I would like to thank NetGalley and Amanda Manns for providing me with a free e-ARC of Vampires at Sea.

This short little book caught me off guard. I had expected it to be fun and silly, but I did not expect it would deal with so many emotions. The premise itself – queer vampires joining a cruise – seemed very fun. And for the most part Vampires at Sea was fun indeed.

The description, though, is quite misleading, as this book is definitely not a horror. It is a dark comedy with some (underwhelming) spice and the most boring orgy I have ever seen.

Our main characters, Rebekah and Hugh, are two shallow vampires who have been married for centuries. They decide to go on a cruise where they meet a non-binary creature called Heaven, who gets between them and causes chaos.

While I did appreciate Rebekah narrating the story, I do not think she is the most reliable narrator. I loved to see her talk about everything she was feeling – the good, the confusing and the bad. And I could not be happier about her choosing herself in the end. Her storytelling is, unfortunately, quite monotonous, and she does not seem extremely affected by what is going on between her and Hugh.

The other characters were a little stiff and underdeveloped. The same goes for the story; there were a few instances where I wished the author provided more background information. Dominantly – the war. It seems to have a big impact on the characters and the story itself, but it is only mentioned a couple of times and not in much detail.

I definitely think Vampires at Sea has a lot of potential; it is fun and entertaining, but it is too short.

though the book offers a mix of humor, romance, and a unique setting, i didn't really like it.
the concept is unconventional and the tone leans toward the playful, but dear god, i really didn’t find myself connecting with the writing or the characters. it didn’t quite work for me, though readers who enjoy offbeat, genre-blending stories might feel differently.

thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to Creature Publishing via NetGalley for the opportunity to read the ARC!

While this was a fun novella to read after a hectic finals season, I wish it was more committed to either the emotional vampirism and/or the escapades that could happen in a queer cruise setting. Personally, I wish the cat and mouse element was more fleshed out. Overall, still a fun read if you want an interesting take on the vampire power system.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC of this book!

I enjoyed this novella for the most part. I am a huge vampire nerd so I was very excited for this one. I loved the author’s writing style and there were some great lines, but I felt like it lacked a bit of depth. I never felt like I knew enough about the characters to properly connect with them, unfortunately. I did find the main three characters very interesting, especially Heaven, though I wish we got to know more about them all.

Rebekah and Hugh’s relationship was so interesting to me and I would have loved to see more of them as a couple/how their relationship worked before Heaven entered the picture. It was shocking to me how fast Rebekah just accepted Hugh wanting to end things after centuries together, it left me with a lot of questions about their relationship dynamic.

Rebekah is a fun narrator, the setting of a queer cruise was unique, there are some very memorable characters, but I wish there was more to sink my teeth into

I could see a future where I'd read this author again, but I did not truly enjoy this book. The MMC Hugh wins as the stalest, most boring MMC I have read all year. Rebekah wasn't much better. She only knows how to talk about sex and traveling forever, so there is no depth to her. The saving grace of the book was Heaven, the plot, and the writing style. Heaven was such an intriguing character, and they brought so many questions to this story. I also loved the plot of a cruise ship with a shapeshifter trying to steal souls, as well as the author's atmospheric writing style. However, those lead characters dragged this book down to abysmal levels.

I would give a brief summary of the book but I think it’s safe to say that because of the title it is pretty self explanatory.

The moment I read the title and the premise I was so excited to pick this up. The idea of queer vampires going on vacation on a queer cruise is such a fantastic concept and it’s not something that you read everyday.

This sadly fell a bit flat for me and I wish I couldn’t learnt more about the characters so that I could feel more captivated by them.

However, it was fast paced and queer so for that, I will always be here for it.

Thank you to NetGalley and Creature Publishing for providing me with this ARC. I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

2-Star Review: “Vampires at Sea” by Lindsay Merbaum

I’m honestly not sure what I just read, but I’m pretty certain it wasn’t horror. Vampires at Sea bills itself as a “smutty, super-queer horror-comedy,” but I found it more disorienting than entertaining—and certainly not scary. If anything, it felt like a chaotic urban fantasy with LGBTQIA+ representation set against the surreal backdrop of a Mediterranean cruise, with vampires who barely resemble the traditional mythos and who certainly didn’t leave any bite marks on me, metaphorically speaking.

