This is so wonderful! I've never read about the challenges of coming out for two Black British boys who are best friends before, and this explores the topic brilliantly. I was so impressed by the level of nuance, complexity and originality here. It really caught and held my attention. The writing is so beautiful and lyrical- I would expect nothing less from Dean.

I loved the theme of 'it takes a village', and the strength of all of the different character relationships. Kai has support from so many different places, and he is able to offer lots of support too, which is heartwarming to read. I especially loved the anti-homophobia from Kai's acquired school friends, and Kai's relationship with his little cousins. At the same time, not all of the dynamics are perfect and I sympathised with Kai's frustrations so much, but equally Dean does a great job of writing believable and sympathetic perspectives for most characters, so you really feel for everyone in different ways. The romance is also adorable!

I've seen reviews saying there isn't much character growth and I don't agree at all. Kai especially develops so much even though it's such a short novel. The only reason I didn't give it 5 stars is that the ending felt a bit abrupt and I would've liked to revisit some of the character relationships one last time to get a sense of closure, especially with Obi and Kai's Mum and Granny.

Overall though, this is just joyous, and I hope it gets into the hands of lots of teens and anyone who needs it.

4.5 stars

Kai is starting back at school torn with wanting to come out and being pressured to stay in the closet by his best friend Matt who isn't ready to come out due to his strictly Christian family. When Kai is inadvertently outed by Matt not on his terms he rolls with it but feels increasingly conflicted between Matt's actions and his growing feelings for him.

I always love Dean Atta’s writing and there’s something unique to telling a story in Verse that manages to capture the heart of the issue in just the right way. There’s definitely a predictable coming out story that can be told and I loved that this as not that. The issues are not Kai’s family and not even the group of friends he’s just acquired ‘The Boys’ the issue is the internalised shame of his best friend - also gay - due to his religious family that is holding him back. And it’s this friendship that he wishes we’re more is at the centre of this.

It’s a beautiful portrayal of love and friendship between Black boys that also deals with prejudice, mixed race heritage, check trigger warnings as it does also deal with SA. I enjoyed small details that subverted the usual stereotypes like the teenagers hanging out at a bouldering club and Kai and his mum running a crystals stall on Sundays. And also the somewhat meta like presence of a non named character called the author ding an author visit in the book. As the characters point out at one stage - not everything is like Heartstopper. This felt really original, powerful and just a teensy bit cute!

I received this arc a while ago and it’s been one of those I saved for ages because I knew I’d love it. There’s something about a novel in verse that always just hits me hard: Dear Mothman, Punching the Air, and (of course) The Black Flamingo. So when I saw Dean Atta was releasing a new book, I was buzzing. Enough of the preamble, onto the review:
Kai knows he’s gay – it’s a fact of life: he’s biracial, he’s an avid reader, he’s in love with his best friend Matt, and he’s gay. That’s a fact for Matt too, though he isn’t so keen to admit it. In masterful verse, Atta weaves a gorgeous narrative about intersectionality, coming-of-age, and finding who you really are – even if it’s difficult.

What I loved about this book is that almost all of the characters annoyed me at some point, which I realise sounds odd. But I cannot stand a story where the characters always make the right choices, or choices that the reader can see themselves making. Kai is quick to anger, Matt tries to dull Kai’s self-expression for fear it will out him by association, Vass is quick to judge. But all of them are characters I like, and I think I like them more for the fact that they feel real. They say things or make choices that feel obviously wrong, not because of some plot-relevant misunderstanding, but because they’re very human and humans are contradictory.

Sadly this book didn't live up to expectations. I absolutely adored Atta's first book so I am always keen for the newest read but this one didn't quite hit the spot. Maybe a case of wrong book wrong time but it felt very jumbled and hard to follow in parts.

Super short and easy quick read for teens and parents!
Apart from that I don’t really have strong feelings about this story. It felt like a bit of slice of life mixed with a coming out story.
I feel like this book raised a lot of important topics for (queer) teenagers, especially how adults interact with them and how to tell who’s really your friend. Race and queerness are always big topics in Dean Attas books and I think it’s important and part of their MCs every day life experience.
But at the same time I feel like a lot of it was surface level because of the books length and the amount of problems that were pushed into it.

I already didn’t love the romance of Deans last book and I feel like this story was exactly the same. A love triangle that was very messy and neither the MC nor the (first) love interest were really my favourite. I like messy characters, especially when they’re teenagers it’s simply realistic, but I felt like they were often short of being mean.


