”We’re on vacation!”
Are these really vampires?? Sex vampires? I’m still not sure after finishing this, and was definitely expecting more vamp!!!

I couldn’t connect to the characters at all. This book was just sex, narcissism, and then more sex and more narcissism…
The “horror” tag also felt unnecessary, nothing in this book felt more horror than thriller.
BUT, I did enjoy the way it was written. It felt a bit “What We Do In The Shadows”. The prose could be really interesting and beautiful at times, and was the reason I kept reading until the end.

Thank you Lindsay Merbaum and NetGalley for this ARC! 📚

This book was… fun & fine. It's for a very specific audience. If you are looking for a fun, sexy, quick story of a couple navigating polyamory, then you will like this book - if none of those things interest you then don't try it.

It's the perfect length - it’s funny at times, heartbreaking at other times and it is well written (though the language is very crass and explicit, again if that’s not for you then don’t read this).

It was enjoyable! Nothing particularly groundbreaking but in fairness it is a short book. I was intrigued the whole time even if it did feel a little predictable.

but It's just very specific to certain tastes, so if it's not for you, you will not like it. If you go into it expecting a quick sexy read, you will like it!!

⭐️⭐️.75

DNF at 48%

This was, unfortunately, decidedly not for me.

I could connect neither to the characters nor to the (barely existent) plot.

Even though I thought the characters and lore was intriguing throughout the first few pages, my interest rapidly deteriorated as time went on and we never learned anything new.

I also struggled a lot with the writing style. To me it just felt like it was trying to be something that it definitely wasn’t. A lot of the sections that were supposed to be funny just came off as cringy and it pulled me out of the story every time.

And additionally to all of that, literally nothing was happening! I felt like most scenes (including the smut) just told you in a few sentences what was going on and then moved on to the next thing without giving you the chance to even start to feel immersed in the story.

So yeah, sadly did not enjoy this. I expected a fun vampire novella to quickly read in between other books, but the fun was very much lacking for me.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC!

Wanted to love it but unfortunately didn't. Writing style just wasn't for me. Found it to be wince-worthy at times and just didn't have a good time overall.

Not sure how I feel about this— I like the idea of emotional/ energy vampires, and Hugo and Rebekah had an interesting relationship. But I can’t tell exactly what this is supposed to say. Is it a critique on influencer culture? Hookup culture? Is it just a bizarre story about vampires at sea? I don’t know. But I was admittedly a bit confused and then the book ended. Intriguing.

Rebekah and Hugh are vampires who have been together forever. On a Black Sea cruise that was meant to be a vacation, the couple meets an alluring socialite, Heaven. The boundaries of their open relationship strain when Heaven forms a special bond with Hugh. What is Heaven up to? Rebekah’s discontent grows, and she begins to suspect that there is more to Heaven than meets the eye. Rebekah and Hugh sustain themselves on emotions rather than blood; an important part of their feeding process is charming their way into sex with anyone who catches their eye. As such, the book depicts kink, orgies, and intercourse. Rebekah’s narration follows her winding thoughts; she is blunt about her sexual desires, which often lead her to have sex with her opponents. Will Rebekah and Hugh stay together?

It is a humorous carnal horror novella. I enjoyed the book due to its humor..

I flew through this little book! It was so funny and captivating it was hard to put down, with lore interspersed and some mystery around it, just stunning and hilarious throughout!

DNF at 50%
I was torn about this, I enjoyed some aspects of it such as the idea of a vamp couple getting on a queer cruise to enjoy a sex holiday lol
I liked the fresh vamp lore of different ways of feeding
I wish we got more content of the main couple together as we really didn't get much of them interacting.
The reason I am stopping reading this is because I find the fmc sooo egotistical. Not in a self-confident way, which I support, but in a cocky I am the most beautiful why is no-one paying attention to me annoying way. And I found the NB character they both fall for spoke in such annoying social media speech? Yet they were 30-40?? It was too much for me.
I was definitely intrigued by the plot but I have too much to read to spend more time on this story I am not fully captured by. I may come back to it

I was thinking of giving it two stars but in the end I didn't really enjoy anything about this book, so clearly this one wasn’t for me.

The premise was interesting and had so much potential, but everything ended up being extremely underdeveloped. How can you make a book with vampires on a cruise and to that add an orgy and make it the most boring thing possible? The author had all the elements to make this story interesting, but succeeded at it being boring.

Also, I didn’t care about the characters, they felt unidimensional and there wasn’t much about them for me to want to continue reading.

I only finished this book because it was short, but otherwise I would’ve dnf'd it.

gloriously weird & intriguing! giving it 3 stars because some scenes meandered on with no end in sight and no purpose

Vampires at Sea is a genre-defying, blood-soaked fever dream that crackles with dark energy and rebellious heart. From the moment the ship sets sail, you're pulled into a gothic odyssey that’s part horror, part queer myth, part feminist reckoning—and entirely unforgettable.

Lindsay Merbaum doesn’t just reimagine the vampire; she reclaims it. This isn’t your typical tale of creatures lurking in the night—it’s bold, sensual, and fiercely political. The worldbuilding is rich and strange, with a deep undercurrent of rage and liberation surging just beneath the surface. The ship becomes a kind of floating purgatory, full of danger, desire, and secrets—where every character feels like they’re on the edge of transformation or destruction.

What I loved most is how the book dares to be unapologetically weird. The prose is lush and experimental, the narrative fragmented in a way that mirrors the characters’ disorientation and hunger—for freedom, for power, for something beyond survival. It’s a book that doesn’t give you all the answers, but gives you plenty to chew on—figuratively and literally.

