I feel like this was a really important story to tell, covering really heavy topics, but maybe not executed in the best way. The ending felt a little flat, and didn't really give the closure I was hoping for.

(copy pasted it from my goodreads)
First of all thank you to Netgalley for allowing me to read my first Arc book.
This is a book that is not suited for everyone, make sure to check if you could read about heavy topics like these before reading. After finishing it, i first want to say how inspired i am by Brooke’s growth and how she managed find her own place in the world after struggling so much. Her story is somewhat relatable for any young girl who grows up believing they aren’t deserving of love or struggle a lot with codependency that result in toxic relationships like Brooke and Matt. At first everything was innocent, Brooke having a young crush even though he’s older, as any 14 year old girl has, but during their play he starts reciprocating these feelings and get into a secret relationship. This is also where a type of power dynamic because of their age and her codependency rises to the top. The harm and the pain this toxic relationship caused her, what was a possible factor in her depression and the actions she had taken after she became 18 and decided to leave England, gets talked about in more detail during her therapy session when she’s older and in her relationship with Charlie, who has helped her grow.

The writer did such a great job describing depression, mental health that it spoke to me on a deeper level. I connected with it so much that i disliked Matt and didn’t feel any enjoyment while reading his chapters, because the author did an excellent job at writing his character. The way he continued to blame her in his mind throughout all the four years, not once trying to take true accountability for his actions and realising the harm he has done, thinking she’s still in love with him, refusing to move forward with his life thinking she would return for him. It was until he finally saw Brooke and she spoke up for herself that he did take that accountability in some way. It was interesting to see it from the male perspective, but i did grow uninterested in his chapters when nearing the end of the book because i was more invested in Brooke’s growth and got often annoyed at his lack of accountability.

Something that spoke to me was her relationship with Charlie, it reminded me of my own first healthy relationship, or well a more healthy dynamic. The amount of growth she started to make and the therapy she started going to after was inspiring. It also is a reminder that despite our toxic past experiences, that it doesn’t mean there aren’t good men out there. Even though she had to learn about how her own toxic patterns.

I enjoyed the ending where she ended up living back home fully and ended up breaking up with Charlie to create her own life back in England. It symbolizes letting go of that codependency and creating your own life and home that you enjoy. I liked how she made sure to have multiple pillars in the end just like she learned in therapy.

I really enjoyed growing with Brooke, it was inspiring and i genuinely felt happy for her in the end.

Before starting this book, I hadn’t been sure what I was expecting of it. I love reading YA, coming of age and mental health representation just works really well in that setting.

But this book didn’t work for me at all. We start off with a very very toxic relationship. And while it gets repeated the entire book that it was a mistake, nobody actually really seems to care or feel sorry about it. You even feel like you need to root for them which is definitely not appropriate.

But once that relationship finally ends, the book loses all direction. After that it’s just a bad mix of vaguely worked out plot points that don’t take you anywhere. Neither of the characters actually grow up throughout the book or have any character development.

I just truly don’t understand what we’re meant to take away from this book. It’s so hopeless and excuses so many toxic behaviours and red flags. My 14 year old might’ve felt seen, but not in a good way at all. The adults in this aren’t exactly much better either. Which made a bad situation, so much worse.

While I had some hope that the ending would make things a bit better, it just did nothing and left me feeling like I had wasted my time. In short, not the book for me.

I don't even know where to start. Wow the emotional rollercoaster that this book took me on. This is a story I know I will remember for a very long time. So many themes revolved around this story such as: Age gap relationship, Statuary rape, Self harm, Suicide, Depression, Mental health.

The story focuses on the FMC starting at age 14 and the MMC starting at age 18 following them all the way until they are well into their 20s and all the struggles they navigate in life based off the many choices that were made from beginning to the end.

This was a YA, but so very thought provoking. I found myself often times reflecting on my own life choices as a teen till now while reading this story. The chapters were very short which made this a very easy read. The story was very captivating and with every page something new was taking place. I could not put this down. So glad I was given this ARC through NetGalley I cannot wait for everyone to read this!

This Is Me Trying focuses on Brooke, who as a teenager navigates a romance with an older boy when they are cast as the leading roles in their drama group's production of Romeo and Juliet.

Unfortunately this book just didn’t work for me. While the topics being discussed were important, I felt they weren’t handled particularly well, which made it difficult to stay engaged.

