Oh I loved this one. I picked it up a month ago and just wasn’t in the right frame of mind for it. I started it again yesterday and read it in two sittings.

Lots of you will have read Emilie Pine’s brilliant non-fiction Notes to Self, a candid, intimate book of essays on various subjects including infertility, a subject that is at the heart of this, her debut novel.

The book follows two characters, Ruth, a 43 year old psychotherapist whose marriage to Aidan is crumbling as they both try to process the pain of infertility, and Pen, a 16 year old neurodiverse girl who has a big day ahead of her with a climate change protest and a planned declaration of love to her best friend Alice.

This quiet, intimate story unfolds over the course of a day in Dublin, and gives such a relatable, painful insight into these women’s minds and their hopes and dreams.

Complex issues like infertility, miscarriage, sexuality, neurodiversity and difficult relationships are explored in the book, and there’s a candour and vulnerability to how Pine approaches them. There was one particular chapter that was very raw and relatable (do note the content warnings below). Lest we needed a reminder, the book teaches us that nobody is perfect, we all have our struggles that we carry with us.

It’s a book that feels deeply personal, a tale told from the heart. Buy it and sob by the pool on your hols - but please do note the content warnings below. 4/5 ⭐️

** ⚠️ CW: infertility, miscarriage, failed IVF

*Ruth and Pen by Emilie Pine will be published on 12 May 2022. I read an advance digital copy courtesy of the publishers @penguinbooks @hamishhamilton @figtreebooks via @netgalley.*

CONTENT WARNING FOR THE BOOK ITSELF: miscarriage (detailed description of the event and subsequent emotional fallout), failed IVF

This book lacks and desperately needs a content warning for miscarriage. Even the blurb does not hint that one of the characters has gone through this. As someone who had a full-term stillbirth 18 years ago, I found the detailed description of the miscarriage itself incredibly upsetting and I can only imagine the harm this may cause to someone who has more recently gone through anything similar.

I may have chosen to not read the book had I realised it was in there.

I really hope that the publisher considers inserting a content warning for this, or rewriting the blurb to include mention of the miscarriage.

I would also suggest a mention or warning for failed IVF.

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Ruth and Pen follows two Irish women in Dublin - Ruth, a therapist in a failing marriage, and Pen, an autistic teenager trying to navigate the world and her social circles. The entire story takes place in the course of a single day, with the two characters in their vastly different circles crossing paths briefly the way that any strangers in a city might.

This book is very much not the genre nor writing style that I would normally gravitate towards. Nevertheless, it was compelling enough (and a quick and easy enough read) that I finished it anyway.

While I am Ruth's age, I could not relate to this character at all. I have had a similar traumatic experience but my common ground with Ruth ends there. I found her quite dreary, pathetic at times, frustrating at others. I had no investment in her life or her marriage. I also felt that she lacked any real personality - her grief and her failing marriage seemed to be her only real character traits. Her life seemed painfully boring, too.

I identified much more with Pen, perhaps because I am also neurodivergent. She had much more personality, and I was invested in her plans, her feelings, her hopes. I enjoyed seeing myself and my feelings reflected in Pen in some of the situations she was in.

Although I can't relate to Ruth, I do have to say that I found the situations each character were in were very realistic. It was very "normal people" stuff, things that you might have experienced yourself or know someone else who has. The way people reacted in each of these situations was very real, too, very human.

The writing style itself though is very much not for me - I felt constantly bombarded by the stream of consciousness. The writing style felt so loud in my head, like it was just a never ending waterfall of thoughts and words. I don't like it when my head is loud!

Ruth & Pen by Emilie Pine

A day in the life of Ruth, a therapist who wonders if her marriage to Aidan is over now that they won't have children, and Pen, a neurodiverse 16 year old who wonders if best friend Alice feels the same way. Set in Dublin against the backdrop of a climate strike, we follow these women and their internal dialogues over the course of the day.

