Cover Image: Lose You to Find Me

Lose You to Find Me

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Member Reviews

I did not love this as much as Brown’s first novel but the premise was great and I feel it will be loved by many.

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This was seriously cute, and I was so invested in the characters that I didn't really care about the will they - won't they romance, which if I had, admittedly could have ended up being a little annoying, as Gabriel was a difficult character to like.

Tommy meets Gabriel again after Gabriel left one day at summer camp with his parents with no explanation, and Tommy was clearly nursing a long time crush on this guy that he'd put on a pedestal. But you should never meet your heroes.

Gabriel isn't a bad person, but he is messy and I enjoyed his character growth over the course of the book. He's flighty, he's forgetful, he definitely strings Tommy along despite having a boyfriend and it was clear that he and Tommy just were not a good fit.

I loved the chaotic cast of characters, from Tommy's friends who work at a residential restaurant to the customers that frequent it. I ended up really caring about Tommy and his potential future as a chef, so I was happy with the decisions he made at the end of the story.

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AHHHH! This book was so cute. I absolutely adored it. I read it in one sitting and then wanted to read it all over again straight away. I love Erik's writing and can't wait to see what comes next for this author!

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I definitely think that Erik J. Brown is a new auto-buy author. I loved his first book, All That's Left in the World, and now I also love his second book too! This was really sweet and emotional and just so easy to read, I absolutely flew through it. The main takeaway from this book is about figuring out your future, and how it might not be exactly what you had planned but that that's okay, and I really love that. So much of this book is about romance, but so much of it is also about friendship, and the friendships within this book are OUTSTANDING. The characters are all really loveable, and sure they can be messy and dramatic, but that's part of being seventeen right?

I won't give too much away because spoilers, but I LOVED the ending. It didn't go where I was expecting it to, but once it happened I could totally see how the whole book had led up to it and how it actually worked so well for the characters. This book is ultimately about finding yourself, and I think the author writes YA so brilliantly, I can't wait to see what their next book will be.

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Tommy knows what he wants - to go to the same elite culinary school his dad attended, and to date his childhood crush, Gabe. But places are limited on the program, his boss is holding her recommendation hostage, and Gabe has a boyfriend, and worse, doesn’t remember meeting Tommy before!

A sweet and surprisingly moving coming of age story about loss, longing, and letting go of expectations.

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While I did really enjoy the back and forth nature of the main relationship that drives the plot, by the end the protagonist made some out of character decisions and overall I wish the ending was more drawn out and developed; as it is, while I enjoyed the book I did find it more frustrating than cute, which I don't usually find with similar stories.

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Once again there is a book by Erik J. Brown that I loved!

I loved all the characters, they all had their own personalities, likes and dislikes, goals and achievements. If really felt like the characters were real people!

I loved seeing Tommy and Gabe’s relationship grow, I loved all the will-they-won’t-they moments, and I particularly loved the ending!

This book covers a lot from dreams and aspirations, past life experiences, losing people, finding people, and learning that your wants change and that’s okay, learning that things don’t always work out the way you’d want them to - and that’s okay!

I would love a sequel to see where all the characters end up, I think there is still a lot that could be explored with the characters, especially due to what all the characters choose to do after senior year ends! (I am really trying to avoid spoilers here)

Overall, I an giving Lose You To Find Me 5 stars and I can’t wait to see what else Erik J. Brown comes out with!!

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In short: If Erik J. Brown writes it, I will in fact be reading it.

I read an eARC of All That’s Left In The World last year and i absolutely loved it, so of course i jumped at the chance to read this one and i’m so glad that i did! Lose You to Find Me absolutely exceeded my expectations in every way.

I really liked how this book was set in a work environment! The retirement community setting was actually very enjoyable, and i liked seeing all of the interactions with the residents, especially Al and Willa!

