Fidelis

A Memoir

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Pub Date 1 Sep 2020 | Archive Date 30 Sep 2020

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Description

In 1998 Teresa Fazio signed up for the Marine Corps’ ROTC program to pay her way through MIT. After the United States was attacked on September 11, 2001, leading to the War on Terror, she graduated with a physics degree into a very different world, owing the Marines four years of active duty. At twenty-three years old and five foot one, Fazio was the youngest and smallest officer in her battalion; the combined effect of her short hair, glasses, and baggy camo was less Hurt Locker than Harry Potter Goes to War. She cut an incongruous figure commanding more experienced troops in an active war zone, where vulnerability was not only taboo but potentially lethal.

In this coming-of-age story set in the early days of Operation Iraqi Freedom, Fazio struggles with her past, her sense of authority, and her womanhood. Anger stifles her fear and uncertainty. A forbidden affair placates her need for love and security. But emptiness, guilt, and nightmares plague Fazio through her deployment—and follow her back home.
 

In 1998 Teresa Fazio signed up for the Marine Corps’ ROTC program to pay her way through MIT. After the United States was attacked on September 11, 2001, leading to the War on Terror, she graduated...


Advance Praise

“This powerful, haunting story by a former Marine officer deployed to Iraq is about being a woman in a traditionally male world, about war and peace and love and death, and about the heat of the desert and the coldness of loss. This is a heart-racing read, full of surprises, with a knock-out message—women, listen up!”—Susan Cheever, author of Drinking in America and Home Before Dark

“A startlingly frank discussion of both a combat deployment and the fallout from an affair, Teresa Fazio’s Fidelis is an incisive, fascinating, and thankfully unromantic account of love and war.”—Phil Klay, author of Redeployment, winner of the National Book Award

Fidelis is an achingly good book about love, war, and return—that rarest of memoirs that manages to be both true to the experience and genuine art at the same time. Teresa Fazio establishes herself as a first-rate writer with this accomplishment. Know her name and this courageous, fierce story too.”—Matt Gallagher, author of Empire City and Youngblood 

“Teresa Fazio’s candid and compelling memoir of family trauma and war sheds new light on the nature of moral injury. Fidelis explores the deeply human need to be connected to others and loved unconditionally, in war and at home. An essential read for those seeking to understand the challenges and questions young women face while serving in the armed forces.”—Jerri Bell, coeditor of It’s My Country Too: Women’s Military Stories from the American Revolution to Afghanistan

Fidelis is a tender, intimate coming-of-age story from a wonderful writer. Teresa Fazio perfectly re-creates the fumbling anxiety of early adulthood, masterfully capturing how the pressures of the Marine Corps honor code, Catholic tenets, and childhood memories combined to complicate her growth into womanhood. For anyone seeking to understand who serves in today’s military, this is a must-read book.”—Kayla Williams, author of Plenty of Time When We Get Home: Love and Recovery in the Aftermath of War

“This powerful, haunting story by a former Marine officer deployed to Iraq is about being a woman in a traditionally male world, about war and peace and love and death, and about the heat of the...


Available Editions

EDITION Other Format
ISBN 9781640123557
PRICE US$28.95 (USD)
PAGES 224

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Featured Reviews

Fidelis is an unflinching and gripping memoir about life as female marine in a warzone, the realities and emotions faced when in that environment. It's a necessary and thought provoking read.

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An eye opening look at life as a young female marine based in a war zone.Thevauthor shares her life her emotions the reality of her service.A fascinating read.#netgalley#unofnebraskapress

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Fidelis is a powerful story about a female Marine officer who served during the Iraq war. An unlikely military officer, Teresa is just 5'0 and has curly hair and glasses, which makes her stand out amongst her troops. She details what it's like to be a woman serving in combat, the constant dangers, and extra precautions she had to take in many situations. Her story is a necessary one, but also comes with a lot of interesting narratives, as she engages in a love affair that she faces consequences from

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Fidelis is a coming of age memoir set mainly in Iraq shortly after 9/11. The author enters the USMC as an officier after college to serve a three year stint. The book centers around her seven month deployment and the remaining time the Marines upon return. Teresa, or T, has a relationship with another officer who is married and a good deal older than she. I enjoyed the description of the time in Iraq, how nerve-wracking it is to never know if any day is your last, and the close bonds formed with fellow Marines. It was interesting to read about the additional hardship women face in the military. I would have liked more exploration of the path Teresa took to join the Marines, reference was made to ROTC, Officer's School, etc. I had to fill in my lack of knowledge via Wikipedia.

