Vampires at Sea is a book that has a lot of concepts going for it. It's three characters who vary along a spectrum of unlikability, with rules and mythical traits that seem unclear and strange. It's overall a fascinating read, but was not my favorite. I do think this will do well in the literary fiction realm, though I can't imagine it being for fans of traditional fantasy, or anticipating romantasy. It's not a romantasy, by any means. It's a meditation on ownership, love, and what we all mean to one another. And I think if you go in anticipating that, you'll have a great time.

I had no idea what to expect which this books. It was a short read which was nice. I wanted to give it a try but I don’t think I am the target audience for this book. I am not a fan of vampires (never have been I don’t know why just can’t get into them even though I want to!!) with that said I do think it’s a good read and will recommended it to other who I know would like the characters.

Unhinged, dark, queer and campy. The What We Do In the Shadows vibes really did come through and I enjoyed that element a lot. Vampires at Sea was a quick and weird read for me and it feels like that was exactly what the author was going for.

I had no idea what to expect from this book - as it is so short I went in without reading the synopsis. The cover gives surrealism meets historical fiction but this is definitely not that - it's more of a contemporary horror comedy with a slice of dystopian.
Hugh and Rebekah are ancient vampires (of sorts) and have been married for hundreds of years. They embark upon a queer pleasure cruise to enjoy themselves and feed but are not prepared to encounter a person who entrances both of them and for once they are out of their depths.
The humour is very nudge nudge wink wink "I'm doing satire" which made me roll my eyes sometimes but in an affectionate way. I enjoyed myself a lot! I would recommend reading in one sitting :)
4 stars

1.5 stars out of 5, rounded up.

I do not know what I was expecting when I started Vampires at Sea but not this, for sure.

As you embark on a cruise, following vampire couple Rebekah and Hugh, things quickly go sour when non-binary influencer Heaven, which was meant to be a fun threesome partner, starts ostracizing Hugh from her wife, making her jealous.
What was marketed as a queer cruise quickly becomes the theater to a very heteronormative story, despite its pitch, which was very disappointing. Sure, Heather is non-binary, is described as someone very "fem" while having a beard but that was almost all in the queer aspect of it. And sure, sometimes the story mentions that Hugh had a male partner, sure sometimes we have they/them pronouns, and sure Rebekah seemed to also be bisexual, but... The main plot point being her wanting to keep her husband and wanting revenge on the one that's taking him away from her kinda nullified the queerness of it all, for me.
Moreover, the "war backdrop" felt very unnecessary for such a short story. It adds absolutely nothing to the plot, except a very convenient justification for the fact that no one was in the street they publicly fucked in at one point. When Rebekah asks "lore questions" throughout the narration, she rarely answers them, making up possible answers and such. I get that it's to show that she does not know, but I don't get what it adds to anything if we just perpetually can't have any answers each time a question is brought up. It made the story drag unecessarily and hard to get through, which is a shame to witness in such a short book. This feeling wasn't quelled by the writing, which was a very simple "Subject - verb - object" sentence pattern. This type of writing does not go well with information dumping, turning what's supposed to be a snappy action-packed narration into quicksand you can't get out of.

Adding to all of that, some things said in this book felt very questionable to me. "Some of us really do orgasm pretty easily. Maybe we just have giant clits and no shame, who knows?", for example, is one of them. Brushing over the essentialist aspect of it (a queer book associating female pleasure to clits..., sure?) reading that was puzzling to me. Even though Rebekah is written as this unhinged bitch that's supposed to be somewhat unlikable, I don't think it excuses saying that people who have trouble having an orgasm stems from "shame" or anything. A few lines before that, "They finger me while whole families look on in fully aroused horror.", like... what ? I frankly do not care that the purpose of your book is to be horny, messy, gory, horror-y, that's just weird. Whole families imply children and I just don't think that's appropriate in any context.

Maybe I'm not the target audience and I guess that's okay. I'm sorry to say I had to leave this one a negative review, I just can't get behind what was going on.

Thank you nonetheless to Creature Publishing, Lindsay Merbaum and NetGalley for providing me with an ARC. This review is entirely my own and honest opinion.

