My Secret Self: Trials and Tribulations of an Innocent

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Pub Date 18 Sep 2018 | Archive Date 25 Jun 2019

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Description

"A warm-hearted, honest and gratifying tale that delves into the life and times of a woman who has overcome hardship, turmoil and adversity. As I read this, I found myself relating to stories such as 'Philomena', perhaps even 'Flowers in the Attic' and 'The Color Purple' and even a nod to the recent movie 'Brooklyn.'"- James Davidson, author

My story starts at sixteen on my return home from school with my sister. There was a storm brewing and a message was conveyed to me on that dirt track we walked home from school on. Little did I know my life was about to change when I received that message. It was my first calling to remember I am more than my physical self.

Our house was on a farm and everyone on this farm was totally absorbed in their own world of sadness, grief, and I guess, regrets. The unthinkable happened to me under the noses of my female carers. My father was abusing me and I was accepting his advances. I needed lots of love and I couldn’t get enough. This made me vulnerable to him.

My mother packed up and left. She couldn't tolerate my father’s abuse towards her, hitting her to appease his controlling mother. She left my sister and me with my grandma. My father was devastated, used me to comfort him, and took me with him when he searched for our mother. On her return, my father and I were caught in bed, and so my isolation and separateness changed my life. Primary school was tough but high school offered me knowledge and a better view of the world.

At seventeen, freedom at last. I was given a car: a means of escape. My self-confidence grew: my sister and old foes became friends. I was asserting myself and I was not going to be told what to do.

My Secret Self is a much-internalised story of my life and my impressions of the world around me. I keep my views of that world, and of other people, a secret. I feel misunderstood. If I shared my views, I feel I’d be laughed at. I will keep my biggest secret, a secret. I see magic in nature and nature can be trusted to support me in my times of trouble.

"A warm-hearted, honest and gratifying tale that delves into the life and times of a woman who has overcome hardship, turmoil and adversity. As I read this, I found myself relating to stories such as...


Advance Praise

"Is a delightful book and very well written. It flows easily because it's so exciting and it is written with great knowledge of language and the flow of the words is brilliant.

Christine has written her story in chronological order about her childhood and that in itself is an absolute delight, even with those in her family and the things they used to do.

In the background is trauma that Christine had to live through, but the background does not in any way diminish the rest of the manuscript; how she has overcome it is an inspiration to anybody who has to overcome this trauma. It was trauma perpetrated by a family member in whom Christine had trust, and that trust was broken because of what he did to her; and yet despite this, it is still a book of great enjoyment with well-written, lovely little narratives about her childhood, and also the joys of childhood are expressed very beautifully.

Everybody should have a childhood like this because it was such a good time, except for this one traumatic thing; yet Christine has chosen to decide that she will not let that ruin her life; and any other children and grown-ups who have had this trauma of being molested by another person, they could learn a lot from Christine's example.

Christine has shown great courage and fortitude to be able to overcome this very traumatic time of her life and write a book about it, and not a book which is maudlin in any way; it is a book which states what happened, and almost not from an objective point of view, because it would have been for any child a most traumatic event or events.

But she has shown great resilience in deciding (and here is the key word, deciding) to not let those events of childhood ruin her life, and for that, it is much to be commended; not only for telling this tale but for these delightful insights into her childhood with her family members.

The writing is of such a high calibre that anyone would be glad to read this book, and anybody who does not have Christine's book would be very well advised to get it, because it shows insight into certain things that people hush, hush about and Christine has come out boldly and made it known in her book how she lived through these traumas and managed through great fortitude of character to overcome this in her adulthood.

Christine is much to be recognized and praised for being able to do this with what has happened, and I hope you all enjoy reading; "My Secret Self" by Christine Cowin." - Holly Smith, the author of "The Billabong Games"

"Is a delightful book and very well written. It flows easily because it's so exciting and it is written with great knowledge of language and the flow of the words is brilliant.

Christine has written...


Available Editions

ISBN 9780648401308
PRICE A$11.99 (AUD)

Average rating from 4 members


Featured Reviews

Christine U Cowin's book My Secret Self is the story of her childhood and schooldays with a hint of her spiritual beliefs. After initially wondering quite what kind of book I was reading I soon got into it and found myself engrossed. Ms Cowin can certainly write and the story switches from her childhood memories to some quite beautiful descriptions of the nature around her family home then back again quite seamlessly.
Her family were certainly dysfunctional by anyone's standards but I think many readers will,as I did,identify with at least some of the familial interaction and maybe my views are skewed by my own experience but I'm not sure the "perfect family" exists. As Ms Cowin shows plenty of her friends and relatives were also living in less than ideal situations. It's written very much in a stream . of consciousness style and the abuse she suffers is written in a "that's just the way it was" manner as part of the greater story rather than going down the "misery memoir " route.
This is a very honest book, Ms Cowin doesn't flinch from relating some of her own behaviour that many might have kept to themselves but it's all relevant and part of her story.
I wasn't sure what to expect when I started the book and initially it seemed to be jumping back and forth between subjects and timelines but it does all fall into place and I was truly hooked by the end wanting to know more. There will be more and I can't wait to read the rest of Ms Cowin's journey.
Not the kind of book I usually read but I'm glad I gave it a try and I'd say it's one of the best books I've read in 2018.

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What an amazing book! It kept you entertained and unable to put it down. Along with that it ran you through every emotion possible, and then you sit and think "Oh my, this was really her life!". You won't regret picking up this book...well unless you have to be to work early tomorrow!

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I gave this book a 4 out of 5 star review. It was an enjoyable and I would recommend. to others. Generously provided to me through NetGalley

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