Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture is a collection of essays edited by Roxane Gay. Each essay deals with the topics of sexual harassment, violence and rape and the way it is emphasised in modern culture.

I’ll begin with a warning that Not That Bad may act as a trigger for any reader who has been a victim of rape.

I requested this book because I am interested in the sociology of this topic but as expected it was a hard book to read because of the raw emotions portrayed in the essays and the sensitive nature of the topics discussed.

Also, because it is a topic getting a lot of attention recently. In fact, on the day I read it Google employees had staged a walk-out over the way the company treats woman when they have put in a sexual harassment complaint.

The introduction of Not That Bad gets right into the thick of it:

When I was twelve years old, I was gang-raped in the woods behind my neighbourhood by a group of boys with the dangerous intentions of bad men. It was a terrible life-changing experience.

Before that, I have been naïve, sheltered. I believed that people were inherently good and that the meek should inherit. I was faithful and believed in God. And then I didn’t. I was broken. I was changed. I will never know who I would have been had I not become the girl in the woods.

In the years since she had heard lots of similar stories and in order to survive she had convinced herself that what happened to her was ‘not that bad.’ In reality that set a low bar for how she would expect to be treated in future relationships.

Eventually she realised that it was that bad and that a society where these kinds of things are accepted is not good enough.

This collection contains a myriad of similar experiences and essays on the topic of rape culture and victim shaming and hopefully will go a way to helping people to realise that no action, article of clothing or behaviour by a victim can ever be used to justify their rape or sexual harassment.

The voices shared here are vocies that matter and demand to be heard.

This was a tough read but an interesting book but as with any collection there were some essays which were more readble than others.

A difficult read, very difficult in parts.
I often wanted to stop, to look away, but I felt I had to bear witness to what these people, not only women, had gone through - I felt it was the least I could do.
I was very troubled by these stories, there seems to be more of a rape culture in the States than in the UK, where I live, unless I, and my friends, have been very lucky. But nevertheless, these occurrences must be brought out into the open, so that the perpetrators realise the wrongs they’re doing.

I'll join the scores of reviewers stating how important this book is. Not That Bad is an incredibly necessary and powerful collection of essays from a wide range of contributors on rape and sexual assault. I've never before read essays which so accurately and honestly examine rape culture and the impact sexual assault has on its victims. Nothing I say here will come close to conveying the impression this book has left on me, and I can't imagine I'll read a more impactful or well written essay collection this year.

This is a powerful, yet raw, collection of individual experiences of rape culture.  It show how easily lives can be ruined at the hands of others - those who don't even realise they have done anything wrong. 

Sadly, I don’t believe this book will change the world but I do hope it encourages more people to talk about this painful subject which will, in time, bring about a much-needed change to todays world. 

I hope the book sends a message of hope for the future and I would recommend everyone should read this, regardless of gender.

I had a personal interest in reading this book as I was sexually assaulted a number of years ago.  Even now, I blame myself for being in that situation.  That event changed my life forever - I will never again go out alone after dark.  

Thank you to Roxane Gay and all contributors for bringing these stories together.  

Thank you to NetGalley and Atlantic Books for the opportunity to read and review this anthology prior to publication.

This is a fantastic collection of essays that I found incredibly hard to read without having a secondary book to cushion the blows (something I very rarely do).

I really hadn’t expected to find it as difficult as I did, but I think the title really sums up why. I thought I was reading a book about rape in very plain and simple terms, but it’s also about everything else - the simple, everyday comments, glances, grazing of hands and microagressions that we as women often brush off as being not that bad or ‘it could’ve been a lot worse’.

I think I had expected to read a selection of essays contained stories and experiences that I could sympathise with, but ultimately keep at arms reach, that was not the case at all. I was truly surprised by how many of the experiences resonated with me and I think that is why this collection is in part so important.

