The Impossible Truths of Love

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Pub Date 5 Oct 2021 | Archive Date 19 Oct 2021
Amazon Publishing UK | Lake Union Publishing

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Description

From bestselling author Hannah Beckerman comes a moving story about memory, secrets, and what it really means to feel that you’re one of the family.

“WONDERFUL. I read [it] in one gulp.” —Marian Keyes

“I LOVED this book and will be recommending it to everyone.” —Ruth Jones

“Hannah Beckerman is the real deal.” —Alex Michaelides

When Nell’s father makes a deathbed declaration that hints at a long-held secret, it reignites feelings of isolation that have plagued her for years. Her suspicions about the family’s past only deepen when her mother, Annie, who is losing her memories to dementia, starts making cryptic comments of her own.

Thirty-five years earlier, Annie’s life was upended by a series of traumas—one shock after another that she buried deep in her heart. The decisions she made at the time were motivated by love, but she knew even then that nobody could ever understand—let alone forgive—what she did.

As the two women’s stories unravel, a generation apart, Nell finally discovers the devastating truth about her mother’s past, and her own.

In this beautifully observed and emotionally powerful story of identity, memory and the nature of family, Hannah Beckerman asks: To what lengths would you go to protect the ones you love?

From bestselling author Hannah Beckerman comes a moving story about memory, secrets, and what it really means to feel that you’re one of the family.

“WONDERFUL. I read [it] in one gulp.” —Marian...


A Note From the Publisher

Hannah Beckerman is an author, journalist and broadcaster. She is a book critic and features writer for a range of publications including the Observer, the Guardian and the FT Weekend Magazine. A regular chair at festivals and events across the UK, she has interviewed a host of authors and celebrities, as well as appearing as a book pundit on BBC Radio 2 and Times Radio. Prior to becoming a full-time writer, Hannah worked in television as a producer and commissioning editor. The Impossible Truths of Love is her third novel.

Hannah Beckerman is an author, journalist and broadcaster. She is a book critic and features writer for a range of publications including the Observer, the Guardian and the FT Weekend Magazine. A...


Advance Praise

“WONDERFUL. I read The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman in one gulp. The intrigue at this book’s heart genuinely ‘got’ me.” —Marian Keyes, author of Grown Ups

“Hannah Beckerman’s writing is utterly superb: so finely crafted. I was gripped from the start and couldn’t put it down. I LOVED this book and will be recommending it to everyone.” —Ruth Jones, author of Never Greener and writer / star of Gavin and Stacey

“This is an accomplished, moving, and deeply felt novel. I found myself thinking of it during the days and savouring it as I read it. It’s affecting, elegiac, and highly relatable. Hannah Beckerman is the real deal.” —Alex Michaelides, author of The Silent Patient

“A page turner of a story, deeply felt, finely woven, and sharp as a tack about the unspoken conflict and isolation within families, as well as the lengths people can be driven by both love and loss. It made me think too about the nature of memory; about what exactly we own and what we assume or even imagine. It’s an unflinching book and all the better for it.” —Rachel Joyce, author of The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry

“So beautifully written, involving, and utterly heartbreaking.” —Rosamund Lupton, author of Three Hours

“Masterfully written and hugely powerful.” —Adam Kay, author of This is Going to Hurt

“This is a beautiful and heartbreaking novel about loss, family, and grief.” —Kate Mosse, founder of the Women’s Prize for Fiction and author of The City of Tears

“Skillfully entwining the private lives of mother Annie and daughter Nell, The Impossible Truths of Love is not only a story of love, but also of duty, character, identity. You will turn the pages of this rich and moving novel with a full heart.” —Louise Candlish, author of The Heights

“Powerful, beautiful, and exquisitely written.” —Joanna Cannon, author of The Trouble with Goats and Sheep

“A bold and moving story of tangled family lives, the awful things that parents do to compensate for grief, and the way, despite all efforts, the truth comes out. Poignant, dark, and horrifyingly plausible.” —Amanda Craig, author of The Golden Rule

“A heartfelt story of secrets, past trauma, sorrow, and love, The Impossible Truths of Love explores the true meaning of tangled family ties—impossibly tender.” —Lucy Atkins, author of Magpie Lane

“Utterly beautiful, desperately moving. This book is a finely crafted emotional powerhouse that will keep you up all night, desperate to discover what happens.” —Kate Hamer, author of Crushed

“A gripping mystery about one ordinary family and a devastating secret. This story is compassionate, beautifully written, and had me hooked from the start.” —Louise Hare, author of This Lovely City

“This is such a beautiful book. Moving, poignant, and compassionate, it forces the reader to consider how far they would go to protect the ones they love.” —Louise O’Neill, author of After the Silence

“Beautifully written, emotionally charged story of family and secrets that had me hooked to the end.” —Dreda Say Mitchell, author of Say Her Name

“A fast-paced family story…I couldn’t put it down.” —Cathy Rentzenbrink, author of The Last Act of Love and Everyone Is Still Alive

“WONDERFUL. I read The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman in one gulp. The intrigue at this book’s heart genuinely ‘got’ me.” —Marian Keyes, author of Grown Ups

“Hannah Beckerman’s writing...


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ISBN 9781542029520
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Featured Reviews

An emotional journey of loss, heartbreak and discovering long hidden truths from the past. Told in a split timeline this book is both nostalgic and reflective. When you have felt that you never belonged there is usually a reason. An amazing read.

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Happy Publishing Day! What a beautiful, touching, sad, truly realistic story of daughters, parents, sisterhood, missing changes, broken hearts and broken lives!

Nell is the main character of the story, a struggling woman with successful academic career. It was so easy to relate with her: especially her characteristic traits: how she’s raised by elder parents and how hard to become a little child of the family when she grows up along with her big sisters: feeling left behind, excluded, forcing herself to act more mature and grow faster than her own age ( I personally struggled with those predicaments and complex feelings, too.)

Her father is the only one supported her for the choices she’s made. She studied Psychological Sciences at Oxford University and after seventeen years later she became remarkable associate professor in stem cell therapies. Her choice to leave away from her family is always criticized by her own sisters who like to make snarky comments about anything she achieves, bottling up their resentments, feeling jealous of her freedom.

Now the only person she can truly communicate, her dear father Bill is in palliative care, about to die in a few days. Before her father dies, he tells her something unexpected. A secret: that makes no sense. But did her father mean? Could she learn the truth from her mother Annie who is suffering dementia. Could she be a reliable narrator of their life story?

But Nell already gets intrigued. She has to know the truth. As she digs deeper to find out the family secrets, we move backwards in 35 years to learn more about Bill and Annie’s story. Something so tragic happens to Annie which affects everything in her life, damages their marriage and unfortunately this is not the only tragedy the couple has to endure!

This is sad, powerful, strikingly emotional story. The words directly come out from depths of author’s heart. They’re genuine, unique, resonating, pure, real! Definitely a touching family drama you shouldn’t miss out!

Special thanks to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing UK for sharing this digital reviewer copy with me in exchange my honest opinions.

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A really thought provoking, emotional and poignant piece of writing. Tackles taboo subjects sensitively and beautifully with care and love. Just beautiful.

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The Imposed Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman

An intense read of family secrets untold. love and heartache mainly through the eyes of Nell.
Nell had always had the sense of something missing from her family , a terrible secret that has never been spoken about . On visiting her dying father he speaks about something that sends Nell off on a quest to find out the story.
I enjoyed the story which was poignant and heartbreaking at times , and it truly showed that some families are not always as they seem.

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The Impossible Truths of Love explores family secrets, love, grief, and the coming to terms of them. Before Nell was born her parents suffered a dreadful tragedy that she has never known about but which affected her mother immensely. When Nell visits her father on his deathbed he makes a surprising remark that sends her off to explore the meaning of. Her mother is now suffering from dementia and her memory has failed while her two older sisters appear resentful of the fact that Nell was the favoured child and cannot throw any light on her dilemma.

Once again, a beautifully written story from Hannah Beckerman. Many thanks to NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing for the opportunity to read and review this book.

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Many thanks to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing for a free Advanced Review Copy of this book. I haven’t read this author before, but after this stunning read, I’ll be sure to check out her other stuff.

This is one of those reviews where I can’t say too much without putting in spoilers. Suffice it to say, this is a WOW read that I would have read in one sitting if life had allowed. As it was, I finished this amazing novel in two stints.

The narrative is split between “then” and “now” and follows the main character, Nell, and her mother, Annie.

Nell’s father is dying of cancer, which has taken him down at speed. Meanwhile Annie has developed Dementia. Nell’s world has turned upside down already, and then her father says something on his deathbed that changes everything she thought she knew about her life. The rest of the story unfolds from there, and the truth is revealed in stages via each trip back in time.

Here are some lines that stood out for me …

“Her breath smells tired, musty, like air that has been trapped in a room for too long.”

And …

“… the urgency creeping around the corners of her consonants.”

And …

“… bland euphemisms filling the space where her worst fears lie.”

And …

“The rest of Bill’s question hangs in the air, unsure whether it wants to settle or fly away.”

I could go on. The imagery, description, and emotion in this is superbly done. The Impossible Truths of Love gets a resounding five stars from me. Go and read this book!

***

NOTE ON RATINGS: I consider a 3-star rating a positive review. Picky about which books I give 5 stars to, I reserve this highest rating for the stories I find stunning and which moved me.

5 STARS: IT WAS AMAZING! I COULD NOT PUT IT DOWN! — Highly Recommended.
4 STARS: I WOULD PULL AN ALL-NIGHTER — Go read this book.
3 STARS: IT WAS GOOD! — An okay read. Didn’t love it. Didn’t hate it.
2 STARS: I MAY HAVE LIKED A FEW THINGS —Lacking in some areas: writing, characterisation, and/or problematic plot lines.
1 STAR: NOT MY CUP OF TEA —Lots of issues with this book.

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3.5 stars. This is a novel of family love and to what lengths members of a family will go to keep that love strong and intact. Nell, a young woman who is dealing with her mother’s increasing dementia, hears her father on his deathbed tell her "You need to know that I've always loved you even though you were never really mine to love.” As she works with her sisters in clearing their parents’ house after her father’s death and her mother’s move to a care facility, she begins to unravel what secrets have lain hidden in her family’s past — and why they did.

This is a heartwarming story that I enjoyed. My only quibble is that some of the introspective scenes (and this novel is really a series of many introspective scenes) are far too long. All in all, though, this was a good read, and I look forward to reading more from this author.

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A book of identity, family, and love. Gripping and compelling, it manages to avoid the usual tropes, and is fresh and up to date.

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Packs an emotional punch right from the beginning.
A dual timeline story that works really well.
There's a lot of love in this book that shines through.
For me,I think the star of this book is solid,dependable Bill,who seemed like the best man.
Families are complicated,and this one more so than others.
Enjoyable.

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4.5 stars. What a lovely, heart-rending story about the nature of identity, family, and love. I received this ARC yesterday, and finished the book today (on publication day). It was such a good book that I could not put it down.

Right before her father passes, he tells Nell, "You need to know that I've always loved you even though you were never really mine to love." Nell has no idea what her dad means, and her mom's dementia means that her mom is not reliable. Told in two timelines: Now, when Nell and her sisters are adults, their father has just passed away, and their mother is battling dementia; and Then, when Nell is an infant, the storylines converge at the end in a tangle of overwhelming love.

"When Nell’s father makes a deathbed declaration that hints at a long-held secret, it reignites feelings of isolation that have plagued her for years. Her suspicions about the family’s past only deepen when her mother, Annie, who is losing her memories to dementia, starts making cryptic comments of her own.

Thirty-five years earlier, Annie’s life was upended by a series of traumas—one shock after another that she buried deep in her heart. The decisions she made at the time were motivated by love, but she knew even then that nobody could ever understand—let alone forgive—what she did.

As the two women’s stories unravel, a generation apart, Nell finally discovers the devastating truth about her mother’s past, and her own.

In this beautifully observed and emotionally powerful story of identity, memory and the nature of family, Hannah Beckerman asks: To what lengths would you go to protect the ones you love?"

Thanks to NetGalley for the free ARC in exchange for my honest review.

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This is a beautiful and haunting read. It is a touching account of family; motherhood, daughters and parents, tragedy and trauma.

The narrative is shared between Nell and her mother, Annie. Annie is speaking from the past and Nell is focused on the present day where she is dealing with the loss of her father and Annie's deteriorating mental health. A comment made by Nell's father before he died and some things her mother says, cause Nell to re-examine her life .

The novel is richly descriptive, tenderly written and contains wonderfully created characters. There are elements which are difficult to read but they are treated with respect and dignity.

I recommend The Impossible Truths of Love very highly.

Thank you to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

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A very emotionally charged novel.... grips you from the start. Nell is in her thirties and gets a death bed confession from her father that doesn't make any sense.... on top of losing her father, her mother is suffering from dementia and begins to drop confusing comments. Loved how this novel was structured with the dual-point of views between Nell and Annie (her mother), the story slowly unfolds from the past to present. I loved this set up, as a reader each chapter pulls you into the story further and it truly kept me guessing till the end. Beckerman nailed the feelings and emotional state of Annie's loss and really captured the roller-coaster of motherhood and all that is felt. I loved how Nell kind of goes on her own scavenger hunt in her parent's house and slowly uncovers snippets of information that make her second-guess the life she has ever known and the family she thought she knew. The ending was absolutely perfect - as I said, I was guessing till the end but Beckerman took a heart wrenching topic and kind of lifted the entire mood by the end, giving you closure and a feeling of triumph for Nell. Warnings: infant loss, postpartum depression.

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This was a painful but fabulous read about mum Annie and daughter Nell told in dual perspectives of Annie from prior to Nell’s birth and from Nell in the current day struggling to make sense of her dying fathers last words to her. Although I did anticipate what the underlying problem was from the start it was good to read it play out from Annie’s viewpoint and read Nell very gradually unravelling the mystery. This is a very heartfelt look at loss and family ties and the impossible situation is empathetically told.

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An emotional story about family, illness and truths.
Nell is the youngest in her family and has never felt as if she truly fit in.
Her mother always doted on her and never allowed or encouraged Nell to go on class functions, and gatherings outside of her family.
But... why? Told in dual timelines we start to learn the answers.
Her father is now in the present, terminal, and has a final sentence to Nell that rocks her world as she sits at his bedside.
Her mother is not much help, as she has dementia and each day is losing more of herself.