Erik J. Brown KNOWS how to write realistic, imperfect characters with believable dialogue. The characters in this book were all developed really well with distinct personalities, and the relationships were messy and flawed which made them even more realistic. It’s difficult to explain without spoiling anything, but i just have to say that i really really loved how everything concluded with the relationships, and i’m so glad that it went in the direction that i was hoping it would.

This entire book was just a pleasure to read. It was warm, comforting and extremely funny. It shows you how dreams can change, and that’s completely okay!

Lose You to Find Me is a book about growing and finding yourself, and If you’re reading this review, I truly hope that you find yourself. At the bookstore- buying this book.


Thank you so much to Hachette Children’s Books and Netgalley for sending me an eARC of this book!!

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I may have had preconceptions going in (although given that I very much just stumbled across this, I don't know where from) but Brown blasted them out of the water, going above and beyond. Sure, the plotline at its core is simple and nothing to set the world alight alone, but Brown's characters are carefully crafted, relatable, diverse, and above all realistic. Thus, not only is the story accessible but also one that offers representation to those that don't typically see themselves in such books. Plus (and bear with me as it's hard to articulate clearly without spoiling anything) the development and ending of the different story strands don't try to sell the "if you do everything well, it will all turn out as it should" message, but in a way that is optimistic and positive whilst keeping that sense of realism.

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There is nothing Erik can do wrong!

I absolutely loved this. The inter connecting relationships, the banter between the teenagers and the residents. Everything!

Erik has a way of making you fall in love with the characters and constantly make you route for them.

I can’t wait to read more!

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Tommy Dees is on the precipice of the rest of his life, but before he can take the leap he needs to figure out what he truly wants. What he thinks he wants is a place at a top culinary school and Gabe, a boy he met at camp when he was 11 and hasn't seen again until now. Gabe starts working at Sunset Estates, the retirement home where Tommy is a server and the person chosen to train the new recruit. Gabe doesn't seem to remember Tommy at all. To save himself the embarrassment of being forgotten, Tommy acts like they never met, but really he's been pining after this boy for years.

Brown creates some loveable characters here and I was rooting for Tommy throughout. Gabe wasn't fully convincing as some of his actions didn't make sense with his personality, but then that could have been Brown's way of showing us that Tommy was seeing Gabe with rose-tinted glasses. The dialogue was pretty realistic between Tommy and his friends. This is always an important factor for me because if the characters in a YA novel don't sound like real teenagers, our teenage readers are going to feel a disconnect. As a school librarian I want to get students reading books that feel real and relevant to them, so that they feel less alone with whatever they may be facing. Lose You to Find Me has a great mix of humour, friendship troubles, relationship woes, and lessons to learn about just not being toxic. With a gay character at the centre of the story, and gay love being the focal point, this book challenges stereotypes and celebrates inclusion. I can already feel how popular this will be with many of my older students.

Librarian Lowdown:
The teens in this story are seniors in American high school, meaning they're 17/18
-mildly explicit language
-discussions of and drinking of alcohol
-discussions of and description of sexual acts (nothing too gratuitous but there is a scene in which two characters are grinding on each other and one has a 'boner' and full sex between two male characters is referred to).
-For these reasons I'd say this is suitable for KS4 and above, and possibly only the more mature year 10s

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I am so happy I discovered this author. I loved All that is left in the World and was worried Lose You to Find Me couldn't live up to it. But I was not disappointed. The writing was once again fantastic and the characters, the relationships, and the plot delivered. I can officially call Erik J. Brown a new favorite writer of mine.

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This was a really cute coming of age story, set in a retirement community of all places, and I loved the characters. Al was my absolute favourite, we all need an Al in our lives, he was such riot.
I also especially loved the fact that it didn’t follow the typical narrative path and was a little unexpected.
This is a definite recommendation, it was lovely.

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What I thought would be a simple, childhood friends torn apart, reunited turned into lovers, knocked me over and shocked me.