Vampires at Sea is a wild, gutsy ride that refuses to play by the rules. If you like your horror poetic, your stories full of teeth, and your metaphors soaked in salt and blood, this one’s for you.

1 stars

I got a headache reading this... it was painfully boring and not even the (cringey) innuendos, and the smut (or lack of it) could save this.
The ideas were there, but the execution was not it.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for the chance to read this book in exchange for an honest review.

I really enjoyed reading this book the reviews that said it had similar vibes to What We Do In The Shadows were correct- I could totally imagine the vampires in this book being a part of their world.
Although the characters weren’t always the most likeable, I was excited to find out what would happen and enjoyed the sun drenched atmosphere created by the writing style,
At times the story felt shallow but what more can you expect from vampires on a queer cruise?
I found Heaven SO annoying and I was so glad they got what was coming to them. Equally, I found Hugh to be a complete and utter wet blanket who really deserved a lot worse than he got.
A great summer read I’ve recommended to my friends.

Lindsay Merbaum’s Vampires at Sea is a deliciously unhinged, queer horror-comedy that sails the high seas of lust, ennui, and emotional vampirism. Set aboard a luxury Black Sea cruise, the novella follows Rebekah and Hugh, a centuries-old vampire couple whose open relationship is tested when a seductive, non-binary influencer named Heaven enters the picture. It's a smutty, stylish, and subversive novella that reads like Interview with the Vampire meets White Lotus—if both were rewritten by a queer goth poet with a wicked sense of humor. It’s a perfect read for fans of decadent horror, messy relationships, and literary kink.

What works:
Rebekah’s voice is the star of the show: biting, bored, and brutally honest. Her inner monologue is a cocktail of sarcasm, longing, and existential dread.
The book is wildly queer and unapologetically kinky, featuring orgies, emotional feeding, and a cruise full of hedonistic passengers. But beneath the smut lies a sharp critique of narcissism, relationship decay, and the hunger for meaning.
Merbaum’s prose is lush and literary, with a rhythm that mirrors Rebekah’s spiraling thoughts. The repeated mantra “We’re on vacation!” becomes both a punchline and a cry for help.
The novella’s satirical edge skewers influencer culture, polyamory clichés, and the commodification of desire, all while delivering a genuinely eerie sense of isolation.

What might not be for everyone:
The plot is loose and meandering, more focused on mood and character than narrative momentum.
Readers looking for traditional horror or romance may find the book too experimental or emotionally distant.
The novella leans heavily into camp and eroticism, which may not appeal to all tastes.

I thought I'd enjoy this one because if the synopsis, but didn't in the slightest.
I have to admit, queer spicy books are not for me. And the prose was all over the place, I even felt it pretentious and then started to say the word fu*k every other sentence.
The characters felt one dimensional and didn't create any intrigue for me.

I can say I've never read anything like this before. did I like it? mehhh idk. it was choppy. very choppy. I didn't like any of the characters. I do like the general idea of this book though, and I finished it, so that counts for something. I think the major problem for me was the flow.

Vampires at Sea by Lindsay Merbaum sets sail with the promise of camp, kink, and queer chaos—but ends up drifting in lukewarm water. It vaguely channels the sensuality of True Blood, but trades any real bite for shallow seductions and endless orgies. This satiric tale overflows with horny and shallow passages, but leaves behind a dry, non-existent vampiric lore.

Rebekah and Hugh have been companions for a few centuries when they decide to go on a queer Black Sea cruise. Hugh is a sophisticated and accomplished author—half a century ago—therefore, he should be imagined in black and white (wink). Rebekah is a short-tempered dominatrix. Their mission? To relax, join a few orgies, and feast upon their fellow passengers’ desires and sorrows. What initially promised to be an interesting interpretation of vampire lore—here, they feed upon desire—loses its appeal. The absence of blood and gore makes the mindless orgies and endless orgies talk (which happened more often than the deed itself) feel uneventful and tiring, with the erotica being more hinted at than delivered, and when it is delivered, it’s… fine—no trigger warnings here.

As the story progresses, they meet a non-binary influencer named Heaven, awakening Rebekah’s jealousy and Hugh’s obsession. Not much happens, other than some random comedic scenes that feel out of place in the narrative. I appreciate gender neutrality and good writing in this novella. However, the absence of gore, compelling plot, or fully realized characters weighed down my enjoyment. Unfortunately, Vampires at Sea was not for me, and it is hard to recommend it.

Rating: 2,0/5

Disclaimer: I received an Advance Reader Copy (ARC) of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions expressed are my own.

Thank you to Net Galley for this arc! I thought this book was interesting but ultimately, some things fell a little flat. The main one being the past lives that get mentioned multiple times but don’t go anywhere. Also, the war and the disappearances left me with a lot of questions. But the story, at face value, was captivating and made this a good, quick read.

An interesting story!! I had fun following Rebekah, though the ending did leave me a bit wanting. There’s a lot happening in a condensed format, but my attention was kept and I finished this in a flash - a fun way to spend some time :)

Thanks to NetGalley et al for the ARC!

In the acknowledgements, the author says this book proved she could be funny. Maybe I'm the wrong target audience. The premise seemed amusing, but it was a lot of 'I'm telling you this is sexy/funny/frustrating/risque' without it being sexy/funny/frustrating/risque. Heaven's 'mystery' was solved then revealed a chapter or so later but the reveal never made sense. What were they getting from Hugh/Hugo and what was Hugh/Hugo getting from them? It lacked the curiosity to make an interesting novella or a spark to separate it from fanfiction in the WWDitS universe.