One of my biggest struggles was with the writing style. It didn’t flow smoothly and instead of drawing me in, it made the reading experience frustrating. The main characters didn’t help either—I found them irritating and their actions often left me irritated. There were moments when I seriously considered not finishing the book, simply because I wasn’t invested in them or their journey.

To make things worse, the advanced copy I received seemed to be an early, unpolished draft. The formatting was all over the place, with scenes merging into one another which made it difficult to follow. Even the character names changed in some sections, which completely threw me off and made it hard to stay focused on the story.

Overall, while I appreciate the themes the book aimed to explore, the execution just wasn’t there for me. With stronger editing, better character development, and a more refined writing style, it might have been a different experience. Unfortunately, as it stands, this one was a struggle to get through.

Thank you to NetGalley for the eArc of this book.

I think I am one of the few people who have had no intense reaction to this book. Full of trigger warnings on statutory rape, codependency, mental health, etc., it does pose many important questions for teens as they navigate these difficult and potentially disastrous situations themselves.

I didn’t expect this story to take place over a decade but it does add to the story of how trauma and mental health can affect us later on.

Thank you NetGalley, Jenna Adams and Unbound for the ARC. All opinions stated here are my own.

Thank you to the publisher for the earc!

I'm going to be completely honest here, the main reason why I read the book was the title. But I admit, based on the synopsis I expected a very different book. The reunion when they are adults? Happens in the last 6% of the book. They meet once accidentally, then have 1 talk about what happened 6 years ago and that's all.

I can't deny that this is an important topic, it needs to be spoken about, but something wasn't right here. I'm leaning towards that it was the writing style which made it odd. It felt a bit juvenile which in itself wouldn't be a problem as Brooke is only 14 at the beginning, but I think the style should have matured with her.

The story itself was okay, though I did not agree with many of Brooke's choices. And her therapist said she had signs of depression before, like where? After their first break up, it was clear, but before that it did not read like she was depressed.

I did not like any of the characters. All of them were selfish and immature, even when they got older and should be wiser.

And the ending was disappointing for me. After 400 pages of suffering and moping, I was expecting something bigger.

This is Me Trying by Jenna Adams
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
🚫

Well this was a gut wrenching roller coaster of emotions that I was not prepared for. Thank you @netgalley for the multiple gut punches and 3am crying fest. It was cathartic. I picked this book because I'm a Swiftie and the title called to me. I stayed with it because it was so well written and I needed to know what happened to the characters, especially Brooke.

What I liked:
Brooke and Matt were flawed, relatable characters who screwed up, tried to hide from their mistakes, and then tried to confront or fix them. I loved the way we see them at several ages as they grow and realize how they messed up in the past and what they would have done differently if they had the chance. The dual POV was essential to really diving into this story.

What I didn't like:
Parts of the story felt like they dragged. Nothing terrible or long lasting, but a few unnecessary scenes that felt overdone. And if you read the book; the way things were left with Charlie at the end. I really didn't like that. I get why, but I hated it.

4/5✨ First of all, thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC of “This is me trying”. This book talks about a lot of important topics regarding mental health, consent, statutory rape, self harm and many other topics which sadly a lot of us relate to and for that reason is very important to talk about them. Whether I think this book is very important and necessary, and i liked it for the most part, I struggled a lot up until the 40% mark, it made me feel very uncomfortable. I’m aware this is a me problem but it’s not that it triggered me or anything, but reading the POV of an 18 year old and knowing about how he feels and the thoughts he has about a 14 year old was very difficult for me. Definitely highly recommend reading the trigger warning before deciding if you want to read this book. Nonetheless, i think the author was well informed and made a story that maybe can help a lot of people, specially a younger audience.

This book was an absolute roller coaster... I never knew what the MC's were going to do or decide. With that being said I think that book will be vital in starting valuable conversations with young adults and adults. This book does not shy away from heavy topics such as suicide, abusive relationships, as well as depression. The way these things are shown in the book are done in a way that I feel many readers may understand or relate to. The ending was also satisfying, given the books content. Wonderfully written and a highly recommended read.

ok, im not sure where to begin. Firstly, I'll address the elephant in the room, I definitely dont feel like this book should be marketed as teens/young adult. I feel the themes are quite dark and even though the FMC is 14 years old, the issues within the read are better suited to older teens, or at least advanced emotional maturity.

Theres a lot going on, and I love how the author touches on serious topics of mental health, self love, consent and toxic relationships. I just felt that the delivery wasnt quite there for me. Its a decent sized book, but I had moments where I felt like parts were missing, they start at 14 and 18 years of age and that made me quite mad, a bit grossed out... maybe that was the intention..