This book follows the journey of Tommy, an aspiring chef who works at a care home as a dining staff member. Tommy dreams of following in his late father's footsteps and attending a highly respected culinary school, one that one of the managers at the care home worked with. After cutting a deal with the manager for a series of tests in exchange for a letter of recommendation, all Tommy has to do is focus on his job and his application. Sounds simple right? Then in walks the new dining staff member, Gabe. Also known as the boy Tommy attended a summer camp with and Tommy’s first crush.

It follows a simple plot really, Tommy wants to go to school and needs to focus but he also wants to try and win Gabe’s heart. About halfway through, I realised it was going in a different direction and I was not mad about it.

I liked Gabe, I really did. But he gave off quite a few red flags that did not sit well with me. I mean, he led Tommy on whilst knowing he wasn’t single. I understand his relationship was rocky and his boyfriend did turn out to be horrible, but still. Gabe had a complicated past, and Tommy tried his best to be there for him as a friend when he realised about his boyfriend. So I did like Gabe, but I worried because I didn’t want him and Tommy to end up together and I thought that’s the way this book was going, but it didn’t.

Brad, as a character, pops up every now and then, he’s someone in the background that you don’t realise how important they are until suddenly it’s ‘Oh hello’. I liked seeing his hesitance with Tommy, as he slowly began to want to be public, not to hide who he is, and to not just be a secret thing. What I loved about the ending in regards to their relationship is that it wasn’t ‘they’re boyfriends now happily ever after’, it showed that they still had things to get through. It would take time, but they’d get there.
I really really loved Tommy as a narrator. I was rooting for him throughout this book and seeing his growth was amazing. For a moment, he’s dragging his feet, drooling and following after Gabe like a lost puppy, and it did get annoying. I thought, oh god, he’s one of those characters. Then he switched and picked himself back up. He focused on his goals. Tommy’s relationship with Ava was so important and I loved the way he understood his faults and worked to fix them. He’s not a perfect character, he has his flaws, but what’s important is that he was trying to be better.

I liked how this book dealt with grief. Tommy’s father, and his cooking inspiration, has passed away prior to the events of the book. His passing is a big part of Tommy's wanting to attend this particular school. Grief in this book isn’t always crying and sobbing and missing his father. It’s wanting to make them proud, honour their memory, and do the things they never got to do. Ultimately, Tommy did not get into the school, and I was devastated for him. But he still got into an amazing school, and he realised that no matter what, his father would be proud of him.

With a beautiful slow romance, self-discovery and character growth mixed in with a hilarious found-family set-up, characters you love and a narrator you root for, Lose You To Find Me is a perfect summary of this book. Tommy loses things, but he gains things and importantly, he finds himself. Tommy understands what he really wants out of life, and why he wants it. Not for a pretty boy, not for the memory of someone he’s lost, but for himself.

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🥹 < my literal reaction after finishing it.

I absolutely loved this book, even if it didn't go in the direction that i'd expected! I adored all the characters and their friendships - especially Al and Tommy! There's so much growth and development for the characters that it felt much more realistic than YA books usually do. Highly recommend this!

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All That's Left in the World will remain one of my favourite YA reads of all time. Erik J Brown has a special way of writing LGBTQ+ romances that feels at once modern but also timeless. Going into 'Lost You to Find Me' I thought Erik J Brown's writing couldn't get any better, but I was wrong. 'Lose You To Find Me' has the warmth of a fresh loaf of bread, straight out the oven, and is as comforting as a good cup of tea. I thought I knew how the plot was going to go, but right up to the end this book surprised me. Great characters and compelling relationships throughout. This book shows you that young romances don't always work out, but that it doesn't really matter in the end. A wondrous read.

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Thank you to NetGalley and Hachette for the ARC.

All That’s Left in the World was up there in my favourite reads of last year, so when I saw that Erik J. Brown was releasing another book, I knew I had to get my hands on a copy!

I loved this book! It’s heart-warming and emotional and all those things you want from a queer coming-of-age/romance novel.

