Susanna Abse is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist with over 30 years of experience. These are stories about people she has counselled over the years. While the title suggests that this is a book about love it is really about relationships and human interactions. That actually includes the therapist herself who reflects on the impact her clients have on her.

This is a first for me by the author and one I enjoyed and would read more of their work. The book cover is eye-catching and appealing and would spark my interest if in a bookshop. Thank you very much to the author, publisher and Netgalley for this ARC.

I really enjoyed this book. Linking the couples talked about in this book to fairytales really helps the reader to understand the problems and dilemmas the couples were faced with. You might be wanting a clear, solid ending for each couple but that's not how life works. Many people finish the therpay without actually confronting the issues they came with and no self-realisation is done.

Great book and so bingeable, the author really grabs your interest with the couple's stories. I did find myself wondering how different she had made the stories (for anonymity) and what was real and what wasn't, but it didn't distract too much from the message of the couples' issues and how they approached difficulties.

Really enjoyed seeing the world of couples therapy through the eyes of the author.She shares with us her patients there different issues and her way of listening to them suggesting how to deal with their issues problems and hopefully heal and come together.#netgalley #eburypublishing

I'm always fascinated by trying to understand human behaviour, and this book unlocks some answers to the patterns we seem to repeat in intimate relationships. Using composite real life case histories from couples psychotherapy, we gain an insight into the fears, defensive mechanisms and misunderstandings that lead to conflict, betrayal and confusion. And with understanding can come enlightenment. Some very interesting points about childhood experiences being reenacted in intimate relationships, which makes complete sense to me.

I'm always drawn to the stories from the therapist's office, especially those, who work with a different modality than myself. "Tell Me the Truth About Love" by Susanna Abse is a collection of case studies from her practice as a psychoanalytical therapist, and what connects them is a subject of love and relationships: seeking them, maintaining them as well as grieving losing them.

The selection of stories is very interesting and diverse. As readers we are able to grasp the entire process, from the moment that a certain client booked an appointment until the moment the therapy ended. The endings were especially interesting for me as a mental health practitioner, as they were so relatable: sometimes as therapists we have the privilege of accompanying clients until they are in a good enough place so they don't need our support anymore, but sometimes therapies end abruptly when clients simply disappear. It was so refreshing to have an insight of the feelings of Susanna Abse herself, especially regarding the latter.

What bothered me about this book, was how much emphasis the author puts on the looks of her clients, as her observations mostly came out as quite judge-y. That was especially visible when Abse was describing a fat couple she worked with, and it was very hard not to spot deeply fat-phobic tones in her writing. Because of this, I was wondering if the publisher has hired any sensitivity readers whilst working on this book. In my opinion, in any publications that deal with mental health and well-being, potentially triggering wording should be avoided. Because of this, as a person who struggles with their body image, I wouldn't feel safe in Abse's office. Sometimes it's better to keep such judgements to ourselves and work on their impact on our work with vulnerable people.

An interesting look at love, the science and mystery of how and why it happens, what happens when we lose it and how to find the will to start again. It's comforting without being overly sappy.

The types of conflict covered in this book range over misunderstandings, mismatches, arguments, affairs and decisions. Abse’s thesis is that our romantic relationships are modelled on our early family relationships, unconsciously of course, and that this is what can scupper or promote healthy relationships. A lot of her work involves unpicking this and helping people to be more aware, and then to alter their behaviours if they have to / want to. There’s fascinating detail about transference and other psychotherapeutic concepts; there is very little jargon and it’s all explained very well.

I also appreciated the insights into the therapist’s work itself, both with couples and with her own peers and internal work. She is honest about how when she was a new, young therapist she wanted to sort out the whole world, and about how she reacts to people and has to sometimes fight to remain fair and impartial. She shares her mistakes and frustrations. This extends to sections written about the lockdown, when she first caught Covid and then had to adjust to working remotely via Zoom, sharing interesting details about how it was harder to stop warring couples fight when everyone was on a screen.

An honest and open, and also fascinating, read – push on past the worry these are “fairy tales” and inauthentic to see that she uses some metaphors and fairy tale chapter titles to explore real people and feelings. You might find something useful in here, too – I know I did.

My full review here: https://librofulltime.wordpress.com/2022/05/23/book-review-susanna-abse-tell-me-the-truth-about-love/

This was a complete shake up for me and something completely different . My partners mum is a couples therapist so I loved the opportunity to have a glimpse into this world.
This is a beautiful curated book of essays, each essay being based around a couples individual issue or concerns and how/ if it was resolved. Some couples did not have resolutions and some changed their view point and were able to take away a lot of new ideas.
I loved the way the author used the idea of fairy tales as an alternative way of describing the problem the couples faced .
It was so unique and I can’t really think of anything to compare this book to. I think whether you are single, in a new couple or have been with you partner for decades there is something for everyone to take away from this book.
It teaches in an informal , relaxed way that doesn’t feel like a lecture but more like a friendly conversation and shows you not only why we fall in love but how important it is to take a step back and look at relationships in a whole new light.
The only thing I didn’t particularly like is that the story’s didn’t show a lot of emotional connection to the people and it felt a little detached at times. I think this is due to the fact that the author/ therapist had to be detached to a degree during the sessions and that had transferred into the writing a little bit.

Thank you very much @netgalley and @eburybooks for the opportunity to read this book 😍

From 30 years of being a psychotherapist Susanna Abse takes us on a journey of other people's relationships.

Each chapter is inspired by fairytales, nursery rhymes etc. There is Jack and Jill, the evil stepmother to another where Rapunzel wants companionship but appears to be trapped in her tower. 

This book gives you everything from infidelity to why we feel the need to be in love. Overall an interesting insight into love and relationships.

