This title caught my eye, and I like Abi MOrgan's screenwriting work-Iron Lady and Suffragette among others. THis book was a devastating, moving account of her husband, Jacob Krichefski's severe reaction to the withdrawal of a test drug, that affected his MS, the effect on the family, with Abi's memories of their meet-cute and life to that point, interspersed between. Her writing about their relationship captures the little notes of sharing your life with someone else so perfectly, you catch your breath at how accurate and lovely it is. Abi and her partner are perfect for each other, but also so real, in the way human beings are, and it's not easy to capture this in as pitch-perfect a tone as Morgan's achieved in this. Morgan captures the gamut of emotions you go through when a family member's hospitalised-the exhaustion, the constant worry, coordinating logistics for visits, the feeling you have of constantly being on tenterhooks waiting for news, and hoping for the best while fearing the worst, and it usually falls somewhere in-between! She doesn't gloss over any of it at all, and offer platitudes of hope-her writing shows you what it's like in all its pain and difficulty, where you just put one foot in front of the other and get through the day. Morgan's situation caused her more emotional pain when Krichefski developed a mental health problem that prevented him from recognising her, so she practically has to develop their relationship from scratch. Hr writing is so raw, and so relatable-she doesn't omit aspects that might make her seem unsympathetic, which adds to just how deeply real the book is. We all experience feelings of frustration and anger and self-pity in circumstances like this, and who among us hasn't thought about how this would play out in a movie? Morgan's movie imaginings are obviously far better than ours would be, given her scriptwriting talent, and it's also a great insight into the process of writing for screen, how something would play out, what bits would get edited out because things really couldn't be like that! It really was like that for Morgan, though, and the ending had me in absolute tears. Like the title defiantly states, this is not a pity memoir. THis is a love story

I was putting off reading this for some time. Not because I wasn’t interested, I was really keen to be honest. But because I assumed it would ‘difficult’ to read with so much other difficult stuff happening pretty much everywhere. But I as so wrong, utterly utterly wrong. Of course this isn’t a light read, a throwaway kind of frippery that you can pick up and put down again without thinking. But I really should’ve believed the title, There is no pity here, no woe is me, I’m so hard done by, what have I done to deserve all this. Instead there is so much tender wit, so much resilience, so many ‘fireflies’, so much acceptance that whilst nothing will ever be the same again, things can, and will, be good again. One of the most human and humane books I’ve read. Simply a MUST read.

I love abi Morgan as a screenwriter, however I found this book lacking in something. It felt like an elephant just plodding, slow and heavy. Not an enjoyable read for me.

I really enjoyed this book. It was incredibly moving - both heartbreaking and hilarious at times. Abi Morgan has made the transition from screenwriter to author superbly. I have already recommended this book to everyone I know.

I love Abi Morgan, and I adore her writing style.
But this book just felt a little too ploddy and repetitive. I know that's hard to say as it's such a personal book but it just wasn't for me.

This is an absolutely wonderful book! I actually put off reading this for a short while, as I was going through some personal difficulties and wasn't sure if I'd be able to cope with hearing about someone else's grief. I couldn't have been more wrong, as although the author of this book has been through unbelievably difficult times, her experience and writing gave me strength and hope.

Abi Morgan is a screenwriter and her writing style in this mimics a lot of her though processes/stream of consciousness as she deals with her husband's collapse and subsequent major health issues. I appreciated how honest she was about her feelings and the impact on her and her family. Not only is her husband seriously ill (spending a long time in an induced coma) but he is sadly no longer the same person when he wakes up, with personality changes and huge gaps in his memory. Whilst dealing with this, Morgan also has to deal with her own serious health problems (following almost the exact same experience my own mum had a few years ago, so this was especially emotional for me).

Well done to Abi Morgan for writing this extraordinary book, and making it out on the other side of this unbelievably tough period of time for her family. I cannot even begin to imagine the stress and impact of it all. Big love to her and her family.

This was a very moving book and made me think a lot, The writing was great and sadness mixed with humour, its just a cracking read for all. Read it in a single day it was just that good.