A powerful, intense and raw anthology of essays about rape culture. It was a daunting book to open, I was afraid of being triggered, and the stories I found were certainly brutal, emotional and often graphic, but I found that I wasn't triggered at all. Perhaps it was being part of a metaphorical sisterhood (recognising that not all the writers here necessarily identify as women) that kept me present and kept the bad memories at bay, perhaps it was the knowledge that I was not alone. This is an anthology that can do that for you, but I also recognise it could be incredibly triggering for others like me - but perhaps that goes without saying for the title.

This is certainly a comprehensive anthology, featuring writers from a multitude of backgrounds with a range of experiences illustrating the pervasiveness of rape culture. Those who were assaulted as children, those who were assaulted as adults. Those who knew what had happened to them, those who were still coming to terms with it because they had thought it was 'not that bad' because it didn't fit the stereotype of rape, or wasn't rape at all.

It feels unfair to be critiquing an anthology of such personal stories, but I ended feeling that I was still missing something - but perhaps it was because I missed a story like mine, as subjective and selfish as that is.

4.5 stars for a powerful piece of work that is fighting to bring rape culture into the public consciousness; nothing less than I would expect from Roxane Gay.

This was a hard book to read. It is a collection of stories of lives that have been touched by the rape culture of our society. Truthful and honest and should be shared with any person who has been told their experience was 'not that bad'.My thanks to NetGalley, the publisher and author for an advance copy in exchange for an honest review.

Not That Bad is desperately difficult to read but should be read by everybody and very soon. The stories written by people that have experienced varying levels of assault really bring home the level of abuse that so many people are subjected to all of the time.

Roxane Gay has done a wonderful thing by bringing all of these stories together. It’s hard reading but that makes it even more important.

The toughest book I have ever read. Everyone needs to read this. Everyone. So many brave stories. Absolutely recommend.

This is a very difficult read. No matter whether you're a survivor of a sexual crime or not, this book will haunt you in ways you cannot conceive.
The anthology hits you right at the core of your emotions. Each story leaving you feeling the emotions that the survivors all went through.
This is a book that is very relevant right now. This is a book that allows people who haven't been attacked to feel some of what goes through the head of someone who has had this sort of crime committed against them.
Be warned, there are plenty of triggers in this book. The book isn't graphic, it's just highly emotional.

This book hurts. As it should.

And I don't really think there is anything else to add. Roxane Gay has collected women's stories, dispatches from the rape culture that we have to live in. There is not so much Roxane in there, she has given the space to those, whose voices could be left unheard. For that I'm grateful.

Oh boy! This book...urrgg...I just have so much admiration for the bravery of the people that decided to speak out. I wish I could hug every single author of the entries and tell them how amazing they are! This book could not have come at a better time, 2018 has seen the rise in the #MeToo movement and a lot of brave souls have spoken out for the first time!
The essays featured within the anthology made me cry and NEED change! It is an enlightening read full of raw and personal encounters with rape and I did have to put it down a few times to breathe and take it all in.
I was shocked by how sexual assault is still a prominent downfall of the twenty-first century and how often it happens. I truly hope this book shocks people into change because HOW is this still happening, no one deserves to have their bodies violated and it MUST stop. As I put the book down I found myself actively searching my brain on how I can contribute to the understanding of rape culture and how everyone needs to be aware of it - I started by recommending this book and giving it to a friend to read.
This eye-opening encounter and insight into something that not everyone can understand is vital in everyone’s life. It is not an easy read, but it is sooo worth it!
Every essay presents the reader with a different encounter of sexual assault which makes the anthology truly special as it gives people agency to express themselves in a culture where they are often silenced.
One aspect that I really admired was the voice given to male victims, often society associates rape victims with being a woman but that is so far from the truth. A victim is a victim no matter their gender, race, class or the culture they grew up in.

Throughout our lives, we, women, are told that what we live everyday - cat-calling, street harassment, sexual assault and everything in between - is just not that bad, it could have been worse. We are told to get on with it, that we are simply being drama queens, seeking attention, making a fuss where there is no reason to. But no , we are entitled to feeling like it’s bad, like it’s our end of the world. We are entitled to our anger, to our screams and protests. No one, no one , has the right to tell a woman that what she has lived is not that bad.

