"We can be powerful beyond our grasp as much as we are vulnerable to even our very own power. The image of holding one's own fire, the light and heat of one's being in hands that are made of wood, for me, is the best metaphor for what it is to be human in this world."

Holding the Fire compels us to reflect on the stories we tell about ourselves and about our world, searching as we do to find where love resides beneath the layers-whether external influences or internal beliefs-that can cover who we truly are born to be.

Part memoir, part art book, Holding the Fire weaves essays and allegorical stories with images of the author's art to illustrate the power of stories in our lives. The central character is a woman who found the love of her life in a man tormented by living in this world with a serious mental illness that took him away from her slowly and then abruptly and completely.

Anya Doll earned the title "expert by experience," having loved a spouse with a serious mental illness who chose to end his life. The middle child of seven, born to a Midwestern farmer who was also the town banker and his city-born, artist wife, Anya learned early to dig for the gold in the middle of chaos. She earned a dual BA in elementary education and theology. Through decades of adventurous employment, she honed her visual art practice and love of story. In 1998, she began writing every morning before getting out of bed. Her visual art resides in places across the US and internationally and enjoyed representation at the Denver Art Museum in 2021. Her public speaking weaves images of her art with lessons of the human condition. She teaches her meditative art practice, process painting, and yoga and guides others through reflection upon their own stories.