Welsh award winning screenwriter Abi Morgan recalls her husband's hospitalisation with MSand her battle with breast cancer in this unflinching, emotional memoir.
The style drew me in instantly, drifting between the past, between different memories. I couldn't put this
book down, it was a tricky read at times, and it definitely doesn't shy away from the trauma and anxiety created by the events that impact Abi's family.
Yet what shines through is the hope and optimism of Abi's support network, helping her family through each day. The kindness and resilience of each person Morgan described is inspiring. In the synopsis, the book is described as "a reminder that, even in the worst times, there is light ahead". I don't think you can put it better than that.

I am struggling to find the words to describe this book. The words “memoir” or “autobiography” or “non-fiction” don’t go anywhere close to covering what is a truly powerful work.

Abi Morgan is a playwright and screenwriter well known for films such as “Shame” and “Suffragette” and TV hits such as “The Hour” and “The Split.” But this is not a showbiz autobiography. It instead recounts the last few years of Morgan and her family’s lives which have been beset by tragedies and having to adapt to a whole new way of life as a result.

I am already a fan of much of Morgan’s work so I was expecting it to be well written and interesting, but what I wasn’t expecting was to be knocked sideways at times by the brutal honesty of her experiences and feelings. The sections where she recounts her perceived parenting mistakes felt so personal. But this made the book all the more powerful and relatable.

While it isn’t always an easy read due to the subject matter, I would highly recommend this book to anyone. As Morgan recounts her husband saying, they are just words on a page but “if they mean something to someone then they are worth saying.” Well, they meant something to me and I suspect they will to countless others so thank you to the author.

Thank you also to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this book.

I was blown away by Morgan's strength and of her entire family. A reminder that life can change in a flash in ways you can never imagine.

This is a well written and sensitive story but unless you were a member of the family or friends of the ill man, it is meaningless. It drifts along with medical detail and information about the family’s past relationships. There is no gripping storyline or awaited climax. It is more of a diary for the immediate family. I found it to be disappointing. Indeed ,it is not a Pity Memoir but it is a pity.

What a book! I personally found it to be a very hard read, as Husband and I are also struggling with his ill health, that has totally affected our outlook on life. It is a powerful read, a highly emotional account of the life changing events that have affected all members of the her family.
Abi’s husband Jacob, collapses after a drug that he was taking to control his MS, is withdrawn. He spends a year recovering, the results are devastating for the family and Jacob.
My husband collapsed after his first Covid 19 jab, he spent three weeks in hospital with blood clots to the brain, spine and feet. A year later, we are told, no new progress can be achieved, brutally harsh.
This novel portrays the feelings of disbelief that is primary, why such events happen. There is a grim determination to get answers, to get through this horror that has been inflicted upon a family, the attempts to regain all that has been lost, possibly for ever. There is always the hope that there will be better times ahead, but, we have to get used to a new normal.
Jacob doesn’t recognise Abi, he wants nothing to do with her. My husband has been left with STML, all our shared memories have gone, it’s a real conversation killer!! This novel is full of clinical details that will be so useful for Nursing and Medical staff in these situations. I fully intend to buy copies for our local teaching hospital library, to say thanks for all their skilled care of my husband.
It confronts all the fears that are unspoken, but keep carers awake at night. I got better access to NHS services as a caregiver , rather than a wife!! I’m not ashamed to admit I cried over this book, it was a challenging read, but it did help, it did provide some comfort, it hinted at hope and a strong belief, that better times are ahead, and that is what you have to believe. A powerful book.
Many thanks to Netgalley and the publishers John Murray Press, for my digital copy, in exchange for my honest, unbiased review. I have given this five stars. I will leave reviews to other outlets later.

We read to feel like we're not alone, and I believe the same is true with writing.

Documenting the sudden and devastating collapse of her partner Jacob, Abi Morgan writes with candour and grim determination to make some sense of the seemingly senseless.

Six months in a coma, endless tests, and a gradual reawakening leave more questions than answers. And to be told he will never fully recover is devastating. Add to that, her own diagnosis of breast cancer. Her memoir is a testament to the human will to endure, and the power of love and support.

