"For all the hot queer sluts. You know who you are." Upon reading this dedication, I already knew I would love this book. Dry and morbid humor mixed in with an existential rampage of self reflection and acceptance!
Rebekah and Hugh board an artsy cruise ship thru the Black Sea. Emotional vampires, the couple feed and fuck on despair and desire. After meeting Heaven and being drawn to their presence, Rebekah has to confront her own reflection and Hugh's monsters view of her, leading her to liberation and adventure! This had me laughing and left me disturbed. I love a horror that truly speaks to the depth of human (and inhuman) emotion.

A pair of codependent emotional vampires- Rebekah feeds on sex, Hugh feeds on sadness- pursue a nonbinary influencer as a third on a gay cruise and everything goes to shit. (Or- Oops! All Narcissists!)

I read this novella on the train in one day and had a good time. It’s a bit of a mess but I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. Every character kind of sucks but it’s short enough and silly enough that this didn’t make me disengage like I sometimes do when there’s not anyone to root for.

I wish we’d gotten a bit more of Heaven, Hugh, and Rebekah’s pasts- Merbaum leans on characters not remembering their origins to keep all the details and world building a bit fuzzy- but again the length and tone made the fuzziness of the world alright for the duration.

I had a good time. I feel like I’ve seen the Hugh/Rebekah couple at artsy queer gatherings and Merbaum’s sense of humor is so biting and fun, but I think the squishiness of the world outside of the central story stops it from being anything more. An enjoyable way to spend a train ride.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an eARC in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

This book was unlike anything I’ve ever read before—super weird, completely indulgent, and I loved every minute of it.

Meet Rebekah and Hugh/Hugo: a pair of immortal emotional vampires, her with a hunger for lust and praise, him for despair and sorrow. Together for centuries, since before Rebekah can remember, they’ve stood by each other through everything. Hugo is a world-famous artist (which only adds to his allure), and when the two receive invitations to a queer Black Sea Cruise, they leap at the chance. As Rebekah reminds us constantly, “We’re on vacation!” What follows is unrestrained hedonism, every want and need pursued,until a glamorous nonbinary influencer named Heaven (possibly magical, definitely fabulous) enters the picture. Rebekah hates them on sight. Hugh, however, is enthralled.

What’s wild about this novella is that it shouldn’t work, but it does. The narration is locked into Rebekah’s self-centered POV, and she truly does not care about anything outside herself. There’s a war in the background, though we never find out who’s fighting. She doesn’t care. People vanish or get thrown overboard... whatever. She’s here to live her best undead life. This laser-focused narcissism is so unique and oddly refreshing for a vampire story.

The tone isn’t the constant, rollicking comedy the blurb might suggest. It’s sly, biting, and absurd, with a vein of smutty horror running through it. Honestly, it feels like a What We Do in the Shadows spinoff… but with even more sex. (And yet somehow unsexy sex.)

And I freaking loved the ending. Totally unexpected. The self-centered character decides to focus on herself for a while, and it still feels empowering in a "you go girl" kind of way.

This novella is bold, bizarre, and unapologetically itself. I applaud the author for pulling it off.

While I love the idea of the book it sadly wasnt my taste of writing style so I didnt got mysef to finish it!

This book is insane, in a fun way. Great character building, fun plot lines. I'm interested in seeing what else this author has out there.

I didn’t realize that the vampires could be too horny, but apparently, there is a line.
I had high hopes for this book. “A smutty horror-comedy” combined with a very interesting cover grabbed my attention. Unfortunately, nothing else about the book did. Smut, yes. A little too much. Horror? Barely. The vampires feed on emotions, not blood. The MC feeds off horniness and her husband feeds off sadness. There is a running background plot of people disappearing and being thrown off the cruise ship but the narrator does not care about anyone but herself so this is never investigated. Comedy? No. The writing is crass and most attempts at comedy were of the “I’m better than these human gay people with their rainbows and their enthusiasm for life”. It felt like punching down (at one point the MC refers to other characters as d*kes and it was clearly meant as an insult). The blurb did warn of unbridled narcissism and damn, it was in fact unbridled narcissism. I don’t know if I’ve ever hated a main character more and I genuinely couldn’t tell what Rebekah’s motivations were. She talks about her husband as if she’s tired of him and he’s barely good enough for her, but gods forbid he gets interested in something else. The ending was confusing and technically wrapped up the plot points, but quite terribly.
Thank you to Netgalley and Creature Publishing for the review copy, all opinions are my own.
As this review is not very postive I will only be sharing it on goodreads and storygraph, not my other social medias.

