very well written and entertaining, this was a book i greatly enjoyed and I look forward to read more books from this author in the future

TV star Essie Lay's career was in meltdown, when a face from the past, rising director April Eden, gave her a way back into the limelight with a leading role in her ground-breaking film, The Vanished Woman. The film is now up for a raft of awards, and is sure to herald great things for director April and 'born again' star Essie. However, on the night of the glamorous British Film Associate Awards, where they both stand to win, April receives a call from Essie to say that she cannot face turning up to the ceremony.

April makes a last minute dash to Essie's mansion, Lotus Lodge, in affluent Hampstead, to try to persuade Essie to attend the event, but instead of having to find a way to calm her anxious star, she is faced with a very different sort of dilemma... for Essie lies dead, face-down in her luxurious swimming pool. April is forced to make a decision whether to deal with Essie's tragic demise now, or continue the night as if nothing has happened. The choice she makes takes her on a dangerous path that has her confronting uncomfortable truths about her own and Essie's pasts, and the connection that lies between them.

In an absolute masterclass of plotting, Helen Monks Takhar spins a jaw-dropping tale of betrayal and revenge in the brutal world of film and television production. Told through the voices of April and Essie, the story unfurls in delicious slow-burn style in the past and the present, cutting back and forth between the time the two women met, the paths of their careers, the film production that reunites them, and the chaos that ensues from April's decision. Each thread adds context, and atmospheric texture to the story as a whole, and Monks Takhar uses them to stunning effect by gradually exposing the secrets at the heart of this mystery, and the truth about the moments that have defined April and Essie's relationship. It is not often that I really do not know where a story will land, but this genuinely had me second guessing myself the whole way through, until the cracking twists and turns in the final throes of the novel brought everything together in a series of moments of cleverly conceived clarity.

Not only is this a thriller that keeps you on your toes with its drama, but it positively thrums with themes for you to get your teeth into on both the personal and professional fronts. Monks Takhar examines how abusive relationships and dysfunctional families affect the course of Essie and April's lives in a way that makes you sick to your stomach, and she has a ball using them as motivators to drive a story centred around the darkest of emotions. But what impresses me the most is the spectacular way she explores many facets of control, exploitation, manipulation, expectation, and sexism, through the many shades of meaning in her excellent title, Nothing Without Me.

This is a classy novel that begs to be consumed in a single sitting. It will keep you turning the pages well into the night - and leave you with a lot to ponder on about the entertainment industry, and the pitfalls of celebrity, particularly when it comes to the way men and women are treated so differently. I loved it!

Thank you to hq for the chance to read a early copy in exchange for a honest review .
I have been a big fan of Helen’s writing since I devoured her debut many years ago .
She writes unrealisable and conflicted women perfectly!

This gives us a peek into the world of film and tv and all the highs and lows that come with that . But it’s their time to shine isn’t it?
So why is there a body to deal with …..

Twisty ,tense and addictive. Characters you love to hate or vice versa .
Who can be trusted and at the end of the day are we all being our true selves ….

Food for thought as we get inside these very different heads and see how it all crashes .

Excellent psychological thriller packed with anticipation and unpredictability.

This book stopped me in my tracks a bit. The two strong female lead characters April and Essie are developed in such a way, that it’s difficult to take sides! Both on the receiving end of different horrible incidents that alter their lives they find themselves going down paths heavy with consequences. . Their fluctuating friendship is at times toxic. The storyline of the dark side of fame really gets you thinking about how people are treated, and the impact it has on their lives. This book starts off slowly but then picks up speed at a great pace and is a real page-turner. The style of writing, flipping between several years in the past and present day is a good way of revealing the story as bit by bit you start to put the pieces together.
A very good read.

A very clever twist on the puppet masters of fame and the girls fighting back, This is a slow burn that is worth the payoff. Grab your cup of tea and dive in.

Plot

April Eden is about to have the night of her life. The Vanished Woman, the film she wrote and directed is up for a raft of major awards. Her leading lady, Essie Lay, is on the cusp of a stunning comeback after the disturbing scandal that ended her small-screen career a year before.

When Essie messages April to say she can’t face the ceremony, April presumes nerves and goes to her Hampstead mansion to persuade her to attend. Instead, April finds Essie dead in her swimming pool.

In that moment, April makes an agonising decision, which will force her onto a course of action she couldn’t have imagined. If she is to find out what happened – and protect her own freedom – April is going to find herself face to face with some of the most powerful people in her industry, unforeseen dangers, and discomfiting truths from Essie’s and her own past.

Review

This book is not for the faint-hearted. It starts with the narration from the dead actress observing her own body and her friends as they deal with the immediate aftermath of the situation. This is what starts the chain of events that you cannot prepare yourself for.

The narrative flashes between April, Essie and also the past and present day. Childhood friends with hideously horrid families, neither woman really has their life together and are deeply affected by an incident in their past but to say anymore would be a major spoiler.

It is also a tale of the perils of fame for women and how differently they are treated in the industry. A name check of some of the most famous tragedies that involve celebrity women quickly gives you the sense that the author will not hold back in letting the reader know what is involved as a woman in the entertainment industry. And this is a conversation, in this reviewer’s opinion at least, is way overdue.

