‘In the midst of so many literary reconsiderations of motherhood, this book announces itself as an essential left-field addition to the contemporary canon . . . NANNY NANNY comes at you like an incendiary secret, a sweet and dangerous flame kindled in the dark.’ Jia Tolentino, New York Times bestselling author of Trick Mirror

Our narrator – a career nanny to the children of the rich and famous – is waiting for a call from her first love. Years ago, she made a pact with her ex that if they were both still single at thirty-five, then they would marry and have a baby.

Over a drink with sympathetic friends, waiting for the call, she lays out her rationale for why this is the most logical next step in her life. But each of her reasons opens a door to the past – to the seemingly idyllic childhood she spent under her father’s roof, to the years she spent moving in and out of her first love’s orbit, to the mentorship and judgement of the women whose children she has cared for as if they were her own, and, ultimately, to the abusive relationship with another woman that she barely survived.

She ponders how to fill the gaping void left in the wake of such horrific domestic violence. What’s the next most violent thing a woman can do to herself? she asks. Have a baby.