10 Code Marriage

The First Responder life is a crazy roller coaster. It is something we become, something we absorb and accept. We love this life, but we can despise it at the same time. It will never leave us. We have been the husband and wife who were searching—the wife longing for someone to understand, the wife not sure how to handle a husband being a First Responder, the husband trying to show commitment to family and his job, the husband not sure of his next steps.

We are a Law Enforcement family who had to walk through the unimaginable—a critical incident. We always knew it was a possibility but until we experienced it, we never grasped how life-changing a critical incident could be. We had to walk through this trial and keep believing that we would be better from it. It was tough on our marriage, our family life. Everything had changed. We know the difficulties and stress, we understand being gone for days on end, we get the pressure of the job, the high-intensity situations, we get it, and we are hoping you can learn from what we have walked through.

This book focuses on a First Responder marriage, whether it is Military, Medical, Fire, Law Enforcement—it’s for all First Responders. However, it is really for any marriage—anyone who wants to grow a deeper relationship with their spouse. It’s for anyone who wants to know a little more about the First Responder life and the difficulties they go through daily in their work and family life.

In no way are we marriage experts. We don’t claim that this book will totally make things better or automatically enlighten you on how to fix everything. However, we share many of our very personal experiences that we hope you can relate to—stories of our trials, ups and downs in a 10 Code Marriage. Our purpose for this book is that you will find comfort in these stories and know that you are not alone—that these chapters will speak wisdom into your life.