this is a book that absolutely blew me away and exceeded any expectations I could have had. I requested this on netgalley because I thought the cover was quirky and the title was funny and I did not expect to love it as much as I did and I also cried not once, but twice.

this book is about Quill who lives with his mom after his dad and brother leave. his dad is an alcoholic and his brother Cam left when Quill was a bit younger. He's 16 now and he and his mom are struggling to get by. they are in this dilapidated rental house with a landlord who is just evil. he doesn't want to fix things and he loves to hold all of his control over their heads.

Quill's mom is working multiple jobs trying to get by and he really wants to get a job to help but his mom wants him to focus on school. when the opportunity arises to start breeding roaches to sell to the pet store, Quill decides to see what he could do.

now there are some things that lead up to that decision but I think it's better if you just read them, I don't want to spoil anything.

So we have Quill who is our main character. he is a great student but this year he's struggling in geometry. he is being bullied by the son of his landlord and is really hesitant to make friends because he fears being left. when twins Harley and Zuri enter quill's life in a more permanent way he really has to figure out if he is willing to open his heart and his life to friendship and help.

I think what makes this book really thrive is the cast of characters. I don't read a lot of books without queer main characters and so I'm always a bit hesitant because I'm not sure if I'm going to see the type of diversity and marginalized identities that I would like to see but this is exactly the way I think white cishet characters should be written. Harley and Zuri are Black, and Harley has tourette's syndrome. there are secondary queer characters. There are characters of all ages and income levels. All of the characters really bring this whole thing together.

I really loved Harley and Zuri and their kindness and strength as a team and as friends to Quill. another character I really loved was Mr Dave who is an elderly man who lives by the pet store that quill sees all the time and they have a great relationship. I loved Mrs P who is Quill's geometry teacher and she really dedicates herself to making sure Quill gets extra time for his tests and a tutor and any help he could need. I loved Quill's mom and how hard-working she was and her dedication to giving her kids the best lives they can have.

this book is so much more than a boy who starts breeding roaches to help pay bills. it is a book about a boy who learns how to let people in again and what living and losing looks like. it's a book about friendships and community and how it's always better to work together than to work alone. it's about listening to others and giving yourself grace.

I should mention that Quill does have anxiety I believe, where he does get extra time on tests and an IEP is mentioned for him. his anxiety doesn't play a super crazy role but it is a factor as well.

then at the end the author's note talks about how she started breeding roaches when her daughter had brain cancer during covid and they were really struggling financially and her family literally breeds roaches in their basement. I love authors who write from experience and knowing all of that makes this book just all the better. All of the information and heart and love that goes into all these characters makes so much sense knowing her story.

A note about the roaches. I am terrified of bugs. like genuinely will freeze and can't focus if I see a spider or a bee or a roach etc and so I was a little worried that I wouldn't be able to get through this book. there is a lot of discussion about different types of roaches and the roach breeding system. I can say I was able to get through it without being like too crazily creeped out but if you have like a deathly fear of roaches I'd like to say you would manage this book but I don't want anyone to harm themselves just to read a story.

anyway this review is very long at this point but I cannot recommend it enough. I genuinely think this might be a perfect YA book.