Fabulous! Loved the characters, the setting, the insight into their thoughts, feelings and dilemmas... everything! Special place in my heart for Pen and Claire - I'd love to read more about them. Very highly recommended.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC of this book.

I had loved Pine's non-fiction debut, NOTES TO SELF, so was interested in this.

It follows two women across one day in one city, and each of them is trying to get through a difficult time (one her teenage years!).

It took me a while to warm to the characters, and ultimately I didn't feel particularly attached to them. This has been the same for a few books I've read recently, that others have loved while I've felt distinctly 'meh' towards them. Pine is a good writer but this wasn't for me.

(Review not posted to Amazon/social media)

I found this book incredibly sad, depressing really. I actually thought that I may not finish it but I did end up reading it in the hope that there would be some happier events but there weren't. I didn't feel it went anywhere. It was a snippet of the characters lives and an unhappy one at that. Unfortunately this is not a book I would recommend.

Ruth and Pen is a gentle and insightful character study of a small group of people on a day in 2019. We meet Ruth as she awakens Monday morning . Memories of her previous night before and what lies ahead dominate her waking thoughts as she prepares for her first client . Ruth a therapist, helps process other peoples problems for them . These help distract from her own temporarily but then inevitably she keeps coming back to her last conversations with her husband Aidan . Will her marriage last the day ?
16 year old Pen is getting ready to attend an environmental protest with her best friend Alice . She wants to be more than best friends with Alice but how will she know what Alice wants ?
This was a beautifully written and poignant story of relationships and how they form us . The author did an excellent portrayal of how infertility affects a couple and we are left with a feeling of closure after a day of emotional guilt , anger and sorrow for what could have been . Claire , mother to Penn comes across as a particularly strong and capable mother who understands her daughter more than she will ever know .
Thanks to NetGalley for an arc for an honest review .

Ruth & Pen is a gentle and poignant book that allows us inside the heads of several characters - though mostly the two title protagonists - over the course of Monday 7 October, 2019, a fairly unremarkable day for the future history books one imagines (and seemingly confirmed by Google). We are in Dublin and the time-stamped chapters pass by smoothly as a therapist and teenage girl wander about the messy (but plausible) grooves and pathways of their ordinary-yet-vivid, lives. They intersect twice, fairly briefly and neither gives much thought to these particular encounters in the hours afterwards.

(Should I stress Ulysses at this point? Or Mrs Dalloway? Probably not as I've never read the former and have only a vague recollection of the latter but both flitted across my mind whilst reading this.)

I never really see the point of recapping the plot, but I did find that the generational difference in the characters produced some interesting perspectives, and Emilie Pine teases out some understated, perhaps lightly ironic parallels. Ruth and her husband have been unable to have a baby in spite of the best medical efforts, and their childlessness is causing all manner of emotional disintegration and communication failures between them, as they try to come to terms with a future sans enfants. Meanwhile, Pen - 16 years old and with more than enough going on in her own head - is attending XR rallies and dealing with her own neurodiversity, whilst coming to terms with the usual teenage angsty stuff as well as being someone whose existence has likely contributed, through no fault of her own, to various pressures and strains on her parents' (now-ended) marriage.

Both Ruth & Pen crave to be understood, and profoundly 'known' by the people who care for them and they care for, and whilst it's perhaps somewhat clichéd to wonder whether this isn't, deep down, merely something to which we all aspire, there is plenty of authorial skill on display as we gain genuine insight into what these characters feel, and worry and think about.

It isn't a life-changing book, but ironically that's perhaps where its power and charm lie. As the hours slip by, so I found myself remaining engaged by these characters and wondering quite how, or indeed if, anything might be resolved by day's end. (Are life's tangled knots ever conveniently resolved just before we are overtaken by sleep? Perhaps sometimes sufficiently to allow us to wake up the following morning with a sense of hopeful possibility.) Emilie Pine writes economically, and with understated grace; overall I found this to be maybe slightly meandering in parts - not unlike life! - but delicately sketched and worth persisting with.

