I loved The Secret Lives of Church Ladies far more than expected. It was a short story collection which I got through so quickly - absolutely readable to the highest degree & so emotionally solid. Every inch of writing was real and feeling, and all of Philyaw’s characters could so easily be real people. I think that’s quite why I enjoyed the stories so much, due to their liveliness and reality. It introduced me to a community which is unlike my own, but deeply deeply interesting & well figured. My favourite story had to be how to make love to a physicist, I thought it was really beautiful and not at all what I expected.

Of course, my initial attraction to this book was based purely on the cover because I can be a very shallow person. However, I was intrigued by the title too. I don’t read a lot of short story collections and I don’t think I was completely aware that this book was until I started it but I have to say, these stories got to me!

Featuring nine stories about multiple Black women, this collection explores the battle between what the church wants them to be and who they really want to be. With themes of forbidden desire, illicit activity and internalised shame, the secret lives of these church ladies are laid bare for all of us to see.

In the first story, Eula doesn’t seem to realise that she is a lesbian. Although she lives with and sleeps with her female lover, she continues to have boyfriends and be disappointed in them. As the story is told through the eyes of Eula’s lover, we can clearly see what Eula can’t and therefore, we get a complete picture of her behaviour pattern. It’s clear that homophobia runs so deep inside Eula, almost certainly due to her religion, that it’s simply unthinkable that she could be gay. So unthinkable that the fact she sleeps with a woman doesn’t even spell it out for her.

Dear Sister sees a woman writing to a sister that she hasn’t met before. As she’s explaining the famiy setup, we learn all about her other sisters and how an upbringing in their family and the church has affected each of them. I loved seeing the sisters interact and found it fascinating that nnly one of them (Renee) seemed to have turned out to be a ‘typical church lady’. They all seem to have a feistiness, which you don’t expect from Christian women. It was really refreshing to see God-fearing women who still have a lot of fire and aren’t afraid to voice their opinions.

Peach Cobbler is a story with so much in it. It follows a mother and daughter caught up in the infidelities of a married pastor. Misogyny is rife within the mother and this transfers on to her daughter, as the girl grows up. The girl is taught that her body changing into an adult female’s is full of shame and that it needs to be hidden. I know that this is an idea that so many girls grow up with and it has a very detrimental effect on how they relate to their bodies in later life. In fact, we see how it affects this girl later on in the collection, which was excellent.

In Instructions For Married Christian Husbands, we see a woman breaking out of the restrictions and values that she has been raised with. She openly sleeps with married men because she enjoys it and she likes the power it gives her. The story stands out within the collection because the narrator is free of shame and purity, which haunt most of the other stories. It put a smile on my face because this sharp, open ‘instruction manual’ is all about freedom and living as you want to. Infidelity and sexual exploration isn’t just for men, who knew?

The Secret Lives Of Church Ladies is a daring, honest exploration of the complex relationship between religion and female sexuality. Through the voices of Black women from multiple generations, it looks at queerness, truth and the power that comes with living authentically. The flow between the stories was seamless too, which created a fantastic unity between all of these women.

This is a wonderful collection of short stories that explore the hidden desires of church going black women. I loved the beautiful writing, so descriptive of the angst and pain shared by these strong women, and each story was a wonderful window into the women's worlds. Full of laughter and pain, these stories felt like a true reflection of the women's worlds.

Short stories are not normally my thing. I either struggle to connect with the characters or am left wanting more. This was not the case with this beautiful collection, which covers themes of love, desire and sexuality among Black women, as set against the religious beliefs and upbringing that denies them.

Without exception, the women’s voices are raw and honest, and often drenched in guilt; their conflicting emotions portrayed with an intimacy that is both haunting and fierce.

My favorite of the nine stories was Snowfall, about two women whose ‘forbidden’ relationship had forced them to move far from home in order to live openly in their love. I was struck by the conflict between romantic and familial love; the nostalgia and longing for one’s roots, while accepting that ‘home’ is a person and not a place.

Overall, I found this a powerful and very readable anthology and would recommend both to short story lovers and those who perhaps struggle with this genre.