Vampires at Sea ♦ Lindsay Merbaum - A Review

Opinion
The story follows Rebekah and Hugh, two “emotional vampires” from San Francisco on a pleasure cruise. Right away, I struggled to connect with either of them. Rebekah is one of the most narcissistic narrators I’ve encountered in a long time, and not in the fun, self-aware way. Her constant self-focus—every scene and interaction filtered through her ego—quickly grew tiresome. Hugh, on the other hand, is her polar opposite, to the point of being practically inert. He has the emotional engagement of a sleeping pill. I found their dynamic dull, not intriguing. Then there’s Heaven, a non-binary influencer who was supposed to be alluring and perhaps even magical, but came off as more of a sketch than a fully realized character. Like the rest, they lacked depth and believability.

The writing style is where things really unravel. It reads more like a stream-of-consciousness travel journal than a novel, and the narration jumps in time and topic without warning. The result is a feeling that you’re stuck at a dinner table listening to someone’s disjointed vacation recap—only this one includes a heavy dose of exhibitionist sex and identity crisis. Some passages were genuinely well-written, with clever turns of phrase or flashes of emotional insight, but they were few and far between.

As for the “vampirism,” it remained confusing throughout. Do these characters feed on blood? Emotions? Trauma? Desire? The book flirts with ideas but never commits. It left me with the impression that the concept of “emotional vampires” was more aesthetic than functional.

Conclusion
Ultimately, I found myself more frustrated than intrigued. The book had potential—a queer cruise, supernatural themes, a backdrop of war—but squandered it on surface-level drama and an unreliable, self-absorbed narrator. If you’re looking for horror, or even something emotionally resonant, this might not be it. I’m doubtful I’ll pick up another title by this author.

I picked this off NetGalley because the title and cover, I wasn’t certain what I was getting into but it was an enjoyable poolside read on vacation!

While parts of the book are a bit crass I did love the variation of vampires we were getting. I felt I got to get to know Rebekah pretty well for such a short book but other parts felt a little rushed. Side characters storylines were quick, I wanted to learn more about a few of them. Also, I felt the war storyline was a bit of a wash.

Overall funny and enjoyable!

⭐️⭐️⭐️✨ (3.5/5)
“Memory is a lie anyway. Half of what you remember is just what you imagine.”

Honestly, more than I expected given the premise! I went in thinking it’d be a guilty pleasure kind of book, but it was surprisingly literary and had a lot of substance to it.

Vampires at Sea is very “What We Do in the Shadows” coded. Imagine Colin Robinson and Laszlo had a baby, and then that baby married Nadja, and now they’re on a boat. Also, they’re emotional vampires now. I was kicking my feet when I read the acknowledgements and saw the author was indeed a fan of the show.

For a book that promised vampires on a cruise ship doing the deed, there were a lot of emotional depths explored. It felt like multiple current events worked their way into the background of the novel. Sometimes, these manifested themselves in ways that surprised me. There was definitely a vibe of “the world is burning down but I don’t see how that concerns me,” which felt timely. I found myself intrigued by the characters, especially our narrator, Rebekah. You couldn’t predict how she’d end a sentence. She kept me enthralled, and the prose was delectable. Bonus points for the story being unashamedly queer.

That being said, I felt like this novel was trying to “say something,” and I was not picking up what it was putting down. Maybe it’s my subpar literary analysis skills, or maybe there wasn’t some deeper meaning I was supposed to grasp. Regardless, this was a fun romp of a read. It wasn’t exactly what I expected, but it was quite entertaining. I will definitely look out for this author’s next book, which she mentioned she was wrestling with while writing this story. As someone whose writing project currently has them in a headlock, I felt seen. :)

Fans of this book should also check out Thirst by Marina Yuszczuk. It’s a tad bit more serious, but it’s another lady vampire tale told by an intriguing, somewhat unreliable narrator.

Netgalley proved me with a free e-arc in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts are my own.

Firstly a big thank you to Netgalley and Lindsay Merbaum for the opportunity to read this ARC.

