The story of three friends - young Nigerian women in their 30s, trying to survive and find happiness in a chaotic environment. Ego went to the UK to study and stayed there, running away from personal trauma, and is struggling to find her place in an environment she perceives to be hostile to immigrants. Zina is an aspiring actress, who tries to build her life she wants, in a society that elevates marriage and children above all else as a means to self realisation for women. Erife is trying her hardest to adhere to the expectations set upon her and play the game of what success should be, but struggles with the compromises this entails.

The story covers several years of the life of the three friends, and is engagingly written, with vivid characters that jump out of the page. The surface narrative acts as a vehicle to discuss several serious topics - the role of women in Nigerian society, corruption, class struggles, the role of politics, the legacy of colonialism in Nigeria, the role of religion in contemporary Nigerian life, and, finally, the structure of families and familial happiness. All these topics are presented in a just way, and are intertwined smoothly with each other and the main plot line, coming across as natural and topical. There is very little moralising (if at all), and the book, therefore, becomes a fascinating, engaging, and realistic window into contemporary Nigeria.

I struggle to point to things I disliked. I liked all the aspects of the story, and Ego's story is perhaps the most well written and shocking in its psychological analysis and character development. I wish, perhaps, that the story had even more oomph. It's great, but if I compare to some of it predecessors in style (e.g., Makioka Sisters by Tanizaki) it tends to be more descriptive than analytical, and I would have loved to explore more of the underlying layers of the characters' realities.

Highly recommended to anyone interested in Nigeria (and Africa more broadly), the evolving role of woman (and the differences in their fate between the West and the rest of the world), and family sagas.

My thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with an early copy of this book in return for an honest review.

The cover drew me in, and didn't disappoint. We Were Girls Once is the story of three childhood friends, whose lives grow and diverge across decades and continents.

I liked the exploration of friendship, and how people support each other through difficult times.

It left me wanting more...

a compelling novel that follows three Nigerian women, their work lives and their personal ones. i did find the inclusion of twitter posts and so on repetitive and not particularly relevant in that their meaning (the bigoted, white nationalist and anti-immigration sentiments) could have been conveyed without them having in the actual text. and it didn't help that the narrative adopts a scholarly tone when discussing these, which felt more suited to an op ed.

I will preface my review by saying that I have not read the author's previous book, which apparently features the same characters, and therefore I don't know if my thoughts would be different if I had. That being said, I found this book quite difficult to get into and it didn't feel very well developed in parts. The plot was good and had a lot of potential, and typically would be the kind of thing that I enjoy reading about, but something here was just lacking for me.

3.5🌟

As someone who read the author's debut, I'm just glad that Uju and Akin's love continued to blossom. I love a Yoruba man that beats the allegations😉

Now, moving to the actual story of these women who were girls once; before I get into it, I think it'll be a little hard to talk about this book without referencing "Tomorrow I Become a Woman’" not because I don't think this book can be a stand-alone, but because a lot of perspective was given in this story.

Without giving spoilers, let's get into it: it tells the story of Ego, Zina, and Erlife, three friends whose lives are intertwined by a generational bond from their mothers and grandmothers. Ego struggles with loneliness and identity as a lawyer in the UK, Zina pursues acting at a cost, and Eriife slowly abandons her medical practice and transforms into a politician's wife. Trying to stand the test of time in a changing Nigeria, and the respective growth of each woman, their bond is tested, forcing them to confront their past and new reality.

I love that this was written in separate POVs. I found myself skipping Ego's point of view as a lot of the story was repeated from 'Tomorrow I become a woman." Zina is where the meat is at for me.
The only thing that threw me off in this book is the constant real-life political talk, especially in Eriife's POV. The choice is understandable but not just my cup of tea...ok, maybe I don't care for Eriife as much Lol

This was a brilliant read. Thanks to Simon and Schuster via Net Galley for the ARC.

Whilst this story is about three young Nigerian women and is tied to events in Nigeria's history and politics, young women of any ethnicity will be able to relate to the themes and challenges faced by the principal characters. The novel has an interesting structure which was well executed. Each of the three characters - Ego, Zina and Eriife - narrates a section in turn with the timeline continuing throughout. In my experience it's more common to alternate between narrators or bring in an omniscient third person narrative for a final section, and I liked seeing it done this way instead.

The first and longest narrative is by Ego, a successful lawyer in the UK who feels increasing uncomfortable in her adopted country, and considers returning home despite having fled it for good reasons a decade earlier. A lot of the shared history of the three young women is given in this section - the three having grown up together due to their mothers and even grandmothers also having been best friends. The second section is by Zina, a moderately famous actress and something of a wild child - at least in the eyes of their strict society. Zina continues the story from when Ego returns to Nigeria and the most dramatic events of the 'current' timeline happen in that section. The final and shortest section belongs to Eriife, a doctor who has dedicated her life to her husband's political career, only to realise too late she is disillusioned by the man he has become and his party's actions once in government. Eriife has long since burned her bridges with her two friends and it seems impossible that they will reconcile.