When Nell begins her search to look for answers, she will find so much more!

Well done and definitely not what I was expecting as I read quickly to get to the answers with this woman and her family. There are many twists that kept me guessing even when I was sure I knew the end!

I loved how even while lost in dementia, we ofter can find bits of the past that come through.
This was well described and definitely heartfelt!
I truly enjoyed this book!

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I really enjoyed reading this book.

Nell is the main character. She has a successful academic career at Oxford. As a child she felt left behind as her sisters were much older, and her parents had her when they were older.

Her dad is very supportive of her. She is renowned for her work in stem cell therapies. Her sisters are resentful that she moved away and are very jealous of her success and freedom. They enjoy making negative comments about her any opportunity they get.

Her dad, Bill, is in palliative care, with only a few days left. He tells her a secret that makes no sense to her. Her mum, Annie, is suffering from dementia. What help can she be?

Nell has to know the truth. We go back 35 years in time. Something tragic has happened to Annie that affects everything.

This is a poignant and intriguing story. It is very well written. I was very taken with it and read it over a short period. I highly recommend this book to others.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review. (less

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On his deathbed, Nell’s father alludes to a long held family secret. Her mother’s quickly advancing dementia makes it difficult for Nell to find the truth. Told in dual timelines, then and now, we see how the secret came to be but not before our heart gets ripped out in some of the most gut wrenching scenes. There were moments that felt a little predictable but overall this is an excellent story of family drama, a parent’s love, and desperation.

“Grief, she is learning, is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.”

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Hannah Beckerman's novel, The Impossible Truths of Love, is compelling reading. Rather than romantic love, this beautifully written story is focused on parental love, of every kind. I hardly know where to begin. My own emotions are in such a turmoil having completed this novel, that a mere summary cannot do it justice. I loved this novel. The twin narratives, separated by time and memory, are beautifully complex and yet also incredibly simple. These are two stories of love and the secrets that families try so hard to hide. Beckerman's narrative made me wish that I could have had a re-do on parenting; while at the same time, I relived the loss of my own baby so many years ago. Dredging up those memories tells me that Beckerman's writing contains the power to reach deeply into her readers' psyche. This was a terrific novel. I want to thank the author, publisher, and NetGalley for giving me the opportunity to read and reveal this ARC. It was a privilege to have read Beskerman's novel, The Impossible Truths of Love.

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I read this book very quickly as the story is absorbing and I really wanted to know what was going to happen to the likeable Nell, the main character. There is a lot going on in her life, her parents are both ill, she isn't sure about her boyfriend, her sisters are several years older and not very nice to her, and then suddenly she has a shock from her Dad's last words to her which throw everything out even further. You follow clues all the way through the book, trying to work out what happened, what is happening - just as Nell follows clues about her family. It's a mystery story in some senses, but without any ramping up of suspense at all as you know that the writer will reveal everything in the end and you will know eventually

I liked the structure of the book which flipped between the past and the present. I don't want to include too many spoilers, but it was interesting to get to know the young woman of the past who is also the elderly woman with dementia in the present and try to see both at the same time. Both the past and the present were interesting stories and the book has a good heart and the emotions are authentic not manipulated or manufactured. You felt someone was writing who knew these things or who had some knowledge of them.

There is a lot of sadness in this book, and some people might find the content about loss quite upsetting because you care about these characters and it's not easy to see them suffer and also you might have had similar losses in your own life which will make it hard to read. There are no villains in this book but it's a book which speaks plainly and with authority. The only thing that frustrated me was the ending. I knew it was coming and there wasn't time enough left to deal with it, but I so wanted that final scene to happen in the book and see how it played out! If you read the book you will see what I mean because so much of it leads up to that final scene and then you are left to imagine after everything had been described in great detail throughout the book to that point. I understand, though - it is best to be left wanting more and the final scene would play out in the way you'd expect and I doubt there would be any surprises. Always leave your reader wanting more!

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The struggles grab you from the get-go. I was immediately invested in the family struggles. I thought telling their story in a series of back and forth between the past and present brought a deeper context to their dynamic and created more tension. It’s a book that stays with you.

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This is one of the most beautifully written books that I’ve ever read.
It’s emotionally charged, touching and hugely engaging. The intrigue in this book meant that I had to keep reading until I finished,
I could and I certainly will read this book again.
It might even be one of my favourites. What an amazing book.

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I think I have a new favorite author! What a pleasant surprise Hannah Beckerman's The Impossible Truths of Love was. A totally unexpected novel about what constitutes love of family, parents and siblings. and the heart wrenching effects of the grief over losing a child.. Beckerman writes about it as if she had experienced it herself and I can relate as I have lived through it. You may get used to it, but you never get over it so Annie and Bill's experience is one that will make your cry.

But that's not all this book is about. It' contains a mystery, unexplained until the very end and I will not spoil it. You will have to read it for yourself. Nothing here hits any wrong notes. and at the end you must determine for yourself if Nell Hardy does the right thing.

Thanks to Lake Union for an uncorrected proof in exchange for my review.

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I'm not sure what originally drew me to this book, but once I started, it definitely fell in the hard to put down category. I identified with the main character who is an academic, moved away from home, and always felt different from her sisters. Her sisters always made the decisions and she was supposed to go along, quite a familiar dilemma. Her father makes an observation from his deathbed that leaves Nell wondering about everything.
The plot twists and turns are neatly connected yet takes your imagination on a roller coaster of an adventure. Kudos to the author for allowing me the privilege of an advance review copy and taking me along for the ride.

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On his death bed Nell's father whispered to her: “I want you to know that I’ve always loved you. I never stopped, even for a second. You have to believe that. You need to know that I’ve always loved you even thought you were never really mine to love.” Stunned and having no idea what he is talking about, Nell tries to get him to explain but the morphine has taken hold by then. At the same time that she is losing her father to cancer, Nell is losing her mother to Alzheimer’s Disease. She knows that her mother’s memory is not reliable enough to ask her what her father had meant.

Packing up her mother’s house in preparation of moving her to a senior care facility, Nell finds things that she has trouble making sense of. There are photo albums of her 2 older sister’s first years, but the albums of Nell begin much later. Why would that be? She also learns that there was a boy, born between her and her next older sister, who had died of SIDS. Why has she never heard of him? An old adoption flyer is crumpled up in a ball in the trash bag. What else doesn’t see know?

The story alternates chapters between “Then” and “Now” and through them we learn of the family’s history and its secrets, those long ago and those long kept. "Lies and truth are not always divisible they do not always fit into neat, separate, compartments”.

This book was well written and captivating - I could not put it down. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Thank you to #LakeUnionPublishing #Amazon.com and #NetGalley for this Advanced Reader Copy in exchange for a fair and honest review. Sale Date: October 2021

For more book reviews and recommendations follow me at #EmptyNestReader #instagram #facebook #Goodreads #TheImpossibleTruthsofLove #HannahBeckerman #mysteryfiction #ebooks #familysaga #ARC #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #bookstagramalabama #bookstagrammichigan #bookreviews #bookreviewer #bookrecommendations #OctoberReads #readalittlelearnalittlelivealittle

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Thanks to the publishers and Net Galley for my free e-copy

From the very beginning we know that something terrible has happened in the past to a yet unknown woman and a new born baby. The book is set as a dual timeline, between the past and present , between a mother and daughter.

As Nell the daughter visits her ailing Dad in hospital, he makes a mysterious statement that she can't seem to make sense of or shake off

The language is powerful and the books has topics that cover heavily of death, raw grief. I thought it was very well written, heartfelt and emotional.

Over the course of a few days we follow the family as their history changes and secrets are revealed.

This book definitely kept me wanting to read more and was utterly heartbreaking at points

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Get out the violins from page 1 on. Way too much heavy feeling and repetition! I gave up 30% of the way through the book as it was just more drama, more characters I didn't like and an easy to figure out plot.

Nell is the odd sister out in more ways than none and this is driven home by her dying dad's last words and a very bitchy older sister. Already, it's enough to make you pull your hair out!

Thank you NetGalley for an advance reader copy in exchange for an honest opinion.

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A touching and heart-warming novel about lost babies, grieving parents and enduring love.
The novel switches between Nell’s life as a 35 year old and her childhood with her parents Annie and Bill.
We know that a secret underpins her early life but the truth gradually unfolds through the novel.
This novel really grew on me; it was always enjoyable but about halfway through the plot took a swerve and the characters really came to life. It went from a solid four stars to a good five.
I read the second half at break-neck speed!
Recommended: an intriguing plot about family secrets and a tragic story that you won’t see coming.

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One of those stories that has you gripped from the start mainly because the characters engage so well and you want to know more. I did find the book way too long though and was glad to reach the ending which was a bit unsatisfactory .If the rest of the story had been more concise we might have got a bit of the what happened after I was interested in

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A powerful story of the private lives of mother Annie and daughter Nell, A page turner of a story, deeply felt, finely woven, and sharp as a tack about the unspoken conflict and isolation within families, as well as the lengths people can be driven by both love and loss.
Full of trauma and past secrets keeps you hooked to find out the truth at the end.
Would recommend.

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THE IMPOSSIBLE TRUTHS OF LOVE is a story of elderly parents facing rapid decline and their youngest daughter unraveling secrets about her family that she, somehow, failed to notice. At least that’s how the book carries on for much of the story. The characters are well-developed, the setting believable but something is a bit off for this daughter, Nell, notably different from the rest of her family in brains and appearance. This nagging sense of something-not-quite-right increases as the book progresses and for me, changed the nature of the book. It went from fiction to mystery to page-turner. The ending was completely a surprise to me. This was a great story. I received my copy from the publisher through NetGalley.

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I thought the emotional message was too heavy handed and the hints at the truth were not at all subtle. However, it was a gripping read, although I really did want to know more about what happened next.

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I really enjoyed this book, Thanks Net Galley and the publisher for the opportunity read this story in exchange for an honest review.
What does it mean to be a parent- is it biology, or is it years of love tenderness and nurturing that make us family? . When Nell’s father tells her he loves her, even though she isn’t his to love, on his deathbed, it opens up a whole can of worms. Unfortunately Nell’s mother Anne is in advanced stages of dementia, and is rarely lucid. As Nell ponders the meaning of his words, she uncovers family secrets that were kept from her. There is right and wrong, choices made that haunt those involved for the rest of their lives.
Side note- once again we have a woman who is not believed when she tells them something that doesn’t fit with conventions. Can we please just believe women?

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Nell is losing her father Bill to cancer and her mother Annie to dementia. The always strained relations between her and her sisters Laura and Clare are tauter than ever, and amidst all this escalating anxiety a family mystery of all-encompassing depth threatens to wedge a distance even between Nell and her boyfriend Josh. From her position as Associate Professor in stem cell therapies at UCL, to the domestic day to day of Annie's increasingly disheveled recollections, everything about this suspenseful drama was so believable, I can't wait to read more by Hannah Beckerman.

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‘I want you to know that I have always loved you.’

On his deathbed, Nell Hardy’s father Bill makes a mysterious declaration to his youngest daughter Nell. He says:

‘I want you to know that I’ve always loved you […] You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love.’

Shortly after, before Nell has an opportunity to ask him what he means, Bill dies. Perhaps her mother Annie knows, but she has recently been diagnosed with dementia and communicating with her is challenging.

The story shifts between the present, where Annie is coming to terms with her father’s death and her mother’s dementia, and the past where Annie is overwhelmed by a series of traumatic events. In the present, Annie and her older sisters Clare and Laura are packing, preparing their family home for sale as Annie will move into care. And Nell wonders about what her father said and what it could mean. The three sisters are not close: Nell is 11 years younger than Clare, and 7 years younger than Laura. Nell has had opportunities that her sisters have not, and Clare in particular seems to resent this.

In the past we meet Annie and Bill as a young married couple. Clare and Laura are young, and Annie wants to have another child. What follows is a series of tragedies and secrets, devastating events which ripple through many lives into the present.

‘Grief, she is learning, is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.’

I found this story moving and wondered how I would deal in a similar situation. I admired Bill’s resilience, felt sad for Annie, and wondered where the truth would lead Nell.

Recommended.

Note: My thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with a free electronic copy of this book for review purposes.

Jennifer Cameron-Smith

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A really good story which left you wondering what happened next. Very emotionally charged throughout.

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I was excited to receive an advance copy of The Impossible Truths of Love, having previously read and loved Hannah Beckerman’s If Only I Could Tell You. Unusually, I only glanced at the blurb and immersed myself.

What a book. Nell’s father is dying of cancer and her mother has an aggressive form of dementia which is stealing her memories at pace. A comment from her father throws Nell’s world off balance and into a maze of what may have happened in her family at a time when asking others for answers offers little return.

Told over 2 timelines, Nell tried to unpick what may have happened in the current day and her parents, Annie and Bill, fill in the blanks from her earlier life. I haven’t been able to put it down.

Beautifully written and utterly compelling. 4.5*. It may be a tough read to anyone with kids or moreover if they have lost a child.

Thanks to Amazon Publishing, Lake Union and Netgalley for the ARC.

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When a book lingers in my mind and I keep turning over my reaction to it I know that it's hit the spot! I could feel Annie's pain and desperation, feel her love for her child, this is the best sort of writing from the best sort of author. Truly wonderful word pictures.

I initially found it hard to get involved with the book as the characters didn't come alive for me, I found the lack of relationship between the sisters and the deathbed revelation rather unbelievable but when I got into the second half, when Annie has given birth to Nell, my opinion changed and I was completely absorbed from that point onwards. The anguish that Annie suffers, the fact that she can't make herself heard and then her gradual acceptance is beautifully done.

I wish I could say more but it's difficult without giving too much away, suffice it to say that I'm sure I would have done exactly the same as Annie and that's why the story is still at the forefront of my thoughts... what if it had happened to me...

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A deathbed confession, well, not really but a deathbed conundrum is what Bill Hardy gave to his daughter Nell and one that she simply can't forget.

I absolutely adored this read, which is quite unlike my normal choice of reading matter. Why? Well it had a keen eye for observation of family relationships, the secrets that are buried in the most conventional of surroundings along with the contrariness of emotions.