What did I just read?!? No idea but I read it in one day and loved it. Vampires so old they can’t remember how they met end up on a queer cruise where they meet a mysterious person who enchants them both. And then everything starts to go wrong. People disappear, someone gives a lecture, and the crew suddenly refuse to dock the ship. What is even happening here? Vampires at sea gave exactly what was advertised and left me wanting more. What happens next? I’m going to get everyone to read this so they can enjoy/suffer from the chaos and mystery with me.

2.75 out of 5 stars (rounded to 3)
This one was outside my usual reading lane, but the promise of a horror-comedy-spice mashup had me intrigued. Lindsay Merbaum’s writing style is captivating—I definitely found myself drawn in by the way she crafts her sentences and scenes. I’m actually curious to read more of her work because of that alone.

As for Vampires at Sea, the story felt a bit rushed. There were several moments where I had to flip back to earlier chapters just to make sure I hadn’t missed key details, which pointed to some plot holes or unclear transitions. The spice level? Off the charts. While I’m no stranger to a little heat in my books, in this case, it often felt like it overshadowed the plot rather than enhanced it.

A solid concept and great prose, but this one just didn’t quite hit the mark for me.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Funny, unique, and evocative, Vampires at Sea examines how was know ourselves in relation to others. A romp on a 'sex barge.'

I loved the way this author writes - I can’t quite put my finger on why I liked it so much. This book was creative and whimsical, summery and at times dark, and very, very horny. The main characters are fleshed out enough to feel real, and the POV of Rebekah is just fantastic. The “backdrop of war” was very thin, a few references but nothing that really changes the tide of the plot. I will definitely be looking for more by Lindsay Merbaum.

While there were aspects of this book that I found engaging, overall, it fell flat for me. The ending, in particular, felt rushed and ultimately unsatisfying. Several key plot points—such as the protagonist’s past lives, which are referenced repeatedly—are left unresolved. Similarly, important questions surrounding the war and the events aboard the ship remain unanswered. These lingering gaps in the narrative detract from the story's impact and leave much to be desired.

A dark and amusing, fast paced short story told by the voice of a narcissist vampire. If I had to pick my favourite part of this book, it would definitely have to be the narration. I found reading Rebekah's deliciously unhinged thoughts. I was looking forward to seeing what witty and horrible ways she would describe her environment and everything she experiences. I do live for the drama.

I ultimately enjoyed it, despite parts about it didn't necessarily fit my personal reading preferences. For example, on occasion I found myself frustrated by the writing style. Another thing, while I will never turn down a character based book, I would have certainly liked more plot, more World building and establishing how th magical creatures and magic work in this world. If for nothing else, I think I would have been greatly entertained by reading our main character describe it.

The ending felt a little bit unsatisfying. I think it would have benefited with a few more pages, to see Rebekah and Hugh together for a little bit longer, even if it ultimately ended the same way. It would have feel earned, and the conclusion more satisfying.

Overall, it is certainly an entertaining and easy read, if someone has time to kill and is looking for a dark and fun character based story, narrated by the most obnoxious yet amusing person you'll never meet.

I was super excited when I read what this book was about. A vampire couple going on a cruise? Sign me right up. It starts really interesting and I enjoyed how Rebekah saw the world around her.

I quickly fell in luster with her. Even though she was entirely self absorbed and definitely a jealous being, I kind of dig that. But I don’t know I didn’t feel like the story really went anywhere. Especially with the very abrupt ending.

Did I enjoy the story, yes! I love all things queer and campy and this fed me on both points. But there were parts of the story that just lost me altogether.

I appreciate the advance copy and I truly think the right audience will eat this up, it just wasn’t for me.

Thank you to Creature Publishing and the author Lindsay Merbaum for giving me access to this e-ARC in exchange for an honest review.

There are some aspects of this one that I really enjoyed - the atmoshpere was dark and interesting, given the weird mix of the characters and their thoughts alongside them being on a queer cruise. The characters were all insufferable, but I do enjoy an unreliable narrarator and didn't mind that aspect so much. We meander around a lot in this short story, but given the physical confinements it was primarily character driven. This was smutty and spooky and overall a generally fun short story.

