I was lucky enough to find an advanced copy of this collection on Netgalley. Thanks to A. K. Herman and for making it available. This collection of slice of life short stories all capturing various vignette' of the Caribbean experience in America.

The characters are written beautifully with brilliant symbolism. Nary a happy ending between them so be prepared to shed a tear.
I did find it difficult to parse some of the dialect but it was fitting to the story and the more complex words were provided in a glossary.

4.5⭐️ Review

How to Lose at Longing by A. K. Herman is a beautifully strange, emotionally vivid collection that really sticks with you. Each story explores longing in a different way; sometimes sensual, sometimes unsettling, often both. The mix of realism and surreal elements works really well, especially in standout stories like Keepsake and Speedo (which will definitely stick with me).

Herman’s prose is also vivid without being overdone, and the characters feel real even in the most unusual situations. The only minor flaw is that a couple of stories don’t hit quite as hard as the others. They felt a bit underdeveloped, like they ended just as things were getting interesting. That might just be me wanting more of Herman's writing, i'm also aware of the fact that not every story in a collection will hit right for everyone. However, because of that, the emotional payoff wasn’t always as strong as it was in the best pieces. Still, overall it’s a memorable read I’d definitely recommend to any short story lover and anyones first collection to dip their toe into.

A. K. Herman’s How to Lose at Longing is a masterfully curated collection that navigates the thin, shimmering line between the visceral and the surreal. With prose that is as sensual as it is unsettling, Herman explores the "peculiar human ache" through a Caribbean lens that feels both timeless and urgently modern. From the haunting, supernatural undertones of "Keepsake" to the sharp, devastating historical weight of "Up Down," each story vibrates with a raw emotional honesty. Herman possesses a rare command of the short story form, crafting characters so tactile and grounded that their longing becomes the reader’s own. This collection is a stunning exploration of survival, tradition, and the ghost-quiet moments that define a life a must-read for fans of literary fiction who crave stories that linger long after the final page is turned.

This was a really poignant collection of short stories. The central themes of loss were explored in really thought provoking ways even though all the stories didn't hit for me. My favorite stories were definitely the titular 'How to Lose at Longing', and 'Speedo'. Along with the central theme of longing, there's a caribbean aspect to most of these stories. A lot of stories dealt with immigration, and didn't shy away from difficult topics. The characters in most of the stories felt real, and i empathized with the impossible positions many of them were put in. I do feel like I didn't fully understand some of the stories, particularly the last story was a pretty unexpected shift that I still don't fully get. Overall, this collection gave me a lot to think about.

Thanks to Netgalley and A. R. Phillips Press for the advanced copy!

A really beautiful, thoughtful and thought-provoking collection that will stay with me. There’s a strong thread of longing running through the stories, but it’s explored in such varied and interesting ways. Some stayed with me more than others, especially How to Lose at Longing and Speedo, which really lingered. The stories around immigration and identity felt particularly powerful, and the characters often felt very real, even when they were in difficult or complicated situations. A few stories didn’t fully land for me personally and there were moments where I wasn’t sure I’d completely understood what the author was trying to do, but that almost added to it in a way. It’s the kind of book that makes you pause, reflect, and sit with it a bit afterwards.

I seem to be in the minority here, but I loved this collection! Maybe because I'm a working class person of color who immigrated from a third world country to a first world country in the hopes of a better life, so most of the story themes resonated with me. And for those experiences I've been lucky enough not to be in the position to relate to, the stories did an excellent job of showing me what they could've been like, and some of those stories stayed with me after I finished.

I think the stumbling block for many readers is the second story, Small Castles, because it's in 1st POV and the English (not just in the dialogue but in the narration) might be perceived as "broken" when it is, in fact, just how English developed in a certain part of the world. I did pause there myself, but when I returned to the book with the intent of really reading (and not just skimming while there's something streaming on the TV in the background, for example), I couldn't put it down.

The variety of the stories was great. I especially enjoyed Small Castles, Speedo, and The Rules + Dance. And I loved how there were speculative elements in some of them, too.

This is my first time reading Herman’s work and I truly enjoy her writing style. This is also my first time reading stories with Caribbean influences and references in them, so it was a fun experience that made me want to learn more. Personally, I always liked reading short story collections, so this book works very well for me.

Some stories stood out for me, especially Small Castles, Keepsake, and Jackie’s story (The Rules and Dance). Even with my lack of knowledge about the culture and references (I’m not from the US, nor the Caribbean), I can still feel connected to the stories and the characters, which I think speaks a lot about this book. While I do find it harder to immerse myself in the last story in this work (Up, Down), I still had a great time reading How to Lose at Longing.

Thank you NetGalley and A.R Phillips Press LLC for the ARC!

I loved the flow of the book. Every chapter for focused on a different character and it made the story interesting. It made me nostalgic in a way since a lot of the stories took place in New York City. I also enjoyed that I was able to read about the immigrant experience and they trials they need to overcome.