This is a gorgeous exploration of life. A true coming of age story that yearns to be read. I really enjoyed parts of it, but others just felt rushed. You can’t take away from this book however that you’ll be gripped by the story and the voice.

4,5

Raw and tender at the same time, this novel/memoir tells the story of growing up queer in a working class district in 1980s Madrid. It grew on me and then it touched me and I couldn't put it away.

Alana tells her story through the big-hearted women that she looked up to and that guided and taught her on her extremely hard journey as a trans woman.

It is one of those novels/memoirs that really manages to transmit all the doubts, feelings, inevitabilities and injustices. In that sense it reminded me of Edouard Louis.

Some reviewers say this should be mandatory reading and I would definitely support that - an important book!

Many thanks to the publisher and to Netgalley for the ARC.

Described as a staggering coming-of-age novel, deeply rooted in the class struggles of a trans woman growing up in Madrid in the last decades of the twentieth century, I went into this novel with high expectations - which were not only met, but far surpassed.

This novel is just heartrending. A lyrical, emotive fever dream, that whisks you to the setting and immerses you fully in the heartbreak of the era. Perfect for fans of Jennifer Clement.

I would give Bad Habit more than five stars if it were possible. It is an achingly beautiful book of love and loss, yet throughout it maintains a feeling of hope. The sheer amount of emotion conveyed in what's a relatively short novel is incredible.

Alana Portero transported me to Madrid, bringing it to life via vivid depictions of the local neighbourhoods and communities therein. The young trans narrator is so well-realised, I was completely invested in her story.

Bad Habit tenderly explores the narrator's struggle for self-acceptance. She sees the path ahead of her, well-trodden by her neighbour Margarita and, later in the book, Eugenia, as fraught with challenges, and this is, understandably, terrifying. I found the depictions of the older trans women heartbreakingly beautiful; Portero describes them reverentially, according them the respect they seldom gained from their communities.

I wish that anyone harbouring anti-trans views could read this novel and maybe then they would develop some understanding and compassion towards people who are simply trying to exist as they are in this world.

How can I not give this 5 stars? The writing is immaculate and exquisite. And it destroyed me emotionally. The trans narrator is unnamed, but one of the most memorable for sure. And oh the people of the community (in the working class Madrid during 80’s-90’s) are memorable too. Her parents too. They all had a hard life but there was so much love and support to one another. The narrator witnessed it all and observed and learned from them. The comminity became a large part of her.

I can think of Shaggie Bain as a book similar to this. But I prefer this. I found SB quite bleak and too sad. Bad Habits have warmth and hope. It is more inspiring and empowering. The tranlation didn’t feel like translation at all as the words and language flew so elegantly. The translator did a wonderful job.

Really hope this book does well when it comes out. It deserves praise!

Such an emotional and brilliantly written novel. The way that Alana has written our unknown narrator in such a way that even though we don't know their name, we find ourselves utterly attached to them. We smile for them, and we cry for them. Bad Habit is such a powerful and absorbing novel, that I really wish 8 had savoured rather than fly through.

Heartbreaking and sincere novel about the author’s experience as a trans woman in a poor area in Spain. Violence, dreams, family love and death. A must read.

"Before you get the chance to define yourself, others trace your outline with their prejudices and their aggressions."

This is an incredibly emotional and moving coming of age story of a young trans girl growing up in a working class area of Madrid in the 80's and 90's, with the rippling effects of Franco's dictatorship still felt in the culture and attitudes of the population.

The translation is phenomenal, while still feeling so Spanish. I grew up in Spain and seeing depictions of the culture I'm familiar with was weirdly comforting in a way that I often don't get from books set in the UK.

The book is truly beautiful, a love letter to women, queer family and community, but also a book with a lot of pain and anger within it. I really loved it and will think about it often.

A trans woman’s coming of age story, set in late 90s Madrid. This has garnered a lot of comparisons to Almodovar and it’s not hard to see why - themes of queerness and acceptance are detailed in a frank and moving way here, and the Spanish setting is absolutely felt in every chapter. The novel is told in a series of short chapters centred on individual events or characters, rather than a single plot which flows from one chapter to the next, which I found made the novel feel a little fragmented and hard to totally lose myself in. There are however a lot of really beautiful moments - the monologue an elder trans woman and mentor gives the protagonist about her switching from male-presenting to female-presenting and back within 10 minutes, and the toll this is clearly taking on her, is particularly effective - and interesting character work which make this a worthwhile read.

This is an achingly tender story, structured like a memoir, of a trans woman's coming of age. Set in a working class area of Madrid in the 1980s forwards, this has something of the vibe of [book:My Brilliant Friend|35036409] with added queerness.

The writing is frequently gorgeous, the voice alternates between the sassy and the oppressed, and characters are delineated with impressive vividness, even when they are only sketched in like a bar owner, Antonio, in the gay district with his photos of all his beloved friends lost to, it's implied, AIDS/HIV.

There's so much pain, confusion and anguish in this book but the suffering is offset by the love of the narrator's parents, her brother, and her own joy in beauty. Margarita is a standout character whose own tragic constraints serve as both conduit for the narrator's healing compassion and catalyst for her own final embracing of herself.

Lyrical, big-hearted and involving, this feels like a breakthrough voice that we don't often hear in mainstream literature.

Bad Habit is a novel about a working class trans woman growing up in Madrid and navigating communities and places, death and violence. The unnamed narrator grows up from a young child barely able to understand why she's drawn to groups of women and to the one trans woman in the neighbourhood, to a teenager living with the weight of hidden first love, and then an adult finding and losing community, and then returning to her original neighbourhood and someone she never knew well enough before. All the while, she grapples with how to live as herself amidst the violence of being working class and different.

Translated from Spanish, this is a lyrical novel and the translation really captures this, moving through scenes in sometimes a hazy way, a remembered way, and also a constructed way, as the protagonist builds up a mythology for herself, her neighbourhood, and the people around her. The narrative focuses around particular moments and scenes in her life, rather than a main story, and it has a coming of age feel, as she discovers forms of sisterhood and community even whilst a lot of her connections with people are fleeting. By the ending, this becomes a memorable concluding vision, bringing with it an idea running throughout the book: that we are and become part of a lineage, that the people and stories that come before are important, and also why we must keep going.

This is a beautiful novel that depict darkness and violence, but also connection and forms of community, and particularly the importance and complexity of finding role models as a trans woman growing up. It questions putting people on a pedestal whilst also acknowledging it can be hard to avoid when you need proof that you have a future and can exist in, or outside of, society.

Bad Habit follows a young trans woman through her life in Madrid. She's seen many people die, including those in the queer community, and is scared. She finds support from sex workers and queer friends, and quickly grows attached to these people.

Unfortunately, despite the rave reviews I didn't enjoy this book. It felt like a chore to get through. I think it's predominantly the writing style but there were only a few sections (usually when she's with the supportive people) that I found enjoyable. I enjoyed the communities, and the almost mother/daughter relationship explored towards the end. There are a lot of triggers, and I'd definitely suggest looking these up before reading. Overall, it felt heavy from both content and prose, and not quite what I expected from the cover and description. Thank you to netgalley for the arc.