There are some difficult scenes and descriptions, such as familial manipulation, drug use, and sexual assault but again, this is done with sensitivity but not shied away from. The author shows this is its full, brutal light.

The twists that come your way are unexpected and caused me to drop the book several times in the two days I spent reading it. Monks-Takhar keeps you guessing right until the very end and I believe as a female reader, that you will be very satisfied with the outcome.

In conclusion, this is a very clever, hard-hitting thriller that serves as a lesson for those who want to dabble in the fame game. I would highly recommend it.

Rating

4 stars

Recommend

Yes but with trigger warnings as stated

Thank you to HQ Stories for an advance copy in exchange for an honest review

Essie Lay, BAFTA nominated film star, is floating face down in her pool instead of picking up her award. Is she alive or dead? Definitely Dead thinks April Eden, Writer and Director of “The Vanished Woman” the film for which they are both nominated. April, on her way to the ceremony, has called in to Essie’s home, “Lotus”, to check that her publicity shy Star is on schedule, only to discover Essie in the pool, empty Champagne bottle and scattered pills spilled on the floor. The right thing to do would be to jump in, retrieve the body, start CPR, call the emergency services, but April doesn’t do any of these things, partly because this will ruin the triumph she feels she merits after working her way up for nearly twenty years in the TV and Film world. The other reason for not responding correctly is Jags, her boyfriend, who swiftly takes control of the situation. His proposal is that they go to the ceremony, but text a message to Essie’s sister and manager, Janine, saying they are worried that Essie will not come to the ceremony and suggesting that she calls round and manages her. However, Janine doesn’t do this and, when Essie wins the Best Actress Award, goes on stage with April, and reads out Essie’s speech saying, among other things, that she intends to disappear, drop out, vanish. Next morning, April, Jags and Janine return to “Lotus”, the former expecting to find a body the latter expecting to castigate her sister. However, there is no body (nor champagne bottle, nor pills), but also no Essie. Is she alive or dead? Either way the question is where is she?
The story is told in chapters which alternate between Essie and April, and across time from when they first met as the youngest and most minor of crew members in a television studio. Through this mechanism we learn of their friendship, estrangement and rapprochement, of their difficult family backgrounds, of Essie’s rise to fame destroyed by scandal and her rise again thanks to April’s film. The style is a bit slow, especially early on, but the plot is complex and requires careful thought on the part of the reader, so perhaps a moderate pace is helpful. There are a lot of reveals, not twists per se, and once there are sufficient scraps of detail it is not too difficult to figure out what is going on. Throughout the story there is a focus, more or less overt, on the struggle for recognition that women have to overcome in the misogynistic world of TV and Film. There is justification for this, and don’t doubt that there has been, and probably still is, a problem but perhaps it is laid on a bit too heavily because it gets in the way of the plot. Overall it is a good, solid and interesting tale.
I would like to thank NetGalley, the publishers and the author for providing me with a draft proof copy for the purpose of this review.

I love HMT and have read all of her work, but this book was hard to grab on to with the multiple narrators and somewhat slippery plot.

This isn’t one of my favorites but I would recommend it for a beach read.

A good thriller set in the glamorous world of show blitz. Twisty, dark and well plotted. It kept me guessing and hooked.
Recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher for this ARC, all opinions are mine

Great start. So many questions. a feeling of sixes and sevens due to alternating narrators, and also how could we hear the first narrator in chapter 1? I’ve settled in for a good read.
The start is gripping. Half way through I have no idea if the narrator is reliable, but as layers and incidents are revealed I remain gripped.
80% in and things are clearer from the past but I have no idea how it will link to the present we experienced at the start of the novel. Still gripped.
Well. I’ve finished it and was gripped throughout and satisfied by the ending. 4.5 rounded up.

I loved the authors first book VERY much - the follow up also liked but this apologies I could not relate to or get into at all. -it was over wordy right from the start and the characters unlikeable from the get go - dnf at 10%

This was an interesting thriller with a view of ripping down the glitzy curtain of fame to expose a corrupt underbelly. It pulsates with anger and has some excellent rug-pullers of twists. However, I was not enamoured with the overall ending and think it dulled the impact slightly for me.