Special thanks to Creature Publishing and NetGalley for the ARC of this book.

I have to admit the cover and title pulled me in to an unenjoyable read for me. It's definitely not a horror and it takes place on a cruise ship for 2 weeks. Rebekah was a selfish unlikable character, as a matter of fact all the characters were pretty unlikable. And I'm not big on sexual books, but the sex parts were not at all sexy. The characters were toxic and I really wanted to like it, but I just could not get with this one at all. 2.8 rounded to a 3.

this was unfortunately not for me at all. the cover and concept pulled me in but the execution just fell completely flat.

all of the characters were not only unlikable but incredibly bland. Rebekah likes to think she's so hot and interesting but her inner monologue just had me roll my eyes constantly. also for a book with so much sex, it's the unsexiest thing i've ever read. dry and uninteresting, crass non descriptions of sex which could *almost* be interesting if Rebekah had any real arc at all.

the underlying homophobia in this supposedly queer book was also jarring at times? i'm not sure what to make of some of the things Rebekah says about the other people on the boat.

i expected sexy scary vampires but the horror elements were barely present at all. the ending felt rushed and unsatisfying to me.

— thank you NetGalley for providing a free ARC in exchange for an honest review.

A disturbing story of queer creatures, vampires if you will, that feed off human emotions - while on a vacation cruise in the Black Sea they meet another creature and are seduced into its thrall

Other reviews ask how is this horror, I ask how is this not - slightly gory but full of creeping dread whilst still a social commentary of who or what the truly bad guys are and the society we have created that feeds them

A strange and at times unsettling book. It's not quite clear what's happening in the outside world beyond the cruise ship - it seems the world is in a warped state of war encroaching at every moment and day to day mundanity continuing. Which of course is quite accurate to how societies do respond. The characters are all toxic as hell, pursuing their worst impulses carelessly and selfishly. Something of a character study of terrible people and how they indulge or break their own patterns

3.5 (rounded to 4)

The first thing you need to know about this book is that it's silly-goofy. You'll see other reviews criticising it's horniness and wanton disregard for anyone other than the MCs - but that's the *point*.

Rebekah, the FMC and first person viewpoint narrator, is entirely vain and self-obsessed, but that’s because she feeds off of the adoration and lust of others. The only person she cares about other than herself is her husband Hugh (although she does often do things she knows he wouldn’t enjoy); they have been together since before she can remember (the trouble with being an ancient vampire is of course that memories fade, or change) and she cannot picture life without him. She’s bored and takes them on a queer cruise, fucking just about everyone she comes across. Until Heaven. Heaven is a fabulous non-binary supernatural creature of some sort, and Rebekah hates them on sight. Hugh, however, is enthralled, so she has no choice but to let it play out.

None of the characters are likeable - but again, that’s the *point*. Rebekah is so self-absorbed that she notices people going missing or being murdered and simply moves on with her day. Hugh is incredibly boring. Heaven is a vapid influencer who speaks like they're addressing an audience. It’s told with such a light and silly tone that it’s an incredibly enjoyable read, as long as you go into it knowing that there are no morals to learn here, there is no deep message the author is trying to convey. It’s just a fun time.

The ending does leave a little to be desired, as I felt like it all moved a little too fast for me, and I would have liked to see a few more consequences play out. I’d happily read a sequel to this little novella, from a different POV or simply Rebekah roaming another continent and leaving mess in her wake. I support women’s wrongs.