With thanks to NetGalley for an advanced copy in exchanged for an unbiased review.

The fictional debut of an author I've heard a lot about and was intrigued to read, Ruth and Pen follows a day in the life of two Dubliners - psychologist Ruth who is in her mid-late thirties, and Pen who is a teenager who cares passionately about the climate and various other social and environmental issues. If you enjoy a novel that feels like you're in the skin of two people at a crossroads in their very different lives, where their every thought and move is made accessible to you, then you will enjoy this literary novel. For me, one of the characters was far more interesting than the other and while I appreciated the thematic intention of the dual storylines, I was impatient for the narrative to return to the character I found more appealing, but even her story got a bit bleak for me!

Having said that, it's well written, but could have been more poignant and had more impact had the narrative just focused on one character. So, overall, a bit of a mixed bag for me.

With thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for an ARC.

This book took a while to get into and I wasn't sure I was going to like it but it turned out to be such a rich character study of two people at completely different points in their lives that I couldn't stop reading it.

It follows Ruth, a woman who doesn't know if her husband Aidan is going to leave her after they grow apart when they struggle to conceive. It also follows Pen, an autistic 16 year old with a crush on her best friend Alice. The book takes us through a day in Ruth and Pen's lives, where they cross paths twice.

I just found it really, really emotional and real the whole way through. Ruth and Pen are in such different situations but they are also so linked. Ah, I think I'll be thinking about these characters for a while.

This is a wonderful read which stayed with me long after reading. I had the same experience with Pine's non-fiction Notes to Self and this work harnasses the same method of understated but compelling drawing of characters' internal dialogue. I defy anyone to stop reading in the sequence where Pen makes her way across Dublin to the NCH, her internal journey matched to the landmarks along the way was one of the best pieces of writing I have read in a long time.

I identified much more with one character than the other and my only quibble is that I became impatient to get back to her story although both stories were gripping. It makes me wonder if they were so well-drawn, maybe each warranted a book of its own?

Having said that I would urge everyone to read every word Pine writes - the rewards are many. Highly recommended.

Thank you to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the ARC

One day, one city, two women: Ruth and Pen. Neither knows the other, but both are asking the same questions: how to be with others and how, when the world won't make space for you, to be with yourself?

Ruth's marriage to Aidan is in crisis. Today she needs to make a choice - to stay or not to stay, to take the risk of reaching out, or to pull up the drawbridge.

For teenage Pen, today is the day the words will flow, and she will speak her truth to Alice, to ask for what she so desperately wants.

The word building was phenomenal in this book. Here I forgot about my own life and was immersed in the world created by the author. I would recommend this book.

Simply wonderful.
It took me a couple of goes to get into this but I'm so glad I did. Such a wonderful, human story. It follows a day in the life of a teenage girl Pen & a psychologist Ruth, The characters are brought to life so vividly, their emotions are so palpable through the writing. There are times I couldn't bare to acknowledge what they were feeling. Having teenage daughters this brings me back to how deeply you can feel mixed with confusion and sadness when you're finding your way through those years. Ruth's marriage to Aidan is struggling and I found myself wanting so much for them to make it and have their happy ending. The writing in this book , like Notes to Self is perfect at conveying human emotion and so relatable. A wonderful novel I read in one sitting.

This book featured in the 2022 version of the influential annual Observer Best Debut Novelist feature (past years have included Natasha Brown, Caleb Azumah Nelson, Douglas Stuart, Sally Rooney and Gail Honeyman among many others).

The author - Emile Pine - is an academic (Professor of Modern Drama at University College Dublin), whose previous publication - “Notes to Self” - a series of deeply personal essays exploring topic including infertility, miscarriage, menstruation and family alcoholism originally published by the brilliant Tramp Press in Ireland - won the 2018 Irish Book of the Year award and went on to become something of an international bestseller.

This, her debut novel, shares a concentration on interior voices and also explores some very similar topics to her essays.

The book is set over a single day in 2019, on the day of the worldwide climate change protests (which took place on 7 December of that year).