At the time we are reading Annie, Nell's mother is suffering with early-onset dementia and is unable to respond to Nell's enquiries but as the reader we go back in time to hear Annie's voice from before Nell was born. Her story is heart-breaking and has a strong thread of realism running through it.

This story of love, loss and siblings is outstanding and I highly recommend it.

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This is the second novel I've read by Hannah Beckerman and I was so thrilled to receive this digital ARC. Beckerman writes so beautifully and with such love, compassion and empathy for her characters. I was completely drawn into the life of Nell and her family- her recently deceased father, her mother living with dementia and her two older sisters. Nell is close to her parents but has always felt a little on the outside of the relationship with her sisters. The words of her father just before he dies lead her to believe there is a family secret and the novel focuses on this. This was such an emotional read for me, it touched on many issues in my own life- including bereavement and challenging sibling relationships. Beckerman also sensitively deals with dementia, caring for older family members and post partum depression. However these are not 'issues' in a Beckerman novel but parts of family life that are portrayed gently but deeply. A beautiful and recommended read.
Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read and review this digital ARC.

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This is Hannah Beckerman’s third novel, but the first that I’ve read. From start to finish this book was filled with raw emotion. I’ve never experienced the loss and trauma that Annie did as a young mother, but through this work I felt the pain that she suffered, and felt really, really sad for her. Thirty five years later, Annie’s husband declares his love to Nell, his third daughter from his deathbed, which leads Nell to explore her past and family origins, whilst enduring the loss of her much loved father, and the tense relationship with her two older sisters Clare and Laura. It becomes apparent that Nell is different to her sisters, and throughout her childhood she’s been protected and held closely by her mother – is that what has led her to move away from the family home?
Elsa has worked with Nell’s father for many years, and is very fond of Nell – at times, it’s hinted that her relationship with the family may be more than employee/business partner – encouraging the reader to want to find out more.
I found myself questioning the circumstances around Nell’s birth in 1986. I’m sure at that time more would have been done to help Annie and manage/explore her situation more (trying not to give away spoilers!)
I was emotionally invested in this book, the rawness of Annie’s pain and suffering as a new mother drew me in, but also the challenges faced by Nell as she explores her past and family origins. Truly a page turner, I don’t normally enjoy books that flip from THEN and NOW, but Beckerman has done this well, and the pieces of the puzzle come together.
I read this book in only a couple of days, it’s easy to read, and the characters are likeable, however I felt short-changed with the ending – it’s not what I was hoping for – although may be what the author is hoping for – because a couple of days later I’m still thinking of this book, and wondering …
This is a great read and I highly recommend it – off now to read the others of Hannah Beckerman.
Thank you to Netgalley and Amazon Publishing UK for this ARC.

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Nell's dad, Bill is dying of cancer, on his death bed he says to her "You need to now that I have always loved you even though you were never really mine to love." Unfortunately Nell's mother, Annie has early on-set dementia and cannot answer Nell's namy questions about her father's statement. This beautiful story is told in two time lines of Now and Then and the book is from Nell and Annie's point of view.

The then chapters were so heartbreakingly sad and what poor poor Annie went through all those years ago. The writing was so real I truly felt Annie's pain. The now chapters had me cheering Nell on to find out the truth about her background. I didn't like Nell's sisters very much, they were bitches to be honest. I read this story in one sitting, it had my emotions all over the place and I liked that it touched on some major issues with heart. I highly recommend this very emotive read. All. The. Stars.

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This book was morbidly depressing for the sake of it - not a pleasant read. I didn't feel like the rest of the book's substance made up for the miserable hour and a half I spent on it, though the plot twist was somewhat interesting.

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This is such a gripping and emotive read about some sensitive and hard hitting family issues. It was raw, breath taking and awe inspiring, I couldnt put it down.

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Nell has always felt different to her family despite being cherished by her parents. Her sisters live locally but Nell went to university and moved away to a high achieving job. Chance words from her dad make her wonder where exactly she came from. It’s a good tale that keeps us guessing and involved.

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Nell is by the bedside of her dying father when he tells her how much he loves her 'even though you were never mine to love.' These turn out to be his last words to her and she is left with a sense of mystery which deepens when her mother, struggling with Alzheimer's, lets slip some other information which challenges everything Nell thought she know about herself and her family.

The novel is written in turn from the perspectives of Nell in the present day and Annie, her mother, over thirty years earlier. We see Nell struggle with the mystery of what her father said to her and we also see Annie struggle with grief and depression. This becomes quite repetitive at times and I'm afraid I was totally unmoved by Annie's grief because of this. I found I didn't engage with any of the characters until near the end when Nell came to life a bit more and also when a subsidiary character took front stage.

This was a difficult book for me to like. It should have been heartrending but in fact the main emotion I felt was ennui at having to read about the same thing over and over. Thanks to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC.

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Thank you Netgalley and Amazon Publishing for the opportunity to read and review this.

This is a beautiful and heart-aching story to read. Told between 'Now' following Nell's thoughts, and 'Then' following Annie's thoughts, through their grief and tragedy's that follow and the impact it has on their life.

As you read on, you begin to understand the thought process and pain both characters go through, as more secrets are revealed, which ultimately makes them who they are at the end of the story.

Beautifully written. A definite must-read.

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The jacket of Impossible Truths of Love hints at long held family secrets, and I don't want to spoil anything for readers, but those secrets could have triggering potential for some. It ran a little heavy for me, but I think it was well written and will certainly touch the heartstrings of those it doesn't hit too close to home for.

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The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman

As Nell's dad lies in hospital dying of cancer he tells her that he always loved her, even though she was never really his to love. This sets off a chain of events as Nell tries to uncover what he meant by this. Nell's mum has dementia and is increasingly confused, so her comments raise more questions than they answer.

WOW! What a book, one of my favourites of the 70+ I have read this year! I raced through it as I had to find out what really happened and I guessed wrong at least 3 times! I loved the dual timeline, Nell's mum Annie in the past and Nell in the present, and the characters were all so well drawn. The writing was exquisite - such beautiful prose and some really heartbreaking descriptions of events. I'll be checking out other books by this author. Very highly recommended - an exceptional book!

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC of this book.

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Lovely. Beautifully-written book about choices and love and family - primarily told through Nell, daughter to aging parents and sister to complicated siblings. I related to much of this as helping and watching aging parents is a sobering, scary, sad experience common to do many of us. There is a clever twist which is fine in a respectful way that doesn’t seem hokey or forced. I’ll read more from this wonderful author. So grateful to Lake Union / Amazon UK publishing for the advanced copy.

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Thanks to NetGalley for the preview of this book.

First, HARD warning. No where in the book description does this book indicate it is about loss, family members death, and dealing with grief. If you have recently experienced such a loss, or the loss of a child, this could be a very difficult book to read- it hits very close to home, and hits hard. I was unprepared.

Normally this is the type of book I really enjoy. Family saga, relationships, hidden secrets. It started off very good (with the exception of the hard gut punch from loss) and moving right along. But about half way through, the writer begins to unravel. In the interest of keeping suspense, she gets very wordy and begins talking in circles. I was getting impatient and thinking "enough already". A few of the story lines are a bit unrealistic in their pacing (pieces come together too conveniently), and one of the characters is unnecessarily mean. As the book moves on, she begins to repeat herself, and gets a bit preachy in the "lessons learned" section. By the last 10% I just wanted the book to be over. I get it, you've drilled the difficulties home! It is too bad, because with a little bit of editing, a bit of cutting, this book could have been very good all the way through. The book is emotional and exciting, but by the end it looses the rhythm.

I would try another book by this author, but I hope she would be a bit more practiced and brush it up a bit before publishing.

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Wow. Thanks to #NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for an honest review

Once I saw this recommended by #MarianRecomends I knew I wanted to read it. Fortunately a speedy response from the publisher was forthcoming * and I dived in straight away.
This is an emotional wringer. The ordinary family tale of a happily married couple, and the surprise pregnancy which brings Danny into the family. Life after that is never the same.
Told in my favourite style, the dual timeline: the slow unfold of the past, twinned with life in the ‘now’ , We see how the past impacted the lives of those in the present , even though they were unaware of all that had occurred. Insight into the characters slowly emerge like the pictures developing in a photographer’s dark room.

Now that her parents are ill, her dad hospitalised, her mum with dementia experiencing fleeting visits to her own past from the present day, Nell is trying to uncover the unnerving secrets across which she is stumbling during the inevitable house clearance.
Brilliantly heart rending.

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I have to confess I wasn’t convinced when I first started reading #TheImpossibleTruthsofLove by Hannah Beckerman. There were a few words I had to look up, which always alienates me. ( I worry that the book will be too high-brow for me and hard work.) If you feel the same, DO NOT let it put you off. The book is really accessible and engaging. Once I got into it I did not want to put it down and absolutely loved it.
This is Nell’s book, but the insight into her mother Annie’s life through the flashbacks were fascinating and well done. I really enjoyed joining Nell on her journey to try and understand her past and her place in her family. The story is clever and extremely moving.
Highly recommended.

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Every mother’s worst nightmare. It is impossible to imagine something so traumatic revisiting any woman. Yet for this mother a second series of events occur that will cast a long shadow over her life, her happiness and that of everyone in her family. A tragic mistake, bureaucracy intransigent in the face of any suggestion an error may have occurred , followed by a lifetime of events based on errors of judgement. A heartbreaking story from which there can be only losers. Any conclusion only more devastating than a train crash in slow motion whilst the reader awaits the final denouement. Many thanks to author, publisher and NetGalley for this ARC which has succeeded in drawing on every emotion possible. from a reader.

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I would describe this as a slow-moving, well-written mystery. It’s not at all like a typical mystery, but when Nell’s father makes a cryptic deathbed comment under the influence of morphine, Nell begins to wonder if there is something behind the statement that would explain why she’s always felt like such an outsider from her family. She’s several years younger than her older sisters, and she was so gifted in the sciences she went on to earn a Ph.D. in genetics research, wildly more educated than the rest of her family. When her mother, who is battling dementia, also makes strange remark in between moments of lucidity, Nell decides to investigate more.

The story alternates between the grief of the matriarch, Annie, after she loses her five-week-old son to sudden infant crib death and the present, in which Nell is grieving the loss of two parents because even though Annie is still alive, she doesn’t recognize her daughters much of the time.

My problem with this novel is that the grief of these two women is so well-written, I had no choice but to live their grief along with them, which made this such an unenjoyable read, and I simply couldn’t wait to be done with it. I speed read the last fourth just to get it over with.

Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read this novel.

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Amazing book that tugs at your heartstrings and won't let go. Even having finished the book yesterday I can't get it out of my mind. So many social issues are touched on including dementia, adoption, and the inner workings of the family dynamic. The characters are engaging and the storyline well written.

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As I have loved this authors previous books I was eager to get this one started and I certainly wasnt disappointed , as it lived up to my expectation and more. This story touches on many sensitive subjects which takes you on a journey of love, loss, grief and dementia to name but a few.
Nell is the central character who is left bemused when her dying father Bill utters words that Nell cant comprehend and as her mother Annie is suffering from dementia Nell is forced to embark on a mission to seek out answers. This story is told through both Nell and Annie and both are written with raw emotion that is heart wrenching.
The Impossible Truths of Love is a fabulous tale that will stay with me for quite a while and is definitely worthy of 5 stars.
My thanks to Net Galley and the publishers for the digital ARC.

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To simplify, this is the story of Nell who was swapped as a baby when born. The swapping was not intentional but the carelessness of the hospital staff. Nell discovers this secret after her father passes away and her mom struggling with dementia. So she has to grapple with the sense of identity, her place in the family she has known all her life and grief.

I must say this book has been an interesting ride. Grief is the major theme. Losing one's parent to the unknown as well as losing a baby to SIDS aka Cot Death. So I would advise you to read with caution. I really liked the writing.

Despite dealing with heavy topics, it felt light, natural and sort of mysterious. I did enjoyed this book a lot which is unexpected. I particularly like the ending which lead to numerous possibilities. Overall, do give it a read when you want are in the mood to contemplate.

Thank you NetGalley and Amazon Publishing UK for the ARC.

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What a wonderful page-turner!
Beautiful and heartbreaking in equal measures, The Impossible Truths of Love follows the story of Nell as she discovers her family have been keeping a secret from her.
What follows is a sensitively drawn story of grief and love and I don't mind admitting to reading some through watery eyes.
For Nell there is a mystery at the heart of her thread that had me turning the pages for answers, but Annie's story is equally gripping. Hannah Beckerman carefully weaves a picture of a grief stricken family that really touched me.

Thank you to NetGalley and to Lake Union Publishing for the opportunity to read this advanced copy.

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A really beautiful and poignant read . When Nell's father Is dying he says something to her which unsettles her and as her mother has dementia she can't ask her what it was he meant. The story alternates between now and then and she discovers a secret that will have a great effect on her life. Dont want to spoil the the story by giving anything away but it is beautifully written and it tells of love,loss,family and holds your interest from the beginning. A brilliant 5🌟read I loved it

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This tale is of a young woman, Nell, who starts to query her biological relationship to her parents after her father offers a questionable statement on his deathbed. Nell questions if she is who she thought she was, her difficult relationships with her sisters and why her mother was always so protective of her.

It explores parental and sibling relationships and the secrets that families keep which become skeletons in closets. Nell uncovers some momentous family history that was kept from her by her parents.

I particularly liked Elsa's character, although there was doubt placed upon her role by Nell's mother Annie.
Plenty to keep you guessing in this story.

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Completely gripping, I struggled to put this story down. Told from two alternating perspectives in the past and present, it kept me guessing the whole way through. Well written a characters that made you care, unimaginable loss, love and family relationships. Just wonderful.

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Nell always felt like the odd family member out, but a deathbed confession from her dad “you were never really mine to love” has Nell very confused. Annie, Nell’s mother is suffering from dementia and is giving Nell very confusing messages. As Nell is trying to decipher these messages, she soon discovers that her mom has buried the most difficult heartbreaking parts of her past very deep.