I wish, however, that there was more of a horror aspect to it. There were so many areas where. given the horror description, I'd expected things to get far more disturbing and horror driven but I ended up coming out a bit disappointed. The main character towards the end was immensely annoying with her self involved "suffering", and I wish we'd seen her turn towards a more interesting path forward rather than the path we take.

It was definitely a fresh and interesting take on vampires, but left me a bit wanting overall.

This book was a vibe. A good vibe in my opinion. Who doesn't like queer vampires on a cruise? I did imagine this whole book in the style of by the sea from Tim Burton's Sweeney Todd.

This book was easy to read and gave some what we do in the shadows vibe. I did find the ending slightly diappointing? Maybe not tne correct word for it but I hoped for some more closure.

If you want a fun, slightly unhinged queer vampire read certainly give this a try.

Thank you to Netgalley for providing me with an arc in return for an honest review.

I received a free ARC of this in exchange for an honest review

I…don’t get it. The novella is well detailed about the setting, backstory and oh, so much sex, but the story is something to be desired. A vampire couple entranced by a Mary Sue? With an underlying threat or jealousy? And they’re an influencer? “Shrugs”, and they claim they are having fun, but seem to hate everything? What? Yeah. Not for me.

short, weird, and a fun read! the vibes were awesome throughout and the reinterpretation of magical creatures were cool. there were a few inconsistencies in the setting and some dangling plot threads that i felt, with how much they were brought up, should be vaguely resolved, but still 4 stars. tysm for the arc. i'd love a sequel or smth else in this world.

it was okay. i didn’t enjoy it as much as i expected. i thought it was interesting that the story focused on energy vampires instead of the usual blood-sucking kind. the humor reminded me a bit of what we do in the shadows, which was fun! all of the characters were so frustrating especially hugh.

"They're all watching me now as I do cartwheels onto someone's dick."

What a delightfully campy, queer, and horny book this was.

I honestly went in blind. The cover and title were enough to pique my interest so I was very pleased to receive an ARC to read and review. Soon after meeting our narrator - Rebekah, I knew I needed to buckle up. Not only is she a sexually liberated, fluid, narcissistic nightmare, but she's also hilarious, snarky, quick-witted and tough as nails. I LOVED her.

I was surprised by how much the humor worked for me. The descriptions of some of the sexual encounters were so perverse and ridiculous that I had to chuckle. Rebekah also breaks the fourth wall occasionally, letting us know she can't be bothered to recount certain people or events because they were so boring or unmemorable. It works to keep the story chugging along without bland exposition and gives us further insight into her character.

Other pluses:
The world-building is solid and hints at events happening off-page which are intriguing.
Surprisingly nuanced relationship dynamics and complicated emotional attachments.
Commentary on 'influencer' culture and the rise in vapid celebrity.
Representation for non-binary, queer, and gender non-confirming persons.

I'll be checking out future books by the author.

A story about two vampires, Rebekah and Hugh. Rebekah feeds on lust, Hugh feeds on misery, and together they’re a happy married couple. They decide to go on a cruise. Hugh becomes infatuated with a influencer named Heaven and Rebekah spirals, trying to understand why her husband would like this maybe-not-human person and why it feels like Heaven is everywhere. There’s a very funny narrator in Rebekah and I enjoyed her confidence in herself and unwillingness to change for a man.

I found this to be sort of hard to get into. It felt very teen angst. "No one's paying attention to me! Oh Gods I'm not the center of attention! I'm hot! Why can't anyone notice me?!?" I was waiting for the humor and horror as that was how it was billed, but I assume it is something that I just wasn't the intended audience?
I'm in my 40s so I understand I'm beyond a lot of the younger author's scope.
There was a good balance on the sex scenes between explicit and implied, though I'm sure there will be people who will be upset.
Again at the end it's with the teen angst. Is the "horror" that the main character gets killed? Oh please yes.
Oh well. That didn't work.
I just never was into the pretty, selfish ones.