I really would have appreciated a TW, because I was caught off guard, so here’s one for you.
Trigger warning: SA, homophobia, racial profiling

After reading The Black Flamingo a while ago now, I knew if Dean Atta came back with another book in verse, it would be straight on my TBR, and I am so glad that I made that decision after reading this. The story of two best friends figuring out how to be themselves in family dynamics and society where being out is difficult, this book puts you into their shoes brilliantly and poetically.

Both Kai and Matt have a great dynamic on the page from first to last, and I love the development of the friendship group and the connections they make throughout this book. The Boys are very much a group that is 'don't just a book by its cover' kind of people and I love that they have such a strong support group within their school when they feel ready to be able to come out. I can see the glimmers here of things like Heartstopper where those bonds are just as strong in a different way.

Atta's style when it comes to poetry has such a wonderful flow on the page. I really appreciated how he delivers this story and really allows you to feel what is in the minds of the characters even though I wish we did maybe more perspective from the other characters - I really feel this book could have done with Matt's perspective too.

A great book, so glad I got to read this!

(Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC for honest review).

I was obsessed with this! I love novels written in verse and dean atta does it so well. There are so many important themes within this - sexuality, race, sexual assault, privilege - and they're all done so well and it doesn't feel like any of them get lost. I loved the references to other authors like Simon James Green and Mallorie Blackman and the reference to his other character the black flamingo

I definitely don’t gravitate to YA anymore but Dean Atta will always draw my attention.
I was admittedly nervous about this, with such a classic teen title but like Atta’s other books, this was an encapsulating read. Written in their classic verse style, it’s beautifully written and a great intro to books written in verse for young people. I Can’t Even Think Straight reads more like a novel than Atta’s previous works but keeps that classic rhythm.

We follow Kai as he navigates sexuality, homophobia, racial profiling, SA of a friend, friendships and relationships. It’s really well done and is a great coming of age story with some important themes. I definitely recommend it.

Thank you to Hachette Children’s Group and Netgalley for the ARC!

I Can’t Even Think Straight by Dean Atta is a heartfelt, poetic coming-of-age story about Kai, a British Cypriot-Jamaican teen figuring out who he is. He’s crushing on Obi from his bouldering club, trying to support his best mate Matt (who’s got his own stuff going on), and learning how to be there for his non-binary cousin Vass.

Written in free verse, the book feels raw, honest, and easy to read. Like Atta’s earlier book (The Black Flamingo), it dives into identity, family, queerness, friendship, and the awkwardness of growing up—with a lot of heart.

I very much enjoyed how real and relatable it feels. There are some heavier moments (like homophobia and racism), but they’re handled with care and sensitivity.

As with the other books from Dean Atta, this was an incredibly encapsulating read with beautiful flowing writing. I always recommend their books to those who are looking to explore books written in verse.
In this book, we see the main character Kai, navigate sexuality (and sadly homophobia), racial profiling alongside themes of SA. It was a refreshing read seeing a group so supportive of someone’s homosexuality, and shutting down any homophobia. Shout out to Vass who was so incredibly witty and made me laugh so many times!

Although I don’t tend to pick up YA fiction anymore, I do make an exception for Dean Atta. I loved how this was written in verse, just like the Black Flamingo as this is what makes his writing so unique.

"Maybe I'm not all that good. Maybe I just have a cousin who people think of as bad. I should be allowed to make mistakes, too. "

Kai lives in a world only dreamed of by his campaigning forebears (I've just been reading about Marsha P. Johnson - download Marsha from here if you can!) although of course there is no shortage of struggles, too: although there's an amount of wish fulfilment in this YA novel, it's honest about homophobia, racism and assumptions about young people. Kai has Greek Cypriot / Jamaican heritage and so we find him and his cousin Vass, a trans woman, on holiday, both keen on the same guy, before coming back to the UK, the repercussions of Vass' afternoon with Adonis, their shared family and found family and Kai's other family, his Jamaican Granny and his other cousin, T, the bad boy of the family.

Kai also has his best friend Matt at school, but there's tension when Matt doesn't want to come out himself - or Kai to come out as it might affect how people see Matt. Matt's religious Nigerian family and own religion push him away from living his truth, and push Kai away from moving closer to him. He's happy for Kai when he starts dating Obi from bouldering club, but has also bought into a group of popular boys in the summer through going to a boxing class: both the teachers and Kai make assumptions about these boys (they're Black, so they're probably trouble-makers; they're straight so they're probably homophobic respectively), which might just need challenging.