Theres a huge graphic scene of self harm which is quite confronting.

Even though it wasnt a perfect read for me, Its a very thought provoking with very contentious/confronting topics. Thanks so much for the opportunity to review this arc.

It's such a beautifully written book!
The book follows Brooke, a teenage girl who's romantically involved with the Senior, Matt.
I find the author masterfully tackle a sensitive issue around mental health, romance, co-dependency and blurred lines when it comes to sexual consent. While this book does categorized itself as contemporary YA, I find it is leaning towards the mature side due to the topics it's explores on consent and trauma. It definitely resonates with adult readers as well.

I really enjoy Jenna Adams' writing style, she does have her way of masterfully crafting prose that feels both poetic and piercing, describing trauma and healing and self acceptance in such raw honesty. This book will resonate with a reader who are on an intersection of heartbreak and healing.

An interesting YA that touches on areas of difficulty - suicide, teenage romance, discovering ones self.
I loved the characters and was crying, laughing and feeling all the emotions along with them.

TW: suicide, depression, pedophilia, abusive/toxic relationships

I have read a lot of bad books in my day, but this one takes the cake as the absolute worst book.

To start, the writing is absolutely horrific. My review thus far has more description than the book itself. The characters had no personalities, no characteristics, no aspirations, NOTHING. Because of this, they were unable to develop as characters because there was nothing to develop. This did not stop the author from trying, although it obviously did not work. This was not helped by the pacing either, as most scenes between the main characters were reduced to summaries rather than actual scenes with actions and conversations. The pacing also affected the plot, which was mostly non-existent, and made it difficult to understand where the story was going and what the author's intentions with this book were.

This next part will contain spoilers.

The main characters are fourteen and eighteen respectively. The synopsis says he is seventeen to appear less-perverted, but the mmc turns eighteen almost immediately in the novel. Either way, the age of consent in England—where the book takes place—is sixteen. This does not stop the main characters from entering into a very toxic relationship or from having sex (also known as statutory rape). The fmc's maturity is frequently referenced, even though she is the most immature character ever. I do extend some grace to her, seeing as she is a literal child. Whenever the main characters break up—a frequent occurrence—the mmc refers to her as young, naive, and bratty.

There are also time skips of three years throughout the book. These are poorly written, of course, and lead to issues with both the pacing and plot. It was impossible to tell where the book was headed, and I fully believe that is because the author herself had no clue what to do with her predatory plot and bland characters.

The fmc does have depression, and in my unprofessional opinion, it is handled very poorly. I was uncomfortable reading any infrequent mention of her mental health because it felt rude and harmful to those who actually suffer from depression. There is also a scene with self-harm and a possible suicide attempt. It is unclear whether the fmc actually wanted to kill herself or not. Either way, she goes to the hospital, where a doctor tells her she is selfish. This quasi-suicide attempt is thankfully vague, but that is likely more due to the author's inability to write rather than out of respect for anyone's mental health.

It was a struggle to read this book because of all of the issues mentioned above and multiple other issues I am too tired to talk about. The only reason this book gets two stars is because the fmc and the mmc do not end the book together. I was very afraid they would for the longest time. Throughout the book, I found myself asking whether the author intended to write a romantic relationship between two people separated by age and an unforgiving society, or if she intended to warn minors of inappropriate relationships with creepy men. Even at the end of the book, the question still lingers.

This book never should have been published. Jenna Adams should be ashamed for tiptoeing around the predatory dynamics played out between the main characters in this book. Both characters are incredibly young, but it doesn't make it less predatory for an 18 yo to pursue a relationship with a 14 yo girl, though young, he's, by nature, more mature and therefore able to manipulate someone her age. The author should also never write another book again. Anyone that found this book to be well-written or romantic or any positive adjective should never be allowed to read again or allowed near a playground. I am disgusted with Neem Tree Press for acquiring and publishing this book. I am absolutely disgusted with everyone involved in this book. I hope you have the life you deserve.

Absolutely no thanks to the publisher for the e-copy. This was the worst experience of my life. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

sadly I couldn’t continue to read this book. The author did such a good job accurately depicting the main characters Brooke’s depression that it got to me - if you struggle with depression please approach carefully.

2,5⭐️
Thanks to NetGalley for an eARC of this book.