The novel follows two largely separate storylines (based around each of the titular characters).

Pen is a neuro-diverse sixteen-year old, still struggling with the aftermath of a bullying event at school and her subsequent relapse into self-cutting - something she explores both with her divorced mother (a University lecturer) and her unnamed therapist. Her one true friend is Alice and she has agreed with Alice to bunk off school and attend the climate change protests, having meticulously planned (without Alice’s knowledge) to turn the day, including a surprise invite to an evening concert, into a first date.

Ruth is in her mid-thirties, married to Aidan but with their marriage straining up to the precipice of dissolution, under the strain of a series of failed attempts at IVF, including a miscarriage of the most successful attempt. Ruth is building a growing therapy practice - her practice partner and closest friend off on maternity leave. On the day Aidan has unexpectedly stayed over in London the night after a business trip, and while he makes his way back Ruth has to go alone to a hospital check up on uterine fibroids.

I must admit I found that both storylines took their time to interest me. Pen’s initial sections - with details of her bullying and of her habits (stimming, an obsession with Latin and with English idioms), as well as her beliefs around the urgency of climate action, felt rather over-familiar from teenage fiction. And Ruth’s sections seemed to lack any real draw.

This did improve over time - mainly I felt as we also got to explore the interior viewpoints of Alice (who has her own wants and struggles - particularly around the very concept of being touched by others) and of Aidan (himself really struggling with both the increasing reality of his and Ruth’s inability to have children and with what he perceives to be Ruth’s passive acceptance of that situation)

The stories overlap physically via a couple of encounters which are I would say pleasingly fleeting but still importantly empathetic.

What is more impressive is how the storylines increasingly overlap thematically.

Ultimately, via both major characters but also via the Alice and Aidan, this is a book around the ideas of: consequential/milestone life decisions; of how to mentally and verbally explore complex and ambiguous feelings; and most of all of how to shape (particularly female) self-identity when one’s aspired identity is challenged both by circumstances and by the equally difficult identity choices of others.

Overall this is an interesting novel which rewards perseverance.

Emilie Pine's beautiful character driven debut novel immerses the reader in the lives of Ruth Ryan, a counsellor who has focused on building the success of her practice, and 16 year old Pen who lives with her wonderful mother, Claire and younger sister, Soraya. Pen is autistic, someone for whom words does not come easy, more at home in the world of texts and emojis. We follow their lives over one day, 7th October 2019 in a Dublin hosting a climate protest that Pen has taken a day off school to attend with her best friend, Alice. Today is the day Pen is going to take a huge risk, being open, making herself vulnerable, she is going to find the words to tell Alice how she feels about her, as far as she is concerned she is going on a date with Alice, even if Alice doesn't know it. You can feel her ever increasing state of excitement, the way she is loaded with the intensity of her expectations, and all too aware that it is unlikely to end well.

We note how broken and raw Ruth feels as we observe just what it takes to get her up and out of her front door, the harrowing pain and anguish of IVF treatment failures, the price it has exacted on her body, her mental health, and now leaving her marriage to Aidan in a state of crisis. Aidan has been cold for some time, is away on a business trip, and choosing not to return immediately, trapped in his own personal state of grief. We learn of how difficult Ruth and Pen find it connecting with others, and their loneliness. It is heartbreaking to see Pen's desperation to not be 'special' and fit in at school, the cruelties of other people and an intolerant world that refuses to see her as 'normal'. This state of affairs is replicated in Ruth, Ruth and Pen are different, in a complicated world where there is no such thing as normal, who and what they are should be normal.

Ruth is there when Pen is experiencing an 'episode' at the gallery, playing an instrumental role in helping her cope. Pen's mother, Claire, is a standout character, her love for Pen shines through, and her wisdom is extraordinary, such as 'You don't always get the thing you wanted.....You get something else instead', this applies to herself, Pen, Ruth and Aidan. This is a superb debut, Pine gets under the skin of her characters of Ruth and Pen, as she astutely paints a picture of the complexities of their interior lives and what it means to not be like others. Ultimately this is an uplifting read as we follow what happens through to the conclusion of the story. A brilliant read that I highly recommend. Many thanks to the publisher for an ARC.