Kai's relationship with his mum, struggling a bit to raise him while working full time and studying, is touching and sweet and any gay or trans kid reading this will feel seen, celebrated and reassured. The novel is described as being "in verse" which was hard to work out in the Kindle version - it's not all rhyming couplets though, definitely, just a bit unorthodox in the way Bernardine Evaristo's "Girl, Woman, Other" was - totally copable with.

Blog review published 17 May 2025: https://librofulltime.wordpress.com/2025/05/17/black-queer-nonfiction-and-fiction-tourmaline-marsha-and-dean-atta-i-cant-even-think-straight/

I love reading books with queer representation and I really enjoyed I Can't Even Think Straight
It was a quick read for me, although I wish some of the characters were developed a little bit more. I will be picking up more books from this author.

So obviously the reason I wanted to read this was because I love queer storytelling. Honestly friends I did not know what I was going to think about this because I've never read a novel written in verse, and I've not read a lot of black MLM romance books. Honestly, I was blown away with this story. This is the first time I've ever read a book that wasn't a graphic novel in the Netgalley app because the send to kindle option did not do this book justice. Everything about the storytelling was visual down to the way the verses were set out and the drawings to accompany them. This story hit on so many important topics, and I would definitely look up the trigger warnings if you're going to read this book but it genuinely handled them in a way that was so beautiful and real. How emotive Kai was all throughout the book really made it easy to empathize with him and the other characters. I laughed through parts of this book, I cried through parts of this book, and I really loved the little references to Dean's other books (which I will 100% be picking up) throughout. I think this type of storytelling is so important and to be able to see more of it really makes my heart full. I would 100% recommend this to anyone and everyone who wants a beautiful queer story to read and I can't wait to read more of Dean's other literature.

I have adored everything that I've ever read from Dean Atta and this new release is no different. Just a joy from start to finish and I can't recommend it enough!

Thank you to NetGalley, the publishers and author for the opportunity to read this book.

I read this book in one sitting. This was my first read by Dean Atta, and I'm now eager to read his other works.

This was such a fast read, especially since it’s written in verse. The lyrical and captivating style made it even more engaging.

In this novel, we follow Kai, a biracial queer teenager who has just come out to his friends at school. This is his journey of self-discovery—understanding his own and others' perspectives and stories—while also navigating self-acceptance, doubts, and flaws.

The book also explores themes of discrimination against Black teenagers, racial profiling, strict parenting, SA, the importance of consent, and homophobia.

I truly enjoyed seeing the group of boys at school being so receptive and accepting of Kai’s coming out. Their support ensured there was no room for discrimination, which was refreshing to read.

Kai's relationship with his best friends was heartwarming. Vass, his non-binary childhood friend, was funny, witty, and unapologetically themselves. It’s so inspiring to read about a teenager who is confident, knows who they are, and isn’t afraid to show it. Shouldn't we all be like them?

I also loved reading about Matt. In the beginning, you wonder if he’s truly a good friend, but as the story unfolds, you grow to understand him. It must be incredibly difficult to be gay in a religious and homophobic household. Matt accepts who he is, but he knows he won’t receive that same acceptance from his church or family. The only time he feels like himself is when he’s with Kai.

Kai's voice felt authentically teenager, so if you don’t enjoy coming-of-age YA books, this may not be for you.

The book briefly touches on the theme of sexual assault (SA), though it is only mentioned, not described in detail.

It highlights the importance of having open, supportive relationships with parents—being able to talk to them about difficult experiences and receive the help needed. As a mother, this is what I aspire to have with my children.

This book felt more like a short story, and I wished some of the themes had been explored in more depth. I also wanted to see more of the dynamics with some of the side characters who were mentioned.

Overall, this was an insightful and important read—an excellent book for queer teens struggling with identity and acceptance. But beyond that, it’s a meaningful read for anyone, showing the beauty of understanding, support, and unconditional acceptance.

As always, Dean Atta has crafted an utterly wonderful YA novel in verse. I loved Kai as the MC and how he perceived and was perceived by other characters - from The Boys to his teachers to his family to his friends.

I enjoyed how the story touched upon so many different experiences that teen readers may have encountered themselves, or be looking to better understand - from the way The Boys were stereotyped and assumptions made about them by the police and teachers to how Vass' assault was handled. I thought having The Boys go against the expectation of what such a lad-ish group would be like to be real allies and supporters or Kai (and Matt) was so good; and how Kai had his own guilt over fancying Adonis to contend with when he learnt what he'd done to Vass.

