"Everything went downhill after the invention of the wheel. Before then, it had just stayed where it was."

Drug-dealer, brothelkeeper, devoted sibling, spy, Manuel Estímulo expected his retirement on a remote desert island in the Atlantic to be one long, well-deserved rest, a descanso before death, devoted to prayer, Real Madrid, and the odd glass of Cardenal Mendoza brandy at breakfast. The other inhabitants, after all, knew to keep themselves to themselves and were in any case preoccupied with maintaining a precarious co-existence with the Gambies, victims of a strain of non-lethal rabies that rendered them something of an inconvenience to the tourist industry. Nobody was going to ask Manuel too many questions about his past.

"For all its downsides, Hell at least offers the prospect of eternal life after death. For this reason, I believe it is too good for some people. Especially some of the people I killed."

But when news reaches Manuel that his Nemesis, the Beast with Three Fingers, has arrived on the island, thereby fulfilling an ancient Falangist prophecy, he is forced to up sticks and make the perilous journey South to the Nazi redoubt of his longtime friends the Rotgütts. Armed only with a baton of chorizo, his Spanish Army knife, and the decomposing but garrulous body of his beloved sister Candelaría, can Manuel make it to safety or will his past finally catch up with him on the Island that Time Ignored?

"Books are like women: Rarely worth the effort."

#NotAllBooks! This book is nothing like a woman. Or any man, for that matter. It is an adventure you won't forget, but also an encyclopaedic sourcebook you will return to time and again, the collected wit and wisdom of the Last True Fascist. Get it now before you're bit!

Descanso, or The Last True Fascist, the latest crime against literature from Jay Spencer Green