What a highly readable collection of stories! These nine tales all delve behind the scenes (as the title suggests) of a community of Black women. It explores their public persona verses their private lives and how their sexuality sits alongside their religious beliefs.

Each story layers on a different theme too to keep the read feeling fresh. Peach Cobbler was my favourite but all the characters we meet are 3D and full of heart.

These short stories could have been really gossip-y and full of judgment. But instead this is collection full of compassion towards mess and care for the moments of rest, relief and intimacy these Black women and girls experience. I haven’t heard anyone highlight that there is queer rep in these stories. Given the associations with goodness and Godliness that you might conjure from the title, I really wanted to say how much I loved to see sapphic/bisexual representation as part of the fabric of Black womanhood. I also love the really clear distinction between messy behaviour and being toxic, cruel, and/or abusive.

I completely understand why “Peach Cobbler” is the favourite chapter but I loved “Eula” and “How to Make Love to a Physicist.” My favourite is “Instructions got Married Christian Husbands”

Deesha Philyaw’s collection of short stories about The Secret Lives of Church Women is as delicious as its striking cover suggests. The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is such a great title for this collection of nine short stories about Black women. Deesha Philyaw takes us behind the public persona these women present to the world and into their private sphere, showing us how they live, behave, think and feel when they shrug off their Sunday best and are no longer on best behaviour.

Eula gives us a real sense of the fierce intensity and urgency of these women’s feelings and desires and sets the tone for what is to follow in this collection. It also shows the conflict which arises when those same feelings clash with their religious beliefs or upbringing; the struggle they experience each time, whether that comes from their own feelings of guilt or shame or morality, or external pressures from friends or family, their community, and even wider society.

Not Daniel is urgent in a different way as one woman seeks temporary release with a stranger in the same situation as her. I liked the matter-of-fact way this story was told and the humour along the way. Dear Sister moved me, amused me and showed me the strength we find in humour to deal with difficult situations and how sisters and half-sisters can bond. I loved the voices of these women throughout the collection; even when they think that they are failing or weak or struggle, their voices ring true with a raw honesty and resilience – the hard pit of that peach on the cover, if you will.

Peach Cobbler is as rich and juicy a story as the dessert it takes its name from, there is so much to take away from this one. It’s such a good example of how these stories are as fully rounded as the women who tell them. We see the child she is when she says, “God was an old fat man, like a Black Santa…”, follow her fascination with the forbidden fruit of the titular pudding as she grows up, and see how that manifests itself later, as she comes to realise its true significance. It’s an incredibly powerful story about a mother and daughter and everything they cannot have.

I also thoroughly enjoyed Snowfall about two women whose relationship has led them to move to a different State and who are now going through a rough patch. It’s filled with the pain of being separated from friends and family—that yearning and nostalgia for home—while also showing how love can bolster our resolve and the touching way in which people express their love for one another. How to make love to a physicist is a beautiful slow-burn of a love story where the character has to learn to “ditch the girdles your mother taught you to wear.” Jael is a story of a grandmother and her granddaughter who have no other family left but are struggling to understand each other as well as their own feelings.

Instructions for Married Christian Husbands is a pithy and very funny manual which pulls no punches. It just flows and I loved it. There was a change of tempo and tone for When Eddie Levert comes and I felt for both mother and daughter in this story. It’s heartbreaking at times but also interesting to see the changing dynamic between them and how the daughter chooses to react to that. I also liked the contrast between the brother and her male friend who sees the daughter altogether more clearly. The collection ends with Must Love IPAs, a modern tale of Internet dating and sibling brinksmanship which is ultimately funny and charming and made me close the book with a huge smile on my face.

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is a warm, funny, refreshingly honest and affectionate look at Black women’s lives, loves, struggles and hardship. Pulsing with life and fierce, heartfelt emotion, these women’s voices are strong and compelling. Listen to them, their stories deserve to be read. I’ll happily sing their praises and can’t wait to revisit them.