I also enjoyed the romance element of this book. I liked how, for one, Matt's need to stay closeted wrestled with Kai's desire to be out - how it was made clear that Matt wasn't right to force Kai to stay closeted but also how Kai wouldn't be right to out Matt. I thought that was handled really well and how both sides were really shown in the text through Kai's angel and devil. I enjoyed how Kai went out with Obi - how having someone out and publicly interested in him made him feel and how that made him realise more what he wanted with Matt. I also liked how Matt's discomfort and internalised homophobia was touched upon with how he acted around Kai's out friends (Vass, Obi & Obi's friends). I liked how Kai called Matt out and how clearly Matt has his own journey as we followed Kai's - how Matt was able to slowly open up and reach a point of being out to his friends and starting a relationship with Kai.

I also loved the callback to The Black Flamingo! I love when standalones get brought into an idea of taking places in the same world and I just loved how Vass had Black Flamingo posters. It's so nice to know that Michael is out there doing drag and doing well.

All in all, another incredible novel from Dean Atta. Would highly recommend.

⭐⭐⭐
Rep : Gay MC, Non-Binary SC

"I only act straight when I can concentrate on it. The rest of the time, I'm pretty camp, and a bit of a clown."

🏳️‍🌈Coming out story
❤️‍🩹Messy relationships and friendships

What I Liked
1) I liked Vass talking about their experience of coming out as non-binary as different to coming out about your sexuality as trans/non-binary people are way more attacked at the moment. I think this could make a lot of teens feel seen.

2) Important conversations were brought up about black teen boys hanging out being mistaken for a gang and how racist that is.

3) I liked how the author handled the MCs feelings about his relationships and that red flags can be different to different people. This story can show teens that if a relationship makes them uncomfortable, even if the other person hasn't technically done anything wrong, you should still leave and that the right person will feel safe.

What I Disliked
1) I think the characters needed way more development. Certain characters felt more like they were there to get a message across rather than the character feeling like a real person while also getting the themes and messaging to the reader.

Thank you to Netgalley, Hatchette Children's Group and Dean Atta for this eARC in exchange for an honest review

There's something about Dean Atta's writing that always appeals. I think it's the realism of his stories and the way you can find a way to link to the characters in some way. The Black Flamingo was my introduction to Atta for example, and I've re-read the book several times because it's just that good.

I Can't Even Think Straight is Atta's newest work - due for release May 29th of this year, and it was another wonderful read. Malachi or Kai as he's more often called throughout the book is our main character and I immediately liked his voice as his story unfolds. His story is captivating, with an honesty that Atta has made relatable regardless of the reader’s age, there's a natural blend of humour as well as moments of the story that are thought-provoking and unfortunately all too relatable to many.

This is a story of growth, of self acceptance of someone's sexual identity and place in the world. Kai goes on a journey that begins as many do in the LGBTQ community of being ‘in the closet’ to being himself to both friends and family. As I've said, this is a story that is at its heart, one that has a heavy focus on the realities of the world we're in and I think many teenagers who read the book, will find the journey Kai is on as a recently out, young gay man with all its ups and downs is both joyous and one they too may have begun too or are hoping to begin when ready.

However, it's not just a story of Kai; Atta has given us many other characters who again have a realism to the story. I welcomed the diversity of the characters both in their nationality, gender, sexuality and society/wealth. All of these have an effect on the person you are, and you become as you grow but especially in the case of I Can't Even Think Straight? How each of them sees the world around them as our story unfolds.

The world building is perfect, and even at my age, I recall school especially being one that was hard to be in, how the various cliques can cause issues and how there is always a group like we encounter known as ‘The Boys'. Atta however does offer some refreshing moments alongside the stereotypical and hurtful moments of hostility and homophobia faced in an academic setting. I also welcomed the insight to teachers who make assumptions based on these groups, and how there should be less presumption and more insight by people in authority…

My favourite character is Vass, the nonbinary best friend of Kai. They're perfectly written with none of the stereotypes we often have and I think I'd love a story about them at some point because Vass shines brightly throughout the book.

I will caution early on we do have talk of SA, although the act itself isn't described at all. I feel it is prudent to mention it however as even indirectly it can cause upset to people.

I love this book, I think many will too because once again, Atta has shown his brilliance as an author and storyteller.

TW for reference to a supporting character's sexual assault but in the main 'I Can't Even Think Straight' is a lovely, warm verse read. The Boys felt like real teens, their acceptance & compassion for each other was gorgeous. #KidLitUK #UKYA pub.s in May by @hachettechildrens.bsky.social! #netgalley