This story is told in two different time frames “then” and “now.” And from two different perspectives Nell’s and her mom Annie’s. This book broke my heart! It was a beautiful story of family and love, and the bonds that bind you together. I thought the story was very well written, and even though it is not a thriller at all the mystery of the secret kept me guessing. I had a difficult time putting this down because I just had to know how it all played out.

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The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman. Tells the story of Nell who is with her dying father....I always loved you even though you were not mine to love. This was a well written story with Then and Now story lines. The characters are descriptive. You can feel the emotions emitted from the characters. The distain from Clare, confusion from mom with dementia and the depression after Danny's death and anxiety when it was her baby. Very well done. I will recommend this book. Thank you for the opportunity to review this book.

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A really beautiful book. The writing is just wonderful - so emotional and poignant. The characters are so well written and I really enjoyed the 2 different time lines and seeing the story develop. Just lovely.

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Netgalley review
This is a beautifully crafted book, telling the incredibly real story of Nell, following a cryptic revelation on her father’s deathbed. Nell is much younger than her sisters, with an acute awareness that she has always been over protected by her mother and slightly resented by her siblings for being the favourite. The Then story is told in parallel 35 years earlier following Annie’s struggles with loss and Bill’s attempts to support her, whilst caring for his daughters. The Now story is an empathetic journey of coping with elderly parents passing away and cognitive decline. Nell eventually discovers the truth, bringing an overwhelming understanding of her family’s narrative but is she willing to share her parents secret. A truly gripping book.

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Having loved Beckerman's previous novel I have been itching to read this one since I saw it was due and it very quickly jumped to the top of my tbr pile once I was approved for a copy.

On his death bed Nell's father's last coherent statement works its way into Nell's consciousness and leads to the discovery of long hidden family secrets.
Beckerman's skill in this book for me was that although I got a sense of the mystery surrounding Nell I discovered it along with her rather than guessing the plot early on.

There's a *lot* of issues covered in this book and I think that it isn't a book to pick up as a feel good read. That said every theme was sensitively handled and as it was more of a mystery than a character study I didn't thing any was glossed over too quickly.
You're likely to need tissues but after a run of less than stellar novels this one was a pleasure to read, and one that I had to stay up late just to find out who/what/where/when and of course why!

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Wonderfully written novel of family relationships. Very heartbreaking and authentic in so many ways.

Great read!

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Hannah Beckerman’s The Impossible Truths of Love is about identity, memory, secrets and what makes a family. The emotionally engaging novel carries the reader on a rollercoaster of mystery, keeping you guessing as it twists and turns, as it works its way to the end.

Nell’s father, when dying, tells Nell that he loves her, even though she was never really his to love. Those words are “like a bruise on her memory that will not heal”. This hint of a secret, Nell feels, might explain why she has felt separate from her family, particularly her two sisters and her mother. Nell’s search for the meaning behind her father’s words is complicated as her mother Annie is losing her memory to dementia and starts making mysterious comments of her own.

The story switches between the past and the present, giving you just enough information at each turn, but leaving you desperate to find out what happened and will happen.

The past is Annie’s story which is a series of traumatic events, all of which scarred her and made her make decisions which would otherwise be incomprehensible. Beckerman portrays Annie’s mental illness with compassion and veracity. The writing is raw, visceral and moving. Annie’s feelings are described so vividly that you feel the emotions personally. As Annie realises, “Grief […] is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.” Grief and love define Annie.

Nell’s story is about the present and coming to terms with the death of her father and the virtual loss of her mother. It is about her relationships with family, friends, her boyfriend, and with herself. The cryptic hints of a secret made her feel that “[I]n her mind, the tapestry of her family history begins to unstitch, the fabric loosening at the seams.”, a past that doesn’t reconcile with her memories. Memories are malleable, they play us false. Do we remember what we choose rather than what is real? Nell considers the strangeness between the imagined identity of little Nell and the reality of Nell as an adult. Are they the same or are they different?

Nell’s experience of her mother’s dementia is described with tenderness and puzzlement, and a sense of mourning even though Annie is still alive. Nell has conflicted feelings about her mother which makes for an interesting analysis of the mother/daughter bond.

This is a story of “…a quartet of lives shattered by a momentary mistake …” with ongoing repercussions. It explores big themes, handled sensitively and it is also an enthralling mystery which keeps on challenging the reader. I loved it.

Thanks to #NetGalley and #LakeUnionPublishing for the eARC.

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A cryptic death-bed comment by a father to his daughter, and the beginning of a wonderfully written mystery. My first Hannah Beckerman novel and definately not my last. Love, family and life all evolve in this emotional and heartwarming story. Thank you #NetGalley for the advanced opportunity

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When Nell’s father makes a mysterious deathbed declaration it reignites her long-held feelings of not belonging within her family. Grappling with the death of her father and the slow loss of her mother, Annie, before her eyes from dementia, Nell searches for the truth behind her father’s compassion while also trying to dampen her feelings of being an outsider. In a second timeline, we go back thirty-five years to when Annie’s world was turned upside down by a series of traumatic events.

This is a beautifully written dual timeline novel about love, family, memory, long-held secrets, and self-discovery, this book takes you on an emotional rollercoaster from beginning to end. The author has chosen to explore some of the most traumatic and devastating events that a family can go through in this book such as the loss of a child, dementia, the sudden death of a parent and decades-old family secrets.

This is a first for me by the author and one I enjoyed and would read more of their work. The book cover is eye-catching and appealing and would spark my interest if in a bookshop. Thank you very much to the author, publisher and Netgalley for this ARC.

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My second book by Hannah and it did not disappoint.
Nell heads home to spend time with her poorly father and dementia-afflicted mother, when her father lets slip a sentence that has Nell questioning all that she knows to be true about her family life.
In s dual timeline, the life of Nell’s mum is told from her much younger days and the trauma that has affected her life from that point forward.
I really enjoyed this book and would recommend it. Thank you NetGalley for my review copy.

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Thank you to Netgalley and Amazon Publishers for this uncorrected proof for me to read, review and comment.

This is a beautiful and emotional read. It will have a special place in the hearts of parents who have experienced the pain and grief at the death of a child.

The read follows two time zones, that of Nell in the present with aging parents, mother Annie now with dementia and father Bill ill in hospital. It's during a visit to see him that he quietly makes a strange remark to her which sets about gradual wheels of discovery in motion for Nell.

The past revolves around the young wife and mother Annie, in a normal village environment indicative of so many everyday people. Annie's life is wrapped up in her family and Bill, a furniture maker of ordinary standards. Both are not risk takers, with Europe so close to their shores only one trip has ever been made.

An unexpected pregnancy occurs for which Annie has mixed feelings, insecurities about a new baby in the house, her two daughters Clare and Laura are now of an age that they are pretty independant, going to school, friends and activities for which she simply has to shuffle them around. However this pregnancy has thrown her a curve ball and at the same time, Bill has put on an assistant, a young woman, Elsa for which adds to Annie's insecurity, why such a young woman? All these insecurities of course fall away with the new baby at home, a son, Danny.

Annie's life changes with this new baby boy, she is revitalised, he becomes the centre of her life. The baby smell is so intoxicating, the clothes and linen all become heavy with baby scent which forms part of the bonding for mother and child. One morning Annie wakes to find that she has overslept, anxious that Danny hasn't woken for a feed she goes to check on him. An ambulance is called and he is rushed to the hospital.

From here on Annie's world falls apart, her grief is beyond redemption, so deep, she leaves her normal world. Unable to function, she only moves from her bedroom to that of the nursery when she is alone in the house and retreats there to spend her day with the scent of her baby still there.

Back in the present Bill dies leaving his daughters to arrange for the care of Annie. Nell, much younger than her two sisters, has a difficult relationship with them. She is the only one to have gone to university and with her work has needed to move away. While she has tried to assist her ageing parents, most of the responsibility has fallen to Clare and Laura for which there is resentment from Clare. Without consulting her the house has been sold and a suitable place for their mother has been found. In the meantime, packing has to be done and for the immediate weekend Nell stays with her mother. During this time, Annie's disjointed memories are revealed and without much sense, fragments being voiced. Nell discovers a large amount of newspaper cuttings and photo albums but unlike the photos of her older sisters there are none of her as a baby.

The past, Annie's life does not change even with Bill suggesting adoption, she is adamant, she couldn't love another person's baby. Finally she does fall pregnant again. There are issues with the birth of this baby girl and the stay in hospital is longer than normal. Annie once again finds herself on an emotional precipice, she denies the baby given to her to feed, adamant it's the wrong baby. Checks are made again and again. There hasn't been any mix up with the baby wristbands. The baby girl, Nell is brought home and soon life returns to a sort of normal but Annie becomes overly protective of Nell and even objects to her going to the workshop to be with her father, Nell finds a real friend in Elsa, the young assistant.

The present, Nell, while in the midst of packing discovers details of Danny, a child she never knew existed. Her question is why was he never mentioned and why was it kept as a secret from her. Elsa is the only person she feels comfortable asking, who was Danny? From here on Nell's life becomes a journey of discovery.

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This is a terrific family mystery. Nell's visiting her dying father when he says something mysterious that catches her by surprise, and before she has a chance to ask him more about it, he passes away. She keeps that information in the back of her mind as she helps her two older sisters clear their parents' house in preparation for moving their mother (who suffers from dementia) into a nursing facility. The story is told from two eras - then and now - and the author did a terrific job of keeping both story lines going. There were several times during my reading when I thought I knew just what had happened, only to be surprised that everything wasn't what I thought. This would have been a 5-star read for me, except the ending of the book was drawn-out too long for me - and then ended rather abruptly. But even so, I'd recommend this book to anyone who enjoys family sagas or mysteries. Many thanks to Net Galley, Lake Union Publishing, and Ms. Beckerman for the ARC of this book.

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Thank you to Netgalley and Amazon Publishers for this I corrected proof for me to read and review.
Having loved ‘If Only I Could Tell You’ I was so excited to read this newest release. I immediately got drawn in by Nell’s fathers comment ‘you were never really mine to love’ and this was made even more intriguing by the mystery surrounding Annie’s hospital stay. It had me turning the pages and reading well into the night.
My heart broke reading about Annie’s grief for Danny, I can’t express how beautifully this was written. I found the story moving and it is one that will stay with me for a long time.

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‘The Impossible Truths of Love’ is a novel to be savoured. Hannah Beckerman writes sensitively about the most painful events and, in doing so, acknowledges the importance of family. As the novel’s central character, Nell, a scientist in her mid-30s, mourns the death of her father and the loss of her mother to dementia, she learns that, ‘Grief…is love’s echo. It is not possible to have one without the other.’
So, this is a story about death but, likewise, it is a story of birth, of a mother’s love for her children, and of a father’s determination to keep his family together. Whilst at the heart of her tale lie harrowing events, Beckerman also writes convincingly about everyday family life - daily habits, friendly neighbours, playground outings, affectionate gestures, sibling rivalry.
This is a moving and thought-provoking story, prompting the reader to consider many facets of love. Nell recognises that her parents’ ‘…love for her was at once the greatest truth and the most profound lie. An act of infinite kindness and acute selfishness.’ This paradox is at the centre of the novel and reminds the reader just how complex longstanding relationships often are.
My thanks to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing UK, Lake Union Publishing for a copy of this novel in exchange for a fair review.

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A very honest and moving story regarding families, secrets and how we cope with grief
I think that though it deals with very raw and deep subjects, this book is truly a tribute to love

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Kindle Unlimited subscribers, please listen up. If you’re in the mood for an intense, emotional, and extremely powerful family drama, I have just the book recommendation for you. The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Berkerman is told from two points of view: Nell in present day, and her mother, Annie from thirty-five years earlier. Nell is curious about, and suspicious of some events from her past. As Nell tries to put the puzzle pieces of her childhood together, Annie tells us her side of the story, and the mystery begins to unravel for the reader. The secrets, lies, multiple twists and surprises in this novel had me absolutely floored. Beckerman describes Annie’s experience as a mother in the most raw and realistic way. Prepare to be completely shocked, and constantly guessing. The topics covered in this remarkable story are so important. There’s strong themes of motherhood, sisterhood, trauma, depression, identity, loss, and grief. There’s a major trigger warning involving the loss of a child, so please keep that in mind. Feel free to DM me for more details. I’ll be recommending this new release for many months to come. 4.5/5 stars for The Impossible Truths of Love!

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Thank you to Net Galley and Lake Union Publishing for the chance to read and review this book. The opinions expressed are my own.

This is a wonderful story about family secrets. As her father is dying, he says something really strange to his daughter Nell. This makes her start to question her identity and where she came from. She tries to talk to her mother Annie, but her mother is suffering from dementia. Slowly, Nell begins to find out the answers and discovers the secret her mother has been hiding all these years. The book was very well written, with very believable characters. I really liked the ending because the author let the reader know what Nell was planning to do, but not how it turned out. I recommend this book. It is a good story!

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“Grief, [Nell] is learning, is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.” The Impossible Truths of Love takes us on a journey of a mother and daughter’s story, set 35 years apart, intertwining parental love, heartbreak, identity, and secrets that have the potential to tear a family apart but also bind them together. This tender, poignant story will leave you raw with emotions that will touch you on so many different levels.

“I love you… I need you to know that. . . . even if you were never really mine to love.” Nell’s dad makes a death-bed declaration to her that leaves her confused and perplexed, but with her mom having dementia and her memory quickly fading away – and feeling disconnected from her two older sisters, she doesn’t know where to turn. This book is a perfect puzzle, where Hannah Beckerman, chapter by chapter titled “Then” and “Now,” leaves Nell pieces that slowly begin to form into a full picture.

I can’t put into words the thoughts and feelings that I had while reading this heartbreaking novel; the depth of the grief described hits you in a way that is inexplicable. I lost my grandfather to Alzheimer’s when I was 7, and I remember visiting him the very last time. He told me that my grandmother was out grocery shopping and I had just missed her (she died twos prior). I would read a line, a paragraph, a chapter of this book and try to connect the mother, Annie, and my grandfather, Ralph. I would literally put the book down and try to remember the man I never really got to know – where my main memory of him is of him not remembering his life. I wonder if his thoughts and memories were just on the cusp like Annie’s, barely out of reach.