This book was written well, and the characters were ok, but I don’t think this book was for me. This book should be targeted to older teen readers or even adults. This book was very heavy and dark- not a romance which the description suggests, but an exploration of trauma. I do enjoy how we saw Brooke grow and process her trauma, especially while also see Matt’s side of the story (even if his side didn’t really feel necessary by the end). I wish Brooke hadn’t just abandoned Charlie near the end though. Overall, not a book for me, but I can definitely see some people really enjoying it.

(Also I’m confused why the author is republishing, since the same book came out in 2022 titled “Can I Stray”, or why the eARCS are even necessary then)

🤍𝓣𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓲𝓼 𝓜𝓮 𝓣𝓻𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰🤍

Stars: 3.5⭐️

genre: young adult/ coming of age

Publication Date: July 17 2025


Blurb: Brooke and Matt are casted as Romeo and Juliet. Brooke is only 14 and Matt is 17. They didn’t mean to fall in love but, they did. Brooke keeps secrets to maintain the relationship and Matt makes a choice that is illegal. Brooke makes a quick decision that changes her life forever. When they reunite years later can all be forgiven?

Opinion: This novel is told in 3 different acts and navigates through Brooke’s very traumatic past dealing with sexual consent and mental health. Jenna shattered my heart and had me shedding tears while reading this book, I was right along in the journey as Brooke learns to navigate everything she has ever known and learn to start over. This novel isn’t your typical love story, it’s one where Brooke learns to love herself and know that it’s okay not to be ok. I absolutely love that Jenna started writing this novel at the age of 14, you can see the way the novel sort of grew up as well as Jenna did and more knowledge behind asking for help when needed became available to her.

Read if you like:

🌸mental health awareness
🌸coming of age
🌸 loving yourself


**thank you to NetGalley and Unbound for allowing me to read this ARC**

5⭐️

This Is Me Trying completely took over my life—I couldn’t put it down. From the very first page, I was hooked, but I also wasn’t prepared for how heavy it would be. If you're thinking about reading it, definitely check the content warnings first. This book doesn’t shy away from the tough stuff, and it hits hard.

The story follows Brooke and Matt over nearly a decade, showing how one decision can create ripple effects that last a lifetime. At fourteen, Brooke falls into a relationship with Matt, who’s eighteen. At first, it feels like an all-consuming romance, but as Brooke grows up, she realizes that what happened between them wasn’t love—it was something far more complicated, something that, in the eyes of the law, was a crime. That realization completely shatters her, and from there, we witness her years of unraveling, self-destruction, and—finally—healing.

Told in three acts, this book doesn’t sugarcoat the messy, nonlinear path to self-acceptance. It explores consent, mental illness, and the weight of choices made too young. The characters are flawed, sometimes frustrating, but so painfully real. I found myself understanding them even when I didn’t agree with them. Matt never set out to hurt Brooke—he truly loved her—but love doesn’t erase harm. And Brooke is left to pick up the pieces of a life shaped by something she didn’t fully understand at the time.

The therapy scenes hit me the hardest. They felt raw, real, and deeply personal, especially in how they explored codependency and self-worth. As someone who has struggled with codependency, Brooke’s journey forced me to reflect on my own experiences in a way I didn’t expect.

Even though this book is categorized as YA, it feels more like an adult novel, especially in the later sections. It tackles trauma, consent, and mental health in a way that’s brutally honest and, at times, deeply uncomfortable—there’s a graphic self-harm scene that some readers might find triggering. But that discomfort is necessary because these are conversations we need to be having.

This is, hands down, the most real book I’ve ever read. It doesn’t hold back. It doesn’t wrap things up in a neat little bow. Instead, it gives an unfiltered look at how trauma lingers, how healing is never a straight line, and how self-forgiveness can be the hardest thing of all.

I loved this book with my whole heart, and I haven’t stopped recommending it to everyone I know.

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️.5 (Rounded up)
# Pages: 432
Publication Date: 07.17.25

“My worst fear had been realised: they can find you. This safe little space you’ve made for yourself is in danger. Your separate worlds can bleed together. All that hurt, pain, and sadness from your past can wash in through the cracks in the walls you’ve built and get to you.”