I have read and enjoyed this author's previous books so I was quite excited to get my mitts on this, her latest. And I wasn't disappointed.
We follow April Eden as she is about to attend an awards ceremony where she is up for a very prestigious award, the winning of which would catapult her star into the stratosphere! She is worried abut her leading lady, one Essie Lay, who is, shall we just say, a bit fragile, with a chequered past. So, on the way to the ceremony, which Essie drops out of attending, April pops in to check on her. And finds her floating face down in her pool. The mess and detritus strewn around all point to suicide so, April, in a bit of a panic, and swayed by her boyfriend, proceeds to the ceremony with him, leaving the mess to deal with later. Only, when she returns to deal with it, there's no sign of a body, the scene is also clean. What on earth is going on...?
And so begins a rather intriguing mystery which held me rapt all the way through as I tried to second guess what on earth was going on! Layered through the mystery we have Essie's past and her attempt to try and get back in favour, the treatment of women in the film industry, cancel culture, and that's all before we try and work out what actually happened to Essie. Alive or dead? If alive, is she working alone, what is her endgame. If dead, suicide or murder? Either way, who moved the "body". When you also factor in April receiving scary nasty messages, you know you are in for a wild ride...
Told in the present and also back a few years, detailing how the two women met and how their paths - together and separately - led them to the fateful night... With the past injected at exactly the right places to explain and progress the present day action.
Characterisation is tricky. They are all, in their own ways, both likeable and unlikeable, and I did take a wee while to figure some out. Essie and her sister's relationship was, shall we just say, eye opening! And with the way things transpired early on, I was powerless to work out who to trust...
With secrets and lies aplenty, and a healthy side order of dysfunctional behaviour, all set in the murky (male dominated) world of film, this is a book that keep on giving all the way up to the wholly satisfying, and shocking end.
My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.

I really struggled with this book unfortunately. It sounded like the kind of book that I would love but I found myself getting bored.

The 2 main characters were hard to tell apart,I had to keep going back to see who's point of view we were hearing. There was also too much jumping back and forth in time, within the same chapters. I just didn't engage with the story the way that I felt that I should have

I can see that not everyone agrees with my feelings, can't love them all.

Thankto the publisher for the chance to read this early.

Amazing book!
I was thoroughly engaged throughout this book and I didn't want to put it down! The author captured my attention from the get go! Five stars from me :)

#NothingWithoutMe #NetGalley
April Eden is about to have the night of her life. The Vanished Woman, the film she wrote and directed is up for a raft of major awards. Her leading lady, Essie Lay, is on the cusp of a stunning comeback after the disturbing scandal that ended her small-screen career a year before. When Essie messages April to say she can’t face the ceremony, April presumes nerves and goes to her Hampstead mansion to persuade her to attend. Instead, April finds Essie dead in her swimming pool. In that moment, April makes an agonising decision, which will force her onto a course of action she couldn’t have imagined. If she is to find out what happened – and protect her own freedom – April is going to find herself face to face with some of the most powerful people in her industry, unforeseen dangers, and discomfiting truths from Essie’s and her own past.
Thanks to NetGalley and HQ for giving me an advance copy.

This is the first novel I’ve read by the author and I was drawn to it by the cover and synopsis. It begins on the night of an awards ceremony when director April discovers the body of her friend, actress, Essie Lay, in a swimming pool. The novel then moves back in time to when the women meet at the start of their careers and catalogues their friendship and estrangement.
The novel started off slowly and I found it very hard to connect with the author’s style of writing, which didn’t flow well for me. There were sections I had to re read just to make sense of them and overall I found it to be a tedious read. I had no connection to the characters and so no real interest in the conclusion.
Sadly not for me but others have enjoyed this novel.
Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read and review this digital ARC.
2.5 stars

I have to admit that I struggled with this novel, although I think many people will enjoy it. It is set among the world of celebrity and filmmaking, our two main characters being the Director, April Eden, and fallen TV star, now lead actress in April’s movie, Essie Lay.

The novel begins on the night of an awards ceremony, in which both April and Essie are favourites to win the Best Director and Best Actress awards. Essie sends a message to say she will not attend, so April and boyfriend, Jags, head off to her mansion to try to convince her to come and find her floating in the pool. Jags persuades April to attend the awards as though nothing has happened and, on their return, the body has vanished. All of this is in the book blurb, so no spoilers that you could not easily have picked up from the cover.

We then go back and forwards in time, to when both were young women runners, at the bottom rung of success. They become friends and then fall out and when Essie’s career crashes, it is April who gives her another chance. If you like novels about female friendships, the toxicity of life in the public eye and a sense of empowerment, you will enjoy this. I did enjoy it, but with reservations. I could not buy into leaving your friend floating in a swimming pool and leaving, or many of the other plot twists and turns. The characters were just not well rounded enough for me to believe in their actions.

Overall, an interesting message, but I think this one will be forgettable. I received a copy of the book from the publisher, via NetGalley, for review. Rated 3.5

2024 52 Book Challenge - 14) A Grieving Character

This was a very, very slow burn novel. So slow that I struggled to read it. The second half, I was pretty much disinterested in the novel, so I skimmed it. The characters were very, very flawed and the novel basically revolved around that fact, as it was more of a character driven plot than an action plot. I personally thought that it was way over complicated and convoluted.

While I didn't really like this style of novel, I know a number of people who would love it, because it's not a badly written novel, and the female empowerment message was pretty nice, regardless of the events in the novel.

A gritty insight into the nature of fame and how women are treated once they are in the media spotlight. Essie Lay was everyone's darling until she wasnt- and the press and fans have turned on her with no mercy at all.
April has known Essie for a long time, always in the shadows, but as April's fame as a film producer has grown, she has become the one in the position of power, able to direct Essie's fortunes again.
The story jumps back and forth through varying perspectives, telling the story of first Essie and then April as their fortunes rise and fall.
Clever and insightful storytelling.