I read this book at night while my two year was sleeping next to me. He is the youngest of three, 4 years younger than my middle child. A perfect baby, at day 16 he slowly entered into a coma and was diagnosed with hypothermia and with no active mental state (I live in south Florida). You know it’s a bad sign when the ER doctors already start offering you condolences in their own way to begin to prepare you for the worst. However, after over a week in the NICU and every test imaginable, he pulled through and we never found out what was wrong. When we were checking out of the hospital, a doctor pulled me aside and said that if that happened in the middle of the night we would have woke up to a deceased child and it would have just been listed as SIDS. “Just,” like it was no big deal and how lucky we were. I am overprotective of him, more so than my two older boys. When your heart is on the verge of breaking, there is a hole left that you constantly seek to fill. Life changed that day for my husband and I, and “we were the lucky ones.” I can’t even imagine the what-ifs.

This book reminds you that there isn’t one shape of grief; grief is not a puzzle piece that can easily fit into the same picture. This in turn, suggests that we do not always know what others are feeling or going through, and that maybe we shouldn’t be quick to judge. Likewise, this book teaches you that love is a journey, and it’s not a straight line. How far would you go for the people you love? What would you do to protect them? If you lie to protect someone, is that still unacceptable? I don’t think I even contemplated how close the line is between love and grief before.

Maybe there are some impossible truths in life that aren’t ours to question. In law school one of my favorite Professors always used to quote Sherlock Holmes: “When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.” It’s hard to believe that the truth sometimes isn’t black or white – sometimes the reasonings for our actions lie within the gray area in between. For parents Annie and Bill, numerous impossible truths define and shape their family, leaving the reader captivated by the events and their shocking outcomes.

I do warn, this is not a book to get lost in and escape – this is a thought-provoking novel meant more for a good cry and introspection than an escape into a different world. I thank NetGalley for allowing me to read this novel in return for my honest opinions, while are all mine!

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This was a deeply emotional book, one I could hardly put down. It is a moving story of identity, love, memory, loss, family, and relationships. The format of back and forth, between "then" and "now" worked so well for the narrative. It brought such a tension and a slow reveal of the story, bringing both Annie and Nell's sides of the story together in the end. Well paced and intriguing, the story grabs you from the first chapter. I found the hints along the way kept my attention.

Annie's trauma is so well articulated, with the reader being caught up in her tragedy and her emotional turmoil The reveal of the last few chapters and the realizations she went through hit hard.

This is a book about family, about love, relationships, trauma and tragedy, parenthood. loss and resilience. It packs an emotional punch and there are some parts that left me completely wrung out.

It is an intense read, a story of family and secrets that are revealed. A story about a search for the truth, a story about a family's devastation and the secret they carried forward. A profound study of grief, in its many forms.

The writing is poignant, at times lyrical, at times stark and painful, always riveting.. Nell and Annie's POVs alternate and it is fascinating to see the facets of themselves slowly revealed by the narrative and to see how the pieces we are given as readers come together to solve the puzzle in the end.



This may be a difficult read for some readers. It is stark and pulls no punches on the traumatic events set forth in the narrative.

Four and a half stars. Highly recommended. Be aware of the subject matter as some of the topics may be sensitive for certain readers.

My thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the eARC.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is a poignant book that examines the grief and trauma brought about by an accidental switching of new born infants which apparently only one set of parents is truly privy to. As they grow to love and adore their daughter, all the while knowing that she might some day be taken away, no one believes nor understands the sorrow and fear they have as they are confronted by what seems like a crime they have unwittingly committed. The "then" and "now" presentation of the plot of the lives of the parents and then the daughter who shares no DNA with them contrasts the widespread and deep influence of this horrible mistake with the pride and love the parents have for their daughter. Family, loss, love, and the deep connection the parents have for their child runs vividly through the book and keeps the reader wondering to the last page what the family secret really is.

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Beckerman writes a beautiful novel of the lose and care of an elderly parent and the secrets left behind. “Bill Hardy is on his deathbed when he fixes daughter Nell with a troubled, urgent stare. “You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love,” he tells her. His words are the catalyst for Hannah Beckerman’s third novel, a tangled tale in which the unravelling of family secrets exposes dilemmas of startling moral complexity.” This is a beautiful novel written in alternate voices as the main character Nell tries to untangle death bed whisper. The characters are well developed and family conflict feels real and relatable. Highly recommend. Thank you for this advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

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Hannah Beckerman writes a n amazing book of family and secrets. The main character Nell is with her father, Bill, on his deathbed when he makes a cryptic remark that leads Nell searching. Her mother , Anne, is slipping into dementia so she can not settle the unease that Nell has about her life. Nell has never been close to her sisters who are much older than she is so she can’t go to them either. Nell needs to find out and what she uncovers shows the destruction of family secrets to the entire family.
Thank you NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing for providing an ARC for a review of this book. I will be looking for more Hannah Beckerman books.

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This author is new to me and from the get go I felt in such safe hands. She gave time for me to be 'in the story' without losing pace.

The characters felt like people you know and, even with their flaws, I cared about them. The sibling relationships were credible and resonated.



A fabulous story and a great read. Loved it.

Highly recommend

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{Thank you to Amazon Publishing for my gifted review copies}

I love a good family drama that uncovers family secrets - and this one ended up being the perfect weekend read. It had enough substance yet also kept me turning the pages to learn more.

Told through two points of view, Nell in the present day and her mother, 35 years before- Author Hannah Beckerman shines at unfolding the complexities of Nell's childhood. {I do want to include a content warning for infant loss and postpartum depression as it does include these heavier topics...}⁣

I really enjoyed Hannah Beckerman's last novel, If Only I Could Tell You, and I loved this one even more! I look forward to reading what Beckerman comes out with next and I highly recommend adding this one to your fall reading list.

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Many thanks to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing UK/Lake Union Publishing for gifting me a copy of the wonderful family drama by Hannah Beckerman - 4.5 stars rounded up!

Told in two time periods - present day and 35 years ago - and from the dual perspectives of Annie in the past and her daughter, Nell, in the present. Nell has come home because her father is close to death and he whispers a cryptic message to her before he passes. Her mother is suffering from dementia and Nell and her two sisters are tasked with moving her out of the family home and into a care facility. Her mother also makes some comments to Nell - but with her mother's state of mind, Nell is not sure how to interpret them. In the past, we learn of Annie and Bill's life and tragedies and the secrets they have vowed to keep.

This was such an emotional read and the author did a wonderful job of really getting me invested into the lives of these characters and the choices they were forced to make. It's also a good reflection on what it means to be part of a family and what we would do to protect those we love.

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OMG!!! This was so emotional and pulled at every heart string I have and also a nice break from all the thrillers. This book was all about belonging and feeling part of a family, which anyone can identify with and everyone wants. Well written and nostalgic.

Highly recommended. I look forward to more books by this author.

Thanks to Netgalley, Hannah Beckerman and Amazon Publishing UK for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Already available: 10/2/21

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Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book. What a wonderful book. Families and their secrets. It was emotional, touching and enthralling from beginning to end. So beautifully written, it would be hard to not be moved by this read. Highly recommended.

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I usually write relatively long, wordy reviews about how much I like a book, except for my nitpicky complaints.

I can't really do that with "The Impossible Truths of Love"-- it was beautifully written, emotional, and exactly what I needed to read. The story follows Nell, a woman in her 30s that is dealing with death of one parent and the mental deterioration of another. At the same time, she is having to deal with the burden that her parents have lied or kept some sort of family secret from her. She only has a vague comment from her dying father to work with: "I have always loved you, even though you were never really mine to love."

I don't usually love these type of family drama stories, but this particular one really resonated with me. Hannah Beckerman's portrayal of family relationships included the highs and lows of parenting, the grief of losing a loved one, and the impact of how decisions made can be felt decades later.

Thank you for writing this amazing book Ms. Beckerman. I'm not someone who easily cries over books, but this one made me cry both happy and sad tears, and I love you for it :)

Thank you Netgalley and Amazon Publishing for an e-copy of this book. I can't think of enough words to express how deeply this book impacted me, other than to add that I highly recommend this book to pretty much anyone, regardless of whether they usually read family dramas or not.

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As a reader who tends to favour fast-paced thrillers with twists on every page, this novel took a little while to ease into, as it is best described as a ‘slow burn’. Beautifully written, Beckerman introduces us to her fictional heroine Nell, who is torn between caring for her mother, who has dementia, and being present for her dying father. Heavily sedated with morphine in his last hours of life, he makes a cryptic comment about her familial heritage that leads Nell to investigate her backstory and the many secrets her parents have kept from her. Written in a dual timeline, the story switches between the past and the present and in addition to present-day character Nell, who is grieving the company of both of her parents, we are introduced to past-day character Annie, a mother grieving the loss of her baby to sudden infant death.
Any reader thinking that the subject of grief dominates this novel would be very much mistaken, however, as it offers so much more. Well-written in stylish, elegant prose, Beckerman’s novel offers not only unique insights into what it means to be human but also, in the fictional disguises of Nell and Alice, two endearing humans who I found it hard to let go at the end of the novel. As the title suggests, to love someone truly means to live with some impossible truths. I secretly hope Beckerman will consider writing a sequel, as I enjoyed this novel so much.
My thanks go to the publishers and to NetGalley for the free ARC I was provided with in return for this honest and unbiased review.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is a hat a beautiful, and heart wrenching story of changes, broken hearts, love, and family. Told from two POVs and in two time periods, The Impossible Truths of Love will have you reaching for the tissues more than once. The book is set in the ‘now’ with Nell and ‘then’ with her mother Annie, beginning 35 years ago when she and Bill were newly married. The narrative flows seamlessly between the different characters with strong substiles that make it very easy for the reader to tell who is speaking.

This story will certainly pull readers along, grabbing the hearts of anyone who picks it up and drawing empathy and true emotion in reaction to the characters problems and heartbreak.

This is not a fast paced book that should be speed read. You should take your time and truly absorb the whole story as it really is worth it.

Thank you to netgalley and publisher for providing an e-copy for me to read and leave my honest review. I feel very connected to this book and am happy to recommend it to everyone.

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The safety and security of Nell’s family life is shaken when a comment her father makes as he lay dying leaves her with unanswered questions. Her suspicions are further aroused when her mother Annie, whose memory is gradually slipping away through dementia, makes confusing references about events from Nell’s childhood. What do they mean and is she really who she thinks she is? Will she ever uncover the truth?

Hannah Beckerman writes beautifully. She has the ability to bring grief, sadness and utter desperation alive on the page. Annie’s story is heartbreaking and Nell’s quest to uncover the truth hooks you in from the first page. The book is written in two time periods. It tells the story of Annie and her husband, Bill, who have suffered an unspeakable tragedy early on in their marriage and the current story of Nell, their daughter, who is desperately trying to unravel the mystery surrounding her childhood.

The events which occur, although hopefully rare, are certainly not beyond the realms of possibility and will no doubt leave the reader wondering which choice they would have made. This is the perfect Book Club read; hours of meaty discussion are guaranteed!

Thank you to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing for an ARC in return for an honest review.

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I had already requested this book for review when I went to see Ruth Jones at a literary festival and she recommended it as one of her top three reads. As soon as I started reading, I could see why. The narrative was convincing and highly engaging from the first page. Any kind of family mystery is right up my street and this is among the best. I believed in each of the characters and their stories and was highly motivated to find out the truth behind Nell’s origins throughout the novel. I highly recommend this book!

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Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman. This author was new to me and I will definitely look into reading her earlier books.
This book is the beautiful touching story of Nell, her two older sisters and her parents and the secrets they each hold. On her father’s deathbed, he mumbles something to Nell that causes her to begin questioning everything she has known about her life. So begins Nell’s journey to find the truth.
This was a very emotional story. Some trigger warnings for anyone that experienced the death of a child, as well as those that have contact with people with dementia. The author delved into both of these areas with such extreme detail and sensitivity. I was totally absorbed by this book from the very start, wanting to discover the secrets that the family is holding onto and how they will be explained. If you love family dramas, I highly recommend this book.

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A book about family, loss, grief, and discovering who you are. I was drawn in by the description of this book. Nell, the youngest daughter in her family, hears her father’s deathbed confession and is left reeling. Her mother can’t answer her questions as she has dementia, but we meet her throughout the book thirty-five years previously.

Where to start with this. I enjoyed some moments in this book, but overall I found it underwhelming. I seem to be one of the few who wasn’t hooked by this book. The writing for me became a little laboured and rambled on at times. Unfortunately, I became bored very easily when reading this and was very happy to get to the ending. For me, one of the highlights of the book is the pure love the characters can have for each other. These passages are overflowing with emotion and beautiful to read.

One of the main issues I have with this book is that there are no content warnings. Death features heavily throughout the book and the characters’ subsequent grief. It is difficult to read, and anyone going through something similar in their own lives might find it upsetting.

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This book felt a little too familiar for me to thoroughly enjoy it. The premise of the story being a dying man's partial confession set the tone for "I've read this before". I enjoy this author's writing though and would definitely read other books that she writes.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an early release in exchange for a fair and honest review.

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Thank you NetGalley for the ARC of this book. I really enjoyed it! Great story! Nell's father dies and her mother is suffering from dementia. On her father's dead-bed he shares something that makes Nell question all she has ever known about her family. I enjoyed the going back and forth in time showing Nell's parents and what they went through starting their family and then present day when Nell is an adult exploring her family history. I give the book 4.5 stars. Only not 5 as I would have liked an epilogue with information on Nell's future.

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Wow! I was really impressed with this story and the path it took.
It was nothing I expected and it was such a great read. My theory of what had happened and why were completely incorrect and I loved that!

It is told in 3 person and from present to past in different POV’s, but primarily from Nells’.
Nell’s story will break your heart and we how a simple and innocent statement by her dad on his death bed changed her life and everything she knew.

A huge thank you to NetGalley and Amazon Publishing for the advance copy to review.

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Fantastic plot, which kept me turning the page, and staying up late last night to finish. This is a story I will be talking about to others, because I totally love the concept and it had me questioning what I would do in those circumstances.

I really enjoyed the back and forward chapters to keep the tension up (although I did tend to skim some of the THEN chapters, as they did get a bit repetitive for me). That's the only reason I give this four stars instead of five.