These short stories were fun, dynamic, fresh, and I loved the characters - despite being short stories, they all felt developed enough and I liked the themes of love, desire and motherhood. Some were better than others, as is always the case with short stories, but I read them in one sitting and really enjoyed them.

an absolutely beautiful collection of well-crafted short stories, touching on topics of homophobia, infidelity, poverty, guilt, sexism, desire, self-perception, and (obviously) religion. I feel like my words can't do it justice as the stories are just so real and raw and honest, so I would recommend reading it for yourself. Short story collections aren't my usual choice, but I'm certainly glad I got to read this one.

A fascinating anthology of short stories, stories of black women of all ages and their relationship.
Women seen as people who feel, has desire and lives.
Women in Church, any confession, are seen as supporting, helping or sinner. They seldom seen as person with dreams and needs.
This women in this books are sweet, sad, tender, and fleshed out.
The excellent debut of a new author.
Highly recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this ARC, all opinions are mine

This was a super book to read in short bouts as these are individual stories, rather one long tale. I was able to read whole stories while waiting for the daughter coming home on the train, sitting in the car park...it was enthralling.
What I enjoyed was how the characters were relatable, we all can identify with someone we know similarly, or we can see how plausible all of these stories can be.. The writing felt raw, in a good way, written as if from biography...these ladies were all very real.
Having never read a short story book since childhood, this was a refreshing change, stories long enough to capture the imagination whilst being short enough to pack a punch in each..Loved it!
Many thanks to NetGalley for my ARC, this is my unbiased pinion.

The Secret Lives Of Church Ladies is a collection of nine stories.All of them feature Black women and their lives and relationships from romantic to familial. They each have their own challenges and desires.

Each story is told in a distinct way and I love the writing style. They all felt so real. We hear stories about infidelity, religion, sexism and everything in between.

Society and the Church play a huge part in most of these women's lives and they are made to hide their inner feelings but display different ones on the outside. Some watch their mothers cheat, some sleep with married men, some are in same sex relationships with their mother not approving. It is a beautiful and emotive look at relationships and how we perceive ourselves inside but also how we want others to perceive us outside.

A wonderful collection.

This is a captivating collection of nine short stories depicting moments in the lives of black women; women who are pushing against the constraints enforced upon them by familial and societal commitments and expectations. The stories are all compelling, often poignant, full of emotion, anger, humour, and heartbreak, as these women attempt to forge their own identities and lives away from their families, the church and a society that is constantly judging them. There are so many diverse relationships between women – mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, great-grandmothers, lovers, and friends – and the explorations of the complexities inherent in these relationships is at the core of this collection.

All of the stories are interesting and have relatable characters, but I particularly loved ‘Peach Cobbler’, in which Olivia is subject to the emotional neglect of her mother, who claims to be raising her to not have expectations and to be satisfied with what she has, to the extent that Olivia seeks affection elsewhere in often inappropriate places. The story ‘Jael’ is also engaging, as the story is split into two perspectives, that of 14-year-old Jael and her great-grandmother as they try to navigate the intricacies of a relationship spanning generations, beliefs and attitudes. ‘How to Make Love to a Physicist’ is a wonderful love story which includes profound conversations about religion and physics, and ‘Instructions for Married Christian Husbands’ is funny and astute.

This entire collection is intelligent and engaging and each story is well-written and thought-provoking. A fantastic debut!

I want to take a star off because this book is too short! Each story in this book was perfect. That she put peach cobbler and instructions in the same book without making it cliche. The story about Jael was so cleverly done! Basically, I need to get a copy of this for my bookshelf!

Thank you, NetGalley for the chance to read and review this book!

I read this collection in 2 sittings. I absolutely adored how raw, beautiful, sexually charged the stories were. I could not give it less than 5 stars.

The stories cover many sensitive topics: religion (of course), poverty, family, sex, love, food, homophobia, and more.

Highly recommended. It will be firmly in my top 3 of 2022 reads, I'm sure. But perhaps not to gift to older, prudish relatives...!

Thank you @pushkin_press and @netgalley for the copy!

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is “unapologetically Black” according to the author herself! It's a great description. This collection of short stories looks at facets of life a lot of people might have lived but many more wouldn't really have considered the extent or scope of the strict issues at all.

 The stories look at the relationship Black women have with two big institutions - the church & marriage - the pressures of family life plus expectations of society in general.