This was sort of fun at first but was too campy to maintain my interest for long. I hung on because I was curious enough on where it was going. I wouldn’t really call this one horror. It was not spooky, not particularly gorey… just some confessions of some sexy supernaturals

This was an interesting novella. Each chapter was split into a day aboard a two week cruise so it made for a fast paced read. A queer horror comedy centred around Rebekah; a narcissistic yet emotional vampire, on a cruise with her beloved. Rebekah’s character really made this book for me. Her dry sarcasm had me in stitches. I enjoyed her journey of self discovery as she struggled to remember her life before Hugo and how things would change as he became more distant.
As much as I enjoyed it, I did struggle with the dialogue a bit. I would describe the writing style as blunt, it was very much straight to the point at times.

Perfect if you enjoy toxic relationships, dry humour, sex and vampires

Am I weird for thinking this is a cozy read? I genuinely looked forward to reading this every night, even if it was only 5 pages. Maybe this is a testament to how bad my reading slump has been recently. Somebody throw me an anchor!

Anyway, meet Rebekah, ancient vampire and seductress, who has decided to go on a voyage with her husband, Hugh. They are expecting a cruise of leisure and fun, until they meet Heaven. Heaven is mysterious, outgoing, and sexy, and, quite frankly, driving Rebekah mad. But Hugh, on the other hand, can’t get enough of Heaven. What can one lonely woman really do when her husband decides he’s had enough of her?

This is not a book for just any reader. Have you read this blurb?? It’s wild and terrifying but also silly and honest. I didn’t expect to like the story as much as I did, but here I am, recommending that you read Vampires at Sea. If you love What We Do In The Shadows and that type of dark humour, this book might just fill the vampire-shaped void in your heart.

thank you to netgalley for providing me with an e-ARC of this book in exchanfe for an honest review

i was very excited for this novella, but little did i know it would put me into a reading slump. it’s only a little over 100 pages long, but i just couldn’t make myself finish it.

the MC’s are insufferable. unlikeable characters that are written as if they were likeable.

“we went on that LGBTQ+ cruise out of boredom but of course the entire concept is sooooo cringe and soooo below us, because we’re cool and sexy and smart, unlike these lame bubbly gay people” is the core of MC’s narration.

the book could’ve explored sexuality and attaching your appearance and “body count” to self-worth amongst many other things, but did nothing except glorifying unhealthy self-importance and punching down on every page.

Vampires at Sea was a fun read for me as I enjoy vampire, and other supernatural creature, books. The internal monologue of the main character was both interesting and humorous as the story continued. It is a shorter book than I am used to so I would recommend it for anyone wanting a quick read for their day.

I started reading and already at the first 3 chapters i got bored with the writing. Had to skim the rest of the book. I liked the idea of vampires in a cruise where they can enjoy themselves, but it felt poorly developed. The characters feel pretty plain and with only one or two characteristics to their personality: Rebekah is beautiful and flirty; Hugh is mysterious and depressed; Heaven is talkative and bad. I could connect with any of the characters, but i liked Rebekah for holding her ground against Heaven and not forgiving Hugh.

In summary, I expected more. But I believe that with improvement on the writing (making the sentences connect more and be more like prose) and the character’s personality (giving then more depth and making them less horny) this book can achieve better things.

Thank you Netgalley and Creature Publishing for providing me with the eARC and I will keep my eye in the official publishing of the book.

A dark, decadent voyage through blood-soaked waters and feminist rage. Think Anne Rice meets Moby Dick, with fewer apologies.

I DNF'd this book at 30%. None of the characters were likeable to me. Very self absorbed and really not that interesting. I was excited for this book and was happy when I received this eArc but was really disappointed.

I've been sitting on this review for a couple weeks now, and I'm still not 100% sure what to say about the novella.

It's an interesting concept with immortal vampires that are going on vacation to "save" their marriage, and the troubles that they got into while there. I enjoyed the overall story and the descriptions, and how the chapters are broken down into each day on the cruise. However, there were parts that felt a bit clunky. On days with a lot of events, there sometimes wasn't a clear cut if there was a time gap; it felt like I misread or missed a section of the book when in fact that there was a time period jump.

I'm excited to see the adjustments the author will make on this book! For now it's a 3/5 read for me, but I will be keeping an eyes peeled for release date!