Somehow a very different book than I expected, but I really loved it!

The story follows Graham, a funeral director, and switches between the present, where Graham is battling a serious illness, and his past.
It was beautifully written and was a really nice mix of spooky, somber, emotional and hopeful. I especially liked the ending

Obviously, as the main character is a funeral director, the book deals with death in all of its forms, so for people who aren't comfortable with that, I would not recommend it

While I was expecting more of a ghost story, this book ultimately ended up being about a much more literal haunting of grief. It was beautiful and heartbreaking, and even though death is waiting on every page you’ll be hard pressed to find a better example of the importance of staying alive

Perfect for fans of Andrew Joseph White, CG Drews, and NBCs Hannibal

It took me a while to collect my thoughts and write this review. I had to really sit with the story for a multitude of reasons.

The story is about Graham, an embalmer, who catches a contagious bacterial infection and suddenly his whole life crashes down on him. As it was advertised as a horror book, I expected there to be ghosts. However, the element of horror was brief but that doesn’t change the fact that he was haunted. Graham was haunted by grief.

I love Graham so much. I love Ava so much. I loved all the characters in the book actually and I had so much empathy and compassion for each one of them. The book deals with very dark themes, which is to be expected as Graham is an embalmer. He also deals with depression, shame, and grief revolving his transness.

I honestly don’t know where to begin praising this book. I loved Graham and Ava’s relationship so much. I like how forgiving and resilient it was. Towards the end of the book, when Graham hits a very low point, I couldn’t help but relate to his thought process. In my opinion, the themes of grief, death, memory, and mortality were all dealt with in a very good manner. Loved this book from start to finish. I cried. Have I said I love Graham? I love Graham. A new favourite book. </3

I definitely recommend this, but it deals with very dark and tense themes so I advise caution!

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher Lucent Dreaming for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This isn't an easy book, emotionally, but I couldn't stop reading or thinking about it. The characters are so well written, so three-dimensional. The setting is so clear, and unusual for the reader but natural for the POV character, and when the POV perspective starts to warp through illness it twists everything with it. The queerness was bedrock to the story, not an afterthought or scaffolding; there would be no story without it, but it isn't THE story. It's in everything. At its core, it's about healing - unevenly, with great difficulty, against your will maybe, both physically and emotionally. And love, of course. There's no loss without it.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC.

So the reason I wanted to read this is genuinely because I saw it on Netgalley and the description sounded like it'd be something right up my street. Friends, I was right. This story was so incredibly beautiful, jarring, and heartbreaking. This is described as both a "literary fiction" and a "horror" on Goodreads, but this for sure falls more into the literary fiction catergory, as the horror elements of this story felt more sad than horrifying. Which also means we've finally found a literary fiction I like! This book truly was filled with a heartbreak that I don't think I was ready for. The way that this character dealt with their queerness, them being trans and their grief was both beautiful and devestating at the same time. I genuinely found myself tearing up throughout this book and just wanting to jump into the story and give our main character a hug. I would absolutely recommend this if you want something that's going to tear your heart out and put it back together again, but please note there are some triggering topics throughout so please look up the trigger warnings before you read this book.

I’ll be deeply, deeply disappointed if this book doesn’t win any literary awards.

I hadn't expected to love this story as much as I did. It's a story about love, death, grief, human mortality, trust and transness. I found myself in love with all the characters including the supporting cast whom all felt uniquely distinct from one another.

Cecil Fenn's ability to make this such an interesting story really impressed me. While the events of the story are fairly unique, we spend majority of the book's runtime sick and trapped at home. Yet I hadn't felt tired or bored by this fact even once. I also greatly enjoyed the intimate access we got to the main character Graham despite the story being in the 3rd person.

Fenn's writing lulled me in and pulled me deep into melancholy without quite letting me drown in it. The topic of transness was also tackled beautifully, I don't think I've ever felt more seen by a portrayal of trans experience. Despite the fact that this is not my personal flavour of transness.

The way the story tackles the topic of queer loneliness and difficulty opening up to people also felt rather true to life and relatable. It does a great job at highlighting how queerness seeps into every aspect of a person’s life due to how discriminated and ostracized queer people are.

Thank you Lucent Dreaming and NetGalley for providing me with a ARC copy of this book. Despite me having had early access, I’ve judged the work fairly and honestly…so please do give it a shot for I do feel that passionately about this book.