There are some shocks, some surprises & some genuinely laugh-out-loud funny moments. Even in excruciatingly emotional situations, there's humour to be found.

With story titles like 'Dear Sister' with news & thoughts of so many different family members in one letter. Others: Peach Cobbler & Not-Daniel are so completely different & explore near-impossible feelings.

Though we only get to experience a brief snippet of the ladies' lives, the writing & personal intricacies in their hidden lives make it a fascinating read & definitely opens our minds to how different someone's life can really be compared to their outward impressions & sculpted personas.

Thank you Pushkin Press for the ARC. I appreciate it.

What a book! Perfect for when you want to take a break from your usual reads and definitely perfect to help you get out of a reading slump.

The book features nine short stories that follow different characters, although the centre stage is given to black women and girls in Southern America. All these Church Ladies, spanning over four generations, are all trying to figure out their place in the world, their desires, their passion and their needs, whilst also having a strong belief in God and his teachings.

I loved that the author explored the lives of different women, especially their inner thoughts, reasoning and passions, but also didn’t shy to show their outer characters, how vulnerable, strong, distinct, loving, caring and colourful all those women are. These stories also look at how these ladies react to pressures, standards and rules set by society and the church, and how all of that changed their lives in ways they might not even imagine.

It was such an easy and refreshing read. I managed to devour this book in a few hours. Although, it is a book that I would love to go back and reread the separate stories, whilst giving more time to concentrate and get to know each of the heroines better in their respective stories. It is a book that is worth a place on your shelf and that you will come back to read over and over again, as each story has so much to give.

I also loved the writing style, words in this book just flows and there are no wasted words and no long-winded descriptions that would take you off the topic, everything is said for a reason and everything that has been said in these stories matter, either to the character or their story.

My favourite stories are ‘The Peach Cobbler’, ‘Dear Sister’ and ‘Instructions for Married Christian Husbands’, as they are all so powerful but at the same time made me have a rollercoaster of emotions, including laughs, tears and heartaches.

Overall: One of the best short story books I have ever read. Definitely worth reading and having on your shelf. I know that I will be re-reading it soon, especially to have a break from longer books that I am reading to give me that energy and get me out of the reading slump.

🍑 ‘You cook and paint and nap and stroke yourself to sleep at night. And as your body begins to feel like a home, your courage grows.’ 🍑

I’m kicking off the blog tour for The Secret Lives of Church Ladies by @deeshaphilyaw today!

This is a brilliant collection of short stories. The nine stories follow the lives of Black women and girls from four generations who are caught between the church’s expectations, the double standards and their own needs and desires.

Sometimes short stories can feel disjointed but this was far from that. Each story was engaging and the collection as a whole flowed well. I found pieces of myself in these characters and that’s probably why I felt so attached to the stories.

I think my favourite story was ‘How to make love to a physicist’. It’s refreshing and the conflict/difficult issue in this story is time. It’s also a story that shows glimpses of being able to be on your own, unlearning things and then relearning things on your own.

I loved reading about their secret longings, forbidden affairs, new loves and seeing their vulnerability. It’s a remarkable collection written by the very talented Deesha Philyaw!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️✨

Thank you to @pushkin_press and @netgalley for a copy of this wonderful book! #thesecretlivesofchurchladies is out now!

Generally, I find short stories unsatisfying however, I did very much enjoy this collection. This book is a series of vignettes of African American women - young/old, straight/gay, single/attached, and their relationship to sex and how they reconcile that (or not) to faith and adherence to a religion that does not permit the sexual expression or fulfilment that they truly desire. Secret longings, forbidden love, religious hypocrisy and the exploration of outer community and family lives vs. hidden inner feelings is excellently handled and covers a multitude of nuanced narratives and characters. Very enjoyable.

What a beautifully written collection of interwoven short stories! All about the overlooked and undervalued inner and outer lives of black women.
The stories cover religion, families, love, sexuality, colourism and a woman’s lot.
They’re funny and smart and you feel really invested in the characters and their relationships.
It’s a tight, bold, strong collection and I loved it! Fabulous!
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC. All views are my own.