All three are likeable characters that I could really empathise and sympathise with. It's easy to relate to their problems even for a reader who hasn't personally experienced some of them. The sections where Ego is living in the UK during the Brexit referendum make uncomfortable reading for white British readers. You want to believe the ignorant comments of her colleagues are exaggerations for literature but I am sure they are all too accurate and probably far worse is experienced in reality. But Ego also experiences frustration and disillusionment with the corruption she finds in Nigeria on her return. Despite the all the assets the country has, things simply don't seem to run as well as they should, due to the greed and selfishness of a small wealthy elite who hold all the power. It's hard to see what option is better for people like Ego and her friends - go abroad and face a grind of daily low level discrimination or remain/return and feel powerless to make a difference due to ingrained societal attitudes and outright abuse of power.

Despite these weighty themes, it's not a depressing book, and the focus remains on the individual characters and their lives rather than becoming too caught up in bigger political debates. Some stories that mix the personal and political struggle to get the balance, but Odafen never gets distracted into dull exposition or monologue rants as some authors resort to in this type of story.

Overall this is a very well written story with very likeable characters that I really cared about. It covers a wide range of history and politics, both in Nigeria and in the wider world. I enjoyed reading it and I would recommend to any readers who enjoy literary fiction and particularly those who look for stories from a range of cultures and settings. I'm looking forwards to further books by this author.

Thank you to NetGalley and Simon&Schuster UK for the eARC in exchange for an honest review.

I’ve read(listened) to the author’s debut and I was blown away. I came into this book expecting something similar and that was not the case.

This book follows the lives of Ego, Zina and Eriife as they navigate political turmoils and their personal lives.

I felt as though said political turmoils was the forefront of the novel and I was reading how the characters react/live with it. There was a lot of politics to cover and it felt a bit much sometimes… UK, US and Nigeria.

As someone who read tomorrow I become a woman, some parts of Ego’s story felt a bit repetitive.

With that being said, I was glad to see how Ego survived her accident in the prior book and how she healed from all the abuse she endured . I found Zina a refreshing character. I unfortunately did not care for Eriife. Loved that Akin and Uju are infact living their best lives.

This book solidifies the fact that at the end of the day, female friendships will save your life

Aiwanose Odafen, the author of Tomorrow I Become a Woman, returns with We Were Girls Once, the story of three friends from Nigeria whose lives have always been connected with each other, even when they are apart. Now Ego, a lawyer in London, is returning to Lagos and a country which is changing dramatically before their very eyes.

This is an ambitious novels which tackles some very big themes whilst retaining its focus on its three leads. The novel is split into three sections, with a different friend narrating for each. This allows us to gain understanding of who these women are, what makes them tick, and allows us as reader to develop a bond with them.

I have not read her debut - I will now be seeking it out - but based upon this she is a very fine novelist. I enjoyed my time with these characters, and look forward to what Aiwanose Odafen does next.

There were lots of good things about this book. The changing relationships between the three women, and the fact they only switched once for each character, which was a really great way to do it rather than the usual method of switching between each point of view for each chapter, which made the empathy so much stronger for that character once you were in her point of view. The complications of friendships and relationships mixing, and the very harsh realities of assault. I found it some parts a little harder to get into, but I'm glad I read it.

I really, really wanted to fall in love with this book about female friendship but I just couldn't. It tells a story about three friends against a backdrop of Nigerian political history. Sometimes it seemed to work, other times it felt very disconnected and stilted.

I did appreciate how much effort and research went into this, yet I would have liked to see the three main characters have a bit more depth. We're told about their mothers being best friends however it only feels like we ever get to really know Ego's mother. The rest are glossed over, meaning the reader misses out on getting to know the women who came before our characters.

I do deeply recommend Aiwanose's Tomorrow I Become A Woman, her debut was simply outstanding. This book just didn't quite hit the spot.

This is an interesting story about three vibrant female characters from Nigeria.

While Zina, Ego and Eriife's bonds of friendship include an intergenerational legacy from their grandmothers, who arrived in Lagos in the 1940s on the same bus, over time life has taken them in decidedly different directions.

Amidst Nigeria's development, political chaos, opportunities and constraints, all three navigate their own paths. For Zina, uncomfortable in her own skin, success ultimately comes at a high price. Ego leaves the country, but is unable to find satisfaction in her new avatar as a London lawyer, returning home after years abroad. Eriife makes some strange choices, apparently leaving behind her original beliefs, and trading up in material terms.

Yet through it all, and despite years apart, something tugs the trio towards each other still...

This is a story about the ties that bind, the enduring nature of friendship, and the shared experience of womanhood. All set in one the most quirky, diverse and challenging cultures in Africa. Worth a read.