This anthology explains this in different ways through brilliant and heartbreaking essays. I felt angry and sad and disapppointed by the way we, as women, are still treated by today’s society. And this book is a powerful tool to widen a conversation that has been opened and brought to light by the Me Too movement across the globe. It is a depiction of what it means to be a woman today, how hard it is.

I do have my small reproaches towards this anthology - the confusion sometimes between essays, the repetition too. But it still remains an important book that I truly believe everyone should read - no matter the age, the sex, the beliefs.

This isn't a cover to cover read. The experiences documented with this book are raw, painful, and devastating. I found myself putting down the book every so often, just so I could process what I'd read. Many of the stories here were like a punch in the stomach.

While enjoyed is certainly the wrong to use in this instance, the quality of Roxane Gay's writing was extremely compelling. I believe that Not That Bad will still with me for a long time.

This was an ARC in exchange for an honest review. With thanks to Netgalley and Atlantic Books.

This book is an anthology of essays about rape, rape culture and what these things can do to a person. There were so many things that was breathtaking about this book. It left me speechless on many different occasions. Roxanne Gay and gang did a marvelous job in manufacturing this artistic piece full of inspiring essays. If only the people, who really needed the essays, would actually read them rather than people who don’t. It’s always the sympathetic people or as many trolls call them, SJWs that read these kinds of things, rather than the trolls themselves as they are the ones that truly need to know what rape culture and rape does to a person. When writing this review, I’m struggling to express what I truly think about it. It’s simply left me breathless and in awe of such brave people who go through what these people have.

5 out of 5 stars.

This is a soul-scorcher, whether you're male, female, trans, non-binary, gay, straight, white or a person of colour. The collection crosses the spectrum of the human experience and forces you to look beyond the boundaries of your own comfort, recognising along the way that the experience of sexual assault is a unifier for so many people.

These stories are hard to read and they'll stay with you long after you put the book down, bot least because they're real life and truthful as they are heart-splitting. If you're likely o read these stories and feel pain or be triggered, I would suggest reading it with help and support- or not at all. Though an incredible read, I wouldn't force this on anyone because it is so very challenging to conceptualise the grief and pain that comes with this topic. It is, however, terrific.

I found this a real struggle to get through.
In fact, it took me a good couple of weeks - picking up, putting down and then coming back to it.

It is uncomfortable reading - accounts of sexual violence, rape, misogyny and gender bigotry.

But bravo to the brave people who contributed to the anthology.

We live in a world where unfortunately rape culture exists, Not that Bad is a haunting, raw, tragic collection of experiences, which makes for extremely difficult reading most of the time.
However these types of anthologies are so important if we are to change the way sexual violence is viewed and reported.

A book of personal accounts of rape and all the effects of the act which can last a lifetime spreading out like the ripples on the water when a stone is skimmed across it. . Some of the accounts are heart breaking and very moving. Each account is different, some by men others are women's stories but its a book that makes you want to rise up and just shout 'Stop', why some people never tell what's happened to them becomes explained, how they were afraid and thought they wouldn't be believed and just kept their secrets, letting the rapist continue without punishment. Its a book that can make you feel very angry. This is a subject that needs to be spoken of.

Thank you to NetGalley for allowing me to read an advance copy of Roxane Gay’s Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture. The rating and review are my own thoughts and opinions, and have not been influenced by receiving this book to read.

Roxane Gay has compiled essays from people who have experience rape, sexual assault & molestation, it’s a tough but powerful read. In fact, I think it should be a required reading for everyone, particularly before they spout uneducated opinions on the subject. I identified with some stories more than others, which is to be expected in an anthology but every story here is important.

Culturally, this book has come at the right time (#metoo) and I hope it gains the publicity it deserves in the press. Until we change as a society brave people must continue to come forward in this way to make the difference. This book is a must read plus a ‘must pass it on to everyone know’ kind of book!