Thank you to NetGalley and University of Nebraska Press/Potomac Books for the ARC to read and review.

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This was a different story of war story, and I would say I was about 60 percent in before I realized what sort of book I was reading, and after that I liked it a lot more.

The fact is that nothing much "happens" if you're expecting straight-up violence and catastrophe. The author is a comms officer on a Marine FOB, and rarely (maybe never) goes into Iraq at-large. The relationships are all behind the T-Walls and in the living quarters. It's not a war story as much as a story about people being in a war, and the relationships they crash into.

Fazio self-reflects with honesty and self-criticism, though my complaint is that as a narrator she often presents herself with little agency. Things happen to her more than she presents herself making them happen - which I think is part of the point. Her mistakes and decisions, good and bad, often are of convenience and not her strong participation in the decision. But when you're in a war, or in love, or in telling yourself that you're in love, or in wishing you weren't in love, that can be a way of living.

It is less war, than a story of star-crossed and misguided "love" and people taking advantage of each other. The "romance" is flawed and toxic, and readers who have been on both sides will appreciate seeing what they looked like - pathetic, grasping, scheming, conniving. It's not a good look, and by presenting a fairly unemotional and apparently honest account of self-delusion and willing manipulation, Fazio comes across without whining.

Most of the Marines are presented with the usual rough edges and maybe don't quite break free of convention. Fazio and her close friends are more fully drawn, and I doubt any of them will especially enjoy their portrayals - but I wouldn't enjoy a portrayal of myself, either, when I was in these situations.

What is love, during a war, or I imagine during any life-altering crisis? It's like nothing else - like a sun that never sets. Of course that means you will get one hell of a burn. Fazio does not tell you if it was right or wrong, only what it looks like when it happens.

Strong book. It's a good memoir for those people looking for the words to answer how what they thought was a good idea got away from them.

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**I received an e-ARC from NetGalley for an honest review**

I wanted to like this book, but I just couldn't. I felt mislead by the description which made it seem as if Fazio faced far more of the war on the battlefield.

Overall, the entire book felt overly padded. At least a third of the book was completely unnecessary and slowed the book down. The narrative always seems as if things happened to Fazio rather than as a result of actions and decisions she had previously made. Maybe she's different in person, but Fazio seems to be a very unlikeable person.

3/5 stars, mostly because I hadn't read a war memoir from this point of view before.

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This is an own-voice story where the author struggles with her past during military service. Such an interesting read, I would recommend to those who enjoy an own voice story!

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Men write about the violence of war. Women write about the romance of peace. At least, that is what we believe. Teresa Fazio’s memoir of active military service bucks that trend, writing about the violence of war and romances that can occur during active service. Fazio explains the reason why she chose active service. She then explores her deployment in Iraq with its; violence, funny moments, friendships, and romance. I recommend this book.

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Insightful look into the life of a veteran, especially evocative of the fear of a newbie, which kept me reading.

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Teresa Fazio is a strong female ex-marine and this is her incredible story. I really appreciate and enjoy military non-fiction and women's literature, so this was a double treat to read. It is an extremely engaging subject circling the Iraqi war, naturally action-packed with tons of detail of combat and strategy. This would be a sure hit with people interested in reading about how war affects the lives of those in the center of it. Fazio talks about her decisions and choices and the various relationships she forges along the way. I found it read like a heart to heart talk with someone on the inside of a battleship. Just what a memoir should do in my opinion. I would highly recommend this. 4.5 stars rounded up to 5!

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