I received an advanced reader copy of this book in exchange for my review

***4/5***

Cool Sex, by Diana Richardson and Wendy Doeleman is a refreshing book with everything your parents didn't teach you about sex. The book starts with a test to see what you know about sex and the test is really to show that what we think we know about sex isn't necessarily true for everyone. It's a womderful new take on an old concept. I loved this book, it was insightful, easy to understand, and like I said before refereshing. Really you should read it!

This book had some interesting insight into an alternative way to connect with your partner beyond just the physical, to include emotional and a heartfelt connection. It gave me some things to think about and consider, not sure if I will put into practice some of the sexual suggestions or not. But I enjoyed the mindfulness breathing techniques and might put some of those exercises into practice. Thank you netgalley for making this book available to me and allowing me to try something a little different.

My student loves your books so much you did such an amazing job writing this. Thank you so much for helping my students and i during this pandemic!

I wasn't sure what to expect with this book as it is not a subject area that I normally read about. I can't say I completely engaged with it but it is a step in the right direction.

How refreshing! I wish I was given this 10 years ago! I am in my early thirties and it reflects how I want to explore and develop - it is not just for teenagers. If you want to create a healthier relationship with sex this is worth reading in order to widen your options. It provides some useful practical exercises as well as different ways to approach certain elements. A real easy read, very engaging and completely non judgmental in any way. Enjoy!

This book is good if you know what it's about before hand.. I thought that this was a work of fiction. This is more of an informational piece. As, an informational piece, I think that this book was well done.

Intended mainly for young adults, this guide may actually be helpful to almost anyone who is looking for a deeper, mire i timage and mindful connection.

'Cool' sex does not necessarily mean more current or trendy forms of lovenaking, but is meant as an adjective to be distinguished from so-called 'hot' sex, which may be exciting in its own way, but still leave a certain amount of dissatisfaction afterwards, and here the sciencecis in the hormones:. the fast and furious 'wham, bam' kind is, according to this book, more fuelled by dopamine, bringing cheap highs that burn out more quickly. There are other hormones in play that do not, and it is these that the writers suggest will come into play for a more deeply enjoyable kind of sex.

As might already be guessed, this book is really sexing up an old idea for a new generation: that of the ancient practise of tantra - or neo tantra (some of the old yogas may be undesirable in the context here). The aim is to focus a little less on the destination or goal (the orgasm) and more on the journey (mindful, mutual pleasuring). The reader will just have to try some of the techniques described here to see if they really can deepen the experience of love.

Describing different types of orgasms according to which organ is stimulated most seemed a little less helpful - my understanding for example is that differentiating between clitoral and vaginal orgasms was just a psychoanalytical myth, though I have had of the g-spot. The idea that there might be an even more mystical spot further up was quite some news, though the idea of tantra always was that retaining vital energies can and do find their way up the main chakras. This book steers away from pursuing this path too strenuously - the aims here are simply, more to do with making recommendations for a more profound quality to enjoying sex and intimacy.

Thank you NetGalley for providing me an eARC of this book.

A book like this, being published in 2020, should be WAY more diverse. This book’s focus is on male/female sex and barely touches on LGBTQ+ and really leaves out a lot. How can you use this book as a tool to educate when a good portion of the population is left out? Yes, the LGBTQ+ community is mentioned but that’s about it. I’m quite disappointed by this book.

DNF
I was really sad to not like this. I thought it would be exactly the book about sex that I always wanted. The one that would've helped younger me with edicating herself om the subject and becokong less self conscious about sex, discussing it, having it, etc.
However, I didn't mesh with the writing and it felt like it was trying to hard to be relatable? Which may be what teens these days need, but I would have much preferred something a little more clinical. Something that gave you an overview on the subject, taught you about it properly and addressed the insecurities individuals can have about it.
As stated, I didn't finish it. So it might well discussed those things. But the writing just wasn't for me.

Like the title suggests, this is definitely a book that has a target audience of young adults. This is the book in lieu of having "the talk!" This modern day book is the introduction of how to explore one owns body as well as one's significant other. What comes to mind with this book is sexual mindfulness.

Thank you to Diana Richardson, Wendy Doeleman, the publisher, and NetGalley for this advanced reader copy in exchange for my honest review.

Not what I expected at all. Some parts definitely fit Into the young adult genre however some of it felt dumped straight in from an adult tantric sex book.

There are much better sex education books out there

This made for a very fascinating book. I definitely think that if this is your kind of book then you will certainly be happy with the contents. I recommend people to have a read and determine your own thoughts and opinions on this book. Good luck is in order for the author and publisher.

This was my first time hearing about cool sex in context. It was an interesting read. While marketed towards young adults, it can be read by any adult- especially if their relationship is in a rut. I do like the emotional connection that can be achieved through cool sex. The authors are definitely knowledgeable on the subject.

By the description, genre, and title, my expectations were off. Being classified as a New Adult book, I found the “explanations and practical tips” lacking. I’m full aware this isn’t a step by step or anything like that, just going off of what my initial thought was when I requested this book. With that said, I had a hard time getting through the book and really didn’t take much away from it so this wouldn’t be something I would buy myself.

While this book has a place in a public library, I'm not sure I can make it work in a public school collection. Not what I thought it was, so I'm truly grateful for the opportunity to read it beforehand.