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The story was quite interesting but not original enough to keep me hooked. I found it overwritten with a lot of tedious introspection and, just when the story becomes interesting, it stops. I would have found the relationship between Nell and her real mother more interesting.

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This is a moving novel about love, loss and family secrets. Skilfully told in two different timelines (mother Annie in the past and daughter Nell in the present) I found it a compelling read as the family's painful secrets were gradually revealed. Subjects such as death, grief and dementia are treated sensitively and the intensity of maternal love is brilliantly evoked. My only criticism is that it got a bit repetitive at times when describing feelings. Otherwise very well written and structured, with a strong story.

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I really enjoyed this book. Kept me guessing as to what secret Nell's parents were keeping. I had not read any of Hannah's other books but l will be reading them now.

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I thought this would be another light read on a lazy day. Instead I was drawn into the skill fully book that kept me transfixed until the very last page.

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I had mixed feelings. Some of the writing was just lovely and Hannah Beckerman certainly knows how to put words together. My problem in reading was there were too many about the one thing and then the heightened emotion was repeated about the same event as the follow-on parts of the story emerged. I was swamped. So the emotional tug that some reviewers had praised highly was missing for me. Other than that, it was a nice story with sibling antagonism mixed with love and resentment, arising from what would have been an agonising emotional experience (no spoilers)

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What a roller coaster ride of a story! And mostly happened over one long weekend with flashbacks to 35 years earlier. The story is of one woman's journey to learn her history that was unexpectedly triggered by something her father says to her the last time she sees him before he dies. It is pushed along by a number of comments her mother who is suffering from dementia makes. Random comments that don't seem to apply to anything unless you combine them with what her father said and some things she finds as they are cleaning out her parents house in preparation for her mother to move into a care facility. From the very beginning of the book, the author skillfully takes you down one path and you are convinced you have figured out what the truth is only to have a twist thrown in that heads you in another direction altogether. This was a very enjoyable story that held my attention to the very end.

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I really loved this mystery story and found it totally engrossing. Nell is by her father’s side as he is dying of cancer when he tells her that he had always loved her even though she was never his to love. Perplexed by this comment, Nell sets about trying to understand what it meant. The story alternates between past and present but is not jarring at all to move through these different times. Exploring her parents’ marriage, Nell struggles with grief, identity and belonging. A beautifully told tale that immersed me.

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I loved this book from the way it was written, how the characters were developed to the subjects that were touched like love and grief. It is definitely one of my favourite book I have read this year.

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I couldn't really get into this book. It wasn't for me. I couldn't get into the book no matter how hard I tried. I may go back to the book at a later date.

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Thank you NetGalley for allowing me to read this book in exchange for reviews.

This book is like finding what happens in the past. The character Nell discovered about her mother's past when she was a baby. Learn the truth about what happened and why. This is a great book.

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On his deathbed Nell’s father in Hannah Beckerman’s The Impossible Truths of Love tells Nell a secret that she wasn’t his to love. From that point on, Nell is determined to find out who she really is. Told in a dual timeline story format, this well-written book about secrets, grief, loss, identity, and family will have you questioning the powerful emotion of love and what really makes a family.

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Triggers: Loss of a child, depression

The Impossible Truths Of Love is a novel where there is no right or wrong. Emotionally charged this novel is the story of Nell, Annie and Bill. Alternating between the past and present this book is a story of a mother and daughter but with a layer of secrecy.
This novel is a very emotional read. All the characters in this novel have a reason for how they act and behave. It is very difficult to say if I loved or liked it because it's not a subject to be judged. By the end of the novel all I wanted to do is cry. Annie's story and her grief is written so well that it tugs your heart. Nell's confusion at her mother's past behavior, her dad's devotion and her exclusion from her sisters life all makes sense as the story unfolds. A 4 star read but be prepared as this novel definitely is not for everyone as it deals with a very difficult subject.

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A beautiful story of the resilience and power of love. Annie is the youngest of 3 girls, but has always felt left out , the 3rd wheel. When her father makes a cryptic remark on his deathbed, and her mother is dealing with dementia, Annie tries to sort through family secrets while managing a career and her own relationships. I really enjoyed this book and thank NetGalley and the publishers for the opportunity to review it. #lovewins #familysecrets #TheImpossibleTruthsofLove

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A beautiful exploration of what it means to be a family, The Impossible Truths of Love explores the story of Nell and her parents Annie and Bill. Tackling dementia and parental death, the narrator tackles unreliable accounts of her parents past as she searches to find out what her father's last words to her really mean. Told between past tense and present, The Impossible Truths of Love illustrates how far parents will go to protect their children and how simple mistakes can change the course of a family's history.

I really enjoyed this novel by Hannah Beckerman - the prose was beautifully written and she tackled infant death, parental death and aging tactfully. I gave it three stars because I felt like some of the supporting characters got lost in the story - I would have loved to see some resolution between Nell and her sisters, or Nell and Elsa - but they fell by the wayside as the story played out.

Thanks to Net Galley, Amazon Publishing and Hannah Beckerman for the ARC!

Read if you like:

+ Family Dramas
+ Investigative novels
+ Self-identity and character growth

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4.5★s
“You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love.”

The Impossible Truths of Love is the third novel by British TV and film producer, journalist and author, Hannah Beckerman. The last thing that her father said to her before he died has Nell Hardy puzzled. Asking her grieving mother, recently diagnosed with dementia, is unlikely to be fruitful, while getting past the resentment her older sisters bear her is a challenge. Might her father’s business partner, Elsa know something?

As she spends a weekend back in her hometown helping to pack up their parents’ house so her mother can go to a care facility, she comes across certain items: a folder of newspaper clippings about babies and a leaflet on adoption, that cause her to recall snippets of overheard conversations between her parents. In addition, her mother occasionally makes cryptic comments without explanation. She begins to wonder about her past, to ask questions…

Thirty-eight years earlier, Annie Hardy gave birth a little late in life to her third child, a boy, and she and Bill were overjoyed. Until, tragically, they no longer were. Annie was hit hard, and was unable to cope; it took quite some time for her to recover. Then life promised more joy: dare she trust it would stay? Could she survive the traumas coming her way? What was the right choice in the impossible dilemma they faced?

Beckerman touches on topical and age-old themes in this dual timeline story of lies and secrets and agonising discoveries. Her depiction of grief and depression feels authentic, and the attitude of Nell’s sisters will resonate with those who find themselves in the default carer role for elderly, frail or demented parents by virtue of proximity. Fans of Kelly Rimmer’s novels will likely enjoy this one. A moving and thought-provoking read.
This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by NetGalley and Amazon Publishing UK.

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This was such a touching book with so many truths that came unravelling in this family when the father utters one last comment on his deathbed. I devoured this story wanting to know how our main character Nell searches to discover her truth and how she deals with the discovery.

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A deathbed declaration….a series of events over the past 30 years that have led to suspicion along with the declaration add up to something not being quite right in Nell’s world. But who can she ask? Her mother is suffering with Dementia and her two much older sisters are reluctant to share information with her.

And do, Nell goes on a quest to find out the truth about her life, about where she comes from and who her family really are…

Gripping, I really enjoyed this book, It’s full of drama and you’ll be wondering how its all going to play out…very good!



https://mams.ie/forums/topic/the-impossible-truths-of-love-by-hannah-beckerman/

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wow wow wow! What a book - one of the best that I've read in a long time. This book is about Nell, a 30 something woman whose Dad tells her something on his deathbed that triggers off a major train of events. With her mum suffering from Dementia and unable to tell her everything its down to Nell to work out what the truth is. Nell always thought that she was different and its this thought that makes her want to learn more. This book did have some great themes too - families/love/dementia/death and went back and forward between then and now. It kept letting little bits of info and ad it just made me want more and more - i just couldnt put it down. Everytime i thought id guessed what was going to happen then it changed and i was guessing again to the end. This was my first book by this author and i cant wait to read more.

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A wonderful, emotional read! This was so beautifully written that I teared up several times throughout the book.

I don’t want to reveal too much of the story because I enjoyed unraveling the mystery myself. It’s set in dual timelines, 35 years apart. Nell, dealing with her fathers death and her mother’s dementia, is told by her father before he passed, “I have always loved you, even though you were never really mine to love”. This odd sentence sets Nell down a path she never knew anything about and answers questions she never knew she had.

The other timeline is 35 years prior, Annie (Nell’s Mum) and the tumultuous few years she had around Nell’s early years. The grief was palpable and decisions made that had life long repercussions.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book and want to thank NetGalley for the opportunity to read it.

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This was a deeply emotional story of loss, heartbreak, discovering truths, family, acceptance, letting go, trying to figure out who you are, understanding your past and trying to figure out how to navigate your new world. Nell has always felt like an outcast in her family. Her father, the only one who supported her choices tells her something that rocks her world while on his deathbed. And so begins her journey of discovery. This was beautifully written and a wonderful read.

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I loved this story from cover to cover. I truly beautiful story of unconditional love, loss and family. To follow along with Nell and her journey of discovery, was at times a little emotional, but beautifully written and a pleasure to read.

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When Nell’s beloved father tells her on his deathbed that he has always loved her, even though she was “never mine to love,” she is thrown into confusion. She wonders if his mind was wandering or if his words hint at an explanation of why she has always felt different from the others in her family, why her relationship with her two sisters has never been easy and why her mother has been over-protective, keeping her as close as possible. Her mother, Annie, now has dementia, and she keeps referring to things Nell doesn’t understand before relapsing into forgetfulness again. As the narrative switches to the past, Annie’s secrets are slowly revealed as Nell pieces her story together. This is an intriguing and poignant novel, sensitively exploring themes of love, loss and family ties. The impossible choices Annie and Nell face are thought-provoking and the central mystery makes it hard to put down. The ending is satisfying, but it left me wanting to know more, which is a sign of how involving the story is.

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The Impossible Truths about Love by Hannah Beckerman
Thirty something, stem cell academic Nell's father has just died and she spends a weekend at the family home helping her 2 older sisters pack up the house as her mother has dementia and needs to move to a care home. On his deathbed her father (doped up on morphine) tells Nell that " you need to know that I have always loved you even though you were never really mine to love." This starts Nell searching through boxes in the attic and questioning her dad's business partner to find out what her father meant. The story has alternate chapters between "Then" - over thirty years ago exploring her mother, Annie's story and "Now" with Nell's quest.

This has pretty consistent glowing reviews on Goodreads and Amazon about how stunning and heartbreaking the story is.However, I didn't really connect with the characters, I got really bored and didn't ultimately care what the "big secret" was. Everything was related in minute detail, cups of tea, pieces of wrapping paper, shafts of sunlight etc. and there were endless similies like a piece of GCSE coursework - I felt like shouting "get a move on!" I found this a slog.

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It was a really interesting book.It always had something interesting going on.I would reread this book in a heartbeat.

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A heart rendering book of love. How do you keep a secret until your dying day and leave a loved one wondering who they really are. A story that will keep you emotionally at tenterhooks that is brought about by events out of your control. A really good read

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I enjoyed this book. Very different to what I usually really but engaging throughout and I highly recommend.

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I loved this book! A domestic fiction but touches of thriller/contemporary fiction. I loved the characters and the change of then and now POV's. I felt so much for Nell, a character that deserved more, definitely had the short end of the stick. Highly recommend.

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This story twists and turns throughout the pages. In the early stages I has to really concentrate but it was concentration worth investing in. It may have been a story but must be every couples darkest nightmare, saying anymore would need a spoiler alert!

I enjoyed the book and the descriptions of all parties relationships, the suggestions which lead up blocked allies but in the end, well that would be telling, go and read it, it is worth it.

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This novel is told in two timelines: the present day follows Nell as she’s left reeling following a deathbed confession by her father; and it follows Annie 35 years earlier as we see her starting her family and making decisions that will have consequences down the line. I love Hannah Beckerman’s writing and this book is beautiful. I really felt for Nell to have to deal with what her dad said and then not be able to talk to anyone about it as her mum has dementia and now her dad is gone, and to know she might never be able to find out what he meant. The fraught relationship that Nell has with her two older sisters felt really realistic and I ended up feeling for all of them. The two timelines move forwards and you’re left wondering how they’ll converge and what happened in the past. It wasn’t something I saw coming but it felt completely believable and was heartbreaking. I definitely recommend this book!

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A gripping and powerful story about love, loss, and belonging.

When Nell's father makes a cryptic statement on his deathbed, it propels Nell into a search for the truth. The story alternates between Then and Now -- between Nell's search for the truth, and what happened to her mother.

Hannah Beckerman is a new author to me, and I was impressed by the quality of her writing and the way she handled sensitive subjects. The book deals with heavy themes, and the characters' emotions are portrayed with unflinching precision and empathy. I imagine this might be a difficult read for some, but I found it quite lovely and very engrossing. I couldn't wait to find out what the secret was that Nell's mother had been hiding.

A highly recommended read.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing.a review copy of this book.

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Somewhere beneath the surface of our daily life lies truths we're completely unaware exist. Could they be between our parents, our siblings, our upbringing? Perhaps these truths are more common than many realize as they never reach the surface. Buried below many layers of unconditional love, family gatherings and time. Other times those secrets float to the top unexpectedly and cause pain and question our entire existence. The Impossible Truths of Love contains those stories and the repercussions of unintended actions and what happens when time and distance bury them.

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This was an incredibly moving story about family secrets, hidden grief and a mothers love. As Nells father is on his deathbed he says something that starts her on a difficult search for answers. Her mother has dementia and so she has no one to turn to as she tries to deal with her grief for her father and her sense of who she really is.
Told from the persepctive of Nell in present day and Annie, her mother when she was a young mum struggling with a soul destroying tragedy. It was so well written and totally believable I was invested in Nell trying to solve the mystery of her familys past.

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Hannah is so good at capturing sisters and families and all their interactions. THis story was very heartfelt, on so many levels, another great book.

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I really enjoyed this book. When Nell's father, on his deathbed, tells her that he has always loved her even though she was never really his to love, she is left with a massive family secret to uncover. This is made more difficult by the fact that her mother, Annie, has dementia. The story is told in 2 time frames, Nell in current times and Annie from 35 years ago. This is a heart breaking story of love, loss and keeping secrets that can never be told. Thanks to NetGalley for a preview copy.
Copied to Goodreads.