* YA Contemporary Romance
* Coming Of Age
* Mental Health Rep
* Self Discovery
* Healing
* Explores Heavy Teen Topics

**Please check the ⚠️Trigger/ Content Warnings⚠️

Synopsis:
In this contemporary coming-of-age YA novel, a teenage girl navigates a romance with an older boy when they're cast as the leading roles in their drama group's production of Romeo and Juliet.
When Brooke and Matt are cast as romantic leads in their drama group's performance of Romeo and Juliet, they don’t mean to actually fall in love. Secrets and lies seem a small price for Brooke to pay for an older boyfriend, until they take their relationship to the next level one night in an empty auditorium. After she learns of the illegality of Matt’s actions, Brooke’s anxiety reaches breaking point and she makes a decision that changes her life forever. Years later, Matt is reunited with Brooke, desperately seeking redemption. But what sense can they make now of a love that never did run smoothly?
Exploring mental health, co-dependency, and the blurred lines of sexual consent, this captivating debut recounts a young woman’s journey to independence as she strays beyond all she has ever known to confront her traumatic past. (Previously published as Can I Stray)

“This Is Me Trying” by Jenna Adams was a harder read to get into due to the beginning kind of feeling like it jumped around. She covers some pretty heavy topics. However, they’re topics that teens DO need to explore and discuss. Taboo subjects that some are afraid to discuss. This book does allow a safe space to learn and reflect. I feel like it was delivered in a way that teens can understand and relate. With that said, I did enjoy that aspect.

I think there’s some definitely so much potential with these concepts and it fell a little flat for me. Kind of felt like a couple drafts in and need a little more fine tuning to the story. But I did love that she broke it down by three different acts and alternated between the Brooke and Matt. I also love that she did show Brooke working through her codependency and toxic relationships in therapy. I’m a huge therapy advocate and feel like it should be more normalized.

Overall, I think that Jenna has so much potential and is a very talented author. Her creativity and fearless with facing complex topics is highly admirable! I think that this is a great read for teens that really are struggling and seeing that even with toxicity in teen relationships, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Finding your inner voice and self empowerment is achievable!

Thank you netgalley and Unbound for this ARC copy.

I very rarely have such a visceral reaction to books I read, but this was one of those rare occasions. What a gorgeous, vivid book. A total triumph. Thank you so much to NetGalley and the publishers for allowing me to read - and review - it.

'This Is Me Trying' - aptly named in line with a brilliant song with similar themes - is, as described by the author, a story about a girl who, after years of mental illness and mistreatment, learns how to fall in love with herself. It's a YA coming-of-age, but one which transcends into adulthood; it's a story of consent, and battling depression, and finding yourself. It's unsatisfying and uncomfortable, with discussion questions at the end that genuinely had me stumped.

Another review called the plot dry... but to me, it felt less like a fairytale and more like a raw, honest depiction of real life.

Split into three "acts", the book follows Brooke and Matt, alternating between their perspectives, as we meet them in school; Brooke is fourteen, Matt is almost eighteen, but the pair strike up an unlikely romantic relationship when they're cast against each other in a small-town production of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. Brooke's world is turned upside down when she learns that the night they spent together was illegal... that, in the eyes of the law, she was r-ped by Matt, the boy she loves more than anything, the boy she would die for.

Three years later, we find Brooke at sixth form, Matt navigating life as a Master's student. The pair rekindle their relationship after Brooke's year thirteen prom, the promise of a future together on the horizon, but Brooke has other plans... shifting her world upside down for a second time as she ups and leaves.

Another three years pass, and our final part brings healing, and closure. Adult life is unsatisfactory, filled with unfulfilled promises and reflection, but Brooke is finally ready to look back at the past and face up to her sins... and those who sinned against her. I was deeply unsettled by her final choices, but maybe because she doesn't get that fairytale ending I was so hoping for - yet maybe, once the final page ends and her life continues, she will.

The book posed lots of important questions, and probably a lot of questions more teens should be asked, and forced to understand. When I was fourteen, I would have had no idea that it was illegal for me to sleep with an eighteen-year-old. When I was fourteen, I couldn't have possibly understood how much of a power imbalance would have been present in a relationship with a legal adult... and I don't think anyone ever told me.

There are lots of trigger warnings for this book, rightly so - but I think this is a book every teenage girl, and boy, should read. Consent is a sticky subject, and so are the legalities surrounding it, because everyone matures at a different age. But I think what the book displays best is how important it is for adults to check up on the young people in their lives, and for friends and family to never give up on those they love. So much of the story could've been solved with effective communication.

To me, the book felt like a more realistic, and therefore successful, version of Sally Rooney's 'Normal People'. Long and painful and beautifully told, set across the world, following the lives of all sorts of colourful characters.

I absolutely adored it, and I cannot recommend it enough.