Now What?

Navigating an Unimaginable Divorce

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Pub Date 4 Aug 2020 | Archive Date 25 Nov 2020

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Description

Nancy Stevens captures attention as she leads you through an unimaginable divorce story of deception and cruelty. Offering insights and practical take-aways, she gives hope to readers experiencing their own journey.

As a contented Army wife, married for forty-six years to a career Army officer, Nancy is faced with a cheating husband who, after conducting a clandestine affair, suddenly decides to divorce her. In thirty-one heart-breaking chapters, Nancy relates the twists and turns dealing with a pathologically lying husband, a scheming mistress who becomes the second wife, a military bureaucracy that protects its own, the traumas of legal issues and bankruptcy manipulation, ugly depositions and traumatic court appearances.

With creativity, wit and humor Nancy’s account reveals both struggle and hope. Helpful strategies and cogent advice are included at the end of each chapter plus words of encouragement throughout to help other women experiencing or contemplating divorce. These resources will help readers searching for answers on how to prepare, protect themselves and take the next steps.
Nancy Stevens captures attention as she leads you through an unimaginable divorce story of deception and cruelty. Offering insights and practical take-aways, she gives hope to readers experiencing...

A Note From the Publisher

This book is distributed by Ingram Publisher Services and Baker & Taylor.

ebook - ISBN 978-1-950892-60-0

This book is distributed by Ingram Publisher Services and Baker & Taylor.

ebook - ISBN 978-1-950892-60-0


Advance Praise

“Nancy Stevens is a raconteur of the first order. The descriptions of her marital journey through its inception, demise and beyond, evoke such vivid real-world imagery, the reader immediately begins to walk in her shoes….The most valuable lessons a person going through a divorce can be found bound within these pages.”
--Demian J. McGarry Virginia Family Law Attorney

“Nancy is heart-breakingly honest in writing about the pain of her divorce, but she also shows great humor and gives very practical advice to people who find themselves in the same predicament.”
--Ann Bilodeau, Former Development Director, Stanford University

“Some divorce books are entertaining or emotional while others instructional and advisory….this is both. It’s the first book to pick up for a person contemplating divorce - especially a military divorce…this is a must read to arm one’s self prior to battle…should be read before hiring an attorney or diving deep into the divorce process.”
--John T. Winkler, II, Attorney at Law

"As a former JAG officer, handling military divorces, I found Nancy’s book very honest and candid. Blindsided by a philandering husband, Nancy takes you through the entire process [that] could be very insightful for others."
--Mitchell J. Howie, Author of "How to Deal with a Military Divorce”

"You laid it all out—the good, the bad and the ugly. So many will benefit from your fine book—and understand they are not alone. The advice at the end of each chapter is informative and educational…priceless."
--Patricia Gallo-Stenman, author, mother of 3 and fellow divorce journey traveler

“Nancy Stevens is a raconteur of the first order. The descriptions of her marital journey through its inception, demise and beyond, evoke such vivid real-world imagery, the reader immediately begins...


Marketing Plan

Strong media campaign to Womens publications - print and digital

Military publications - print and digital

Therapist/counselor publications

Women's blogger campaign

Social media campaign on FB, Twitter, LinkedIn

Aggressive library campaign to public libraries

Strong media campaign to Womens publications - print and digital

Military publications - print and digital

Therapist/counselor publications

Women's blogger campaign

Social media campaign on FB, Twitter...


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Featured Reviews

I've always wondered if the 1% of the general population stats are narcissistic were correct and this may help with my theory that they're probably much higher. I'm sorry to say but I believe we may have married the same man or at least brothers. I know your pain just not to the same level of time as I bolted after 7 yrs but hung on till 11 yrs to gain access to social security benefits as I calculated I did the time I may as well be compensated. So much of what you noted here resonated especially with regards to legal action, manipulation, false accusations, alimony, etc. The only area I'd disagree was in the noting that after 10k (If I remember correctly) that arrears are considered a felony charge. My child support was in arrears to the tune of 15k while he continued to wine and dine and had the audacity to then file a special relief claim saying he wasn't able to enjoy his own home that he paid mortgage on because his wife and three kids had exclusive rights via Protection from Abuse Order. The special relief was dropped due to being illegal. The arrears were wiped away upon the corrupt judge awarding him 20k in arrears forcing me to pay back my abuser 5k from my own child support arrears. The family court systems are so corrupt in Northeastern Pennsylvania that they are a joke. He was given so much preferential treatment that at one point the judge held up court for his own arrival for a court appointed hearing being he worked a block from the White House. Money and privilege combined with connections is worth its weight in gold. Unlike your situation I was left bankrupt, homeless, and long term unemployed without income, assets or savings. In your case you seemed to have a home, income, assets, credit to fall back upon without the worry of medical issues however, with my situation I had three minor kids -my eldest born med disabled-we had no income, home, or employment & lived off credit for our first payment of 100 dollars after a year and a half of waiting. No alimony here as I was told it would be wiser to go with child support because it would be a longer payout time but when you mentioned paying taxes upon it that may also have been a factor. I had four attorneys (one for pfa, one for bankruptcy, the other two for divorce/child support) and it took 4 years to complete. My ex spouse was like yours in contempt of court multiple times but in the end we finally had to settle because I was dependent upon his income for survival so the excitement over putting him in jail didn't resonate because I gave up my masters to raise my kids as I had medical complications from the start with a placenta abruption that resulted in vater syndrome son via emergency c section and two more high risks elective sections after that which resulted in my parts being shipped far , far away. To say I wish you didn't have to experience this unimaginable heartbreak after 45 yrs of marriage is an understatement. The feeling of playing detective is quite familiar -though I never hired a private investigator- I was left wondering if he hid assets in Cayman Islands and beyond. In addition, you had filed the divorce first so you were able to have the upper hand but in my case the child support was needed to live as homemaker so I had to file that first. For the readers-brownie points- are awarded to the first to file and you're seen in a more favorable light when you do. I would've loved to go the route you did in following through with adultery as I had the proof of the multiple affairs including the adoption of two kids (with one during our marriage) but wasn't able to bring it up during a no-fault since he filed. All in all I will note this -you have to pick your battles carefully-and know the law in your state. Everyone thinks they'll come out with a land rover and a diamond but in many cases you leave with a lump of coal. In addition, know who you are dealing with prior to leaving the marriage. If it's a toxic individual who will delay and have the legalities become costly you're wiser to take what you can and save your sanity. Your story will help so many and I'm so glad you told it. For anyone dealing with malignant narcissist, sociopaths, psychopaths, and domestic violence please visit my fb page: The Lost Self Life After Narcissism. https://www.facebook.com/thelostself/?ref=bookmarks For more information on the Divorcing a Narcissist that I wrote via Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20141204135524-141613845-divorcing-a-narcissist-hiring-the-right-attorney/

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