Rebekah and Hugh are immortal emotional vampires who have been together for centuries. They each have their own tastes when it comes to feeding, so they can't deny the opportunity to join a queer friendly cruise where they can feast upon the desires and sorrows of the fellow passengers.

Their relationship hits an iceberg when they meet Heaven; a social media influencer who reels Hugh in. Rebekah is not as enchanted by Heaven and can't decide whether she wants to be seen by them or destroy them for threatening the relationship with Hugh.

Rebekah continues down a path of self-discovery and is left to ponder an unimaginable future. Perhaps there's no more room on the door for their relationship? (Sorry, had to throw in another Titanic reference)

Told from Rebekah's perspective, Vampires at Sea had me cackling from the get go, written as if it's her diary where she navigates the ocean of smut, desires, narcissism and betrayal.

My only real criticism of this was I wanted more!

This novel was not what I thought it was going to be and it definitely is for a specific type of audience.

Although it was only 168 pages I found it hard to follow and I felt like the characters didn’t have their own progress through the novel and they didn’t ground what was happening.

This novel has a lot of sex and orgys happening but that’s what the novel is mainly based on , a internal couple Hugh and Rebekah join an “orgy” cruise in hopes to find their next feeds and “fun time” partners.

Haven ends up rocking their world in a way they didn’t expect to happen.

I wanted to like it but, I gave it one star because this type of novel just wasn’t for me. As much as I tried to get into it and understand it,I just wasn’t the audience this novel was looking for.

Amazing. Beautiful. Haunting. This novel belongs right next to the Vampire Chronicles. Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC copy of this novel. I will be thinking about it until the end of time.

This is 100 percent for a specific audience. However I loved it. The characters were absolutely wretched in the best way possible.

This was an ARC read from @NetGalley that I’m so happy I managed to get!

Rebekah & Hugh are hot vampires, they adore each other, no one else can compare they are the loves of each others life 🥰

They also adore being active like rabbits with anyone and everyone! They decide to book themselves onto an “orgy cruise” for the best kinda vacation that suites all their needs…

Along comes Heaven. Who manages to make both of them become absolutely besotted with them. Rebekah faces jealously and the possibility of losing her Hugh for the first time, but what is Heaven & what is the end purpose for them 👀

Ah I enjoyed this! It was naughty, witty & a fun read! I loved Rebekah 😌 It’s defo one to check out if you like a bit of vampire naughty fun with a touch of obsession & envy👌🏻🤎

Vampires at sea should be released in October between 7th/16th. (GR says 7th but I’ve pre-ordered it which says 16th)

I rated it 3.5 🌟 #booktok #netgalley #horrortok #vampires #reading #book #bookshelf #spicy #read #extremehorror

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for letting me read this one early.

Okay sooooo … this was completely different from what I thought it would be. I guess you could label it peak weird girl fiction or somewhat poetic trash, idk it depends on the reader. For me it was something in the middle.
I see the appeal here but the execution was weak. It was hard to follow and in the end it just came down to sex.
I can’t say I hated this but I sure as hell didn’t really enjoy it. It still earns three stars because in a weird and fucked up way it fascinated me.

Vampires at Sea by Lindsay Merbaum had such a unique premise—a short gothic tale on the open seas, with vampires, no less! I expected atmosphere, intrigue, maybe even a touch of lyrical prose. But despite being only 168 pages, it took me five days to get through. It wasn’t dense in a rich or immersive way; it was dense in a way that made it hard to connect.

The writing style felt unnecessarily complicated, like the prose was trying too hard to sound elevated. At times, it read like a thesaurus had been fed into the manuscript. The metaphors were heavy and abstract, to the point where I often found myself confused about what was actually happening. There’s a difference between poetic and impenetrable—and this leaned toward the latter.

Unfortunately, the characters didn’t help ground the story either. They felt underdeveloped, and the pacing wobbled between rush and drag. I kept waiting for an emotional core or character growth, but it never quite came.

I received an ARC via NetGalley, and I do appreciate the opportunity to read it early. I know this might resonate with readers who enjoy experimental or metaphor-forward writing—but it just wasn’t the right match for me.