NetGalley review Ruth and Pen


One day, one city, two women: Ruth and Pen.

Ruth is a counsellor: Ruth's marriage to Aidan is on the rocks. Does she stay or does she leave. Will their loss and journey bring them back together? 

Pen is a teenager. For Pen, today is the day she will tell Alice the truth and what she desperately wants. They are going together to a climate change protest march on the same day that Ruth is going for a check up at the hospital. 

I’ll be honest, because that’s what I’m meant to do when reviewing books, I really couldn’t get into this book and I almost gave up with it halfway through. The character of Pen was confusing to me. Ruth and Aidan, whilst I felt for them and for their loss, I just couldn’t find myself liking them. This book just wasn’t for me but someone else will absolutely love it.

I loved Emilie Pine's essays Notes to Self and, while Ruth & Pen is a novel, it contains all of the same beauty of Pine's writing style. Set over the course of a day in Dublin, the story follows the titular characters who are unknown to each other but, dealing with the same questions on the same day. Intelligent, emotional and funny.

I loved Emilie Pine's "Notes to Self" a book of personal essays that I would recommend to anyone so absolutely wanted to read her first fictional novel.
Ruth & Pen is a beautiful and sometimes heartbreaking character study over the course of a day in Dublin.
Ruth is a therapist whose marriage is at breaking point as she awaits the return of her husband from a business trip. Pen is a neurodiverse teenager who has feelings for her friend Alice and plans to finally express them to her as they attend a climate protest together.
This is a deeply emotional story for both characters as we follow them through a seemingly normal day but is momentous for both of them. Ruth's story is extremely raw at times as we learn about her infertility and the toll it has taken on her relationship with Aidan. Pen is going through first love like many other teenagers but for her it is more difficult to openly express these feelings. Pen is a wonderful person and the importance of her relationship with her mother, who understands and loves her most is beautiful.
Their stories intersect briefly at times but doesn't seem forced and there is a particulary amazing scene between them.
I would highly recommend this book and cannot wait to see what else Emilie Pine has to offer

Thank you to Netgalley, the author and publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

A great debut novel and as the blurb says 2 ladies on a single day, one a School child just the other a married lady facing big challenges. Both are special in a good way I think but then you will love them both I hope Emilie writing made me this way.

The story starts on what is a big day for them both, they meet people and this affects their moods, well they always do. I'm giving it 5stars because I it to me away from life escaping into theirs. Pen and Ruth are the 2 Stars and Aidan and Alice the Co Stars with some interesting others that grow into the story, for that to make sense you need to read the novel. No spoilers here.

So yes I recommend this and yes I hope you will enjoy it as well.

I really enjoyed this novel following the same day in the life of two very different women, the titular Ruth and Pen. I was a huge fan of Emilie Pine’s Notes to Self and some similar themes are discussed here, particularly infertility and involuntary childlessness. There are some very emotional topics across both sections of the book but it’s also very funny in places. I was also pleasantly surprised by the points of intersection between the two stories. Highly recommended and thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.

TW: Miscarriage, self-harm

Ruth & Pen follows both characters over the course of one day in Dublin. Ruth is facing uncertainty over her marriage after failed IVF cycles and sixteen-year-old Pen is preparing to bunk off school with Alice.

I thoroughly enjoyed this and finished it within 48 hours. Emilie Pine brilliantly weaves together themes of communication, female relationships and love. This is an emotional read - the pain and loss of failed IVF cycles and miscarriage and the frustration that comes with making connections when you're neurodiverse. Motherhood was explored through both characters and was written with tenderness and honesty. I very much enjoyed the portrayal of the male perspective of IVF, a view that is rarely shared in mainstream media.

I've already ordered Pine's previous essay collection and look forward to any future fiction from her.