Most heartbreaking of all is that Jacob, her best friend and partner, no longer recognises her as his Abi. And nothing will convince him otherwise.

Jacob is not who he was, but there are minuscule glimpses and the human ability to adapt is awe-inspiring. Abi bravely recounts her grief, her frustration, and her determination to make their lives as fulfilling as is possible.

No pity here, but a memoir that reminds us in no uncertain terms, that we must live fully, love hard, and take nothing for granted.

I requested this book as a HUGE admirer of Abi Morgan’s work, but knowing nothing of her personal story and I am absolutely gobsmacked by this book. As I am currently facing some serious illness in my family, and struggling emotionally with it I found this book just SO comforting in its honesty, dark humour and hope. I cried A LOT. Beautiful.

This book certainly packs a punch. It’s a powerful and insightful account of the impacts of illness on a family and how they cope. However, despite the topic, it doesn’t come across as a depressing read, but leaves the reader feeling that they too can cope. A beautiful piece of writing.

This memoir is very much influenced by the author's experience as an award winning screenwriter, the pace of the book is immediate and intense. This us a great example of form reflecting content, the immediate first person perspective of this book and intense atmosphere reflects the tumult that Morgan and her family went through when her partner and father of her children suddenly fell ill and the long process of recovery that followed. It's a raw and highly emotional book and captures a feeling of free fall when a person's life feels like it is unravelling around them.

A straight up five star book, no hesitation. Written so beautifully that I could hear Abi and her family in my head - a family that’s been through an unimaginable amount. Funny and heartbreaking at turns, and the title is spot on.

This is really well written, but heartbreaking.
There is a humour here, something only someone who has experience a life-threatening condition can appreciate.

Wow this is a book I won't forget in a hurry. What an emotional gripping read, thank you to the author for sharing her story, it’s not one I will forget.

As someone going through her own neurological issues (and at time of writing, investigations into a possible Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis) this was a hard book to read and equally review. As it is a memoir about her own life and her partner’s illness, I don’t want to write this like a normal book review, but I will mention a few points that stood out for me.

This book felt very much like a rambling of thoughts, and I mean this in a good way. We are getting front row seats to Abi’s life, her joys and triumphs, her sadness and failures. She is opening up to us and nothing is off limits and I feel privileged to have been allowed access.

There is a humour here, something only someone who has experience a life-threatening condition can appreciate. A lot of people who aren’t in the inner circle of illness or grief question how you can still smile and laugh, but you have to or you’ll end up spending your whole life crying, and that’s no fun at all.

Abi doesn’t hide away from the dark and difficult moments, the sadness or the grief at losing her husband as she once knew him. This had the power to be quite frightening but it wasn’t. She was honest and there’s something beautiful about that.

There’s a line in it that I think sums up the glory and the devastation of modern medicine: “Does shame lie with the cruelty of medicine that works so hard to save a life, yet gives no promise of actually bringing the person back?” Is there a shame in not wanting a life to be saved if it’s not worth living? Or should we save all lives regardless of the consequences? It’s a quandary many of us have considered. I know that when my late grandmother was very sick with dementia, every time she went into hospital with infections or other illnesses, the medical staff (as brilliant as they are) were only interested in treating the illness, keeping her alive and sending her home. But she didn’t want to be here. And truth be told, I’m not sure we did either. Is there a taboo around wishing that?

I imagine neither Jacob nor Abi would want to be known as inspirational and i understand that, but I’m still going to say they are. Abi lived through her own cancer diagnosis, treatment and surgery, whilst raising her two children, running a house, and caring for her very poorly husband. All of that must have been emotionally, mentally and physically draining even to put one foot in front of the other. Jacob will no doubt say he’s done nothing inspirational, all he’s done is fall ill and survived it. But that’s why. As someone who is having to get used to being cared for herself, I can understand how difficult it can be. And even surviving such a terrible illness is an inspiration in itself. But together, they are a team and they get through it and show that you can climb every mountain and come back down again.

I will finish with Abi’s on words on her book: “There are no such things as pity memoirs, only words on a page and if they mean something to someone, they are worth being said.”