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What a beautiful book of family saga. An emotional and deep story about the turmoils of a family, this book talks about the different problems, struggles and realistic endeavours of daughters, parents and a typical family.

The protagonist of the story is Nell, who is much younger than her sisters and struggle to fit in. Gifted with an aptitude in science, her main support system becomes her father Bill.

When he father makes a remark in his deathbed indicating a secretive past, Nell is worried. When he mother Annie who is losing herself to dementia also makes some statements, Nell tries to unravel the mystery.

The book is emotional and deeply moving. It goes to the time of Nell’s parents 35 years ago and we get to live the life of Annie full of emotional encounters.

This is a very well written book although the book was a very sad one. The mystery wasn’t typical which was unexpected. Author has done a great job with the plot of the story where the readers lived with the women in the book.

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The impossible truths of love is true to the title of an emotional story of love and friendships. I love the descriptive style of writing as I was able to visualise what the characters would approximately look like along with what the background looks like including the city. This description at times triggers the characters to recall memories just from looking at something that reminded them of their memory. Contains some medical jargon to which I feel so the readers obtain an understanding of what some of the characters are going through. This might trigger memories for the reader if they have someone close to them suffering from dementia, suffering from cancer, loss of a loved one. To readers who are left with an emotional upset over some sections of the story please know and understand that it’s just a fictional story and go seek help if required. There were times myself suffered some traumatic memories to which I firmly told myself that this is a fictional not a true story and the story is not yours. I recommend this heartwarming story about finding love, holding of deep and buried secrets and learning to let go of the secrets to readers who love reading fictional stories. The story shows the life of mother and daughter as the deep and buried secret twists and turns within their lives which unravels and becomes known to Nell. A great ending but leaves me feeling of wanting to know on what will happen next to Nell.

#TheImpossibleTruthsofLove #NetGalley
I received a complimentary copy of this book from Amazon Publishing UK, Lake Union Publishing via NetGalley for my honest review of the book. The opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own thoughts, feelings and viewpoints of the book.

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A barely whispered, cryptic and troubling death-bed comment from a father (Bill, my favourite character) leads Nell on a family voyage of discovery that she never imagined she’d make. Whilst still grieving the loss of Bill, she and her siblings have to move Annie, their mother, who is beset with dementia, into a care home. If the truth is to be unearthed, time is of the essence so Nell probes and searches, gleaning snippets of information from a diminished Annie until she has the full picture.

Tragedy and loss, fractured relationships, estrangement and abiding love are key features of the story. The writing flows with ease and the Now and Then structure works well. The novel is not without its flaws though. It is unlikely, in my opinion, that the incident at the core of the novel would have happened in modern times. It is even more doubtful that the paper ‘evidence’ discovered by Nell in the parents house would still be around. The antagonism felt by Annie for Elsa (Bill’s co-worker) is not explicitly explained and it’s hard to understand Nell’s reluctance to share her feelings and discoveries with Josh (her boyfriend.) Furthermore, Nell decides not to let Clare and Laura (her siblings) in on what she has discovered (to preserve the memory of their parents) but it is clear from the very end that the story will not end there, the embers will be reignited and a potential conflagration will ensue. Better, surely, to broach the subject now?

An engaging story, worthy of a read but you may have to suspend belief on occasion and be mildly frustrated at times.

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"An empty platitude, that there is no amount of time that can ever heal this grief."

The story goes on two different times. Nell and her two sisters lost their father and take care of their mother, who has Alzheimer's disease. Nell finds something that is never supposed to understand, her mother's secret, her parent's secret, an old secret that changes her life.

The second story is about a mother who lost her child. Annie struggles to survive, how can be still alive, breathe!

I'm not going to spoil anything so, this was a story in a short version of 340 pages. And I don't know why on earth I gave it 5-star. I hate this book, maybe the only hated book with 5-star. It is a very sad, heartbreaking, and cruel description that makes me cry. Well, ok I shouldn't say hate, but you know what I mean, don't you?

Many thanks to Amazon Publishing UK and Netgalley for giving me a chance to read The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman, I have given my honest review.

"It’ll get easier in time. So many people have said it, on so many occasions, ... none of them have ever lost someone they loved with the ferocity that ... Grief, does not follow a neat, linear trajectory. It does not, contrary to popular aphorism, get easier with every day. It does not gradually recede, like a tide that only ebbs but never flows. Instead , it is more like an unpredictable season of tropical storms that can be whipped into a tempest out at sea before crashing onto land, disabling everything in its path, without any warning."

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I couldnt put this book down. It is such a good story. I wasnt sure if i would like this one but you have to read this one!

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A book about family and secrets, full of powerful emotions and thoughts!
I struggled at times with the emotional aspect, very confronting and heavy.
Overall a gripping story to immerse yourself into, very thought provoking!

Thanks so much to Amazon Publishing and Hannah Beckerman for the opportunity to read this book.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

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Thinking that you don't quite fit in is one thing, finding out that your family isn't your true family is quite another. The journey Nell takes in finding out the truth of where she came from and why it was kept secret is a great story.

Beautifully written and a page turner.

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This novel is a touching story about what makes family family. Nell is much younger than her older sisters. As her Dad dies, he cryptically refers to the possibility of a family secret. Then her dementing mother also starts dropping snippets of information about her past. Nell tried to unravel the truths of her family and her childhood.

Many potential triggers in this one: child loss, perinatal mental illness, patriarchal healthcare. Books like this become harder to read once you’re a mother! I also found the ending quite frustrating as it lacked neat resolution. However, the book was well written and enjoyable. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is beautifully written. The characters are thoroughly believable and the storyline is engaging. I stayed up late to finish it because I felt completely absorbed in the story and invested in Nell's story. It's raw and emotional at times and the tension builds nicely. I was a bit disappointed by the abrupt ending, otherwise it would have been a solid 5-star rating.

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This book begs the question: what does it really mean to be family? Is it genes, shared experiences, or something more? While on his deathbed, Nell’s father makes a pronouncement that makes Nell question her entire life up until that point. And unfortunately for Nell, her mother, Annie, is suffering from dementia and losing her memories by the day. Nell goes in search of answers while her mom continues to add to her confusion with more cryptic comments.

The Impossible Truths of Love alternates between Nell’s search in the current day and Annie’s trauma thirty five years in the past. As we follow these two women’s lives, the reader moves more closely to the truth of the events that brought these two together in the first place.

I found this to be an incredibly quick read and I didn’t anticipate how it would end. Author Hannah Beckerman seamlessly switches between the perspectives of the two women while framing the nuances of what we do to protect those we love most. Thanks to Lake Union Publishing and Netgalley for providing me with this ARC.

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I really loved this book!! It had so many twists and turns. It kept me on the edge of my seat wondering what was going to happen next!! This was my first book by this Author, and it won’t be the last!! Quick read!! Highly recommended!! You won’t be disappointed!!

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On his deathbed, Nell Hardy’s father Bill makes a mysterious declaration to his youngest daughter Nell. He says:

‘I want you to know that I’ve always loved you […] You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love.’

Shortly after, before Nell has an opportunity to ask him what he means, Bill dies. Perhaps her mother Annie knows, but she has recently been diagnosed with dementia and communicating with her is challenging.

The story shifts between the present, where Annie is coming to terms with her father’s death and her mother’s dementia, and the past where Annie is overwhelmed by a series of traumatic events. In the present, Annie and her older sisters Clare and Laura are packing, preparing their family home for sale as Annie will move into care. And Nell wonders about what her father said and what it could mean. The three sisters are not close: Nell is 11 years younger than Clare, and 7 years younger than Laura. Nell has had opportunities that her sisters have not, and Clare in particular seems to resent this.

In the past we meet Annie and Bill as a young married couple. Clare and Laura are young, and Annie wants to have another child. What follows is a series of tragedies and secrets, devastating events which ripple through many lives into the present.

‘Grief, she is learning, is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.’

I found this story moving and wondered how I would deal in a similar situation. I admired Bill’s resilience, felt sad for Annie, and wondered where the truth would lead Nell.

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Sometimes a novel will surprise me with the force of it’s emotional hold. The Impossible Truths of Love is one such novel and I have to say, it stirred up a lot of mixed emotions and has left its mark upon me in a way that now has me waving it around as a must read.

Grief and trauma bleed into a situation where Annie is made to feel as though she is an unreliable narrator of her own life by those who love her and professionals who should know better. The situation as outlined within this story gives credit to the argument that once a person has been diagnosed with a mental illness, this will forever weigh in against them, discrediting them and dismissing their concerns, even long after they have been pronounced well. The way in which Annie was treated after the birth of her fourth child was shameful, even more so on account of its plausibility. I have to say, her husband’s lack of faith in her and his eagerness to just go along with the nurses and doctors instead of stopping and listening to his wife was worse even than the dismissal and patronisation she faced from the medical staff. I was angry at him for his assistance in the creation of a situation that could have entirely been avoided. I can see why things were never really the same between them thereafter.

‘Grief, she is learning, is love’s echo: it is not possible to have one without the other.’

This whole family was broken. Nell was treated very badly by her eldest sister Clare, who even when I (in hindsight) considered the family dynamics and what was going on at key times throughout Clare’s upbringing, I still found her to be a thoroughly unlikeable and entirely unpleasant woman. Laura, the middle sister, was a lot more grounded and easier to like, which just goes to show that two people can have the same unsettled upbringing but turn out entirely different in terms of the effect it has on them. I liked Nell as a character, enjoyed travelling this journey with her, and I really sympathised with what she uncovered about her own history and the decisions she was consequently faced with as a result. It’s not something anyone would ever dream of having to deal with and consequently, it’s impossible to really know how you would handle such a situation yourself if ever faced with it.

The Impossible Truths of Love is one I highly recommend to those who enjoy reading thought provoking novels that really dig deep into their themes. It’s also a great one for showcasing characters who act in ways that we might deem wrong while still totally understanding why they have done so. This was a terrific novel, with its many shades of grey, and I will certainly be reading more from this author.

Thanks to the publisher for the review copy.

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This quiet, tender and beautifully written book is quite difficult to discuss without spoilers.

Written across 2 timelines ‘Now’ and ‘Then’, it traces the lives of Nell and of Annie and Bill, looking at love within families: parental love, filial love and the challenges of siblings and of grief.

A beautiful book that deals with difficult subjects sensitively and wisely. Highly recommended.

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I absolutely adored this beautiful book. The writing was sublime, the story was engaging and the characters were believable and relatable. My only slight criticism is that I felt the last third of the book was a little drawn out and laboured.

We move between then and now, building on the story of Nell. Her beloved father is dying and his last words to her unleash a torrent of questions about who she is. Cleverly answering these questions by travelling back in time, I thought the story developed seamlessly, but also gradually in such a way that the plot was revealed piece by piece to keep the reader engaged until the last page.

A really wonderful story about family, biology and the nature of grief.

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3 1/2 rounded up.

“You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love.” This is the cryptic line we get to work with throughout this book.

Nell is the youngest daughter of Annie and Bill. She was always treated with kid gloves and usually over-protected and not given the freedom to roam. She was always extremely intelligent and outperformed her peers and her sisters, who were quite a bit older than her. She never understood why her relationship with her sisters was strained, but focused on her own goals and life. She became successful and moved across London to her own area. She rarely made the 45 minute commute to see her parents and sisters because of her busy life.

Bill is sick and on his deathbed leaves Annie with that cryptic sentence listed above. Annie is in a fast-moving state of dementia and there is little Nell can do to get the answers she desires. As we bounce between current day and the time around Nell's birth, we slowly watch the heartbreaking story of where Nell came from and why she feels such a disconnect from her family.

I loved that I was left guessing until the end. There were a few ways it could have ended and I really didn't see how it would end! It was awful to see how Annie was ignored and shamed for her postpartum depression. And it makes you appreciate how our medical system has improved! I don't know if I ended this feeling any better, as it really can't have a happy ending, but I certainly got the answers I needed!

There is death and loss, so if that is new for you or a trigger, please tread carefully.

Thanks to NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing for an eARC in exchange for my honest review.

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I really enjoyed this book. It tells the story of Nell whose father, on his deathbed, says something which hints at a secret which Nell knows nothing about. Unfortunately her mother has dementia so she cannot simply ask her. The book tells the story from the perspective of 'then' and 'now' so effectively from Nell's mothers point of view and then her own. The story kept me guessing and a few times I thought I knew what was coming but I was wrong. A lovely story with an interesting twist. I'd definitely recomend.

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I can honestly say I love reading books like this. I always feel like you are getting a little peak into another families world. This family has many secrets and lots of lies have been woven to help everyone move forward. As the two stories unravel all you can feel is the love behind the lies. Every story, every decision was based of the love they shared.

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The Impossible Truths of Love explores various aspects of grief, secrets, family dynamics, illness, women not being believed, the sacrifices people make for those they love and the consequences of them.
I think many would find some aspects of this story very relatable, and although it deals with quite emotionally provoking issues (dementia, death of a child), it does so in a sensitive way. The mystery surrounding what happened all those years ago and Nell’s ‘true’ identity was gripping and had me hypothesising various scenarios and racing through the book.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is a particularly apt title for the work which is a novel but one which deals with realistic and tough subjects which families are dealing with all the time. Not that I am suggesting that we come across such deep and dark secrets in all our families, but we often come across dementia, distorted memories and favoured sibling issues in real life. Having read this book you may well find yourself reflecting on your own situation and in particular, the legacy you leave behind! A thought provoking read as well as a good mystery drama.

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hank you to netgalley.com for the ARC.

This is a very well written book but it is a tough one to read. All sorts of sad things are tied into it...death of a parent, loss of a child, dealing with a parents Alzheimer's disease so it's not a light read. But it is well done, switching between timelines and keeping you guessing so you have to keep reading to find out what happens next.

I recommend this book...but make sure you are in the right space to read it.

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This is a slow moving story that sometimes gets a little tiring because it goes back and forth from the present to the past, but the reader needs to "hang in there" and finish the book. It wasn't disappointing but heart wrenching with a good ending.
Thanks NetGalley!

