"A heartfelt, wry, and amusing memoir of growing up in the '90s and confronting the adult world... Readers happily turning pages to the end of this book will be engaged by a sharp portrait of a man of his times." -- Kirkus Reviews

Where's My Participation Trophy? is an elder millennial coming-of-age story told with irreverence, heart, and just the right amount of existential shrug. Paul Rothenberg grew up in a Long Island suburb that was perfectly average in every way -- which, as it turns out, is where some of the funniest, strangest, and most quietly formative things in life happen.

Through a series of interlocking personal essays, he explores his patchwork identity: the miracle baby of a Catholic mother and an aging, Jewish, bohemian father; the skinny kid who kept stats like a sabermetrician and prayed that allergies wouldn't ruin his social life; the teenager who learned the hard way that HEAT CLEANS; the kid who didn't quite fit with the popular crowd or the outsiders, but wound up borrowing bits of everyone to build himself.

Rothenberg writes with comedic precision and emotional clarity about the friendships that shape us, the awkwardness we try to outrun, the family dynamics that quietly define us, and the universal longing to be seen as somebody -- even if that somebody is just slightly less lost than yesterday.

This isn't a memoir about triumph, nor is it a self-help manual dressed in personal narrative. It's a testament to the perfectly average and quietly absurd lives most of us lead. It's a reminder that meaning doesn't require exceptionalism -- just attention, honesty, and a willingness to keep going.

Funny, reflective, and surprisingly tender, Where's My Participation Trophy? is for anyone who has ever wondered if they were doing life right, and found comfort in realizing no one actually is.