And the best part of all of this is how extremely gentle, compassionate and understanding Jake is about Lori’s trauma, particularly her fear of water. He helps her start to overcome this fear she has, and I loved the little detail about how all of their kisses involved water in some way. So freaking cute. The fact that they were a solid, mutually supportive, loving, long distance couple by the end also made me so happy. We need more of these types of couples in YA books.

The short chapters were awesome, and the relationship Lori has with her autistic brother Zac was so bloody brilliant. I’m not autistic, so don’t take my opinion as the be all end all and please look up OV autistic reviews, but considering Jo Watson is neurodivergent, she knows what she’s talking about. The way she handles discussions about autism are digestible, when they don’t have to be, and make me understand the reality of what it’s like living with a sibling on the autism spectrum. Jake’s sister has ADHD too, and the bond that Lisa and Zac have is too cute for this world. I know that this is only scratching the surface of conversations about the reality of autism, and that there are so many other experiences, but what Jo Watson did here is amazing and I applaud her for that.

Can I take a second to gush about the cover and how beautiful Lori is on it? Queen behaviour. Also the succulents *chef’s kiss for the extended metaphor that extends onto the cover.*

In conclusion, as you can probably tell, I loved this. Quick note about the rep - check out below where I’ve listed it but the rep was really good, considering it was set in a place in South Africa where POC make up 10% of the population. This is a story that isn’t meant to be a nice, glossy, sugar-coated depiction of a fat young adult. It’s realistic. It’s messy. It’s flawed, and to me, that’s what makes it so very important. Please give this book a chance and take on board what I’ve written. Deconstruct your own ideas of fat people and fatness, and listen to the message of this book. It’s about her fatness yes, but it’s also about so much more. Both aspect go hand in hand and that’s why it’s a rounded, full story. Celebrate in Lori’s joy and sympathise with her struggles. She’s worthy and she’s like me. And that’s wonderful.

As Lori said, #IAmBeautiful.

Canon representation: Neurodivergent author, fat MC with anxiety and panic attacks, brother with autism, LI’s brother with ADHD, black gay best friend, gay best friend, adopted black friend and fat therapist.

Trigger/Content Warnings: Fatphobia (Internalised and Outward), Mentions of Death Threats, Bullying, Anxiety, Nail Biting/Picking, Talk of Dieting/Body Image/Weight, Panic Attacks, Autism Stigma, Discussions of Austism/ADHD Misdiagnoses, Side Effects of Autism/ADHD Medicine, Autism Meltdown, Mention of Depression/Anti-Depressants, Mentions of Recovered Alcohol Addiction, Attempted Drowning by Bullies, Water-Based Trauma, Divorced/Cheating Parents, Mentions of Parental Abandonment, On-Page Therapy, Anxiety Medicine, Missing Children, Death of Missing Child/Funeral, Mentions of Child Death by Car Crash, Swearing, Police, and Mentions of Violence Towards Women/Children.

Lori has just moved to a new school and is worried about making new friends. At her old school she was badly bullied because of her weight and she has problems at home as her mother isn't particularly supportive of her art and her brother has special needs. I thought this was a really interesting book because it didn't focus on one specific teen issue- as is more realistic there's a lot going on for everyone. I thought this was a really positive and fun YA book and I would thoroughly recommend it.

A really lovely surprise. Reminds me a tad bit of the Kissing Booth in some aspects, so definitely one for the fans of that short of novel.

The main character is a winner, I really enjoyed reading about her. I’ve never really read any books set in South Africa, so it was lovely reading about all these places fiction or otherwise. The author really paints a vivid image of it all.

It does touch on subjects of adulterous parents and divorce, which I think is good especially as it seems it’s so common yet parents don’t really want to expose their children to that. It’s honest. The conversations the main character has with her parent at the end was really realistic, I could imagine it being said between a parent and child.

You know when you devour a book in one sitting that it’s a good one?! I love young adult fiction, especially when it has an important message, and this is one of those books. I loved this book from the second I opened it and I urge everyone teen to read this, it is completely relevant to our time