This book is not necessarily geared toward the ages of 15-25, those older than 25 can benefit as well. The first 100 pages are so may turn the LGBTQ community away. The book is geared towards male and female sexual intercourse. The LGBTQ community is mentioned briefly.

The tips and tricks are solely for tantric sex. This book can be used in tandem with sexual education courses. To avoid STDs and STIs please utilize condoms, research the proper way to put them on. One can learn a number of tantric techniques, deep breathing and building intimacy.

I received this book in exchange for an honest review.
I really loved the idea of the book. I really admired the author for writing a book meant to educate young adult on sex education. It was a really educating read for me. The only thing I didn’t really like about the book was how it was written. As a young adult I couldn’t really connect with the writing. But overall it was an okay approach to informing teenagers about sex.

I received a free ARC from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review. I am not an expert or authority on sex education, but I am within the age range of the target demographic (15-25), and I have a passion for sex education, particularly for young adults and teens, so I thought I could still bring an important perspective to this book and possibly provide a helpful review.

My hope going into this book was that I would find a new, informative source for young adults that would destigmatize talking about sex and would start a conversation on having a healthy sex life. I was ready to shout my praise of this book from the rooftops. I was severely disappointed.

I don’t think I had a completely accurate understanding of what “Cool Sex” was before I read it. I saw the title and was expecting a down-to-earth discussion geared at teens. I thought it would be a fun, light resource that would maybe talk about some common myths about sex and encourage young adults to be open and communicative. This book does some of those things, but it is primarily about tantric sex. And that’s not a bad thing! There are absolutely benefits to tantric sex that the author points out, particularly how it can be helpful in healing unhealthy habits or ways of thinking about sex that may have been developed from exposure to sex primarily through the media (tv shows, movies, books, and of course, porn).

There are several big problems with this book. First of all, I don’t understand how this book is for young adults. The only thing that really indicates the target audience is the marketing, and the fact that at the beginning of the book, the author explains that her reason for writing it is because she has been approached by several adults asking her for resources on how they can talk about tantric sex with their children. I haven’t read this author’s other works, so I can’t speak to this with certainty, but it feels like she basically just took concepts she’s already written about and repackaged/rebranded them for a younger audience. As far as I can tell, this basically means she just dumbed down things a bit. None of the language in this book felt like it was speaking directly to me, or to my peers. None of the relationships described in the book as examples were clearly relationships between young adults. None of the exercises suggested were specifically targeted at teens. I didn’t feel like this book was for me in any way.

This was especially clear as I read further. The author of “Cool Sex” essentially acknowledges that LGBTQ+ people exist, and then explains that she’s not going to bother addressing them further. The entire book is filled with examples that only apply to a heterosexual, cisgender couple, and the author suggests that if you don’t fit that description, you should just get creative and figure out on your own how you can apply the concepts to your own relationship or body. Telling someone to get creative isn’t representation. It isn’t education. It’s just lazy and dismissive.

I found the way that the author goes about this to be particularly harmful. I didn’t appreciate the seemingly random and pointless use of the term “transsexual” without any acknowledgement that that term is outdated and can be harmful to transgender people. I also found the explanation of “positive and negative energy poles” to be cis-normative and somewhat exclusionary even for cis people. A large portion of this book’s philosophy rides on the idea that women enjoy having their breasts (“positive poles”) stimulated first during sex. Not only is this not even true for all cis women, it’s also a problem for trans and nonbinary people, especially those who experience a lot of dysphoria about their bodies. In the section where the author talks about transgender people (which was less than a page long), she brings up this question: “what happens to your positive and negative pole areas if you change from a woman to a man, or from a man to a woman?” Ignorant, problematic language aside, the author poses this question and then immediately moves on. She doesn’t even try to answer it, or have a discussion about it. This is just one example of the multiple occasions that the author mentions LGBTQ+ people and then brushes them off almost immediately after.

There’s also the fact that some of the things in this book are just misinformation. The author recommends putting on and using condoms while the penis is soft. This might be somewhat effective for protecting against STDs, but anyone who has taken even a basic sex ed class knows that it isn’t effective for preventing pregnancy. I appreciate the author trying to advocate for safe sex, but using a condom without an erection just isn’t a particularly safe measure.

I was honestly blown away at how unhelpful this book was. Maybe if it had been even shorter (because it’s only a little over 100 pages), I could have understood not including anything besides basic examples of straight couples, but the book repeats itself a lot. Points are brought up over and over again, with very little being added to the conversation each time. Why not use that space to talk about something more inclusive or educational? I felt like I completely wasted my time reading this, since I forced myself to finish it despite how it managed to be boring and somewhat offensive at the same time.

I do think this book has some merits. I think tantric sex is worth talking about, and I’m glad there are people trying to talk about sex that differs from our society’s standards. I just wish it had been executed better.

When discussing sex, conversations can be uncomfortable, awkward, and sometimes may lead to false beliefs and practices. For young adults, "Cool Sex" can be the perfect piece of literature to help with learning more about sex without having to have "the talk".
Ten chapters busting myths, sharing truths, and tips about sex. Also, focusing on ways to improve sex between partners of different sexual preferences; making things calmer to last longer in the bedroom.
P.S. Love the Kung Fu Panda quote at the end.

As I was reading Cool Sex I really felt like I could take away something from this book . It discusses love and sex in a positive and fluid way.