This book was a bit hit and miss with me.
There were chapters that I enjoyed more than others. Some were great, some not so much.
I liked the writing style of Abse, and would be intrigued to see what she does next... but wasn't entirely convinced by this one.

An insight to 30 years of couple counselling. As well as factual cases, it offers her opinion and advice. Suitable for anyone who is nosey like me.

4.5/ 5.0 – rounded up for this delightful read!

Susanna Abse is a psychoanalytic therapist with extensive experience in couple therapy and mental health, and her book, Tell Me the Truth About Love, illustrates 13 stories in her consulting room. I absolutely love most of the stories in this book, and it provides a “completed cycle” of every relationship, from being in love to deciding to have a family. The book is well-written with not just Susanna’s experiences in the field, but also her opinions and occasional knowledge share. This book reminds me the other book “Maybe You Should Talk to Someone” but with a focus in love and relationship. I enjoyed the story a lot, especially the ones with projection (Kristof keeps kissing the frog) and consulting through Zoom during the pandemic (Gabrielle and Johannes Blow the Straw House Down and Then Do Some Rebuilding). The book also presents the personal growth of Susanna over the years, from a trainee to a well-known name in the field. Overall, if you like good stories (who doesn’t), this book is for you.

Highly recommend this one to non-fiction lovers, and it probably would prevent some couples from going through couple therapy.

If you are looking for how to work through your relationships and gain insights into trust etc then this isn't really the book. I found it depressing that many of the couples could not be helped despite months of sessions and at cost. I was disappointed.

Case studies from a psychoanalyst with a specialist in couples therapy.
A lot of books leave us with the happy ending but we realise real life has it's up and downs. Through various real life couples sessions detailed in a chatty and informative style. Makes the issues interesting and relatable from clients and analysts point of view.
I really enjoyed this book.

The 'cases' in this book are inspired by thousands of different people she has met over the years. With ethics in mind, they aren't about specific couples but
almost like a round up of some of the trials and tribulations people in relationships go through. Abse titles the cases like fairytales, which I love. A lot of us
strive for that "fairytale" romance which can lead to the issues that Abse covers in this book.
If you are particularly interested in human
interactions and behaviours, then this book is for you. As someone who has previously worked in therapeutic environments, I was enthralled by some of the interactions between couples in this book, and was intrigued to see how the therapist unravelled some of the problems they had.
Abse always links these cases to theories in psychology but explains them in a way so thorough that you don't need any prior experience to understand it! I find it fascinating and if you work with or study psychology, this would be a beneficial
book to have on hand to refer to, even if just for inspiration.
The story "The Fates Conspire, and Rapunzel Lets Down Her Hair" was particularly interesting to me. Sometimes I had clients that seemed to push the
therapist/client boundaries and exploration was needed to see why this happened. This story is a great example of that and I'm sure anyone who works in this field can relate.
Definitely give this a read if people fascinate you!

A fascinating insight into peoples lives and how they react when it all starts breaking down. There was a real sadness in these stories of couples who didn’t know how to manage their problems and needed the help of a complete stranger to keep them on the right road and help them see what was wrong in their lives.
I found myself touched by these stories and can see what satisfaction the must be gained, when the psychoanalyst is able to reach out and have a positive impact on such negative feelings.
This book is most definitely worth reading. It’s actually quite an eye opener to when relationships fail and how to get help.

A really interesting non-fiction book by Susanna Abse, psychoanalyst. She bases the book around cases she has gathered, observed and counselled during her career as a therapist.
I found the inside look at couples' lives really fascinating - athough sometimes I wished she could have spilled more of the 'gory' details! I loved the story about Julian and Kristoff and thought that this really exemplifies how we, as humans, carry childhood trauma along with us to adults.
I recognised some patterns in my own communication style and hope that this awareness might benefit the relationships I have with my partner and children.
If everyone can't have a therapist, maybe they should read this book, which may point them to a bit more self-awareness on how our actions in relationships have hugely extending ripple effects.
Overall the book was really interesting - a couple of places I wasn't sure the 'reflections on life' connected particularly to the stories they prefaced but maybe that is an English teacher's pickiness!

Thanks to the publishers and Netgalley for an advanced release copy in exchange for an honest review.

In "Tell Me the Truth About Love," Susanna Abse provides the reader with the opportunity to delve into other people's relationship challenges and to read about how the psychoanalyst thinks and feels as she does her best to help them. Using composite case studies Abse shows how relationships find a sense of equilibrium, with each person taking a certain role within them, and how this can become stuck, roles can become unwanted or other factors can alter this careful balance and cause profound distress. Abse also shows how, despite being a well respected expert, the psychoanalyst can also have doubts and uncertainties as they try to listen and help the couple to explore what has brought them to the therapy room.

I really enjoyed this book. Abse comes across as warm, compassionate, and as aware of her failings as she is of the couple's she sees. The case studies include people in all sorts of different types of relationships and in different stages of the life cycle. Not everyone is able to overcome their difficulties, or wishes to pursue long-term psychotherapy, and Abse is human in showing how she sometimes wonders how these people have got on. The case studies are well written and form short stories in themselves (although I wasn't sure the fairy tale theme was needed).

All in all, I think this novel will appeal to therapists, couples and those with a love for programmes such as Married at First Sight, where the experts perception of the relationships is as interesting as the drama! I have already recommended it to one such person!

A psychoanalyst presents a series of case studies, based on many years of being a therapist who counsels couples having relationship difficulties.

There are stories of infidelity, conflict over child care and, of course, a dive into how the childhoods and backgrounds of those seeking help deeply influence how they respond to issues as an adult, even though they may feel unscathed by events from their childhoods.

An interesting book which I'd recommend to anyone who likes to understand how the past can influence the present and how relationship issues can be resolved with patience and understanding. .