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The story is of one woman's journey to learn her history that was unexpectedly triggered by something her father says to her the last time she sees him before he dies. It is pushed along by a number of comments her mother who is suffering from dementia makes. Random comments that don't seem to apply to anything unless you combine them with what her father said and some things she finds as they are cleaning out her parents house in preparation for her mother to move into a care facility. From the very beginning of the book, the author skillfully takes you down one path and you are convinced you have figured out what the truth is only to have a twist thrown in that heads you in another direction altogether. This was a very enjoyable story that held my attention to the very end.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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A beautifully told emotionally charged story about family secrets that have been hidden for too long. When Nell’s father makes a deathbed statement that opens up past feelings of loneliness and abandonment. Her suspicions about the family’s past only deepen when her mother, Annie, who is losing her memories to dementia, starts making cryptic comments of her own. Thirty-five years earlier, Annie’s own life was upended by a series of traumas. The decisions she made at the time were motivated by love, but she knew even then that nobody could ever understand what she did.

Full of the power of love and regret at past choices, this is a wonderful story to be savoured, and would be a brilliant book club choice, lots to talk about and debate.

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Firstly apologies for coming late to this book and thank you netgalley for the ARC.

Wow-what a rollercoaster of emotions loved every page! Rarely have I read such expert revealing of facts- just enough to keep you engaged but not enough that you could accurately guess what was to come. I haven't read any other work by this author but so glad I read this. Wish I had got around to it sooner - hope it is getting the reception it deserves

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Wow, I could not put this book down once I started reading. Emotional, moving and in some ways shocking, the story of what makes a family will stay with you. Nell’s father Bill is dying, and his last words to Nell end up leaving her with questions about herself. Strained relations between Nell and her two sisters are exacerbated as their Mom descends into dementia. The two timelines are in the present as Nell tries to uncover some difficult truths, while the timeline of her parents’ childbearing years will tear you apart. I highly recommend this book, but it might be too much for those going through these situations. My mom has dementia, and I felt it illuminating how it impacted Nell and her sisters. Thanks to NetGalley for this well written, truly moving book.

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A sympathetic portrayal of family secrets and hidden grief. I enjoyed the dual narrative and thought that Annie's story, in particular, was engaging and brought something fresh to the discourse about motherhood and maternal feeling. Four stars as it was a little slow at times.

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Thank you NetGalley for my Ebook, The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman. This was the first book I have read from this author and I was excited to read it after reading other reviews. Unfortunately, I didn't love it. It was just ok. The characters were not likable, there were too many details and I felt the story lacked substance. That being said, I still wanted to finish the book to see how it ended.

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This book had me from the very beginning. It is so beautifully written with an emotional punch you will feel long after you close the book.
It deals with the age-old question; How far would you go for those you love? Most of us think we know the answer to that, and as long as it’s hypothetical it is easy to answer. “As far as I need to.”

But when it becomes real, and you must decide to what length would you go to protect or help someone you love, the choice can be harder. Then there is the necessary follow-up, “How far will you go to hide that truth from others?”

I LOVED this book and will be recommending it to everyone.

Thanks to @Netgalley, Amazon publishing UK, Lake Union Publishing, and Hannah Beckerman for the opportunity to read this in exchange for my honest and unbiased opinion.

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Lovely story that i read in one sitting. The author is such a good writer and the overall feeling of the book was a great one.

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The Impossible Truths Of Love by @hannahbeckermanauthor another @netgalley read. I won’t tell you to much about what this book is about because I don’t want to spoil it. Nell’s father is dying on just before he dies he hints at a family secrets. Her mother sadly has dementia and she starts making cryptic comments which gets Nell wondering as to what this secret is. From the very beginning I was intrigued by this book and the characters and the dynamics between the characters. I find sometimes when a book goes between a now and then flow for its chapters, the story can get lost somewhat but this isn’t the case with this book, showing the talent this author has, everything just works with this book and the flow of the story. The story tackles some tough subjects including grief, depression, post natal depression and dementia, all written with heart and sensitivity. Some of the subjects (most) are heartbreaking to read but read on you must, with a box of tissues beside you, it’s a very powerful and emotive read. I could have read this in one sitting it was that good and there wasn’t a slump in how powerful and amazing it is, it’s amazing right up to the last page. Sometime I think books find you, (I think I’ve said this before) and this is one of them. I had seen this book everywhere but it would have been one of those that I would have hoped I would have got around to reading but never would have, partly because I would have thought I would have enjoyed it, judging a book by it’s cover maybe and this is where for me NetGalley comes into its own for me because it introduces me to new authors and books I may never have read. Having just finished it my last thought was ‘WOW WOW WOW’, what an ending and surely that can’t be the last we hear from this story. I have already recommended to a friend and will be doing so again and again and can’t wait for more from this author. I will remember this book and currently have a very big book hangover. Sorry but again Wow, wow, wow, make sure of you read anything this year this is one of them😁❤️ ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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A novel that explores the secrets that families keep. Nell's parents both hint at a major secret - her father on his deathbed and her mother as she progresses into dementia. Nell must determine the secret and then deal with the aftermath. This book really kept me turning the page and made me think that all families have secrets. Not always as dramatic as in the book, but secrets none the less.

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Books about memory, secrets and families are among my favorites so I was looking forward to this! It was sort of a slow-moving mystery about identity. I did feel like it was almost too much trauma going on--dementia, death, adoption, fractured relationships--that the goal seemed almost to make us cry vs share a story. I don't know. Everything in the book was rooted in a different type of trauma and it seemed a bit much. I did like the details and the flashbacks were handled well.

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The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman

To what lengths would you go to protect the ones you love?
In The Impossible Truths of Love, we are in dual timelines. We meet Annie, who has lost a child and struggles so much with this devastating loss. We also meet Nell who, along with her two sisters, must take care of their aging mother who has Alzheimer's. Like all families, Nell's family has secrets that were once buried so far down but now have come back up. I really don't want to say too much as to not give anything away. But if you are looking for an emotional read, The Impossible Truths of Love is for you. Thank you Netgalley for the advanced readers copy in exchange for my review.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is another fantastic novel from Hannah Beckerman who produces the most emotional and heartbreaking books that stay with the reader long after the final page. Nell’s father makes a cryptic comment to her just before he dies and as her mother is suffering from dementia, she is unable to discover what he meant. While clearing out the family home in preparation for her mother’s move to a care home, Nell discovers some clues to a long held family secret.
This novel slowly unfolds by revisiting the past before Nell was born, and during her childhood. I felt so invested in the characters and their story and the final twist was a surprise to me. The book shows the lengths we will go to in order to keep members of a family happy and safe, even if that means personal distress to individuals.

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This is a book about family dimensions and love and trust, which from the beginning of this story is under the microscope. I didn’t particularly like most of the characters but I don’t think that’s relevant. The story is from the pov of Annie’s daughter, Nell whose father on his death bed says something that rocks her world. Annie, Nell’s mother has dementia and is unreliable in her responses. We also get chapters interspersed with Annie as a young mother. These chapters tease us as to what has happened to trigger Nell’s Dad’s last words. A good study of family dynamics.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is a beautiful and emotionally charged story of family, trauma and grief. It’s so beautifully written you really feel the grief with them, and it’s almost too much at some points. However, once you get into that it will just sweep you off your feet.

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I really enjoyed this book once I got into it. All the ups and downs of family drama--the secrets we keep in order to protect the ones we love. Really makes me wonder how I would react in similar circumstances. I enjoyed the ending, though I still had questions about certain choices and dynamics within the family. Still really appreciated my time with these characters, though.

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This was a haunting, emotional story that captivated me from the beginning. It was very well written and will draw the reader in from the beginning.
Many thanks to Amazon Publishing UK and to NetGalley for providing me with a galley in exchange for my honest opinion.

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I received this book as an ARC from NetGalley.

Her father's deathbed declaration sets the stage for Nell's search for long-hidden family secrets. To what lengths do we go to protect those we love? This is an emotional family saga that began before Nell was born.

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I loved this, i loved and connected with the characters. This was a slow moving book which i stuggled with at first but glad i kept going. A realistic story of daughters, parents, sisters, heartbreak, changes and broken lives. A beautiful and emtional book

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Firstly thank you to Net galley and Hannah Beckerman for this amazing book.

stop everything you are doing and just sit and read till the end . Don't miss a word!
This author needs to be on everyone's top 10 lists of most reads .

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Secrets. The need to belong. Feelings of inadequacy. There are so many emotions that flow through the pages of this book. The story moves back and forth in the past and present. The family drama is heartwrenching to experience. And you will feel every emotion as you delve into the lives of the characters. This is not a light and easy read. But it is worth every tear you shed as you travel through the family dynamics and the choices that are made.

Thank you to NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing for my advanced review copy. All opinions and thoughts are my own.

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"You need to now that I have always loved you even though you were never really mine to love." Nell's dad leaves her with this statement on his deathbed. Her mom, Annie, is suffering from dementia so Nell can't rely on her to figure out what he meant.

As Nell tries to figure it out she is also working alongside her sisters to take care of their parents home & belonging, and finds some pieces that might help her find out the truth. Many family secrets and feelings come to light as the story is told in past/Annie and present/Nell.

I enjoyed the book, and the writing was excellent. 3 1/2 stars.

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I had the absolute privilege of being able to read this thanks to @netgalley for their gifted e-copy in exchange for an honest review. And privilege it was!
Imagine losing your parents.. twice! Essentially this is Nell’s reality. Because she is not only losing them physically but also theoretically 🙈
As Nell sits on her fathers deathbed.. he whispers these chilling final words of declaration ..’You need to know that I’ve always loved you even though you were never really mine to love..’ hinting at a lifelong held secret needing to be out in the open before he goes. These words haunt Nell and off begins her search for their true meaning. Problem is.. who does she trust enough to ask about this can of worms that will be opened with her questions? Between packing up her parents home and within her mothers dementia spoken fragments of conversation, Nell is able to slowly piece together the truth and has the answers she is looking for. The final piece coming from her mothers confession fuelled memory that she is oblivious of its power punch delivery. However this leaves Nell feeling broken for not only herself, but for her mum and what she must have gone through. This is truly a moving story about memory and losing it, secrets vs the truth and what it means to truly belong within a family unit. The title suggests impossible truths of love and it sums up the book perfectly. It is clearly evident throughout that despite multiple challenges that a parents love trumps all and runs forever deep. And ocean lengths are taken here to protect it at all costs. It is written in a then / now format which I loved and was super powerful reflecting Nell’s view in present time and Annie’s view from the past. This allows the story not only to flow but for the reader to have context as to why certain paths in life were taken. If I had to pick a favourite character it would be Annie and I think this is due to being able to see both sides of her unsensored. Not only is she lost within her memory at current.. she was lost within her post natal depression in past and in both times felt alone. All I wanted to do was give her a big hug! If I could change one thing.. it would be to add one final chapter as the ending left me wanting to know more of how that awkward conversation went down. This was such an emotionally power packed story of the unravelling of two womens stories that were yet so intertwined at the same time.. mother and daughter.. or not. Thoroughly enjoyed this masterpiece!! It will have you questioning morals, the meaning of feeling alone and wondering what the term family actually resembles. Thank you!

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This story is a beautiful and emotionally charged story of family, trauma and grief. It took me a while to get in to but once I had I couldn't stop and had to read to the end. It’s very well written and all comes together well. Thank you.

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The Impossible Truths of Love is a beautifully written story, with a focus on character development and an intricate plot. It moves slow, building a mystery. And relies heavily on the emotion of the story to draw in readers. I enjoyed the novel, but I had to be in the right headspace to read it.

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This is a novel that I’m finding hard to describe; the story drew me in deeply and remains in my thoughts long after I’ve finished it, but it’s hard to describe neatly. However, if you like thoughtful, character based stories that are compelling reading, you’ll definitely appreciate this.

Hours before Nell’s beloved father Bill dies, he makes a strange remark which confuses her. Her mother is unlikely to be much help; dementia is claiming her quickly. But Nell tries anyway, and her mother’s odd remarks and occasional visits to the past only raise greater concerns for Nell.

Nell’s never entirely fitted into her family. She knows her parents love her deeply, but she is intellectual in a way her family isn’t. She’s much younger than her two older sisters, and apart from that gap, there’s some underlying resentment about the way she’s been treated differently. She thinks her parents were more protective and restrictive of her; her sisters think she was the favorite and given special privileges.

It won’t surprise you if I tell you that as Nell pokes at her mother’s failing memories, a great big secret begins to emerge. A secret that is central to how Nell sees herself.

Structurally, the novel alternates between Nell in the present, and Annie and Bill around the time of Nell’s birth. Beckerman keeps her secrets for quite some time, but the alternating timelines helps build a strong understanding of Annie and Bill. They’re truly loving parents, truly well meaning, and have overcome a lot. This makes it more curious as it begins to seem that yes, they’ve been keeping a very big secret from Nell for her entire life.

The question of what the secret is looms large over the novel; we don’t discover it for some time (although there are hints). We very much share Nell’s journey of uncertainty and fear.

This is a delicately written novel. There’s the potential for blame here, but I think most readers will focus more on the dreadful situations and dilemmas that Annie and Bill face, and how that shapes their relationship with Nell, and to a lesser extent, her older sisters.

The novel is very explicitly focused on the nature of love, how it’s expressed, and how it grows and lives. I found a number of parts inexpressibly sad, although it ultimately looks to the positives.

This is not a flashy novel, but it’s deeply felt and deeply moving. I strongly recommend it to anyone looking for something thoughtful that will linger in their memory for some time.

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This novel will stay with me for a long time.

I’m especially affected by compelling, character-driven narratives, and this was exactly that. The nature of love in all forms is sensitively and intricately considered throughout, and Beckerman’s prose kept me intrigued right until the very end. A delight.

Thank you to NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing for the pleasure!

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Wow, this book was a raw one for me due to some of the triggering conten, be warned. That said, the author masterfully addresses a number of life experiences, some more common than others, cancer, dementia, child loss to name just a few.
It explores Nell's family following on from her father declaring his love for her and alluding to the fact she was not in fact his daughter.

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Really good book. The plot was well-written and engrossing. I look forward to reading more from this author.

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I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was quite touching learning about the ins and outs of family life for Nell. I enjoyed following her journey to find out about her past. I would highly recommend this book.

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