This is a very strange romp that’s going to appeal to a very specific niche and probably be despised by Everyone Else. I think that, if I’m correctly understanding and interpreting the soul of this thing, it succeeds at what it sets out to do. It’s simultaneously strikingly poetic and tackily purple. Maybe that’s fitting – a tacky account of a tacky cruise, Rebekah accurately or inaccurately recounting her experiences on the high Black Sea for those of us who couldn’t secure our own discount attendance coupons for the queer cruise to end all queer cruis(es/ing).

That doesn’t necessarily mean that it tells a perfectly cohesive story, or that everyone is perfectly likable, or that it’s a perfect 10/10; it does mean, however, that if you’re looking for a bit of an obfuscated poke-fun at rainbow capitalism and the commodification and flanderization of modern queerness set against a backdrop of two toxic immortals grappling with their attraction to a fictional individual who may or may not be an alternate-universe pastiche of a certain Queer Eye reboot entity, you’re in the right place.

Some folks have been put off by the nebulous and almost dismissive references to “the wars” and “plagues” and all of the other terrible things happening in this universe without any additional detail, but I think it actually works really well: it’s impossible to tell whether this is actually an alternate version of our current reality where everything has gone wrong, or if it’s a faithful account of our current reality through the lens of a being older than time for whom the last 400 years of wars have probably all bled into one big indistinguishable memory-chain of skirmishes and apocalypses anyway.

I think my number one gripe with this title, actually, has to do with its genre marketing more than anything else. It is neither horror nor smut, both of which it’s tagged and marketed as; the horror is really not so horrifying and the sex is perfunctory at best, even when described in vivid detail. In my opinion, it’s more of an absurdist dark fantasy than anything. If you try to read seriously and take everything at face value, it’s frankly pretty unpleasant. If you take a step back and read without trying to align yourself with any one character, narrator or otherwise, and just let her tell their story, the ship immediately rights itself.

Look, there’s only one way to know whether you’re the target audience here: pick it up (or double-click) and sample a few pages. The prose is ultraviolet, but the UV Cake is flowing. Meet me at the Black Laguna if you want to talk shop.

Many thanks to NetGalley, Creature Publishing, and author Lindsay Merbaum for the opportunity to read and honestly review this ARC.

Unfortunately, this wasn't for me. I'd say the cover really drew me in and I usually will read anything with vampires so it is probably my fault for requesting this one without doing much research into it. It felt more spice focused than plot focused which works for some but not for me. Being a novella, it was a quick paced read. Unfortunately, that can leave room for the story to be lacking in enough plot to keep me engaged. While I didn't personally love it, I can see a lot of people finding this a fun read.

I’m never opposed to a detestable protagonist, sadly in this one I wasn’t a fan of.
I will however give credit where it’s due. This book has an interesting and very unique premise as well as an unusual way of handling fantasy creatures such as vampires. Sadly I wasn’t a fan of the execution. I do feel a bit dissatisfied by the way sex is handled here. Didn’t feel to me as if it was actually necessary to the plot nor to flesh out characters, rather just a tool to drive a point home.
I also feel like the characters in this book lacked depth and growth, mainly Rebekah. I also feel like some plot points that were left opened (mainly Rebekah’s past as it’s mentioned many times) could’ve been explored a bit more. I do realise this is a short story but I wouldn’t mind if it had been a bit longer and I think it could’ve greatly benefited from that.
Either way I’m sure there will be readers who will still enjoy this book a lot and I’m excited to see what the author does next.

🧛🏼‍♀️ 🚢 Vampires at Sea🚢🧛🏼‍♀️

What do you get when you throw horny vampires into a all adult all-inclusive cruise? A giant horny and funny book! This leans more towards the LitFic & comedy side with a splash of horror, but definitely more of a smutty read than a horror thriller.

It was not what I expected per the descriptions, but still an enjoyable read. We start off with a narcissistic, capricious and pretentious MC that narrates how she's all that and a bag of chips, and soon she meets the actual bag of chips.

It was about 90% literary fiction & smut and 10% horror. I enjoyed the book towards the end and wish some of the other vampires/monsters would've played a bigger role, also the background story of the surrounding areas would've been cool addition to play a bigger roll.

As a horror read I did not care for it much, but as a literary fiction was a solid read.

Thank you NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this e-book ARC in exchange of an honest review.