LYTFM has a brilliant cast of characters and you will fall in love with all of them! Each one of them, down to the most periphery feels full developed and important to the story. I feel like a lot of that has to do with the worlds that Brown creates. I’ve never wanted to be waiting staff but damn it if I want to do a shift at Sunset Estates! I want to visit the ice cream shop and go to a party at Gabes, and having read this book, I feel like I have! My particular favourite characters were Al and Willa, and Brad (what can I say, I’m a sucker for a closeted hockey player.)

Did I work out who Tommy was going to end up with as soon I was introduced to that character? Yes. But that’s not Brown’s fault. I devour romance books, particularly queer romance, so it was easy for me to work it out with my knowledge of the genre. That said, it didn’t detract from my enjoyment of the story at all and there were times when he had me doubting my theory. I loved reading along to see how Tommy’s love life was going to end up and the ending didn’t disappoint! I was left feeling all warm and fuzzy inside and would happily read a sequel set at college (please…pretty please!)

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Lose You to Find Me is a young adult novel about a seventeen-year-old boy with a job as a server in a retirement community who is trying to get into a top culinary school, but gets distracted by the reappearance of his childhood crush. Tommy desperately wants to go to the culinary school that his dad went to, as cooking was the thing they bonded over before his dad passed away, but to do that, he needs a recommendation letter from his tough boss, Natalie. She wants him to train up the new server, Gabe, who Tommy knew as a child over one summer and then never saw again. As Tommy is distracted by Gabe, who he know realises was his first crush, will he be able to balance everything and work out what he is doing after graduation?

I was interested in this book as I enjoyed Brown's previous YA novel, All That's Left in the World, though this is a very different book to that one, with more of a focus on romance and getting into college than the apocalypse. What makes this book stand out, however, is the plotline, and the way in which it offers a more compelling story than many queer YA romances. Though I guessed where the book would end up, I also hoped that would be the case, as the narrative gave the characters space to make mistakes, change their mind, and see that decisions you made when you're a child don't have to be lasting ones, especially around your future.

The retirement community element is a highlight, with a large cast of fun characters appearing and a sense of community amongst staff and residents that, despite Tommy's drama whilst working there, is a rosy look at the job. In general, there's also lots of friendship (and Tommy's surrogate queer grandparents amongst the residents) in the book alongside the romance and it has that feel good, people are there for you sense that lots of people like in YA fiction.

I'm not the target audience for this book, but I enjoyed the narrative, especially where the romance plot went, and the focus on, as the title suggests, finding yourself and letting your dreams change with you.

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This was a very sweet coming of age story, focusing on one of the best kinds of found family--the workplace kind.
Brown's narration throughout made this a compelling read, and it's something that really shines in his writing. I sped through this in a number of hours, and it is a true testament to his writing style.
What I enjoyed most about this book, though, was the way it subverted my expectations, but not in an overly obvious or annoying way. Though they irritated me sometimes, the choices the characters made felt very natural and real, and with characters of this age I think it's so important to show the less black/white parts of life.
While I enjoyed the interactions with some of the residents more than I initially expected, I will say that the constant setting of the restaurant did feel slightly dragging at times, as we jumped from one scene there to the next, though I understand that is an inevitability in a book like this.

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This was very high on my most anticipated releases of the year, and I was not disappointed. The story touched on a lot of difficult topics, but was really cohesive, and well structured. Whilst grief and loss were huge themes, they were subtle and didn't overshadow the story.

The setting was interesting and fresh for the genre, I preferred that it was set more in the workspace than school, because it really highlighted the characters and boosted the story. Admittedly, I wasn't a huge fan of Tommy's character at first, and that was largely because of the cheating and disregard for other people's feelings, but really admired the character growth that he went through and eventually ended up warming to him.

Every character had a definitive, and separate personality so it was easy to see each character individually, especially with the residents in the home, they weren't all the same grumpy old stereotype. Characters that weren't central to the plot were still memorable and likable and the friendship dynamic was perfectly captured. The whole book was very cute, and an enjoyable read, that has easily become a new favourite that I cannot wait to own and read again.

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